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Personality Secrets in Your MP3 Player
Jeremy Dean writes "Once past saying 'hello' and 'how are you?' to someone you've just met, what is next? How do we make friends and get to know other people? Psychologists have talked about the importance of body language, physical appearance and clothing but they've not been so keen on what we actually talk about. A recent study put participants in same-sex and opposite-sex pairings and told them to get to know each other over 6 weeks (Rentfrow & Gosling, 2006). Analysing the results, they found the most popular topic of conversation was music. What is it about music that's so useful when we first meet someone and what kind of information can we extract from the music another person likes? "
...music is supposed toc ome from the artists soul. Music explains an artists point of view on subjects.
If you and I like the same artists, chances are relatively high we hold the same views.
Not to mention when I'm blasting Emperor or Dimmu Borgir or Dying Fetus, you won't ask me to put on some Kenny G.
Living With a Nerd
It's much easier to say you like some crappy indie band in order to get inside a girl's pants.
I just bought a new waterbed
and it's made for me and you!
Why don't, we get drunk, and screw...
Maybe Microsoft's Zune is onto something.
New line in a bar on a Saturday night -
"Squirt me three tunes, and I'll let you know if you can buy me a drink."
"Let us raise a standard to which the wise and honest can repair" - George Washington
Music us everywhere, for the big global bands and artists there is generally something to discuss.
It breaks the ice.
liqbase
Once you get past the introductions and the "I like everything except rap/metal/country (choose your typical singled out genre)", there's still plenty to talk about. Songs in general have a good combination of easy to understand qualitative concepts that extend beyond "this is better than that" to discuss. There's also the element of, "Hey we both like this ___, have you tried listening to ___?" Movies are the same way (as shown in that poll), though I'm a little surprised music beat movies by that much.
"Once past saying 'hello' and 'how are you?' to someone you've just met, what is next?"
* Retreat back to cube and resume coding
* Avoid eye contact and hope someone else comes along to relieve you from having to make conversation
* Launch into a rant
* "I don't have friends/conversations/etc, you insensitive clod!"
* Generic Cowboy Neal reference
Oh, yeah, it's not easy to pad these out to 120 characters.
Guy:Hey
Girl:Hey
Guy:Hey, I've got a nano!
Girl:I have to go... and... wash my hair...
Is this a random sample across all demographics and locations? I bet it isn't. It's probably one of those social science experiments where they draw sweeping conclusions about the whole of humanity by interviewing 30 college students.
Or am I too cynical?
"What really matters is what you like, not what you are like. Books, records, films -- these things matter."
LOAD "SIG",8,1
Music just has the right characteristics to be a good conversation topic.
Unless your a farmer or a meteorologist, you can't talk for more than a few seconds about the weather.
Sex, politics, and religion are way too dangerous.
But there is a lot of music, there is a lot to talk about, the chances are that two people selected at random know a lot more of the same music than the same books, the same movies, etc.
You can care enough about music to have a spirited, passionate discussion about it, but few people care so much about it that disagreements could lead to violence, or even to the breakup of a budding friendship.
If you take someone home to meet your parents, you don't need to worry about whether that person's taste in music will match your parents or not.
"How to Do Nothing," kids activities, back in print!
Well, that's probably (another) reason that I manage to have a hard time creating memorable "hooks" with other people; I have practically no interest in keeping up with or finding new music. (It isn't that I don't enjoy nearly all forms of music, mind you, it's just that, for me, there's approximately zero value in seeking out new things to listen to.)
On a related note, the common geek tendency to disparage everyone who doesn't have the same eXtreMely obscure/not-yet-trendy/running counter to current popular opinion taste in music as he/she does is very lamentable. Seriously, most people don't use their taste in music to define themselves, so judging people on that is very narrow-minded.
When 50 or 70 year old persons meet they probably would talk other things.
Wincopy
Me - I love you too.
Her - Yeah, they are a great band.
Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
What truth?
There is no dupe
My first question is "Do you know what Linux is?". I find that is infinitely more helpful than asking what music somebody likes.
