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Denver Rejects UFO Agency To Track Aliens

Republicans weren't the only ones to win big yesterday. Aliens in The Mile-High City can breathe easier thanks to voters rejecting a plan to officially track them. From the article: "The proposal defeated soundly Tuesday night would have established a commission to track extraterrestrials. It also would have allowed residents to post their observations on Denver's city Web page and report sightings." Let the anonymous probings begin!

59 of 80 comments (clear)

  1. Would these be illegal aliens? by fkx · · Score: 1, Funny

    Would these be illegal aliens?

    Or is there some sort of interplanetary visa?

    1. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by Skarecrow77 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I was about to point out that tracking aliens, as they're most likely crossing state lines on their descent from orbit, is obviously a federal responsibility, and thus completely out of the jurisdiction of the city of Denver.

    2. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by headhot · · Score: 1

      Well they probably cross national borders too, so its clearly the UN's job.

    3. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by Anomalyx · · Score: 1

      UN's job.

      Error - not found.

      --
      No, there is no "-1 I'LL NEVER ADMIT BEING WRONG!!!" mod.
    4. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by master0ne · · Score: 1

      and they most deffinatly crossed planitary boundries... what orginization do we have in place to deal with these aliens? there needs to be oversite! these aliens cant keep comming in, stealing hard working earthling jobs! someone think of the earthli.... I WELCOME OUR NEW ALIEN OVERLORDS.... PLEASE GOTO YOUR LOCAL WATER TOWER FOR MANDITORY PROBINGS EARTH... ERR FELLOW HUMANS!

      --
      Noone writes jokes in base 13!
    5. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by harrytuttle777 · · Score: 1

      Hey illegal immigration worked great for the Roman Empire and it worked great for the American Indians, I don't see what the USA has to worry about.

    6. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by severoon · · Score: 1

      But...without an expensive government bureaucracy, how are the people of Denver supposed to post this and other info online?

      --
      but have you considered the following argument: shut up.
    7. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by jameskojiro · · Score: 1

      No worries at all, should be great, at least we are not like those xenophobic prudes in Japan.

      --
      Tsukasa: All I really want, is to be left alone...
    8. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by Yvan256 · · Score: 1

      There you go, pushing your commercial agenda on us again.

      Who's to say they wouldn't prefer an interplanetary mastercard?

    9. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by vegiVamp · · Score: 1

      That's not a given, actually. Apart from the possibility of a straight descent, there is also a limit to how high up and down property rights extend. Can't be bothered to go looking for it, though.

      --
      What a depressingly stupid machine.
    10. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by geekoid · · Score: 1

      On a spinning globe, it's highly unlikely you can approach earth without crossing borders. Even the Apollo astronaut had to file paperwork, including declaring the moon rocks, to return into the US.

      --
      The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
    11. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by __aatirs3925 · · Score: 1

      No offense taken you know.

    12. Re:Would these be illegal aliens? by vegiVamp · · Score: 1

      True, but the number of borders you cross will be strongly dependant on how high up property rights are valid, and it can't be infinite exactly because of the spinning globe :-)

      On the other hand, even if the aliens are aware of borders and associated issues, the question remains whether they care.

      --
      What a depressingly stupid machine.
  2. Damn! by Quiet_Desperation · · Score: 1

    I was so going to send them a resume. I'd be so overqualified they'd put me in charge, and I'd officially rename it the Fringe Division.

    I was *THIS* close to being in charge of the Fringe Division! DAMN YOU, COLORADO VOTERS!!!!

  3. Whew! by 2names · · Score: 2, Funny

    Boy, I dodged a bullet there. Now I can remain anony...oh shit.

    --
    "I'm just here to regulate funkiness."
    1. Re:Whew! by Conchobair · · Score: 1

      Plan A continues as planned.

  4. As a denver voter... by hellkyng · · Score: 2, Funny

    I felt tracking aliens was a serious attack on their privacy, I saw the ads against the measure cleverly titled Skyline, they spoke to me. I know what would happen if it passed...

    1. Re:As a denver voter... by eln · · Score: 2, Funny

      Yeah, nice attempt at rationalizing your anti-American stance, commie. Now that you aren't tracking UFOs, Denver is destined to become a sanctuary city for aliens. We'll see who's laughing when anal-probe-related crime skyrockets.

