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Hubble Finds Unidentified Object In Space
Gizmodo is reporting that the Hubble space telescope has found a new unidentified object in the middle of nowhere. Some are even suggesting that this could be a new class of object. Of course, without actually understanding more about it, the speculation seems a bit wild. "The object also appeared out of nowhere. It just wasn't there before. In fact, they don't even know where it is exactly located because it didn't behave like anything they know. Apparently, it can't be closer than 130 light-years but it can be as far as 11 billion light-years away. It's not in any known galaxy either. And they have ruled out a supernova too. It's something that they have never encountered before. In other words: they don't have a single clue about where or what the heck this thing is."
That's no moon!
FTA-
"Apparently, a scientist at the LHC declared that the object is similar to the flash that an Imperial Star Destroyer does when reaching Warp 10.
It could be worse, it could be Monday.
... it's a Bowl of Petunias, or a sperm whale (again).
Maybe they should try cleaning off the lens?
One shows a million degrees. The others, minus five thousand.
It's obvious that this was the flash of an extraterrestrial civilization that just destroyed itself when it realized that all of its savings were tied up in Lehman Brothers stock.
This is my sig.
Two and a half millennia ago, the artifact appeared in a remote corner of space, beside a trillion-year old dying sun from a different universe. It was a perfect black body sphere and it did nothing. Then it disappeared. Now it is back.
No kidding!!! What do you say at this point?
Did I leave my keys out in space again? I keep doing that. Sorry.
For those of you who have seen the movie the fifth element be scared, be very scared.
shame hubble doesnt have windshield wipers
Contrary to popular belief, Unix is user friendly. It just happens to be particular about who it makes friends with.
...that dam' kid down the block with his laser pointer again!
Chaos maximizes locally around me.
Mike broke the Hubble! Mike broke the Hubble!
It's a gigantic sphere of single socks, nonworking ball point pens, car keys, reading glasses, coffee mugs....
Well, they have to go somewhere....
it must be the flying spaghetti monster!
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say it's a rock.
When god is a bit more impressive than 21st magnitude, let me know.
It's the Borg! I'm selling my Lehman stock now!
what is wrong with you people?
we all know deep in our hearts it is the decepticons
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
I'm picturing a staff meeting at Engadget where the editor is yelling, "If Gizmodo beats us to press with a previously unknown class of celestial object one more time, heads are gonna roll around here!"
It's the Universe's backup of itself. It would store it offsite, but it's kinda hard when everywhere is here.
UTF-8: There and Back Again
a scientist at the LHC declared
LHC scientists then assured the public that it was not an LHC being used on a different planet by an alien civilization, then being burned in a fierce flash of particle fusion before being enveloped within a subsequent black hole. "The chances would be like winning the lottery ten times in a row" they said. "Not that we would know about any alien civilizations, their freaky purple skin and glowing eyes, or whether they were using an LHC modelled after the one we made on Earth. Speaking of which, I'm not really qualified to talk about it, because this is astronomy and has NOTHING to do with LHCs... Ha ha right? No more questions."
Next week, a new LHC song is promised from the CERN labs and should be another smash hit on Youtube. One of the scientists sung a few of the lines to us as a preview. "We didn't share our technology with a now-extinct alien race less than a few lightyears away. They were probably pretty dumb and annoying anyway. Let's turn this bugger on! Let's turn this bugger on! Smash some particles, yeah!"
I am the richest astronaut ever to win the superbowl.
Could be the next Gates/Seinfeld ad?
Maybe it's another Alien civilization that just annihilated itself in nuclear\fusion\antimatter\something hellfire?
I'm just going to go ahead and assume it's a Cylon base ship jumping around.
hahahahaa!!... Oh wait, you were serious...
That's what happened the last time a civilization constructed a 14 TeV large hadron collider! I need some protection. Where's my tinfoil hat!
Or perhaps find a link to the actual paper in question. I agree that funny all to often dominates what would otherwise be an interesting discussion forum.
