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Gates' Last Day At Microsoft
mrogers writes "Today is Bill Gates' last day as a full-time employee of Microsoft. After 33 years at the company, the one-time richest man in the world will be retiring at 52 to spend more time guiding the charitable Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. What would you buy him as a retirement gift?"
A shiny, new laptop loaded with Vista, of course. He's earned it!
Caveat Utilitor
(I mean, judging from Microsoft's product lines for the last twenty years, it's what he really wants...)
Please tell me they're giving him the high tech 'security walk'!
A 386SX with 640KB of memory.
"When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back!" -- Cave Johnson
An account on Slashdot. But no trolling, please.
alias possession='chmod 666 satan && ls
A donation has been made in his name to the Human Fund.
If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else.
But it's so much fun to watch him run Microsoft into the ground. Don't take that away!
$25 gift card to Applebees.
"... that runs Windows ..." ... ME. Enjoy your watch, Bill!
Upgrade the pain! Make it run Vista... All the gore of WinME with the added pain of UAC!
"You are trying to check the time, Allow or Deny?"
Of course, you'd need to upgrade the graphics card and memory in the watch. Oh, let's not forget more storage space. And it'll probably need a faster processor. ... Maybe a sundial is easier...
XenoPhage
Technological Musings
...did security walk him to the door after his exit interview?
This is my sig. There are many like it but this one is mine.
Odd, looking at the brown Zune I could have sworn it was a number two.
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Better yet: a 30 foot tall armour plated robot penguin that launches high explosive packed herrings while shrieking "DON'T FEAR ME!!!!" through a 10,000 watt speaker system, programmed to seek and destroy.
Seems fair...
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Without that low cost of hardware Linux would not have taken off, and its extremely unlikely that as many people would have computers, internet access and slashdot accounts with which to slag off Microsoft.
So I would have had a 4-digit UID? Damn it Bill Gates!
Thank God for evolution.
So Bill Gates has been held hostage at chair point.
If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
Things became so bitter that, on one occasion, Gates stormed out of a meeting in a huff after a shouting match in which Mr. Ballmer jumped to the defense of several colleagues, according to an individual present at the time. After the exchange, Mr. Ballmer seemed "remorseful," the person said.
Really makes you think - what happens behind the closed doors?
Ballmer: We will create a monopoly. The next version of Windows will not run any non-Microsoft software! Muwahahaha!
Gates: But that is wrong! That destroys the market!
Ballmer: What did you say to me boy!?
Gates: B-B-But that'll lower the quality of our product. W-W-We need to take care of our customers!
Ballmer: *narrows eyes* You've been reading Slashdot, haven't you boy?
Gates: N-No!
Ballmer: Don't make me use the chair on you...Have you forgotten all I've taught you?
GateS:N-No!
Ballmer: Then tell me, what matters?!
Gates: Developers?
Ballmer: Indeed. Now run along now. And if I hear any of this nonsense again, I bring out the chair.
~Jarik