    2. Re:As a denver voter... by damien_kane · · Score: 1

      ...require cloning research to hand off truly mind numbing and dangerous work to clones. :)

      That's multi-body job efficiency and task-assistance research, citizen; and it is for your protection, and your fun.
      Anyone found referring to their method of assisting the complex as "mind numbing" must be a traitor, for work is fun. Friend computer has ensured that enjoyment of a citizen's job is at maximum levels. As well, the amount of danger involved in all job has been reviewed and found to be within acceptable tolerances.

      Enjoy your wonder life, as enabled by Friend Computer. As always, citizen, remember, Friend Computer loves you, and fun is mandatory.

    3. Re:As a denver voter... by Skater · · Score: 1

      I was on a cruise ship in the Atlantic last week, and for some reason the network affiliates we got on TV aboard were Denver stations. HOLY CRAP you guys had some nasty campaign ads. And we live in the DC area - I thought ours were bad! You have my sympathy.

      I don't remember seeing any ads for this issue, though, but I did know about it because I saw it mentioned on CNN under "oddball initiatives" or something like that.

    4. Re:As a denver voter... by pspahn · · Score: 1

      Yeah, Hickenlooper was at least a breath of fresh air, even though I didn't vote for him. I would approve of his job as mayor, though, except for the goddamn parking enforcement. You, Mayor John, are a parking Nazi. There is no good reason I should be ticketed for parking in front of my own house.

      --
      Someone flopped a steamer in the gene pool.
  5. Finally! by headhot · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Something R's and D's can come together and not support. UFO research!

    1. Re:Finally! by AndrewNeo · · Score: 1

      Some might swear the tea party R's are just turning it down as a coverup.

    2. Re:Finally! by interkin3tic · · Score: 1

      At least until the "birther" conspiracy theorists get slightly more crazy...

    3. Re:Finally! by antdude · · Score: 1

      What about 2's? :)

      --
      Ant(Dude) @ Quality Foraged Links (AQFL.net) & The Ant Farm (antfarm.ma.cx / antfarm.home.dhs.org).
  6. Oblig. Simpsons by delinear · · Score: 5, Funny

    Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos.

    1. Re:Oblig. Simpsons by ikeman32 · · Score: 1

      Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos.

      "The revolution is successful. But survival depends on drastic measures. Your continued existence represents a threat to the well-being of society. Your lives mean slow death to the more valued members of the colony. Therefore, I have no alternative but to sentence you to death. Your execution is so ordered, signed Kodos, Governor of Tarsus IV."

  7. Only a matter of time by lennier1 · · Score: 1

    They'll sing a different tune once the first Chestbursters show up.

  8. So... by AlfaMike · · Score: 1

    The aliens have technology to travel several lightyears and have nothing better to do than jerk around screwing with peoples heads? I say don't track the useless bastards. Just let them keep flying around and doing nothing.

    1. Re:So... by mangu · · Score: 1

      Actually, there are some nice places to visit in Denver.

    2. Re:So... by pspahn · · Score: 1

      Seriously? You're going to link some random unheard of brewery and Shotgun Willies?

      Well, I guess if it keeps more yahoos away from Denver, then yes... this is the best we have to offer. Also, our women are all fat and have 6 kids by the age of 30, the sun never shines, and there are very very very few local beers to choose from.

      --
      Someone flopped a steamer in the gene pool.
  9. The ghosthunters opposed this by smellsofbikes · · Score: 4, Informative
    No, seriously. The Rocky Mountain Paranormal Society was a leading opponent to this because they felt it was embarrassing and people should keep looking for, y'know, ghosts, rather than aliens.

    In any case, it was to be funded by donations rather than taxes.

    --
    Nostalgia's not what it used to be.
    1. Re:The ghosthunters opposed this by noidentity · · Score: 1

      If it was funded by donations, why did the city need to be involved?

    2. Re:The ghosthunters opposed this by smellsofbikes · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Presumably, to give some official sanction to the shenanigans. If some guy walked up to you and asked you for a donation to the contact-the-aliens fund, you'd think he was going to use the money to go get drunk. In contrast, if some guy walked up to you and provided you with official City Of Denver contact-the-aliens literature and explained how the voters had passed a resolution to ... well, do whatever it is they were going to do, you'd at least know that your money wasn't going to be used to get that guy drunk right that very moment, that there would at least be some official oversight and transparency to the whole lobbyist-martian-hookers-and-glowing-green-blow show.

