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Sperm Travels Faster Toward Attractive Females

Posted by samzenpus on from the like-father-like-gamete dept.

A new study has shown that even sperm can be superficial. Researchers found that males of many animal species, including humans, can adjust the speed and effectiveness of their sperm by regulating the amount of seminal fluid they produce during copulation. The determining factor on that amount of fluid seems to be whether the male finds the female attractive.

45 of 347 comments (clear)

  1. Research by sopssa · · Score: 5, Funny

    I've actually done some research on this aswell. On majority of times when I found a good clip, I had to clean my monitor. This didn't happen when the clip was bad or the women on it unattractive. Hmm, wonder where they sell speedometers...

    1. Re:Research by thesolo · · Score: 4, Informative

      Only on /. could this comment get modded up to 5, Insightful.

    2. Re:Research by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Maybe the moderators misread it; perhaps their monitors were grimy.

    3. Re:Research by X0563511 · · Score: 5, Informative

      quick tip: angle it back, so it doesn't land all over your shit, and lands on you. YOU can take a shower. Your computer, desk, and other such things cannot.

      --
      For large sets, this will be our guide even unto death, for the LORD will work for each type of data it is applied to...
    4. Re:Research by clone53421 · · Score: 4, Funny

      I was going to respond to this story and point out that the title should probably read "Sperm travels faster INSIDE attractive females", but in your case it's probably better as it was originally put.

      --
      Alexander Peter Kristopeit bought his basement from his mommy for one dollar.
    5. Re:Research by khellendros1984 · · Score: 5, Funny

      And close your eyes and mouth. I really can't stress that enough.

      --
      It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
    6. Re:Research by elrous0 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Speak for yourself. I have a fetish for plain and ugly women. I walked into a public library the other day and almost lost it right there.

      --
      SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
  2. HUH? by arizwebfoot · · Score: 4, Insightful

    If she was not attractive, why would he even be in there? Unless of course it is right after the bars close.

    Oh wait . . .

    Bars = alcohol
    alcohol = drunk
    ugly girls = cute girls

    Now I've got it.

    --
    Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
    1. Re:HUH? by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 5, Funny

      So you're saying that the goggles actually do something?

      --
      Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
    2. Re:HUH? by jo42 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Depends on your definition of "attractive". Latest pop culture trend is to find large asses "attractive". Personally, I do not find large 'booty' or 'thick' females "attractive" and thus would not "hit it".

  3. Too small a sample size. by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 4, Funny

    I, for one, find their statistics sub-par and wish to volunteer my services for further study into the effect of having sex with attractive females on sperm behaviour.

    --
    Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
    1. Re:Too small a sample size. by Kiaser+Zohsay · · Score: 5, Funny

      Unfortunately, it will probably be a double-blind study, so you've got a fifty-fifty shot at winding up in the control group.

      --
      I am not your blowing wind, I am the lightning.
    2. Re:Too small a sample size. by Arancaytar · · Score: 5, Funny

      This is Slashdot. You take what you can get.

    3. Re:Too small a sample size. by Hogwash+McFly · · Score: 5, Funny

      *shrug* I don't mind. I've had enough of the placebo...

      --
      Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
  4. For animals yes,,, but... by blahplusplus · · Score: 5, Insightful

    ... I can see a problem with this study if applying it's conclusions to people. I imagine the amount of sperm has to do more with being extremely turned on and not just attractiveness, you can be with a beautiful girl and not be that turned on because you don't get along that well, and you can be with an average girl who you connect with on a fundamental level that turns you on way more then the prettier girl.

    1. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      also, don't forget about anal

    2. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by Andy+Dodd · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Attraction isn't just physical... "turned on" = attracted

      --
      retrorocket.o not found, launch anyway?
    3. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by Chris+Burke · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Seems like the same conclusion to me, if you simply expand the definition of "attractive" for human males to mean more than superficial physical features; shouldn't "sexually attractive" essentially be a synonym for "sexually arousing"? The question would always be "what does the male find attractive in females?" and while for red junglefowl this may be a simple and largely empirical matter, for humans it obviously isn't. For the human version of the study, you'd probably just have to ask the man his opinion to find the correlation, though if humans have this ability then I would expect that you would see it correlate with "sexual attractiveness" as you surmise, and not "physical beauty" which isn't necessarily the same thing.

      --

      The enemies of Democracy are
    4. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by Zakabog · · Score: 4, Funny

      This is knows as the Hottie-Frigid paradox. The most scorching hot women are nearly certain to be lousy in bed.

      Spoken like someone who has given up all hope of having sex with an extremely attractive woman. Unless she's bored, or really new to sex, it's highly unlikely that she'll be any worse at it than any other girl.

    5. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by Maxo-Texas · · Score: 5, Insightful

      That's because scorching hot females who like sex move to places like hollywood or palm beach or even go into business in some way (even if it is only as a vegas show girl). And if you happen to hook up with them, they are likely to sleep around on you ( and not just women- attractive men also sleep around a lot ). Hot women have different expectations of life-- just like people who are born and grow up rich.

