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TSA Saw My Junk, Missed Razor Blades, Says Adam Savage

Posted by timothy on from the happy-24th dept.

An anonymous reader writes "The TSA isn't the most respected of governmental agencies right now, but at least it comes by the poor reputation honestly. The lack of standards, inconsistent application of searches and policies, and occasional rude agent all combine to make flying an unpleasant experience. It's often derided as 'security theater,' which describes the experience of Mythbuster Adam Savage before a recent flight. Savage was put through the full-body scanner, and while he joked that it made his penis feel small, no one seemed to notice the items he was carrying on his person. The video tells the rest of the story."

26 of 609 comments (clear)

  1. TSA Security Theater by illumastorm · · Score: 5, Funny

    Next, on TSA Security Theater we have the story of the man who manages to bring 12 inch razor blades through security checks. Coming up... Savage Blades.

    1. Re:TSA Security Theater by LynnwoodRooster · · Score: 5, Interesting
      Even better, I just got back from Shanghai. I got bumped to business class from Tokyo to PDX, and dinner was sirloin steak. Complete with steak knife with a 5" serrated blade, a 9" total length metal butter knife, and a full-size metal dinner fork. Just given to me for sitting in the front section.

      .
      Who needs to smuggle on your own knife; buy a first class or business class ticket and get a nice, sharp, big knife given to you!

      --
      Browsing at +1 - no ACs, I ignore their posts. So refreshing!
    2. Re:TSA Security Theater by flyingkillerrobots · · Score: 5, Informative

      El-Al (Israel) gives knives to everyone, not just first class. They've been making fun of the other airlines about it for years. If everybody has knives, then a terrorist with a knife is no more dangerous than he'd be on the ground, assuming the knife cannot be used to somehow quickly down the plane.

      --
      "It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations..." -Winston Churchill
    3. Re:TSA Security Theater by InlawBiker · · Score: 5, Funny

      You don't really need a weapon at all. Just turn on any electrical device that gives off an RF signal while the plane ascends. Then watch that fucker go up in a firey fireball of death!

  2. Anthropomorphalicism by cosm · · Score: 5, Funny

    and while he joked that it made his penis feel small

    But how did it make him feel? Stop anthropomorphizing penises, they hate it when you do that!

    --
    'We are trying to prove ourselves wrong as quickly as possible, because only in that way can we find progress.' RPF
    1. Re:Anthropomorphalicism by fishexe · · Score: 5, Funny

      Modded off-topic? Bizarre. Grammar jokes are the heart and soul of Slashdot.

      No, posters that think they're being clever while confusing grammar with semantics are the heart and soul of Slashdot.

      --
      "I don't care about the Constitution!" --Bill O'Reilly, November 17, 2009
  3. The "enhanced" procedures are useless by KublaiKhan · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The only measure which has successfully prevented a terrorist attack since the '01 hijackings is the increased vigilance and response of the flying public.

    The TSA's measures are worse than useless: they actually create a hazard, with long, slow-moving, densely-packed lines full of by-definition unscreened persons--lines that are about the ripest target for a bomb that you can find.

    Go back to pre-'01 screening procedures, and empower passengers with good-samaritan style legislation that exempts persons from prosecution for acts they genuinely believe to be in prevention of a terrorist incident.

    --
    In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
    A stately pleasure dome decree
    1. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by damburger · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Oh, they are far from useless.

      They make an unreasonable request, you comply without thinking. They bark orders at you, you avoid eye contact and meekly take it. They are training you.

      --
      If we can put a man on the moon, why can't we shoot people for Apollo-related non-sequiturs?
    2. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by jcr · · Score: 5, Insightful

      The only measure which has successfully prevented a terrorist attack since the '01 hijackings is the increased vigilance and response of the flying public.

      Exactly. The perps have given up on attempting to hijack aircraft, the last two attacks (shoe bomber and underpants bomber) only tried to destroy the plane. The cockpit doors have been reinforced.

      I'm convinced that the whole purpose of the TSA is one big Milgram experiment to find out just how far we can be pushed before we resist. I'm rather disappointed that it got this far.

      -jcr

      --
      The only title of honor that a tyrant can grant is "Enemy of the State."
    3. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by KublaiKhan · · Score: 5, Insightful


      <p>I've been thinking about that for years, but never said anything because I didn't want to give anyone any ideas.</p>
      </quote>

      I've been -saying- that for years and it still hasn't happened. I figured that if I saw the possibility within five minutes of seeing the line, anyone else would be able to see it without too much trouble. I've been suspecting that either the so-called 'threat' is far, far overblown or these terrorists are complete and total idiots.

      Another of the obvious plots: shoot up (or toss bombs, or suicide-bomb, or carbomb, or...well, you get the point) a Black Friday opening line or three on the east coast at a big box store.

      Suddenly, everyone stays home rather than shopping; the economy is ruined for at least the last quarter. Much easier than trying to hijack a plane.