      In much the same way, the local utility company runs a fund to subsidize low-income families' heating bills, run entirely by voluntary donations that people add to their standard utility bill. A similar fund run privately would have nearly zero traction for a number of reasons.

      --
      Nostalgia's not what it used to be.
    3. Re:The ghosthunters opposed this by Darinbob · · Score: 1

      And still, 20,000 people voted FOR the proposal...

    4. Re:The ghosthunters opposed this by gtall · · Score: 1

      I tend to think it would be much better to fund the fellow who looks like he'd get drunk on the money; he'd have a better chance of seeing aliens.

    5. Re:The ghosthunters opposed this by smellsofbikes · · Score: 1
      To quote some lyrics from Lazyboy's brilliant song Underwear Goes Inside The Pants

      "This homeless guy asked me for money the other day.

      I was about to give it to him and then I thought he was going to use it on drugs or alcohol.

      And then I thought, that's what I'm going to use it on.

      Why am I judging this poor bastard."

      --
      Nostalgia's not what it used to be.
  10. And Georgia strengthens non-compete agreements by linebackn · · Score: 1

    What I would like to know more about, in Georgia there was a proposed amendment that would somehow strengthen non-compete employment agreements (I regret I don't fully understand it, I could not find as much info as I would like about it in the time available to me). What bugs me about it was the wording on the ballot made it sound almost like the voters would be killing kittens if they didn't vote for it.

    Unsurprisingly, it looks like it got voted in but I have not heard much in the media about it so far.

    I guess space aliens are more interesting.

    1. Re:And Georgia strengthens non-compete agreements by nschubach · · Score: 1

      Nothing to see here... ooh, look over there! Aliens!

      --
      Every time I start to have faith in humanity, I ruin it by driving to work between 7 and 8 am.
    2. Re:And Georgia strengthens non-compete agreements by Nidi62 · · Score: 1

      I did really like the part in that Proposition where it basically says "we'll make Georgia more economically competitive by not allowing people to compete!"

      --
      The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for it to be pitted against a slightly greater evil
  11. How do you get a proposition on the ballot? by PolygamousRanchKid+ · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Don't you need to collect a number of signatures, or can you just propose something wacky, and it gets on? This one seems so ridiculous, that I'm surprised that it even needed to be voted on. So, how many folks in Denver signed, and thought that the city really needs this. I guess I would sign, just because the idea is such a hoot and a half.

    --
    Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
    1. Re:How do you get a proposition on the ballot? by pspahn · · Score: 1

      Likely because Denver tends to get pretty politically active. I would imagine that whoever was out collecting signatures (you only need 800 to get on the ballot for US Congress for Colorado District 1, which is over 600,000 people) was just getting people to sign because it's "cool to sign petitions". I have no idea what the signature requirement was for this, however. Either way, "sign my petition!" and a lot of the transplanted Denver youth do so blindly.

      --
      Someone flopped a steamer in the gene pool.
  12. Soviet Aliens by mangu · · Score: 1

    Illegal aliens, if caught, are subjected to a cavity search.

    These aliens, OTOH, if they catch you they'll perform an anal probing on you.

    1. Re:Soviet Aliens by Yvan256 · · Score: 1

      They're not performing anal probing, they're shooting inter-racial porn movies.

  13. If the U.N. can do it... by chaodyn · · Score: 1

    Since the U.N. already named an Alien Ambassador it seems logical that there should be some sort of organization to track all the visitors - besides the Men in Black, that is.

  14. Re:Bizna7ch by Clandestine_Blaze · · Score: 1

    Thanks, Gene Ray.

  15. Right... by feidaykin · · Score: 1
    From TFA:

    The Denver man who proposed the measure, Jeff Peckman, says the government is tracking alien sightings but refuses to make the reports public. Peckman is a meditation instructor and promoter of new technology, including something he says reduces the "chaos of electromagnetic fields."

    And his evidence for any of this is...? Maybe the voters rejected this because, after 60 or so years of the modern UFO "movement" we are no closer to any hard evidence than when it started. In that time real science has landed men on the Moon, conquered the atom and used computers to connect the world. I think the lesson here is that science works: it produces real, tangible results. Pseudoscience produces nothing, save the false sense of superiority in those that practice it. People that believe UFOs are alien spacecraft, and that the government covers it up, aren't interested in facts. They believe it in the same mode of thought people use for religion. And that's not to disparage religious folk; while I am not religious myself, I understand the desire to believe and the strength people can draw from that belief. But some modes of thought, such as accepting things on faith, are not useful for real science.