      They also have pretty severe defense mechanisms having been hit on and flattered since they were 13 by everyone. Meanwhile, the more normal females who didn't get as much flattery are still open to it. In a way, being pretty sucks because they have trouble accepting compliments.

      Never got that lucky (or unlucky?) until I was in my late 30's. And then I hooked up with a hotty who later turned out to have been a stripper back in her 20s and tho it was incredibly fun for 10 years, it ended as horrifically as you can imagine (maybe more so). Before then, I'd have a decently average hot high school sweetheart (so I missed the whole bar scene/college party scene) and then a nicely hot dancing lady who was really sweet but had terminal religious problems with me (I'm not religious-- sometimes it would be easier if I was).

      --
      She was like chocolate when she drank... semi-sweet at first and then increasingly bitter.
    6. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by swb · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Spoken like someone who's never had a shitty lay from a hot girl...

      I think there's some folk wisdom beyond the obvious "sour grapes" rationalization. In my experience, many attractive women have a tendency towards narcissism, egomania and a sense of entitlement. *If* she deems you worthy enough to fuck you, that decision is about all the effort she'll put into the entire experience -- you're just supposed to be some grateful and in awe you won't need her to suck your dick or otherwise engage.

      Look at the Paris Hilton sex tape -- in many scenes, she's entirely vacant and almost passive while Solomon hammers away with a pretty decent bit of equipment. She's more obsessed with her own appearance, like she's posing.

      Now, are all attractive women head cases? No, and the ones that are I'm usually willing to believe are victims of a society that REWARDS superficial beauty and encourages the narcissism, and aren't pathologically evil. And in some cases, sex with a hot girl does have its own internal narcissistic reward that colors the sex and makes it "better". But I think there's enough to link beauty and psychology to make it a phenomenon that can be found out there.

      Surprisingly less common is the idea that plain/ugly girls are great lays. The logic being that they have to be better lays because they can't coast on their looks. Probably also nominally true, but probably less so since many less attractive people are more socially withdrawn and less unlikely to be available, plus the demotivating factor of bad looks may be stronger than the motivating factor of good looks.

    7. Re:For animals yes,,, but... by atraintocry · · Score: 5, Funny

      she's entirely vacant

      In her defense, she appears that way in her movie and TV work as well.

  5. lol by syrinx · · Score: 5, Funny

    The best part of this article is the tag "!newsfornerds".

    --
    Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
  6. Re:Speed vs inner beauty by sopssa · · Score: 5, Funny

    You would think so, considering thats only what the sperm sees.

  7. HE SHOOTS! by Philip+K+Dickhead · · Score: 5, Funny

    HE SCORES!

    Or vice versa, if I read the article correctly...

    --
    "Speaking the Truth in times of universal deceit is a revolutionary act." -- George Orwell
  8. Fertility by Royanon · · Score: 4, Interesting

    This article was pretty interesting; for example the possible link between this and fertility rates. If there is indeed a link, it's going to come as a slap to the face for some couples having trouble. I also found it pretty interesting that sperm quality can be improved by daily masturbation.

    --
    "My crime is that of curiosity."
    1. Re:Fertility by DinDaddy · · Score: 5, Funny

      I also found it pretty interesting that sperm quality can be improved by daily masturbation.

      Why? Everything is improved by daily masturbation.

  9. This is bad by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Combined with this research, which shows that ugly men release more sperm, the chance of conception appears to be highest when a stunningly attractive woman sleeps with an truly ugly man. Somebody please think of the children.

    1. Re:This is bad by SaDan · · Score: 5, Funny

      Hrm... I have cute kids, and my wife is pretty decent on the eyes as well.

      Shit. I'm the ugly one. :-(

  10. Re:How do they know? by gstoddart · · Score: 5, Informative

    How does a sperm "know" if a female is attractive? Or are we talking about money shots from porn films here?

    Despite the misleading headline, they say that males seem to be able to adjust -- most likely related to level of hormones or arousal.

    Nobody is suggesting the sperm "know" anything, merely that the human glandular system is complex, and this is another example. :-P

    Cheers

    --
    Lost at C:>. Found at C.
  11. Re:How do they know? by gstoddart · · Score: 4, Informative

    Nobody is suggesting the sperm "know" anything, merely that the human glandular system is complex, and this is another example. :-P

    Or, more accurately in this case, red junglefowl. :-P

    Cheers

    --
    Lost at C:>. Found at C.
  12. From the department of duh? by girlintraining · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Yeah, and? It's also been established that other male mammals, including humans, can reply with something call semen displacement (circumsized males need not apply, some restrictions may apply, see mate for full rules and details) Women aren't without their biological defenses either; Concealing ovulation, various vaginal defenses, such as lack of secretions leading to a lower likelihood of fertility, etc., etc.

    But really people, is it so freaking hard to just take us out to dinner, kiss our neck afterwords in an intimate and quiet environment, and actually DO the foreplay (and for those in longer-term relationships, not have it become formulaic?) Because if the sex sucks, it isn't going to matter how much scientific knowledge you have about the mating process -- it doesn't change the fact that it will still end in tears for you! *mutters* They can tell me down to the molecular level how conception works, but they can't even get the damn condom out of the wrapper and a bra off without completely ruining it...

