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Slashdot's Disagree Mail
This guy seems to be a little upset that the bottom has fallen out of the criminal mind-reading market. Luckily he seems to have made up for it by predicting earthquakes on the side.
On Mon Sep 8, 2003 ********* wrote:
"I am on two projects, actually the telepathy work went dormant when I found the demand sluggish although a trained reader might avoid some of what criminals want. Violence and sex can be read as images.Quake forecasts are useful to survive and this is where the activity is going in. Neither project is quite what other people are into as discussion. Indeed the tenor of both activities is observation observation observation. Mistakes in either area kill people. Warnings are of course not what people want. Quakes can be planned around. Finding oneself in an elevator with a serial killer might demand a skilled avoidance. There is a risk I will learn something else from a more informed person in your site. What a bore to load on more stuff people will want me to shut up about, but maybe sneaky tips to survive can help me to suffer longer."
This guy is part of your standard tinfoil-hat crowd. I appreciate that my response back is what will determine if free speech lives or dies.
On Thu, 09 Dec 2004 ****** wrote:
"hi there Just trying to shed some light on your troubles with new laws. I believe thatALL governments have found a "legal" loophole to create new "laws" and that is making every person ie man woman and child a corporation or SLAVE. How can they do that ? by simply having you identify yourself willingly as such. Look at your issued drivers license and such if your name is all in CAPITALS you are no longer entitled to the human rights or even your inalienable rights ( God given rights )If you do not believe me check your birth certificate some may find their name in upper and lower(capital an small letters) if this is so then try to get your drivers license changed to your Proper name designating you a man ( free man ) or woman.Check the Magna Carta of 1215 these rights and priveledges are forever and if they have been removed then you cannot trust any other laws as these came straight from the King at that time and if he can lie to you what chance do you have of getting any support from anyone else? I believe we need laws and a way to enforce them but when human rights are being violated then Everyone has a voice and has to use it. He who does not stand up and fight for liberty and freedom deserves neither liberty or freedom. If no reply I will acceptall freedom is gone."
Finally we have this man, who shows us why you should never mix "The Matrix," a sociology book, and anti-psychotic medication.
On Thu, 27 Jun 2002 ******* wrote:
"There is something extremely wrong with every single person in this world. They seem to be part of a pointless simulation.
"The Matrix" has portrayed this idea somewhat, yet we watch it and go back to our daily lives. Yet in this very life, underneath the seeming diversity in people's opinions, values, talents, and interests, there is something that makes everyone the same. It is as though this planet is populated only by mindless fakes, objects that provide the appearance of intellect on the surface but are based on only mechanical reflexes and primitive thought patterns.
I don't really care if anything I say has been said before, if it was portrayed in movies, in books, or in the lyrics of some useless song. With 6 billion people covering the globe at any given time, thousands and thousands of years of written literature, probability dictates almost any combination of words has occurred numerous times. Yet there is clear evidence there was no action, so those words, just like the people who spoke them, must have been just more fakes. I am forced to use this language (also created by the fakes) because there is no alternative, so everything I write here could be misunderstood to make me sound like one of them, but it will be the action that I take and the dedication that will separate me from them.
In my estimation the fakes that occupy this planet don't make up 99%, but more like 99.9999999% of the population. I know this because I've searched, and in my search have so far only found one true ally (I have found him via the internet as well). But even with those numbers we would not give up because there is no logic in giving up.
The people on this planet are all fakes because the societies have made them this way. Ideas that populate people's minds have no logic or purpose. Concepts such as religion, god, morality, individualism, freedom, identity, happiness, love and billions of others are all just memes. Like parasites they infect the minds and spread from one person to the next. They have no point or purpose; they exist without any logical basis or foundation. The fakes are completely controlled by them, and they will never see beyond them. To not be controlled by them one must do more then just realize that they exist. One must resist any ideas that have no point, endlessly question, and never accept imperfection or compromise in any answer.
We (myself and my ally) are different though. While we have had the limitation of existing only in these societies, something has made it possible for us to resist being indoctrinated into becoming one of those fakes. We have no arbitrary wants, needs, desires, or preferences.