The government can't save you.
music is very personalized and ubiquitous. There's probably very few people in America who haven't heard the top 5 songs of the day, whether they like them or not. Music is also easily accessible. In 3 - 5 minutes, a song could deliver lyrics that could change your mood or teach you things - like a little psychology session. And, people usually listen to music at any time for different things. People have music to study to, dance to, listen to when they're happy and music for depression. The easily accessible 3 minute package makes it easy to have music a part of your life unlike any other form of media. Books require a lot of attention and time, and tv isn't as portable and requires too much attention as well. It's really not surprising that music choices are the biggest conversation topic.
Don't trust a bull's horn, a doberman's tooth, a runaway horse or me.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
I hate shit like this. Question: Do you want to know how to make friends, or do you want to make friends? Because when you start to look for the secret procedure behind friendship, you start looking at people as if they were abstract personalities, with some quanitifiable set of properties, and you stop looking at them as human beings. And this attitude can prevent you from actually connecting with them. It's completely absurd. Not everything is meant to be turned into cold science.
they said the average age was like 18. What do 18 year olds have to talk about with random peers? If you mix an accountant and a construction worker, they may have similarities in that they may have kids, be sick of the boss, have funny co-worker stories.
Most 18 year olds don't have profound achievements that have a commonality. If you have kids, you don't mind hearing about other people's kids. If you're in physics club, you probably don't want to hear about a wrestling match.
Studies also show that teenagers blow at empathetic responses, so it harder to tell if someone is interested by subtle clues. If someone follows along on the conversation, its a go... So music is the most common ground shared by all teens.
Except me, i really didn't ever listen to the radio.
Is it sad that I am more likely to recognize you and your posts by your sig than your name or UID?
One thing I would like to see is musical preferences by Myers-Briggs/Jung personality type. I mention this because, although imperfect, I have found that these personality types will give you a lot of information about a person. Someone who is ENFP (typical 'party girl') is mostly only interested in having fun and would likely be really into the pop-music of the day, on the other hand someone who is ISTJ (typical accountant) is probably going to be far more interested in technical perfection and may like Classical or Jazz; the reason musical taste could be important is an ENFP will think that the ISTJ and his music is boring whereas the ISTJ will think that the ENFP's music and lifestyle are pointless.
It would be interesting to see this study taken further. I suspect that there is more to this than just coincidence - that is, one will probably find that people with similar tastes in music often have similar political/religious/philosophical views, education, perhaps even similar skills/interests, childhood experiences, etc. It's just a hypothesis, but I bet there's some truth to it. Any psychologists out there know of such a study having been done?
Deja Moo: The distinct feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Yesterday I was at a small party, the music was from an iPod. One song caught my attention, and I wanted to know what song and artist it was.
It would be nice to have this feature on the (wireless/bluetooth enabled) digital music players: an option to share the playlist, so I could get my cellphone and read (and store) the info on the music being played.
factor 966971: 966971
and your subculture is most accurately represented by its music acts.
I can determine more about a person I meet from, "I like Brittney Spears and Justin Timberlake" or "I have two playlists: GWAR, and other" (including their willingness to admit either of those) than I can from half a dozen other interests and opinions.
Clothing often crosses subcultures, as do slang, political opinion, religious belief and behavior, but there are very people whose personality and approach to life will defy their music tastes. When was the last time you met a hyper-aggressive, Type-A asshole who lists smooth Jazz before Metallica?
Of course, when you meet someone who says they like "everything" and then proceeds to list mainstream rock AND mainstream rap, know the conversation doesn't need to proceed any further because they're a fucking toolbox.
music is directly emotional in a way that movies aren't. it's also highly interpretive, so WHY someone likes something is as important as what they like. it reveals how deeply they think about that certain part of themselves that is ecstatic and interpretive.
:-)
there are very valuable emotions communicated by very shoddy musicianship. there are very bland emotions communicated by overproduced garbage. the conglomeration of what people like is telling at least of what they're going through at the moment.
it tells you if they're into ecstatic fun stuff, if they're into sad stuff, angry stuff. music is cathartic and healing, and it shows you what the person needs. it can be revealing if they view it as entertainment, or just background noise.
the kiss of death for me is, "I like all music," um... like what? "Oh, I listen to everything," and what are some bands you like... "[billboard top 5]" if people like music I don't like, but like it for a reason, and are interested in it, then I'm fine with that. but then, I'm a musician. when people ask me about painters, I say the same thing.
that's my opinion anyway.
Please stop stalking me, bro.
People might enjoy a wide variety of music, or they may have narrow tastes. But I've never met anyone who hated all music.