    --
    #fuckbeta #iamslashdot #dicemustdie
    1. Re:From the department of duh? by gnick · · Score: 4, Informative

      But really people, is it so freaking hard to just take us out to dinner, kiss our neck afterwords in an intimate and quiet environment, and actually DO the foreplay (and for those in longer-term relationships, not have it become formulaic?)

      That goes both ways (especially if you're talking about a long term relationship). We guys accept the duty of keeping things interesting, but chicks have to play too if things are going to keep going well after a decade into the relationship. But I agree - Mood >> biological process. There is very little less sexy to a guy than a chick that just wants to score a baby. Ugh - I'd rather fly solo, thanks.

      ...They can tell me down to the molecular level how conception works, but they can't even get the damn condom out of the wrapper and a bra off without completely ruining it...

      Again, it all comes down to mood. I find the best way to remove a bra is to make sure that things are moving smoothly and then say, "Lose the bra". Beats even the 1-handed Fonzie-level-cool maneuver and, assuming that the environment is right, can actually warm things up. (Of course, that is not always appropriate and a guy should be prepared to adjust.)

      On topic, though, I can personally testify that a guy who is thoroughly turned on and has been for a while will, um, launch much more thoroughly and with more velocity than somebody who's just going through the motions.

      Wow - WTF is this discussion doing on slashdot?!?

      --
      He's getting rather old, but he's a good mouse.
    2. Re:From the department of duh? by NewbieProgrammerMan · · Score: 4, Insightful

      But really people, is it so freaking hard to just take us out to dinner, kiss our neck afterwords in an intimate and quiet environment, and actually DO the foreplay (and for those in longer-term relationships, not have it become formulaic?)

      Apparently it's really freaking hard for most guys, based on the difficulty many women seem to have in finding guys that meet those criteria. That said, it's apparently also really freaking hard for many women to show the same level of respect for men's similarly simple expectations.

      --
      [b.belong('us') for b in bases if b.owner() == 'you']
  13. Wonder if this will work. by wilburx · · Score: 5, Funny

    Don't worry, I don't need to pull out because you're ugly.

  14. Some sperm will even find you in a pool.. by Nukenbar · · Score: 5, Funny

    That is, if you are a 13 year old "virgin".

  15. if you are talking ejaculate volume by circletimessquare · · Score: 5, Insightful

    in the animal kingdom and in humans, you need to talk about testicle size

    testicle size is a very good indicator of how monogamous females are. for example, chimpanzee females are very promiscuous. therefore, male chimpanzees have huge testicles. why? well, if the idea is you have to leave some offspring in this world, the only valid route you can take to ensure that with promiscuous females is to have a huge ejaculate load, to literally flood out competing males' sperm

    it follows then that attractive females, with more frequent mating possibilities, require more "output" to ensure your reproductive success. so, biologically, it may not be a matter of aesthetic pleasure leading to greater sperm volume, but simply a matter of fear: you need to dump a huge load to make sure your sperm outcompetes all the other mating opportunities an attractive female can command

    --
    intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
    1. Re:if you are talking ejaculate volume by Sponge+Bath · · Score: 4, Funny

      ...you need to talk about testicle size

      And testicle count. A common misconception is that human males only have two, when they actually have three. This is because the center testicle is hidden in a fold of scrotum between the other two. Women who are interested should check this out with their husbands and boyfriends tonight.

  16. and what makes a female rat attractive? by petes_PoV · · Score: 4, Insightful
    More to the point, how can the researchers assess which female rats are "babes" and which ones are fuglies.

    I really hope they're not projecting their own feelings and biases into the equation here. For this experiment to have any scientific value, there must be an objective measure of attractiveness, one with a proper definition and units (including a calibration standard). Can someone please tell me, for humans, what this measurement is based on, what the units are (Helens? the amount of beauty required to launch 1000 ships - but beauty is not attractiveness) and, most important, who the calibration reference is?

    Men need to know.

    --
    politicians are like babies' nappies: they should both be changed regularly and for the same reasons
  17. In other words... by Ragnarok21 · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...drink until she's cute, but stop before the wedding.

  18. Sperm? They Can be Superficial? by Philip+K+Dickhead · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does the article posting mean this in a topological meaning? :-)

    I take that to mean on the chest and face. (.Y.)

    --
    "Speaking the Truth in times of universal deceit is a revolutionary act." -- George Orwell
  19. Re:How do they know? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    Please do not end a conversation about sperm and human glands with the word "Cheers!"
    That is all.

  20. From the article: by drunken_boxer777 · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Males may alter the velocity of sperm they allocate to copulations by strategically firing their left and right ejaculatory ducts, which can operate independently," they explained.

    "I know what you're thinking. 'Did he fire one ejaculatory duct or two?' Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya?"

  21. Re:Doing the Dog by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    It took me three tries to realize you weren't being literal.

  22. Re:Thanks Captain Obvious... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    5. Female