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Microsoft To Open Retail Stores
chaz373 writes "CNET reports that Microsoft is going retail. In the 'Beyond Binary' blog Ina Fried reports, 'After years of brushing off the notion, Microsoft said on Thursday that it will open up its own line of retail stores. Without detailing the plans, Microsoft said it has hired David Porter, a 25-year Wal-Mart veteran, to lead the effort. Sources say that Porter's mission will be to develop the company's retail plans and that the effort is likely to start small with just a few locations.'"
It must be another example of "Microsoft Innovation"
I mean no other member of the computer industry has EVER tried opening brick and mortar retail spaces... oh, wait
I can pick up Microsoft software at nearly anywhere already
Damn, looks like The Pirate Bay'll have some competition.
Clippy will man the Super Genius Bar. And they will have Karaoke using that new tech of theirs. Don't forget the $10,000 coffee tables.
To the first person who obtains, and releases into the Microsoft retail store, a dog bearing an uncanny resemblance to the horrible Windows search dog.
I bought the protection agreement!
she was the daughter of a wealthy florentine pogen read em and weep was her adjustable slogan
Maybe they could sell cheap leather shoes? They could bring in Bill to do his stand-up routine.
"Hey guys, let's do an OSS protest !"
"Yeah, but where ?"
"I have an idea about it..."
The Wise adapts himself to the world. The Fool adapts the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the Fool.
Why would anyone go to a store when they can download viruses at home for free?
Say hello to my little sig.
Please, please, a "Get the Facts" bar.
What will you protest?
We are from Support of Open Source Software and we are Protesting that Microsoft is spending money and hiring people to operate a retail store. Which time will tell if it is successful for not.
Although our movement is not actually For or against Microsoft (While we have opposing view on software licensing and distribution) but most of our members really don't like them, because we had to buy their product once.
If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
I'll take a triple venti FUDaccino with extra FUD please!
My blog
Except girls will talk to you if you have a Mac. I'm sorry but it is true.
If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
Windows genuine bar
Microsoft: The fail is strong with this one...
how long until
Wow! This really takes me back! Who here over the age of 25 never pulled this one at their local 80's retailer (I was always partial to Sears, myself...):
10 PRINT "SEARS SUCKS!"
20 GOTO 10
Looks like I finally have a reason to learn javascript...
Yeah, but do you really want to *talk* to a girl who would judge you based on your computer brand?
SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
I wonder if the chairs will be bolted down?
They'll sell piles of Zunes, and for the first time two people who both own Zunes will meet in some kind of weird real-life "Social" situation?
Saskboy's blog is good. 9 out of 10 dentists agree.
I'm guessing that they've done a little bit of research before going down this road.
Oh come on! I know this is /. and all of you pretend to not have touched Windows for years, but surely it's going to be called "The Task Bar".
I can see it now: you walk into the store (by accident) and an assistant dressed as a paper clip appears beside you saying
"You look like you're trying to buy a PC. Shall I ..
* ignore all your needs and suggest one now
* spew FUD about anything not owned by Microsoft
* help myself to your wallet now
* do a weird little spin and bugger off!"
Will they squirt each other? (not my words, Microsoft's own marketing terms)
Please god let them have a coffee shop with wireless!
The next time your favorite release comes out it will be a great place to gather and do installs -
as long as they serve 'Ultimate' drinks
Maybe they can move into all of the stores Gateway left behind. What's gonna be the equivalent of the Apple Genius - the Microsoft Dumbass? And let's hope this pushes Larry Ellison to open some roadside Oracle and Homemade Beef Jerky kiosks
Would you like any "Ulltimate Extra's" with that ?
Yeah, but do you really want to *talk* to a girl who would judge you based on your computer brand?
Talk... to a girl? This is still slashdot, right?
Can I bring in my daughter's malware infested PC and have them clean it up?
I don't read your sig. Why are you reading mine?
Yeah, but do you really want to *talk* to a girl who would judge you based on your computer brand?
Just curious, why is that worse than a girl talking to you because she thinks you are cute? You can't spot a personality from across a room, so you have to use some other criteria.
I, personally, appreciate women who have a Dell but then put a little Apple sticker over the Dell sign. Low maintenance. You can keep a woman like that happy with knockoff Coach purses bought in Chinatown and lots of cubic zirconium... :)
W..w..W - Willy Waterloo washes Warren Wiggins who is washing Waldo Woo.
The apple store, got it. I'm on my way!
Hey, look! It's Bono's brother.
Here's how I imagine the shopping experience (with added Friday feeling) to go:
A vast marble edifice, slate grey with flecks of blue looms in the high street. You enter through blue screen doors.
You bag is checked for suspicious packages by a security guard, he is blind.