If this world continues to exist the way it is then nothing in it will ever have a point. It will always be just a product of random evolution, one with no importance or relevance. The only logical goal is to dedicate our lives to increasing our numbers, those that aren't fakes, so that in thousands of years our numbers may be such that the fakes would no longer be a threat to progress.
Those that join us must see every other person occupying this planet as the enemy, and us as their only allies. Like us they must have dedication only to taking the most logical action, and to nothing else.
To tell you more about us, we've posted some personal information about ourselves on a website. You'll also find past responses to us on that webpage.
Obviously anyone reading this email is most likely just another fake. Do not simply reply to this email, if you do your message will almost certainly be ignored. If you do wish to communicate, first demonstrate your interest by taking the effort to find us online, one of the ways to do that is described below.
Use a major search engine to search for every combination of any two words from the list below. The order of the words shouldn't matter as long as you do not search for them in quotes. Also when you pick the right combination you shouldn't need to look at more then the first matches.
There is no trick to this and this isn't meant to be quick, it should, however, be fairly clear if/when you find the right site. The following search engines were verified by us, please use any of them as other search engines may simply not list us correctly: MSN, Lycos, InfoSeek, FastSearch, LookSmart, HotBot, InfoSpace, Ask.com, AllTheWeb, Teoma, WebCrawler, AltaVista.
perfect
theory
endless
eternal
desire
ambition
driving
perpetual
idea
logical
infinite
dream
final
best
escape
objective
thought
only
logic
clue
If this can't be solved, or if you never reach us, there should be no reason for you to give up as we will never give up and thus there will always be some way to find us."
After having read this particular disagree mail postings, I feel dumber, as if those particular mail messages has a magic spell of IQ Sucking attached to them. Must get...brain...out of here...
Bearded Dragon
Who else checked their names on their drivers licenses after reading, just out of curiosity?
FWIW, every word on my NY license is in capitals - does that mean the entire state is enslaved (including the DMV itself)?
Damn_registrars has no butt-hole. Damn_registrars has no use for a butt-hole.
This guy got the same email as well.
So did a bunch of other people.
"What a bore to load on more stuff people will want me to shut up about..." Can someone please mod that up as insightful?
I'm always positive; it's my nature.
Frankly, I find it a bit discouraging that making light of maladjusted individuals seems to rank fairly high on so many people's list of acceptable pastimes. It's quite cruel. Of course, the irony is that those who laugh loudest are themselves quite maladjusted, otherwise they'd know better. It's a fact that we live in overwhelming times, so there are many overwhelmed people. This is more sad than entertaining.
Caveat Utilitor
http://www.eternalambition.com/ is no more! Dooom! Doooom! All is lost!
Why is this thus? What is the reason for this thusness?
... I'm sure I saw a piece of wood that looked like the bottom of a barrel around here, but now there's just all these shavings.
On last Disagree Mail article I mentioned that the reason people didn't like Idle was probably because they were disappointed with the "out there" factor that one would expect from 10 years of running Slashdot.
Although they erode my faith in humanity a little bit, these are much better and actually made me laugh.
Web2.0: I love when people Flickr my cuil and digg my boingboing until my google is reddit and I start to yahoo
>>> we would not give up because there is no logic in giving up.
*Somebody* needs to take the Voight-Kampff test. 'Sure sounds like something an android would say!
(Sorry, just finished a short obsession with blade runner)
There's no arguing that point, and if the majority of postings and tags that follow any Disagree Mail submissions are of any indication, it would seem as though most of the /. crowd would agree.
/. is far from well-adjusted. So where does that leave us?
But
Previous installments of Disagree Mail actually were from people personally contacting Slashdot to complain, and some were quite funny.
These emails are just text used to get spam past Bayesian filters so that an image with the real message can get through. Yes, I realize that the spammers often forget the image, I guess those messages are just "will it bounce" probes.
Good job samzenpus for proving to the aforementioned spammers that not only is your email valid, but you read everything, even the obvious spams that aren't targeted directly at yourself.
retrorocket.o not found, launch anyway?
Writing things in all capitol letters 1) force you to slow down when reading things, 2) make it harder to confuse certain letters (1, l and I, rn and m, etc), and 3) do not make you a slave. Well, I'm just guessing on that last one. Maybe my tinfoil hat is tarnished?