    Here's a major mistake UFO proponents make. They tend to believe, if science can't explain away every single detail about a UFO sighting, then it "must" be an alien spacecraft. It doesn't work that way though, because alien spacecraft are not known to exist. So, jumping to that conclusion is as absurd as saying it was elves or unicorns that caused the lights in the sky. And yet UFO proponents think explanations like "marsh gas" are absurd. But guess what: marsh gas is known to exist. So what's really more absurd? From the vantage point of science, we have to presume something does not exist until we have evidence it does. So until we have an alien spacecraft to examine up close, the default assumption will always be that they do not exist, and that will continue to be sound scientific reasoning until we have more than lights in the sky to support the alien spacecraft hypothesis.

    --

    "To confine our attention to terrestrial matters would be to limit the human spirit." -Stephen Hawking

    1. Re:Right... by Maritz · · Score: 1

      Agree completely. UFO proponents always have that slightly smug sense that somehow they've 'seen behind the curtain' and that skeptics are being naive. The point I think it boils down to is 'extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence' and some blurry photos or blocky footage are not compelling. With all the cameras around nowadays, many of which can take excellent pictures and footage, there should be good evidence IF there are alien spacecraft around. So basically there aren't. Would be awesome if there were, but there you go.

      --
      I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
  16. Dey tuk er jerbs! by GNUALMAFUERTE · · Score: 2, Funny

    Dey tuk er jerbs!

    --
    WTF am I doing replying to an AC at 5 A.M on a Friday night?
    1. Re:Dey tuk er jerbs! by NatasRevol · · Score: 1

      No, there were lots of local jobs.

      Look at how the airport was built.

      http://www.anomalies-unlimited.com/Denver_Airport.html

      --
      There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
    2. Re:Dey tuk er jerbs! by miffo.swe · · Score: 1

      You should thank Lars Knoll for choosing the GPL for their KTHML project. Thats the sole reason Apple are forced to share their improvements to the khtml rendering engine in return for all the free code they got from khtml. Its not like Apple had a choice in the matter except starting from scratch.

      --
      HTTP/1.1 400
    3. Re:Dey tuk er jerbs! by NatasRevol · · Score: 1

      Really? Had no choice? They couldn't have chosen some other browser implementation? Some other fork with some other license?

      And the KDE team did 'most' of the hard work? Have you seen what Apple has done? Yes, KDE laid a great foundation, but Apple has taken it much farther, faster than the KDE team ever could. Just go look at the CVS - anyone can. And don't forget that Apple's fork of KHTML happened in 1998.

      --
      There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
    4. Re:Dey tuk er jerbs! by NatasRevol · · Score: 1

      Man, you KHTML nutters really get torqued about my sig.

      Apple could have chosen some other implementation, some other fork, some other project with a different license.

      Be happy that Apple chose it - that choice made it a popular standard and now it has become ubiquitous across all major phone browsers.

      --
      There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
  17. I apologize... by T+Murphy · · Score: 1

    Sorry to post just to complain about spelling: when you breathe, you take a breath of fresh air. I have seen "breathe" written as "breath" so often that I almost doubt myself- I'm making the point to complain because I think a lot of people honestly don't know the difference.

    1. Re:I apologize... by miserere+nobis · · Score: 2, Funny

      Yes, once you see spelling errors of that sort enough times, you start to loose the ability to differentiate between the right and wrong version of the word.

    2. Re:I apologize... by damien_kane · · Score: 1

      Yes, once you see spelling errors of that sort enough times, you start two loose the ability too differentiate between the right and left version of the word.

      FTFY

  18. THE STEALTH BLIMP by kraemer · · Score: 1, Insightful

    For Christ sake, lets declassify stuff like this FIRST and THEN see if people still see UFO's??? OK???? http://www.thestealthblimp.com/

  19. Obviously somebody said "Alien" by elrous0 · · Score: 1

    And Denver thought they said " Illegal alien" and signed up.

    --
    SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
  20. Re:illegal aliens! by mldi · · Score: 1

    I find that I completely ignore what somebody has to say when they confuse "immigration" with "illegal immigration".

    --
    If you aren't suspicious of your government's actions, you aren't doing your job as a responsible citizen.