Slashdot Mirror
Female Sharks Can Reproduce Alone
mikesd81 writes "The Washington Post has an article about a team of American and Irish researchers that have discovered that some female sharks can reproduce without having sex, the first time that scientists have found the unusual capacity in such an ancient vertebrate species. Their report concludes that sharks can reproduce asexually through the process known as parthenogenesis (the growth and development of an embryo or seed without fertilization by a male). Scientists started investigating after a female hammerhead shark was mysteriously born at Omaha's Henry Doorly Zoo in a tank that housed 3 female sharks. It was originally thought one had stored sperm from a male shark before fertilizing an egg. However, baby shark's genetic makeup perfectly matched one of the females in the tank, with no sign of a male parent."
Female Sharks Can Reproduce Alone
If male sharks had ST:TNG on DVD they'd be indistinguisable from human male geeks.
Trolling is a art,
They were forced to evolve this ability after all the males were killed in frickin' laser accidents during mating attempts.
... at splashdot.org were just ruled obsolete. Slashdotters, beware ... we're next!
It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
don't clone dinosaurs using shark DNA.
Finally, proof that Mother Nature never intended males to exist at all.
"As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly." A. Carlson
I bet this bitch shark names an innocent male as the father, and the courts force him to pay $2000 in maintenance every month! Fuck!
"She must be a dyke," I'd say.
"No, that's just wishful thinking," my wingman tells me. "Maybe you should change your socks more often."
Shows him!
My wife does this
Not sure why the kids are black tho
Now we know how mankind really evolved. First there was the virgin birth, then we crawled out of the sea and after a few millenia, started to walk upright.
Er wait, I'm confused.
We will bankrupt ourselves in the vain search for absolute security. -- Dwight D. Eisenhower
They should name the baby shark "Jesus." I think that would be kind of funny.
I for one welcome our immaculately conceived virgin-born shark messiah overlords
Nobody jumped the shark then?
Home fucking is killing prostitution.
...can go fuck themselves.
For clearing up a common mis-"conception."
And for not making a lame joke about parthenogenesis like I just did.
The road to hell is paved with Cat 5 cable.
Mr. Liggett: Alright, Lightman. Maybe you could tell us who first suggested the idea of reproduction without sex.
David Lightman: Umm... Your wife?
Mr. Liggett: Get out, Lightman. Get out.
"The Roman Catholic Bible has an article about a team of prophets that have foreseen that a female human will reproduce without having sex, the first time that prophets have found the unusual capacity in such an ancient vertebrate species. Their report concludes that some humans can reproduce asexually through the process known as Immaculate Conception (the growth and development of an embryo or seed without fertilization by a male)."
Teacher: "...And who can tell me the first person to suggest the idea of reproduction without sex?"
Ferris: "Uhm...Your wife?"
Bueller? Bueller?
It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
By not jumping the shark, the male shark has finally jumped the shark.
Oh, yeah, it's not easy to pad these out to 120 characters.
I for one welcome our immaculately conceived virgin-born shark messiah overladies
Considering the relations Jesus had with Mary Magdalene, I would say the Christian church now has to willingly accept homosexuality.
Why bother.
After I read the article I realised that they meant the marine predator; from the headline I thought that they meant lawyers!
No he did not. He got it wrong, and so did Wikipedia. When an object or idea is "conceived" it is called into existence. A person is conceived by the meeting of a sperm and an ovum.
The phrase "the conception of Mary" refers to the event that calls Mary into existence, that is the conception of Mary by her mother and father. It should say "the conception by Mary of Jesus", although that would have all kinds of other implications as, according to the belief, it was God who conceived Jesus, not actually Mary. To be correct syntactically and to be true to the story, I'd say "The miraculous conception of Jesus within Mary".
This is a very commonly misused active tense for the verb conception, but it becomes clear when you think of it from the point of view that "the conception of a person" refers to the point at which that person was called into existence.
I hate printers.
Female Sharks Can Reproduce Alone
So you've met my ex-wife?
Seriously, imagine the shark husbands; "That's not my pup. Who's the father???"
Or trying to explain this to your parents; "But Mom, I didn't. Really Mom."
And now the quotes, "A female shark needs a male shark, like a flounder needs a bicycle." - "All he's good for is opening jars and lifting heavy things." - "Not tonight, honey. I'm already stuffed."
In some ways, it would suck to be a male shark.
Best regards.
... the King of the Jaws?
A black hole is where God divided by 0
the sharks were conceived without sex-sin repent, all you fornicating sharks having babies out of wedlock!
And then, combined with a form of fusion, ...
This is OLD news! Everyone already knows that Hillary had Chelsea.