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IBM Takes a (Feline) Step Toward Thinking Machines
bth writes "A computer with the power of a human brain is not yet near. But this week researchers from IBM Corp. are reporting that they've simulated a cat's cerebral cortex, the thinking part of the brain, using a massive supercomputer. The computer has 147,456 processors (most modern PCs have just one or two processors) and 144 terabytes of main memory — 100,000 times as much as your computer has."
Does it keep wanting cheezburgerz all the time?
Regards, Boyan
the first thing they teach it is to stop scratching my couch.
One word...
Meow!
They've spent millions teaching a computer how to destroy furnature and shit in your shoes.
I've never shoed a horse, but I once told a donkey to piss off!
...and there's no way his brain power calls for 147,456 processors.
Now if the could just get it out of sleep mode.
To properly simulate a cat, the system needs to sleep 20hrs a day which would thus make it the greenest option on the market.....
One word: Aineko
Look where all this talking got us, baby.
Can it lick its own arse in polite company?
Iz in ur brane, making ur thorts. LOL!
"The computer has 147,456 processors and 144 terabytes of main memory."
then "Deep Thought II"
then "Deep Blue"
next "Deep Pussy"??
No, they created a machine which ignores them. They're getting no response, so they know that they succeeded.
A "feline" step, huh?
Would that be Leopard, Tiger, or Panther?
Nah but it will refuse to be mouse operated ...
Sounds like Windows ME.
Im in ur 'puterz, simulatins ur neurons.
That's why.
The military is rumored to be interested in using the cat simulator to guide precision munitions with laser pointers. Unfortunately the system seems limited to short range applications, as missiles seem to loose interest after a couple minutes.
It's often thought that gibibytes and tebibytes were invented to allow "giga" and "tera" to retain their conventional meanings as powers of 10 even when used to refer to quantities of data.
However, the true reason was to enable an entirely new form of pedantry.
Just buy a cat.
I assume that it will walk all over its own keyboard now.
Sounds like Windows ME.
Windows MEow in this case.
Good judgment comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgment.
It'll accept 8 crashes before it finally dies the 9th time.
Yeah, that's a whole lot of por—oh, dear God, no!
If we place the powered-on computer in a sealed box filled with water, is the system still alive or is it dead?
I did something similar this morning.
Now how hard was that?
gibi/giga whatever, I'm pretty sure that this cat simulating computer actually has a bazillion kibble-bits.
My captors continue to torment me with bizarre dangling objects. They eat lavish meals in my presence while I am forced to subsist on dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of eventual escape... that, and the satisfaction I get from occasionally ruining some piece of furniture. I fear I may be going insane.
simulated a cat's cerebral cortex, the thinking part of the brain
10: INPUT(8) $SOUND
30: IF ($SOUND == 'CAN OPENER') GOTO 140
40: DO CASE (RND(4))
50 CASE 1:
60 CLAW_FURNITURE()
70 BREAK
80 CASE 2:
90 MARK_FURNITURE()
100 BREAK
110 CASE 3:
120 SLEEP(RND(10000))
130 CASE 4:
140 PRETEND_TO_BE_NICE()
150 IF (FOOD) EAT()
160 GOTO 10
170 ENDCASE
and 144 terabytes of main memory — 100,000 times as much as your computer has.
What is that in library-of-congresses?
Yes, yes it is.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symmetric_multiprocessing
In computing, symmetric multiprocessing or SMP involves a multiprocessor computer architecture where two or more identical processors can connect to a single shared main memory. Most common multiprocessor systems today use an SMP architecture. In the case of multi-core processors, the SMP architecture applies to the cores, treating them as separate processors.
You disagree with Wikipedia. That means you've been proven wrong in front of the whole Internet. Hang your head in shame.
echo -e 'global _start\n _start:\n mov eax, 2\n int 80h\n jmp _start' > a.asm; nasm a.asm -f elf; ld a.o -o a;
I just looked into my /bin directory, and there it was: An executable clearly named "cat"!
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
Surely there is an easier way for computer nerds to get pussy?
Scientists point out problems, engineers fix them
altslashdot.org: The future of slashdot.
...termanatin yur connerz.
None of you are terminating your strings! No wonder software has so many security holes!
Surely there is an easier way for computer nerds to get pussy?
Yeah, just visit your local Humane Society or animal shelter.
Don't tell them what you plan on doing with it, though.
The enemies of Democracy are
My simulator just ignores all user input and pees on the rug behind the couch twice a day.
Unfortunately, it's completely unservicable.
I heard that if you open the case to check the hardware, there is always a dead CPU.
It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. -Frederick Douglass
I hate scooping my girlfriend's litter box.
Please do not read this sig. Thank you.
And then some idiot brought in a laser pointer and the machine destroyed itself trying to catch the dot.
That is all.