      --
      In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
      A stately pleasure dome decree
    4. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by MoonBuggy · · Score: 5, Insightful

      And yet they haven't done so, which is further evidence that either the pool of competent potential terrorists is vanishingly small or the intelligence agencies are doing their jobs well and preventing plots from getting off the ground (so to speak). In either case, it would appear that the TSA are unnecessary.

    5. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by Al+Dimond · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I have a feeling bombing a store on Black Friday wouldn't stop people from shopping. At the Wal-Mart in suburban New York where the doors were literally "busted" and people trampled to death (this was Black Friday 2008 IIRC) the shoppers just kept shopping. The police tried to clear the store for an investigation and were unable to do it. Not one of humanity's brighter moments.

      Point being, if one of those crowds was bombed it probably wouldn't even stop people from shopping at that store. Enterprising family members of the dead would be out in the parking lot auctioning off their newly-unneeded vehicles. Black Friday is a scourge more evil, and more powerful, than terrorism.

    6. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by tempest69 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I wish you weren't right.
      But were just being conditioned to behave and accept that the government is in control. Somehow the government gets some undeserved awe. I remember having it, where the government and the laws were something greater, and noble.
      Now I see it as a home owners association that has gotten too large and is full of itself. This is a problem, it is putting people through screening that is unnecessary and ineffectual. The right to balk at being screened has been removed. While I understand the rational, I find it to be reprehensible. We are not subjects, we are citizens, and we need to act accordingly. That our liberties are more important than the convenience of the government.

      We are trained to behave as if the law is something crafted by masters of philosophy and reason. That the enforcers are going to be in the right and behave with proper restraint. uncorrupted by their authority. That the jurors will weigh that the defendant broke both the letter of law, and will ensure that the the law itself is appropriate. This is clearly not the case, laws are often made for the personal gain of those with access to power. Police misconduct videos are released at a rate that is truly alarming, a couple police ruining the name of the bunch is still the cry I see over and over. However the number of times this has been caught on video leads me to believe that this is something that is seriously undermining their credibility. After cases like Genarlow Wilson, it appears that the jury has been trained to disregard their primary purpose- determining if the defendant committed a crime that warrants the punishment being let out.

      I'm getting tired of all the training, it needs to stop

      Storm

    7. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by Kral_Blbec · · Score: 5, Insightful

      That sounds very logical, and well stated, but the over all gist of it is unfortunately incorrect. Your entire basis is on the claim that the common man is too stupid to understand the complexities of modern society and politics. The truth is rather than they have been told that there is no need to learn it, although they could if they tried. They have also been purposefully lied to and abused by the political leaders so that rather than the average citizen delegating more duty to the government, the government simply assumes control.
      I don't believe that society is such much more complex than in the past that peoples brain's are exploding. I still have faith in the potential of the average person to learn a vast amount more than they currently do. Its just a matter of them actively choosing not to and being told that they don't need to. Sports, movies, fashion etc all take up too much of their time that could and should be spent in more constructive pursuits.
      Pork barrels and earmarks also aren't the result of amateur politicians messing around with something they don't understand. They are the result of professional politicians knowing that they can get away with it because people have become accustomed to it.

    8. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by Nefarious+Wheel · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I suspect that Al-Queda sends an idiot through the airlines once in a while to get caught, just to keep the TSA's attention focused there. Personally I'd be looking at vulnerable civil infrastructure by now, totally ignoring risks to flight - they're covered. That's not going to happen again, they've used that one up.

      But while we're looking at the airports, how safe is our water supply? How disruptive would destroying the civil sewerage system be? Infecting a single beef feedlot? I think it's time to wake up and think about other ways the bastards could get at us.

      --
      Do not mock my vision of impractical footwear
    9. Re:The "enhanced" procedures are useless by sjames · · Score: 5, Funny

      The terrorists will be mobbed and trampled.

      "HE'S got a BOMB!!!"

      OMG!!! Can I get it giftwrapped?

      I NEED three. Does it come in blue?

      I was here first, go find your own bombs!!!

  4. Stop focusing on the negative already! by Fluffeh · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Here at the TSA, we dislike the way that you are focusing on our mistakes. Yes, we make mistakes, but so does everyone else.

    We just happen to be in a position that allows us to have X-Ray vision and check out all the bits that people cover up. I mean seriously, how many times as a kid did you wish to have a pair of X-Ray glasses to check out your neighbor? Well, it's just like that! But we can!

    So, please, stop focusing on the bad, just because WE have a toy that you DON'T doesn't mean that you should try to take it away from us!

    Now, excuse me, there is a hot chick coming. I need to check her very carefully for explosives and hidden things.

    *sips coffee*

    --
    Moved to http://soylentnews.org/. You are invited to join us too!
  5. And let's just clarify a few things. by khasim · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The TSA has not yet caught a single terrorist attempting to get on a plane.