Samzenpus sends his regrets, he hit submit to early and forgot to add the fourth entry to his post. Lucky for us, he managed to repost the original in the form of the parent, the fourth and most deranged poster of disagree mail.
MMO Quests are like orgasms:
You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.
These sound like normal slashdot posts to me. You can't really distinguish them from a typical thread.
How about a moderation of -1 pedantic.
It's a thief in the night to come and grab you
It can creep up inside you and consume you
A disease of the mind it can control you
It's too close for comfort
It all starts with slashdot and the messages filter out from there. We must all follow them. MUST!!!!! Pay attention!!!!!!
Hasn't anyone seen what THEY do to people? What is wrong with you people?????
Non-Sequitors rule my life I am doomed doomed because all I see is dots, slashes, and messages. Little tiny bits of information but if YOU PAY attention you may learn the true message. THEY ARE WATCHING. Someone must watch the watchers.
Sorry just had to post some garbage that would correspond to the parent. What is this? Is this really Slashdot? I mean wtf?
-AC
Uhm...wow. I think this is an attempt at some sort of BRAIN VIRUS...
Lewis Black says the reason we only use 6% of our brains is that the rest sits around waiting to figure out the meaning of stupid things people say. (He also says that figuring out these stupid things people say is what causes aneurysms...)
Yeah, now I can believe it. This is some sort of weaponized STUPID.
I imagine the trick was balancing the stupid so you read it all the way through...
Friend: "The NIC is misconfigured..." Me: "No prob, I'll just telnet in and fix it." *Silence*
In the last email, about finding that web site, the sender tells us to search for each possible combination of two words out of a list of 20. That's (20*21)/2=210 possible combinations. Yeah, that's definitely not going to be quick.
Maybe I'll write up a quick Perl script to get the 210 first results from one of those major search engines, and scan through to see...
Yeah, I just lost interest. Not worth it. I must be a fake.
Then maybe this will make you laugh:
http://www.explosm.net/comics/1398/
The only logical goal is to dedicate our lives to increasing our numbers, those that aren't fakes, so that in thousands of years our numbers may be such that the fakes would no longer be a threat to progress.
That doesn't make any sense. "Progress" is itself an arbitrary goal; there is no logical reason to pursue progress. Guess he's just another fake, after all.
Stop! Dremel time!
A cat is no trade for integrity.
Student: Is it true that the foundation of the universe is paradox?
Master: Well, yes and no.
So how much longer is it going to take until idle gets declared a failed experiment?
Or at least removed from the goddamn RSS feed?
I'm so very happy
The day is Disagree Mail
Big fat mailman dance
With my Disagree Mail
All ugly no brain fool
Hate my Disagree Mail
I feed them to the cat
To get my Disagree Mail
Feed me - feed me more
I need Disagree Mail
Hovering in darkness
With my Disagree Mail
You Disagree - I kill you
For my Disagree Mail
Stupid no-sex nerds
Hate my Disagree Mail
So for true all love I have
Stay with Disagree Mail
Wait I do another week
For more Disagree Mail
Wait alone I will I will
For lovely Disagree Mail
The last email is seriously old news; it's been circulating since at least 2002: see here and here.
@yg
I changed my name legally to a combination of the peace symbol and the symbol for radiation. Thus I have no upper case version and thus cannot be enslaved. Ha hahahahaha.
That one was great :D :D :D. Laughed out loud right at my desk... oh well... I guess everyone knows I'm slacking off now...
It sucks.
Do you mean to tell us you're not getting freaky hate mails every week? These emails are from over 4 years ago.
You do not have free will, so I am going to take your wallet. I love determinists.
aww man, http://www.eternalambition.com is gone now... /me jumps out of a window
I don't know about you guys, but from here on out I'm going to have a tough time not making the lives of clueless noobs who post in ALL CAPS on forums a living hell now that I have the idea that they might work at the DMV in the back of my mind.
Wanna fight ? Bend over, stick your head up your ass, and fight for air.
"Things an android would say" I think was a category on $25,000 Pyramid at one time. I vaguely recall Brent Spiner being a guest contestant on it.
100% width? italicized blockquotes? white-on-green text? I've never thought of anything as genuinely "user-abusive" before, but this is getting there.
