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Nuclear Scanning Catches a Radioactive Cat On I-5

Posted by kdawson on from the paging-dr.-schrodinger-line-4-please dept.

Jeff recommends Seattle Times columnist Danny Westneat's story from a community meeting with Northwest border control agents. Seems their monitoring for dirty bombs from the median of Interstate 5 caught a car transporting a radioactive cat. "It turns out the feds have been monitoring Interstate 5 for nuclear 'dirty bombs.' They do it with radiation detectors so sensitive it led to the following incident. 'Vehicle goes by at 70 miles per hour... Agent is in the median, a good 80 feet away from the traffic. Signal went off and identified an isotope [in the passing car]. The agent raced after the car, pulling it over not far from the monitoring spot.' Did he find a nuke? 'Turned out to be a cat with cancer that had undergone a radiological treatment three days earlier.'"

20 of 594 comments (clear)

  1. I know the name of its owner.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Schrodinger

    1. Re:I know the name of its owner.... by LaskoVortex · · Score: 5, Funny

      What was the cat's state?

      Washington--which is a quantum superposition between Oregon and Canada.

      --
      Just callin' it like I see it.
    2. Re:I know the name of its owner.... by piemcfly · · Score: 5, Funny

      wait, that was supposed to say

      'catatomic'

      ... and he ruins his own joke as usual.

    3. Re:I know the name of its owner.... by scubamage · · Score: 5, Funny

      Its state doesn't matter, because it changed when it was observed. My guess is either alive or dead.

  2. Lolcat by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Schrödinger cat is not amused

    1. Re:Lolcat by tubapro12 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Schrödinger's cat is not amused—maybe.
      There, I fixed that for you.
    2. Re:Lolcat by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      How about this?

  3. asking for a tag by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Please, please, please, somebody tag this catscan.

  4. Poor thing... by Katatsumuri · · Score: 5, Funny

    I heard it hated to be observed.

  5. Re:cool. by jx100 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Its purr could attract law enforcement officials.

  6. Re:Proper investigation by clarkkent09 · · Score: 5, Funny

    You never know with those feline terrorists.

    Perhaps it was a persian cat? You can never be too careful with those Al-Qaeda supporters

    --
    Negative moral value of force outweighs the positive value of good intentions.
  7. Re:Proper investigation by asliarun · · Score: 5, Funny

    I assume they promptly cut the cat open ...and it would have been quite safe as well. After all, the cat had 18 half-lives.
  8. Re:It's all fun and games... by dlanod · · Score: 5, Funny
    I can see the interrogation now...


    FBI goon: "What's the matter??? CAT GOT YOUR TONGUE?"

  9. Re:cool. by RuBLed · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'M DA BOMB! LAWL!!

    KTHXBAI

  10. Re:The thing that worries me is... by LaskoVortex · · Score: 5, Funny

    I do not want a hot cat sitting in my lap.

    Obviously a slashdotting geek to the very core. I'll take a hot pussy on my lap any day of the week.

    --
    Just callin' it like I see it.
  11. The man from the cat detector van. by Aussie · · Score: 5, Funny

    C: The man didn't have the right form.
    S: What man?
    C: The man from the cat detector van.
    S: The looney detector van, you mean.
    C: Look, it's people like you what cause unrest.
    S: What cat detector van?
    C: The cat detector van from the Ministry of Housinge.
    S: Housinge?
    C: It was spelt like that on the van (I'm very observant!). I never seen so
          many bleeding aerials. The man said that their equipment could pinpoint
          a purr at four hundred yards! And Eric, being such a happy cat, was a
          piece of cake.
    S: How much did you pay for this?
    C: Sixty quid, and eight for the fruit-bat.
    S: What fruit-bat?
    C: Eric the fruit-bat.
    S: Are all your pets called Eric?

  12. Re:cool. by Eponymous+Crowbar · · Score: 5, Funny

    We seem to be missing the real news here -- this has to be the first cat that can drive a car on the interstate, right?

  13. Excerpt from terrorist handbook by edwardpickman · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Feed cat Plutonium pellets with kibble. Wrap cat in detcord. Place timer on cat and set for five minutes. Release mouse on crowded street. Release cat after mouse. Run. Remember to face Mecca at 4:29 after you release cat." "Oh, don't forget to plug ears."

  14. Re:doesn't add up by tehdaemon · · Score: 5, Funny

    This is a story about Schrodinger's cat. This is exactly the kind of result you should expect.

    T

    --
    Laws are horrible moral guides, moral guides make even worse laws.
  15. Re:In Soviet Russia... by yanyan · · Score: 5, Funny

    i can haz cat scan?