    The TSA is NOT the "last line of defense". The last line of defense will be the other passengers on the flight.

    If the TSA really thought that your bottle of water was a bomb then why don't they treat you like a person who just attempted to smuggle a bomb onto the plane?

    The TSA is useless at their stated mission.

    1. Re:And let's just clarify a few things. by lightbox32 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      If the TSA really thought that your bottle of water is a threat, would they have you chug it into a container not 5 feet from them?

      --
      A camel is a horse created by a committee
    2. Re:And let's just clarify a few things. by orangepeel · · Score: 5, Informative

      Ridiculous?

      Air marshal leaves plane after dropping bullets

      Passenger Finds Loaded Ammunition Clip on Southwest Flight

      US air marshal leaves gun in airport restroom

      Air Marshal Causes International Incident

      Air Marshal Accused of Rape at Gunpoint

      Marshals Fight Battle in Air and on Ground

      From that last article:

      "How would you describe the management in the air marshal service?" CBS News chief investigative correspondent Armen Keteyian asked a current air marshal.

      "Sexist, racist, homophobic, anti-disabled vet group, grossly incompetent," said the marshal, whose identity was concealed. "That's the general consensus among air marshals."

      Nearly two dozen current or former marshals have told CBS News the agency is dominated by an "old boys club" of white, male supervisors -- mainly ex-secret service agents who, they allege, routinely discriminate, intimidate and retaliate against employees who question their actions or authority.

      "This behavior has just spread like a cancer and it's out of control," the marshal said.

      Well ... it sounds like you called it right: ridiculous.

      --
      Whoever designed level 61 in Frozen Bubble is a sadistic bastard.
  6. They arent looking for terrorists by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Interesting

    An illegal search is admissible as evidence when a 'private entity' has conducted it.

    They are looking for drugs, because a cop can't without probable cause.

    This is the same reason they wanted to set up a program to have postal employees peeking in your windows.

    The fourth amendment is seen by LEO as a roadblock to 'unlimited' revenue based on property seizure.

    Pistole, the other day, in bragging about the effectiveness of the scanners, couldn't help mentioning the drug seizures and heroin needle it had detected.

    Cop makes his bust, LEO gets his seized house, car, boat, etc to auction. At the very worst, some minimum wage high school dropout nobody of a TSA agent takes any possible legal heat.

  7. Re:Security Theater, a comedy in 5 acts. by larry+bagina · · Score: 5, Funny

    I've got a fever and the only prescription is more government!

    --
    Do you even lift?

    These aren't the 'roids you're looking for.

  8. Re:Still getting over penis-shock. by RenHoek · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Well I don't know about you but I was in India several years ago when they bombed Jaipur. Even then, returning at Delhi airport to go home, the screeners were shocked I took off my boots and put them on the conveyor belt. Also _everybody_ had a few 1 liter bottles of water. You can't really go long without water in the summer in India. Just to illustrate, at the same time, the USA and Great Britain were confiscating toothpaste and nail clippers.

    Also, as an engineer, I can come up with 10 super effective ways to commit terror acts at the airport without even going through the screening process. Because as an engineer it's my job to find solutions to puzzles. And I'm not the smartest cookie in the jar. That means that any person who'd want to do real harm can just as easily come up with the same things I can come up with.

    It's 100% theater. And knowing this, still being forced through the procedures just pisses me off as a law abiding citizen.

  9. Re:winning the war on toursim by Korin43 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    We can never go back because just like (most)everything that's wrong with this country it's not about what's right. It's about what makes profit for the rich.

    That's what confuses me about this. Why haven't airline lobbyists stopped this yet? Do they not realize that everyone hates flying now?

  10. I'm not surprised they missed the razor blades... by Rhodri+Mawr · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...they are a cutting edge technology after all.

  11. Re:Let's clarify one more thing by mabhatter654 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    exactly, the recent case of the guy who had to live with peeing in a bag. He tried to request they be careful, or even ASK what they wanted.. until they squeezed his bag of piss all over him. The entire point what that THEY didn't want to be told what to do, THEY didn't want to pay attention, they wanted to prove a point... and they did... he inconvenienced them and they made him miss his flight and embarrassed him in public. The whole thing is a clear example that THEY DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK, they are going to do this ANYWAY especially BECAUSE you don't like it.

    If the TSA and FAA was really serious, they would do like the medical centers and consult with Disney and the amusement park industry for how to handle large volumes of people quickly, safely, and respectfully. Getting a few hundred people an hour on a plane should be a piece of cake. Amusement parks put thousands of people per day into tiny carts standing in the hot July Sun, quickly and safely. Why can't multi-Billion dollar airlines? Because they don't have to CARE that's why. There is no excuse for the deplorable mess mass transportation is right now, especially because airports have near complete control of passengers... it's their own petty bureaucracies they can't control.