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United States Cedes Control of the Internet

greenechidna writes "The Register is reporting that the U.S. is relinquishing control of ICANN. The story states: 'In a meeting that will go down in internet history, the United States government last night conceded that it can no longer expect to maintain its position as the ultimate authority over the internet. Having been the internet's instigator and, since 1998, its voluntary taskmaster, the US government finally agreed to transition its control over not-for-profit internet overseeing organization ICANN, making the organization a more international body.'"

33 of 508 comments (clear)

  1. Holy Shit by Skreems · · Score: 3, Funny

    We actually did something in the spirit of cooperation with other countries.

    I think my head is going to explode.

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    The Urban Hippie
    1. Re:Holy Shit by MrShaggy · · Score: 2, Funny

      I thought I saw a pig that flew by my head.

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      I have mod points and I am not afraid to use them.
    2. Re:Holy Shit by clickclickdrone · · Score: 5, Funny

      >We actually did something in the spirit of cooperation with other countries.
      Don't worry, I'm sure it was a mistake and will be fixed in USA V2.1

      --
      I want a list of atrocities done in your name - Recoil
    3. Re:Holy Shit by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      Aha! You foolish Americans have walked right into our trap! You see, this was all an elaborate RestOfTheWorld plot. We've been working on stealing the internet for years, but we needed someone on the inside to make this final blunder in order to set the rest of the plan in motion.

      Unless you pay us 10 million billion dollars, soon, your lottery ball reserves will run dry, and the internets' main series of tubes will become clogged with streaming movies and poker chips. And then, with bandwidth reduced to a scarce commodity, we will launch our worldwide network of Free As In Evil WiMAX, saturating the market completely and killing thousands of innocent corporations.

      Make your time, gentlemen. Make your time.

    4. Re:Holy Shit by Amouth · · Score: 4, Funny

      "Unless you pay us 10 million billion dollars"

      you went throught all that just to get what we already owe you?

      --
      '...if only "Jumping to a Conclusion" was an event in the Olympics.'
    5. Re:Holy Shit by Rob+T+Firefly · · Score: 3, Funny

      No joke. As an American, this good news makes me want to hug someone foreign now. Of course, being American, it'd be a violent, sweaty, obnoxious hug that smells vaguely of burgers.

    6. Re:Holy Shit by AK+Marc · · Score: 2, Funny

      It's apparently illegal even to be seen carrying a bible in school.

      I must have missed that story. However, if something like that did happen, I would bet the ACLU would be in there in an instant fighting for the religious freedoms of the students, as they have so often.

    7. Re:Holy Shit by radinator · · Score: 2, Funny

      "It's apparently illegal even to be seen carrying a bible in school."

      Apparently you've confused 'carrying' with 'beating others over the head with'. It's a common mistake evangelicals make all the time.

    8. Re:Holy Shit by Attaturk · · Score: 4, Funny

      Excuse me if I missed the big story, but the USA hasn't banned Islam or corporate worship. I can't think of another country that is more tolerant of religious freedom than the US, wackos included.

      I can't argue with that. You guys even elect them! ;-)

  2. obligatory by sam_paris · · Score: 5, Funny

    ICANN't believe the USA has done this!!!

    1. Re:obligatory by Corbets · · Score: 2, Funny

      ICANN't believe the USA has done this!!!

      That's good, because, as others have pointed out, TFA would make it seem that we haven't. ;-)

    2. Re:obligatory by Sivar · · Score: 3, Funny

      ICANN't believe the USA has done this!!!

      ICANN

      --
      Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes. --E. W. Dijkstra
  3. Re:Prioritized Citizenship? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I let someone yield in front of me at a merge point today. Can you write up a lengthy story about how that one simple act could change the world as well?

  4. Great... by dfn5 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I suppose we will be at the mercy of the Film Actors Guild now.

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    -- Thou hast strayed far from the path of the Avatar.
  5. Re:Internet as a Sovereign Nation by uncanny · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yeah, but then somebody in this Internet Nation is going to make fun of Dubya's dad and he's just gonna declare ware on it and take it over again.

  6. In response to... by SheeEttin · · Score: 2, Funny

    In response to the old joke, "ICANN, and you can't"...

    ICANN, and now you can too!