There are ten aisles stretching into the distance:
Operating systems Office software Games Office hardware/software Home hardware/software Home/Office hardware Security software Family software Media operating systems/hardware/software Books and magazines (this aisle is empty)
Finally, a long row of checkouts awaits shoppers with one single booth for help/returns and support. Unlike most stores, you must go to each till in turn, paying many times for your product. The support booth is unmanned.
above the operating systems aisle, is a timeline of all Microsoft operating systems, MS-DOS 2.0 and Windows Vista are absent from this line. Instead of being able to buy Windows Vista, you can take an IOU on Windows 7.
In the Office software aisle, a long ribbon runs above the racks, at the far end it has fallen down, enveloped and is strangling a store assistant.
You cannot get into the games aisle for Xbox fanboys having an orgy. In one corner a former Flight-Sim developer is crying by the rack of FS titles.
Rest on my blog, goffee-freelance.blogspot.com
If he's the Walrus then can I be a penguin please?
You should hold out for Microsoft Store 7. I hear many of these problems have been addressed for the best ever customer experience.
"Three eyes are better than one" -- Lieutenant Columbo
I don't think the 4 year old will be all that happy doing demos of sending pics to her family 8 hours a day.
I'd feel more comfortable with the "Tool" Bar.
"Educate the mind but never at the expense of the soul."~Blessed Basil Moreau
Please, please, a "Get the Facts" bar.
Nope. The Mac store will have the Genius Bar and the Microsoft store will have the "Genius" Bar.
Kwisatz Haderach
Sell the spice to CHOAM
This Mahdi took Shaddam's Throne
Yeah, but the Ultimate drinks are much more expensive than the others, but it's the only one with all the tasty ingredients!
Yeah, but do you really want to *talk* to a girl who would judge you based on your computer brand?
Yes!
A million times yes!
Ugh, do you know how many carbs are in FUD? You might as well get the Halloween Documents cookie if you're going to indulge that much.
God invented whiskey so the Irish would not rule the world.
What makes think they'll know how to? These are Microsoft employees we're talking about.
God invented whiskey so the Irish would not rule the world.
In a way yes - women are after richer men, so given that Apples cost twice as much as the equivalent Windows branded PC there could be a subconcious motivating factor.
Dictated to Jeeves who is typing this into my MacBook Air for me. After this he will get me another vodka martini. No I won't.
Professor Karmadillo Songs of Science
Like all things Microsoft I'm going to recommend that everyone wait till version 3.0 comes out. Their microsoftSF store was opened at the height of the dot-com days in 1999 and was closed in 2001. This is version 2.0. I would at least wait until the 2nd store opens. But be warned that might be 2.1 and not 3.0. :P
Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
I prefer women with educations and jobs of their own. Such women have no need for expensive gifts because they can buy what they want on their own. It's not the 1800's anymore, guys.
A slashdotter who didn't build his own computer is like a Jedi who didn't build his own lightsaber.
nice..I suspect it will be a clippy bar~
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Get your fact straight: there are three people who own Zunes. There was a rumour that one of them returned it and had it exchanged for an iPod, but it's not true; he just re-gifted it.
He did get an iPod, though.
-dZ.
Carol vs. Ghost
Mu biggest fear is them stuffing some poor clerk in a 8ft tall Clippy suit and turning him loose in the mall. My worst desktop support nightmare come to life..
On the other hand I'll finally have the chance to beat that stupid paperclip senseless..
If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur. --Red Adair
the pull down blue shades when they are closed.
Tell me that wouldn't earn them some cred?
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
It'll be a great place to hand out OpenOffice CD's on a Sunday afternoon. I love living in Seattle.
Is there anything better than clicking through Microsoft ads on Slashdot?
That'll work until you discover that "Dora's Colombian Adventure" or some such bullshit requires Administrator access to run.
The cake is a pie
No you have got it all wrong its a clippy bar - there will be staff dressed up as clippy, and when you ask them anything give you three options none of which you wanted.
Most of the 8,500 sq ft was dedicated to "an interactive environment" to display Microsoft's vision of software.
Unlike the Apple store?
Even though everyone warned me that SF was a den of sodomy, I was still excited to go there. Like most tourists I decided to do some window shopping and then I saw the Microsoft Store. The prices looked pretty cheap so I decided to walk in and see if I could pick up some bargains.
Almost as soon as I stepped into the store, I heard someone scream, "Fresh Meat!"
Before I knew what was happening someone pulled the shade down and locked the exit. A man wearing nothing but leather chaps threw me to the ground. A bunch of doods wearing leather masks bound my arms with USB cables.
I was completely immobilized. That's when one of them screamed out "BUKAKE!!!!" The English language does not have words to describe the carnage that followed. Needless to say I am happy that this store has gone out of business.
Well I did hear it was better than the "Windows Genuine DRMocha" since from what I understand the DRM causes serious bloating and gas, and who wants that?
ACs don't waste your time replying, your posts are never seen by me.
I don't recall Commodore BASIC requiring the closing semicolon. :)
I wasn't as anti-retail as that, of course... I just liked to make the screen cycle through the pretty colors (all 16 of 'em) while the computer made siren sounds.
Village idiot in some extremely smart villages.