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George Carlin Dead of Heart Failure
ashamanq was one of many who noted that comedian
George Carlin has died of heart failure. Most famous for his "Seven Words You Can Never Say On TV" routine which resulted in a landmark supreme court ruling, he was a true voice against censorship, and also one of the funniest men ever. He was 71.
I think he's up there now, smiling down at us.
He's just gone into the future to the time when the Wyld Stallyns music forms the basis of society.
speak for yourself buddy...
_I_ still appreciate tits.
Tits is now depreciated.
Only your mom's are.Oh shit you beat me to it motherfucker. Fuck. I am really pissed. Your mom is a cunt with big tits.
Oh yeah I almost forgot: Cocksucker!
Temperature at the airport is 73......which is stupid 'cause I don't know anyone that lives at the airport..."
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
Rat shit, bat shit, dirty old twat.
Sixty nine assholes tied in a knot.
Hooray, lizard shit, fuck!
There are two words, as George would tell you...
"You're fucked"
RIP George...
Probably due to George Carlin. He makes an argument for its depreciation in his routine."
"And tits shouldn't even be on the list..I mean, it sounds like a snack!!
New...Nabisco TITS!!
Cheese tits....onion tits....TATER Tits!!
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
> I have no more words for this.
I can think of 7
So who gets all his stuff?
Well fuck. Who's going to call everyone on their bullshit now?
And suddenly, Jon Stewart feels millions of expecting gazes turn towards him, as he mutters unto himself "Oh, fuck."Those who believe the Internet is private,
find their privates are on the Internet.
His airplane bit is a classic.
"I listen very carefully to the safety lecture, especially that part where they teach us how to use the seat belts. Imagine this, here we are, a plane full of grown human beings, many of us partially educated, and they're actually taking time out to describe the intricate workings of a belt buckle."
"'In the unlikely event of a water landing...', Well, what exactly is a water landing? Am I mistaken, or does this sound somewhat similar to crashing into the ocean?!"
"Which brings me to terminal - another unfortunate word to be used in association with air travel. And they use it all over the airport, don't they? Somehow I just can't get hungry at a place called the Terminal Snack bar. But, if you've ever eaten there, you know it IS an appropriate name."
The great thing about Carlin is that it's obvious when he goes overboard for comedy's sake, so his comedy about the obviously overboard is always relevant. Rest in peace, George.
http://www.policystew.com/
Here is a cookie.
"Action without philosophy is a lethal weapon; philosophy without action is worthless."
"Two minutes... get your shit together..."
May he rest in peace.
Proverbs 21:19
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.
I really like the new Nabisco Tits. They're my favorite snack.
No Justice. No Peace.
Keep it funny... here's another random quote: "If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted?"
--George Carlin
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
Guns don't kill people; Physics kills people! - John Lithgow as Dick Solomon on Third Rock From The Sun
-George Carlin, Life Is Worth Losing, Beacon Theater, HBO
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
"But I do mean that. I mean, I think the word fuck is an important word. It's the beginning of life, and, yet it's a word we use to hurt one other, quite often. And uh, people much wiser than I have said, I'd rather have my son watch a film with two people making love than two people trying to kill one other. And I of course agree. I wish I know who said it first, and I agree with that. But I would like to take it a step further. I would like to substitute the word fuck, for the word kill in all those movie cliches we grew up with.
'Okay Sheriff, we're gonna fuck ya now. But we're gonna fuck ya slow.'
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
Bet you can't have just one...
When you assume, you make an ass out of you and me!
What is GP?
God Bless you George! I guess Jesus needed someone "funny" for the 4th of July party in Heaven.
Depreciation: assets with finite lives lose value over time.
Deprecated: features that are superseded and should be avoided.
Q: What does an 80-year-old have between her tits that an 18-yer-old doesn't?
A: Her bellybutton.
Sounds to me like tits are assets with finite lives that lose their value over time ...
Well, you didn't cop out on the effort required for this post. As of yet, I've never come across such a very unique post on slashdot such as yours filled with truths and dispelling a few myths all in one submission. It was a healthy read but I read it all and will take it with me for the rest of my life. The proof is in the pudding as to whether other people will take heed of your words as well. Kudo to you my man. Might I suggest you don't watch television either, also don't you find it ironic that you're so well spoken and articulate considering it has been TV that has driven you to post.
Jonathanjk.com
Guns don't kill people; Physics kills people! - John Lithgow as Dick Solomon on Third Rock From The Sun
Bwahahahahaha.
Thanks George for all the laughs.
make sure to ask Jesus for the big porkchop.
They're using their grammar skills there.
