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The Wackiest Technology Tales of 2008
coondoggie writes "Despite the daily drumbeat of new and improved hardware or software, the tech industry isn't all bits and bytes. Some interesting things happen along the way too. Like floating data centers, space geekonauts, shape shifting robots and weird bedfellows (like Microsoft and Jerry Seinfeld). What we include here is an example of what we thought were the best,
slightly off-center stories of 2008."
This sounded interesting.. but just really didn't hold my attention. Most of the stuff fell under one of two categories:
1) stuff which is cool, but that I already knew about ..
2) stuff which wasn't really all that interesting
Additionally the little blurb of info the give on each was fairly dry .. .. and they have (at least for my browser) added some annoying anti-"just view the print version" stuff..
AND GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN!
I tried to RTFA and found that the article was nothing but a stupid slide show with a vapid paragraph of comment for each. Unless there's a link to the complete text, there really isn't anything worth looking at.
Good, inexpensive web hosting
Really, do they need so much capacity that they have to resort to the ocean?
Water has an incredible Specific Heat Capacity. Just as a quick guess, the idea would be to use the water as a giant heatsink.
There isn't anything relevant or newsworthy in the entire piece that was the subject of this post.
The 'article' is merely a slide-show with some of the most poorly written reporting I have ever encountered. News today is usually infotainment and not information anymore and this is a prime example. Even entries to this piece that should be newsworthy are presented so awfully that I could barely muster the willpower to proceed to the last slide.
Networkworld.com ... never visiting this website again.
Would get bored with the article.
Even the slides were boring.
If I had an Ass, I'd call it Fanny Bottom, then I could slap my Ass; Fanny Bottom, on the Arse.
Idle
I had this (jpg image of my bios) displayed after a hardware failure. "Hard Dick Mode - Enhanced". I ROFL'D heavily, it was even better than the server msg "There has been an error, the error was sucess!"
FYI m200 tablet with nvidia chip, The graphics had some lines in it, and the factory driver would bsod.
These tech stories are as wacky as those ads by Microsoft featuring Jerry Seinfeld.
Might as well talk about Vegetarian Vampires, African-American KKK members, Atheist Christian Pastors, or Dotcom CEOS worth billions who still live in their Mom's basement. It just makes about as much sense as this story.
Remember, Slashdot does not have a -1 disagree moderation, and no, troll, flamebait, and overrated are not substitutes.
So, as a suggestion, because it looks like people are going to complain about the article, why not shift the direction of the comments to user stories of their own wacky technology tales?
No, I be new here!
I got some bad grammar
to start there sentences.
You're thinking small. Why miniaturize the laser, when we could instead enlarge the sharks? -John Searle
You're not a patch on the real New Here. That guy's posted exactly the same comment (and subject) over 200 times in the last 5 years.
You've done it.... twice. And you couldn't even maintain consistency for those two comments.
Pah, imposter I say. (I won't even get started on your grammar.
There are shills on slashdot. Apparently, I'm one of them.
not 'there'.
Anyone caught submitting slide shows featuring minimal content smeared over 43 colorful but vapid pages should be punished. I recommend death by stoning, preferably using a truckload of rusty 486s and a pallet or two of 14" monitors instead of boulders. As for the clever soul who deemed the content on the front page, I can only assume he/she/it is blind and suffering the after-effects of a decades-old untreated case of syphilis.
No. Wait. This must be a sign that slashdot has been secretly acquired by Condé Nast. I anxiously await the premiere issue of Linux Vogue. Sigh.
While discussing the Bill Gates/Jerry Seinfeld ad spots Microsoft ran a few months back, we chanced upon perhaps the real thinking behind it. . .
Universally hailed as a magnificent failure, we wondered exactly how with Microsoft using all the expertise of the P.R. giant, Waggener Edstrom, and the quarter-billion dollars spent on the project, such a thing could be possible. How could, with those kinds of resources, anybody achieve such a catastrophic P.R. failure?
Then we realized, "No. It wasn't a failure at all. It was a brilliant success!"
Here's the logic:
After the self-destruction of Vista, Microsoft was in free fall. Investors were mightily distressed at Balmer's ineptitude. And so, as happens when huge corporations are desperate, they went to Waggener Edstrom for a rescue plan.
The P.R. firm sat down and worked out the psychology and set up the following three act show: Act I involved subtle media manipulation presenting Balmer as the idiot he is, the weak link responsible for Vista's failure. This has been accomplished.
Act II involved running a bunch of ads which were designed to do two things:
1. Make sure that people knew that Gates was still involved with Microsoft; that he'd gone walkabout, but was still there in the wings.
2. Show Gates being a hopeless geek. --He was portrayed as an awkward fool who couldn't act and had no screen presence. The whole series left you feeling painfully embarrassed and despite yourself, kind of sorry for him. --Think about that! When EVER has the world felt sorry for Bill Gates? But investors don't want him to be a charismatic actor. They want him to be a hopeless geek/genius who will rescue their share values.
Now, act III involves the placement of the upcoming Windows 7 in the public conscious, which, surprise, surprise, is getting lots of positive response and sympathy, general good-will and a collective hope that it won't suck. (At least from the general population; Slashdotters are a breed apart.)
Not a bad bit of P.R. work. Sneaky and manipulative, playing on those hidden aspects of the human mind to achieve its objectives. That's why Microsoft pays Waggener Edstrom 250 million dollars a year. The most powerful advertising happens when you think it isn't working.
-FL
slide 1, slide2, slidzzzzzzzz... zzz sn..gfffhk muh? wuh? good thing I needed a sleep anyway
1. "conscious" is an adjective. Perhaps you mean "conscience".
Ha ha. Right you are! --The funny part is that I had it right in my first draft but switched it around on a sleepy whim because I mixed it up with the idea of Pinocchio's cricket, which just sounded weird.
2. I do not see a logical connection between "acts I and II" and "act III". My understanding is that Windows Vista is widely perceived as garbage, and simply therefore, people bent on Windows will be optimistic about its successor.
Public opinion is a fickle thing, and in Microsoft's case, it was out for blood. Humans are Dog Pack creatures, and when somebody so despised goes down, their demise can be met with a bloodthirsty sort of glee from the public unless something is done to trigger a different kind of emotional response. With the recent public warming toward Linux on all those millions of cheap new netbooks, and the hostility the world was feeling for being strong-armed into buying Vista, I can understand the motivation behind Microsoft to invest heavily in a public relations fix. Spending that kind of money all in one shot smelled to me of desperation.
-FL
Occam's razor leads me to conclude that the Seinfeld/Gates ad campaign was a failure, not a step in some grand plan.
I don't think Occam's razor has ever applied to Microsoft. Things that look like genius strategic moves turn out to be blind luck, while things that are absolute disasters emerge from what appears to be their most insightful thinking.
... and then they built the supercollider.