I keep reading disagree mail hoping for something worth reading and instead I waste N minutes of life I'll never get back. Then, next time, I do it again...
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/9F14.html
A cupcake is connected to the mild electrical
current. There's even a sign that says, "Do not touch." Bart
sees the cupcake. Bart sees the sign. He tosses it aside and goes
for the cupcake. He gets shocked. Imitating Moe (not the bartender)
"Wiseguy, eh?". He tries again, and slaps himself like Curly. He
tries once more. "Ow." Again. "Ow." Again. "Ow." Lisa once again
takes score. "Hamster 2, Bart 0"
Why the horrible text/background color combination? Still??
Over on TechRepublic, these people call themselves BALTHOR
The first two are certifiably mentally ill. Probably delusional schizophrenia for #1 and good old paranoid schizophrenia for #2. #3 may or may not have narcissistic personality disorder, which can be dangerous (i.e. VT shooter).
Let's not have too much fun at their expense.
If I want to read trap, I can always go to the reg. I like slashdot because they enable me to discuss things with a relatively intelligent base. There are enough sites for me to have a laugh at idiots already, let's kill this stuff.
Actually, even these posts are too intelligent to be marked as truly idiotic. So there is even little fun for over the top antics.
I want whatever drugs they are having! They seem pretty zippy!
Wow, just wow. I can't believe people actually write this stuff to you. I hope they don't go shooting up a school or something because mommy teased them with the nipple...
I get the sneaking suspicion that these aren't even directed towards Slashdot. It looks like some random spam that floods everyone's inbox.
--
Luck is just skill you didn't know you had.
We are the borg, you will be assimilated, resistance is futile.
Or, better yet.
Is there an anti-borg? You will be un-assimilated, resistance is preferable?
Maybe it's the paranoia I got from merely reading these, but... some of them truly look like coded messages.
;). Maybe it's a test to see if you're a true member of the Knights Templar or something. If you were, you would know how to decode them.
Take the first one for example. The words and sentences kinda work together and kinda make coherent thoughts. But they could also be explained as obfuscation around a buried coded message.
Not that I can come up with a reason why those coded messages are being directed at you. I would think they would be posted publicly so that the recipient could find them (though that did happen in the end, didn't it?
Yeahhh... that's it. Definitely!
Crazy or no, anyone who rails against leaving the caps lock key down is okay in my book.
Ceci n'est pas une sig.
http://www.weeklyuniverse.com/2002/matrix.htm
~A~
The "ally" that the author of the last e-mail mentioned was just discovered. It was an AI all along. (That's what you get for trusting someone you met on the internet.)
Turing isn't sure what to make of this... does it count if the judge was a crackpot?
Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
Just give me that third guys email, already. You fakes!
So did anyone find the non-fakes? ROFL, post link please if you did.
Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it.
The first one looks like the output of a Markov chain...
Still not funny or worth my time.
In turn, I will waste your time with this post, slashdot!
Silly. Everyone knows that caps lock is cruise control for "cool."
Why do I M2 everything negatively?
Shut up you all... the Disagree Mail section's not too bad ;)
The man is right! We are all part of the simulation. 42 is the answer and we have to find the question before the Vogons get here.
Boring. I get to read the messages to the webmaster account for a US government agency that receives a good amount of traffic and attracts millions of unique users over the course of a couple of months; these types of messages are run of the mill... many of ours are much more inventive and creative - certainly more entertaining than this stuff. Slashdot, if this is the best of the bunch, fringe ./ readers are not very creative.
The Caps Lock key was given to us by aliens. Double lock that hat of yours. ;)
Just going to add some variables to the equation:
You should never mix X + a sociology book + Y.
There, fixed it.
Slashdot "libertarians": Small government for me, big government for those I disagree with. -1, I disagree with you
spelling errors slow me down even more.
Stop stop stop.
If this is all the quotable email you have after a decade, you really should know that it's time to stop.
I know most Slashdot visitors are glorified line-workers, trained to do fairly exact and specific tasks, but if you'd make your reading list more varied than _Web 2.0 For Bright People_ and _Star Trek: The Pulp Generation_ you might realise that there are many questions science has come nowhere near touching.
.