Looks like some other civilization just turned on their new LHC too.
No, I looked at the photos and it is clearly a Death Star being constructed out there.
At 11 billion light years out, he would have had to lose his personality well into his late 20's.
I SO wanted to mod this funny.
... its dimensions are 1 by 4 by 9
When his defense asked, "Which computer has Jon Johansen trespassed upon?" the answer was: "His own."
it starts to get a bit old
Impatient much? Nobody has even chimed in yet with any Soviet Russia memes or Uranus jokes.
If libertarians are so opposed to effective government, why don't they all move to Somalia?
It was Major Carter, exploding another star.
Once you blow up one star, they expect everything from you.
Fight Spammers!
Where is Korben Dallas when you need him?
"Well Ranger Brad, I'm a scientist. I don't believe in anything." - Dr. Roger Fleming
Maybe it's the server of the site after getting /.'ed
I am Bennett Haselton! I am Bennett Haselton!
I have to wonder if this wasn't a large matter/antimatter event.
That's optimistic. I have to wonder if they found the Higgs boson.
Dewey, what part of this looks like authorities should be involved?
Correction, its an alien civilization that just did their first experiment on the LHC.
GUYS! It's the *INSERT "random ultra-geeky sci-fi reference that may or may not have been mentioned a thousand times in comments above" HERE* !!! good thing about that *INSERT "obligatory unfunny reference to the recent Lehman bankruptcy protection announcement" HERE*!!! ROFLCOPTR!
my money would be on a Vogon Construction crew
Gamma Globula V just ran their first particle collision. Will we learn from their mistake?
I love my sig.
...it's a dyson sphere.
No kidding. I read the summary on the /. front page and thought to myself, "Wow, how boring. Don't think I'll be hitting that article." Then shortly thereafter, "Wait, did they say wild speculation?!" Here I am...
Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
The funny's just filling the void that would otherwise be filled with the chirping of crickets.
Please tell me more about these space crickets when you get a chance.
This guy's the limit!
Where did CERN go???
Exactly! NASA obviously needs to do a better job of keeping the lense clean. :-P
Those darn Water Bears are already causing havoc.
you mean the ones that blew themselves up?
"Some things have to be believed to be seen." - Ralph Hodgson
Dammit, God, stop putting your compact discs in the microwave!
Correction number 2:
It's the anti-earth where some anti-men did a LHC experiment at anti-switzerland.
It happens pretty regularly, go through and we should be able to ask the Arilou what the hell they have been doing to Earth all this time.
XML is like violence. If it doesn't solve the problem, use more.
OK, I'll bite. It's obviously a small Klingon that's been orbiting Uranus for the past 6 months.
lots of.. lots of, baby...
bickerdyke
Think of Slashdot as a bar you go to at work.
Slashdot is no place for manual-reading freaks like you!
Strange things are afoot at the Circle-K.
At long last the game has been released, but due to a mix-up in the marketing department it was accidentally released in the wrong galaxy.
Cheers! Now where's all that free beer I've been hearing about?
Before commenting on the Bible, please read it first
It's Russel's teapot.
The shadowy figure waves back at you!
Liar. Antiswitzerland couldn't have a budget for fundamental research - all their money would be spent supporting their enormous military in aggressive wars.
Why don't we just rename slashdot.org to BADsciencejokes.org???
Especially their enormous fleet.
It was actually our own LHC, but in 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes and 12 seconds!
That was Alan Shepard's golf ball. Apollo 14.
Don't underestimate the power of The Source
Arms salesman: "This is our new anti-matter bomb, it can blow up half the planet"
Dictator: "Just what I was looking for, I'll take two!"
Appologies to Billy Connelly.
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage? - Pink Floyd.
I foresee a slight problem with developing a hand-grenade that has a 2km blast radius...
"I've got more toys than Teruhisa Kitahara."
You mean their SHAB, the Small Hadron Apart Breaker.
Especially their enormous fleet.
Well, yeah. After all, Antiswitzerland would be a low-lying island.