Slashdot Mirror
Telemarketers Use Emotionally Intelligent Software
eldavojohn writes "There's a new kind of software that's being used more and more. It's software that detects emotion and now it's being used in call centers. It's a $400 million industry according to Forrester Research that relies on volume, pitch and even the words & phrases being used. Are we inadvertently getting closer to software that can understand us by filling the needs of telemarketers who need to know when I'm upset that they just interrupted my dinner?"
I SAID PLEASE REMOVE ME!
I said I want to be removed from every single fracking list that your company uses to call people.
NO I DO NOT WANT TO SUBSCRIBE!
liqbase
As if a telemarketer will need a computer to tell them I'm pissed off when I feed them a stream of obsenities for calling my mobile phone. Oh wait, I guess the retarded telemarketers might need a computer for that. Oh wait, that catagory includes all telemarketers, and the rocket scientists who thought that annoying people was a good way to get them to buy stuff.
"We are all geniuses when we dream"
- E.M. Cioran
return SELL_MORE;
}
Still skewed by the people motivating it.
- Kal`Goblez
Telemarketing conversations of the future:
Excuse me sir, would you be interested in..
I'm trying to eat dinner! Remove my number from your..
Thank you for your interest, if I may just have your social security number..
"No doubt one may quote history to support any cause, as the devil quotes scripture." - Learned Hand
Does anyone else see the irony and humour in the article finishing with the line: "said subtler systems are used to identify when an angry customer is preparing to cancel services." - followed by a related headline of "liquid explosives detection device created" *grins* As if the people getting frustrated at wanting to cancel will resort to more extreme methods. *grins*
Video Game cheats, hints a
automated telemarketer calls Phantom
*ring ring*
automatic secretary picks it up
"Hello, this is Phantom's answering service."
"I'd like to talk to Phantom."
"He's not in right now, may I take a message."
"This is QRX credit card services.."
answering service cuts off "He does *not* need another credit card"
"M'am, I can tell you are getting upset right now, but this is a really good deal."
"Cut the crap; NO!"
"Well, maybe you need some credit. He treat you well enough? Maybe we could keep that between the two of us.."
"tell me more..."
I read two of the links, and nowhere did it actually mention telemarketers. It seemed to indicate it was more related to customer contact things where the customer is calling about their service, and getting frustrated with the voicemail maze or the person on the phone with them. Like when you're calling your cable or phone company.
While we all hate telemarketers here on Slashdot, I'm not convinced either of the stories is referring to them particularly.
Cheers
Lost at C:>. Found at C.
Do.
Not.
Call.
List.
I put my number on the national list as soon as it came out, and we get ZERO calls now, and haven't for at least a year. The few that called before the list got widely distributed were politely told to put me on their list. I've had no problems, no dinner time calls, nothing. It really does work.
Come to the University of Mars! Classes starting soon!
... it's for the damned Indians that American company managers seem to think are a good replacement for American people. I swear, they speak perfect English, but I can repeat myself 10 times in a very clear, understandable way to Indian call takers, and it just doesn't register with them.
Specific case: I use Miva Merchant. All of their support is Indian. I called with a technical problem (where are the instructions for this section of software), and I ended up giving up because none of the Indians could understand what I was talking about. I even asked a few of them if they knew what "Miva Merchant" was because I would ask them about this, and it wasn't in their script, so they had no idea how to handle it. I tell ya'... the English is there, but the brains aren't. So maybe this new software could help them. More importantly, maybe it will help ME get my problems solved!
Seriously though, does anyone pick up the phone any more if you don't recognize the number?
Please sign petition to restore sanity to our banking system!!!
http://financialpetition.org/
I'm not sure how we can use this new technology to further abuse telemarketers, but I have faith that the geeks of the world will find a way!
Personally, I think it would be useful to simply confuse the software by saying horrible things in honeyed tones. Especially things that use phrases that the programmers probably wouldn't have thought to include in the code to detect annoyance. "Sure, you can tell me about your companies products, after I force you to watch as I bathe in your offsprings viscera".
You know, ever since I dropped my land line and just stick with a cell phone, I kind of miss having telemarketers to abuse...guess I'll just stick to abusing spammers.