(1) Science relies on a certain trust of the senses, which means fundamental questions about senses and memory are the realm of philosophy. Just because a hypothesis isn't obviously falsifiable, it doesn't mean that it posits something false. It is a very primitive man who only feels a question is valid if he knows it can be answered;
.
(2) Tied in with this, science's answers are finite: if you were to ask "why?" of anything observed ad inf., progressively obtaining more fundamental answers, science would eventually have nothing to say, no matter how far it had advanced. So, it's not that science is incomplete through lack of progress, it's that science must be incomplete by its very nature;
.
(4) Meanwhile, the study of aggregate human behaviour - sociology - and "soft sciences" in general are really begging for a more strict application of scientific method. To throw nerds something they might vaguely relate to, consider Asimov's conception of a mathematical discipline which was able to predict the large scale behaviour of any group of humans. Consider debates on free will from quantum uncertainty vs. macroscopic predictability of interactions.
.
I'd agree with the unnecessarily mocked submitter that human behaviour is, when contrasted with all things that humans are physically capable of doing, pretty much the same across the board, and I acknowledge the list he's provided of fairly universal human drives. I'd also agree that few people step back and contemplate them, instead allowing themselves to be driven by them, so someone isolated on the Internet might think that he has found only one special person who shares his viewpoint. When the submitter implies some sort of duty to procreate to produce more people who are like him, he is of course being very human - "reproduce to leave a legacy of qualities like mine". It is a miserable existence to constantly try to deny one's own nature, but it may also be very stifling for some minds to have to accept it.
.
Oh, and Jews did 9/11, AIDS is a punishment for homosexuals, the Catholic church comprises only tax-collectors and paedophiles, if you stare at a mirror at 4am for 10 minutes your eyes start glowing red, and (3) was removed due to Masonic conspiracy.
I believe the Matrix he refers to is the Movie with Keannu Reeves and not the Sociology book.
- A Frog in a pond utters an azure cry. -
i can't even be bothered logging in for this. disagreemail is pretty crap. i know, i know, i get really tempted on my own sites to post the irrellevant and shit email i get, and sometimes i do but really .. you're scraping barrells here.
le sigh.
"Concepts such as religion, god, morality, individualism, freedom, identity, happiness, love and billions of others are all just memes."
Think about this: what do you get when you remove, avoid or even imitate these kinds of illogical concepts? That's right, you get emotionless and predictable robots. Fakes. Therefore, please don't explain the unexplainable or illogical as some sort of thought-controlling device.
(I wonder if this will even be read by the guy who sent that mail... Probably not.)
I am not devoid of humor.
Point 1 and 2 kind of contradict eachother - with the mixing of one's, e1s and i's you're actually forced to slow down reading. :P
I am not devoid of humor.
Because the only person who could be harmed by the joke, will never get the joke. You have to get a joke to be harmed by it -- QED.
Here is the Website of the conspiracy guys :
http://web.archive.org/web/20030328062926/http://eternalambition.com/
Found thanks to this site : http://www.elsewhere.org/journal/archives/2002/06/30/eternal-ambition/
I knew that last one sounded familiar as I read it! I got that e-mail too back in 2002. Clearly it was spam that filters couldn't detect. I remember being so entertained that I had to forward it to my roommate. The site wasn't as hard to find as it sounds.
To them these fears are real, and permeate their interactions with everyone, not just /.
They get ridiculed and ostracized, which only justifies their fears and makes it that much harder for them to seek (or get) help.
Posting their rantings is akin to laughing at the one-legged guy struggling with his prosthesis at the supermarket.
J
This is Slashdot, not 4chan. It will never be 4chan. Keep that shit out of me /dot/!
What day is it? Could you please tell me?
Ok, so since my letter didn't make it, I'm ok.........lol Some things just shouldn't be said out loud.
trying to steal my magna carta rights....
Good people go to bed earlier.
you know, it seems to me that ever since the Sudo make me a sandwich
(seriously, he fools you into thinking he's making observation, and sneaks a command in there....i was almost lulled into using my voice by the strange rhythm of the words...)
not only is time travel possible, it's irrelevant.
I'm pretty sure that statement was around a long time before 4chan. Just because they pick it up doesn't mean they invented it.
And aside from that, as is said in Enemy Mine, Truth is Truth.
Why do I M2 everything negatively?