I know people who hate television and movies, calling them "useless time-wasters". I know people who don't like ice cream and hate dogs. I even know somebody who hates nearly everybody else. But music is different. Some people don't notice it much, but even they know what they like.
People know that their musical choices are very personal. If you ask what kind of music they like, they get a chance to talk about themselves. And many are proud of their musical taste. It's like fine wine. Some people are connoiseurs, and some just drink whatever is available. And a wine expert generally just LOVES to talk about wine.
For anybody who thinks that showing disdain for some form of music somehow increases their credibility on the subject, remember this: nothing turns off somebody else faster than saying their favorite band/artist sucks.
Sony ha
The Onion has a feature called Random Rules. They take a celebrity type person and put their MP3 player on random. Then have the person being interviewed discusses what happens to come up on their player.
It's actually a pretty good feature. I especially liked the one with Gerald Casale.
Weaselmancer
rediculous.
Well, for one, knowing what kind of music someone else listens to is a great way to find out a lot of cultural similarities between yourself and them. Pieces of music seem to compact weeks worth of communication in to a short length of time. If you and another individual are in to the same obscure indie rock band, you're probably going to have a lot of cultural connections. The thing is, it's never really about the music. The non-musical aspects are much more important. How we first came to hear a certain piece, who told us about it, who else listens to it, when it was from, why it was made... all of these are more important than the chord structure, lyrics, melody, and form of the song or piece.
IAAMusician, and let me be the first to tell you that coming to this realization was not easy at first, probably due to the fact that I had to first learn and internalize most of the fundamentals of music, which kept me focused on the structural aspects. That being said, I still have no idea what music is or why I enjoy to make or listen to it. I do know that most people refuse to believe that the reason they don't like rap music isn't because of the sonic structures or lyrical content of the music rather the fact that they cannot relate to the culture that is responsible for its creation. Most musicians I know refuse to believe this as well, and while I cannot even come close to proving my thoughts on this, I know that if it is not the most important aspect of music, it is at least partially true.
For example, last night, I was coming back from a friend's place, and I took a cab, not the easiest thing to do right after the Superbowl ends, especially in New York City. I was lucky enough to get a cab almost right away. The driver, as usual, was minding his own business. He was listening to a type of ethnic music typically known as Hindustani, originating from the Northern parts of India, near the Pakistani border, but also closely associated to Bangalore. I'm pretty in to this kind of music, the vocal styles, the tablas, the sitars here and there. However, he was used to the fact that most white dudes would probably rather listen to classic rock and offered to change to a radio station of my choice. I told him that I was enjoying this music, and immediately, he sprung to life! He handed me the album case and started telling me all about who this guy was that had written the songs, who the singer was, and tons of other information about the music and the culture behind it. Apparently, it was all written by this man, Rabindranath Tagore, who my cabbie enthusiastically told me was the first person from Asia to win the Nobel Prize, AND, that he had written all of his work in his native language. He was overflowing with pride. Not wanting to be the cultural hog of the conversation, he grabbed another CD case from the front and passed it back. It was a compilation of the Greatest Love Songs, with stuff like Genesis, Fleetwood Mac, Foreigner, etc... He had grown fond of listening to an Adult Contemporary station here in NYC and bought some albums and he was really in to it! I told him that if he enjoyed these songs, he would love one of my favorite songwriters, Burt Bacharach. At the end of the journey we both exchanged information about the artists we had recommended to each other and completed our cultural exchange.
So your musical preferences will have a direct relation to your cultural preferences. How all of this applies to todays hyper-culture, with it's multitudes of sub genres and opinions scattered left and right, I have no idea. I'm still trying to figure that one out. I wouldn't have a hard time believing that if two people are both into neo-industrial-hardcore-skate-ska that there would be enough of a cultural/personality match for them to make a good couple.
So, no offense to all of you Julie Andrews fans out there, but the sound of music really doesn't seem to be as important as the culture of music.
I've always prefered a command line interface. GUIs are such a cursory way to interact with a computer.
If they can't answer "What level is your character?" without flinching, it's DATE OVER.
Even though I sing in a church choir, I don't listen to music much, and I don't own any kind of personal music player, except for my old Walkman, gathering dust in the back of a drawer somewhere. When I have the radio on in the car, it's either talk radio, a book on tape or a lecture on tape (currently 9 hours into a 15-hour seminar on Dante's "Comedia").