I'm not claiming to have an insight line on the mind of George Carlin but it seems like he'd be the kind of person to announce his death a little early, just so he can stick around for all that follows. And if he didn't do this, he really should have. Nothing would be funnier than seeing his response to comments like "he must be up there now smiling down on us." "What the hell? Who the fuck are you to promote me to your vision of an afterlife just because I made you laugh? Let me tell you something, asshole: when I really do snuff it, if I find out I've got wings and a halo because you liked my seven dirty words routine, I'm coming back and cramming my harp right up your ass."
Kwisatz Haderach
Sell the spice to CHOAM
This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
"69 with two fingers up your ass"
Bat shit
Dirty old twat
69 assholes tied in a knot...
Hurray!!!! Lizard shit......FUCK Now, I know you people like to memorize these things so....
--George Carlin
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
I'm new wave, but I'm old school and my inner child is outward bound. I'm a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I'm interactive, I'm hyperactive and from time to time I'm radioactive.
Behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve, ridin the wave, dodgin the bullet and pushin the envelope. I'm on-point, on-task, on-message and off drugs. I've got no need for coke and speed. I've got no urge to binge and purge. I'm in-the-moment, on-the-edge, over-the-top and under-the-radar. A high-concept, low-profile, medium-range ballistic missionary. A street-wise smart bomb. A top-gun bottom feeder. I wear power ties, I tell power lies, I take power naps and run victory laps. I'm a totally ongoing big-foot, slam-dunk, rainmaker with a pro-active outreach. A raging workaholic. A working rageaholic. Out of rehab and in denial!
I've got a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a personal assistant and a personal agenda. You can't shut me up. You can't dumb me down because I'm tireless and I'm wireless, I'm an alpha male on beta-blockers.
I'm a non-believer and an over-achiever, laid-back but fashion-forward. Up-front, down-home, low-rent, high-maintenance. Super-sized, long-lasting, high-definition, fast-acting, oven-ready and built-to-last! I'm a hands-on, foot-loose, knee-jerk head case pretty maturely post-traumatic and I've got a love-child that sends me hate mail.
But, I'm feeling, I'm caring, I'm healing, I'm sharing-- a supportive, bonding, nurturing primary care-giver. My output is down, but my income is up. I took a short position on the long bond and my revenue stream has its own cash-flow. I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds and I watch trash sports! I'm gender specific, capital intensive, user-friendly and lactose intolerant.
I like rough sex. I like tough love. I use the "F" word in my emails and the software on my hard-drive is hardcore--no soft porn.
I bought a microwave at a mini-mall; I bought a mini-van at a mega-store. I eat fast-food in the slow lane. I'm toll-free, bite-sized, ready-to-wear and I come in all sizes. A fully-equipped, factory-authorized, hospital-tested, clinically-proven, scientifically- formulated medical miracle. I've been pre-wash, pre-cooked, pre-heated, pre-screened, pre-approved, pre-packaged, post-dated, freeze-dried, double-wrapped, vacuum-packed and, I have an unlimited broadband capacity.
I'm a rude dude, but I'm the real deal. Lean and mean! Cocked, locked and ready-to-rock. Rough, tough and hard to bluff. I take it slow, I go with the flow, I ride with the tide. I've got glide in my stride. Drivin and movin, sailin and spinin, jiving and groovin, wailin and winnin. I don't snooze, so I don't lose. I keep the pedal to the metal and the rubber on the road. I party hearty and lunch time is crunch time. I'm hangin in, there ain't no doubt and I'm hangin tough, over and out!"
--George Carlin
And now...he's gone.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
My approach to solving this problem would be to create an engineered language which is devoid of emotive terminology and multiple interpretations. Think 1984.
After this language existed, I would make it mandatory for all citizens to be educated in it, in the same way we currently mandate that citizens must learn math.
Then, I would isolate certain sectors of mass communication that must communicate using only this language. Such things as laws, advertising, political speech. For example, it should be impossible for a marketing person to use this language to make you buy a lemon because they convinced you it was "Sexy", or for a politician to make you vote for a bill you don't understand because it makes you "Patriotic".
I wouldn't make any efforts to squash other languages out of existence, but rather have them exist in parallel to the engineered language, leaving ample means for people to communicate with each other in an artistic and evocative fashion through appropriate channels.
After this was concluded, it would still be possible for individuals to break the rules given sufficient justification, but people would not have to wander the world constantly bombarded with propaganda in a systematic fashion the way they do now as though it was no big deal.
I could expand on this for hours on end, dealing with edge cases till the cows come home, but that's the general idea.
-1 Uncomfortable Truth