Famous Last Words: "hmm...wikipedia says it's edible"
one of the truly great oxymorons...
Generally, bash is superior to python in those environments where python is not installed.
I don't see anywhere that mentions telemarketers at all (except in the "summary"). The article only mentions call centers, which are more likely to be customer service centers than someone trying to sell you carpet cleaning.
This could potentially be a good thing for the public. If you could measure how upset people get by certain people, then you could fire the ones that make people the most upset. Of course this could also lead to other problems as the goal of support is to solve peoples problems, not make them feel nice.
It could also be a bad thing. Imagine if your called up customer service a few times in a bad mood, and the system flags you as a problem child (or maybe you're just a false positive as it isn't perfect). You then always get treated like you're a jerk.
AccountKiller
Link
You can't talk about Wikipedia's flaws on Wikipedia
I dunno... I did some work for a 911 dispatch training program, part of which involved slicing up a lot of actual calls. What I was working on was for cardiac arrest calls and I found it amazing how calm some callers were.
"My address is xyz. My husband is lying on the floor not breathing. The front door is open. We are in the bedroom. Please tell me what to do."
Others of course were hysteric, but not all of them.
It will never be able to detect sarcasm.
Computer: ADD LiquidCooled TO EVERY LIST
Please, for the good of Humanity, vote Obama.
The greatest way to avoid getting annoying telemarketing calls during dinner is to never answer the phone during dinner!
Are there chances to cause buffer overflows using low level words?
ERROR Please speak clearly.
Could not compute "Dear aunt, let's set so double the killer delete select all"
liqbase
But then how will we be able to hear quality calls such as this one?
I'll just use my special getting high powers one more time...
So will the telemarketers turn this emotional software on themselves?
Output:
Subject: Telemarketer
Aparent Emotion State: Cheerful
Real Emotional State: Depressed and soul crushed.
-Grey
Silver Clipboard: Time Management Tips
Telemarketer: Hi, I'm calling from $COMPANY to offer you $DEAL.
me: I'm not interested.
Telemarketer: May I ask why?
me: Because they're using telemarketing to try to sell to me.
Telemarketer: $LAME_EXCUSE. Goodbye.
I don't see how emotion analyzing software is gonne get them out of that.
So next time they call start smiling and in a soft polite voice say "FUCK YOU" and hang up.
I seem to recall a new device for people with aperger's/autism to help clue them in on the feelings of others. I believe it worked on visual cues. I bet this would be a pretty good addition. Especially for phone calls.
-matthew
"THERE IS NO JUSTICE, THERE IS ONLY ME." -Death
"Hello, Microsoft Customer Service."
... I am sorry. The Windows software is only trying to protect you from piracy."
... Allow me to help. Windows is simply ensuring that you have a genuine, complete, unbroken copy of the software."
"Why is windows accusing me of stealing it?"
"Sir, I can see you're feeling... 'furious'
"Wha... what? How am I threatened by pirates?"
"I understand you are... 'confused'
"So windows is making sure I can use my computer by not allowing me to use it?"
"We simply want to ensure you do not accidentally have an illegal copy of windows from a source that is not trustworthy."
"You want me to prove I'm not guilty so that there's no chance you're not making money? Why you..."
"Sir, you seem to be feeling... Um, there are too many emotion words scrolling on the screen, I can't read them fast enough. Oh shit, I shouldn't have told you about the emotion words."
"I. Will. Kill. You. Dead."
"Ok, looks like we've settled on 'furious' again. Do you have a credit card handy? Sir?" (It looks like he hung up. Now the screen is telling me to lock the call center doors.)
My girlfriend's latest answer to telemarketers, "You know my name, my street address, and who my mortgage is with. That scares me. I think you might be a stalker. If you call me again, I will report you to the police." It seems to have the desired effect.
Some mornings it's hardly worth chewing through the restraints to get out of bed.
...if you are getting angry.
Press the octothorpe if you are confused.
Repeatedly press 6 if you are impatient.
Press any key to be returned to our on hold music.
Have gnu, will travel.
There's your mistake - you don't want them to remove you from their lists.
You want them to add you to their do not call list - the one they are required by law to keep.
"Add me to all your do not call lists."
www.eFax.com are spammers