I'm very knowledgable about art, history, literature, science, religion, politics, cooking, gardening, hunting, woodworking, and a jillion other things. I like to learn about things that interest other people, and I like to talk about things that interest me. I can hold a conversation and engage in a discussion with someone who holds a different viewpoint, without being disagreeable or opinionated. I have a lot of interests, but music isn't one of them.
But because I don't listen to music, the most obvious middle ground is closed to me. I have no idea who any of the big music stars are these days, and do not recognize a hit tune when it is played for me. Even worse, when I say, "I don't listen to music.", it's assumed that I am a completely uninteresting shlub who's leisure hours are filled with TV sitcom reruns.
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. - Mark Twain
It doesn't surprise me that what music you like correlates with certain personality types. However, I think the assumption that people are making, that what music you like reflects something deep about you, is totally bullshit.
Musical preferences, like many other preferences, are formed as much by associations and practice as anything else. Often we might not like something at first or be neutral to it but then when your friends keep putting it on you associate it with good times (or just by repetition) and start to like it. One reason that our musical preferences say things about us is that it reflects on who are friends were and what sort of environment we grew up in. Another reason is that these very societal stereotypes affect what music we are likely to be open to liking.
For instance I know several people who weren't particularly into jazz (never really listened to it at all) but they view themselves as intellectuals and having heard that jazz is so complex and deep if you only know how to listen to it they decided to start listening to jazz. Of course they eventually started to get into but I think they could have done the same thing with Britney Spears if they had honestly believe that the music was really deep and complex.
In other words how we feel about music is often just a reflection about the societal stereotypes we have about that sort of music.
If you don't believe me try and think of how many people you know who claim to hate country music who have ever given it a really fair chance? Same with rap. However, pick a song they think they 'should' like and they will give it a much better chance. Particularly with rap and country our likes/dislikes have a lot to do with our attitudes to social class.
I know many people won't believe me because it very much *feels* like you are responding to something in the music. However, just think about how strong the placebo effect can be and how good we are at tricking ourselves and ask whether this is a plausible explanation.
If you liked this thought maybe you would find my blog nice too:
...As an icebreaker. Classic moment is when Ralph Wiggum is walking with Lisa and he didn't have anything to say, so he said, "So... do you like... stuff?"
I have this theory that all things in life can be referenced by something on Simpsons, Futurama, or Family Guy. So like an idiot, I tried testing this theory once, with an actual pro football cheerleader I was out on a date with. (Yeah, wrong time to test that theory).
We had things to talk about, but when a moment of dead silence came, I did the Ralph act, "So... do you like... stuff?", and she gave me a WTF look. Yep, I quickly moved onto music and other safe topics.
Latent craziness is inversely related to musical taste, or at least obscurity of musical taste. Look at the general lyrical ideas:
Pop: "Something sad happened but I didn't let it get me down"
Country: "Something sad happened but I'll get over it"
Indie rock: "Something sad happened and I want to kill myself"
Metal: "Something sad happened and I want to kill you"
There's plenty of sad bastard country out there, but it's not what most people have in mind when they ask "what kind of music do you like?"
http://poll.imdb.com/title/tt0080455/quotes "Oh, we got both kinds. We got country *and* western."
Generally the only time I actual understand what the band is singing about, is when I'm just about tired of the song. Even then I really don't hear what they're saying most of the time. When I sang for my band, the lyrics usually changed a fair amount every time I sang the song. I did keep some of the words the same, just because of the way they sounded.
If the words are the most important part of the song - then fine go listen to it, but you can drop the music part, since it's not the focus, and call it a poem, so I won't have to listen to it.
..........FULL STOP.
The best quote I ever heard about music was in a discussion about pre-fab boy bands where someone said "I prefer real music. Music made by ugly angry men who write their own songs and play their own instruments."
None of them can see the clouds; The polished wings don't care.
I forget exactly what I have rights to now - is it okay to like music you don't actually own, or can you go to prison for that?
Just to be safe, I now hate all recorded music (at least if RIAA asks).
"The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away" -- "Step Right Up", Tom Waits
But when they do work, you know you may have found someone fantastic. My wife had "I Choo Choo Choose You" engraved on the inside of my ring. God I love her.
Death and danger are my various breads and various butters.