  7. Re:US Surrenders? by anjin-san+3 · · Score: 4, Funny

    But france has those 2.5 Gb/s conections now, remember? They could send us their surrender faster than we could even dream

  8. Neoconservative response. by Jerk+City+Troll · · Score: 2, Funny

    “It's like letting the terrorists win!”

  9. Thank heavens by eserteric · · Score: 2, Funny

    Oh thank goodness, now more sensible countries like China and India will have a say about internet policies.

    1. Re:Thank heavens by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      "It is a Jihad for the sake of God and will last until (our) religion prevails ... from Spain to Iraq," al-Zawahiri said. "We will attack everywhere."

      I wonder what this guy has to say about this issue? Maybe we should turn over the control of ICANN to the middle east, then we will see crazy people fight over who was promised a class A network by the profit Mohammad.

  10. What great news! by Syncerus · · Score: 1, Funny

    Soon the Internet can be run with the same efficiency and integrity as the United Nations!

    Syncerus

    --
    "Man is nothing without the works of man" -- Helvetius
  11. Neighborhood by liam193 · · Score: 4, Funny

    So when do we get the press release from Microsoft saying there goes the "Network Neighborhood"?

  12. Backbone? What backbone? by singingjim · · Score: 4, Funny

    As in spine. I understand our "do it our way or die" mentality isn't very popular overseas right now but, no matter what anyone says to the contrary, this cannot be a good thing. We invented it, we've run it just fine so far,. Was it hurting anyone maintaining control of something as democratic as the internet by a the most staunchly democratic and freedom loving country in the world? We should just leave well enough alone.

    --
    Terrible karma and aiming lower, which in this environment of one-sided reason, is higher.
  13. It's a step up. by LKM · · Score: 2, Funny
    Soon the Internet can be run with the same efficiency and integrity as the United Nations!

    Still a step up from being run with the efficiency and integrity of the US government.

  14. Re:Has The Register become The Inquirer? by dr_dank · · Score: 5, Funny

    and Senator Ted Stevens was quoted as saying "Get away from my tubes, you damn fool kids!".

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    Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
  15. However you can still expect congress to pretend by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    to still know how to control it via impractical and unenforeable laws...you know its a series of tubes....

  16. Re:Has The Register become The Inquirer? by OctoberSky · · Score: 3, Funny

    Don't give the Enquirer a bad name, that is a reputable news sorce.

    You'll be sorry when ManBearPig comes to your town, just ask Al Gore if you don't believe me.

  17. Re:Has The Register become The Inquirer? by Scaba · · Score: 2, Funny

    and Al Gore was seen screaming "You can't have my baby! You'll never take my baby!"

    Pedants take note: Yes, I know he never said he invented it. No need to reply.

  18. A little silly by SuperKendall · · Score: 4, Funny

    Do you not think it's a little silly to declare you allegance to a collection of inert minerals? The Earth cares not at all for what we do, it will keep orbiting regardless.

    Or perhaps you are for the "People of Earth". How touching! Except how can you declare an allegance with every single person on earth, some of which may not want you to exist.

    Perhaps you are just for "Life on Earth". If so, would not your best chance to help out all life include dedicating yourself to the role of fertilizer? Otherwise, even if you are a vegetarian, you life on the death of many other organisms.

    Such global statements of purpose simply seem to indicate you have put no real thought into what you mean to accoplish by your declaration.

    --
    "There is more worth loving than we have strength to love." - Brian Jay Stanley
  19. I, for one, welcome our new unfettered domains by jlowery · · Score: 2, Funny

    Such as .grd (Grinding wheel suppliers) .fff (Foo Fighters Fans) .lut (Lute makers) .cwb (Cowboy Neal Impersonaters)

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    If you post it, they will read.
  20. Re:Has The Register become The Inquirer? by SoundDirections · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hell, the interests of the DofC are not necessarily in the best interests of the rest of the government of the United States!

  21. Lotsa internets by Brickwall · · Score: 3, Funny
    "the result would be two internets."

    Oh, goody, lots of internets! Can someone send me one? I already have my own tube.

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    What was once true, is no longer so
  22. so.. to get control back by __aahlyu4518 · · Score: 1, Funny

    which country will they bomb ??