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What's In Steve Ballmer's Inbox?
Barence writes "When Microsoft last year launched Outlook.com, the company carelessly left the SteveBallmer@Outlook.com address vacant. It was snapped up by the editor of PC Pro, giving an insight into the type of emails the public sends to the Microsoft CEO. Among the messages sent to the account are complaints about the Windows 8 interface, a plea from someone who was 'literally driven crazy' by Windows Server product keys, and someone who wants Windows Phone's calendar to remind him when he's being paid. There's also a more sinister complaint from someone who claims they were the victim of racial discrimination when applying for a job at a Microsoft Store."
ikea adverts. He has to replace chairs.
I have a catch-all inbox that I use for various disposable e-mails. It's a popular domain.
In a typical week I get: ...
- 10+ people trying (and succeeding) creating FB accounts plus any updates and invites and comments and
- ~5 e-mails from Gmail to activate an account
- ~5 e-mails from Windows Live to activate an account
- two library notifications about overdue books
- a backup of the financial database from a company that has set the incorrect e-mail
- Someone sending baby pictures of their newborn child to a co-worker to a similarly-named company
- ~4 e-mails from patients for another similarly-named clinic
- One or two e-mails from an insurance company with confidential data sent to the incorrect domain
- LOTS of e-mails from people signing up on web sites that don't verify e-mails (horroscopes, matching sites, industrial newsletters, etc)
Xmas was pretty busy with a lot of kids registering WIndows Live accounts for their XBOX. ...
Out of courtesy I usually tell people that they have the wrong domain
Wearing pants should always be optional.
I thought 98 and 2000 were decent OSes. 95, however, had some issues. Also, how do you determine if Vista, XP, Me, NT and CE are even or odd numbered? You can't go by the marketing name. And you can't go by the internal version number, as Vista and 7 are both version 6 (8 may be as well, I haven't looked).
And every other version of Office, Visual Studio, and everything else they've ever released. We learned about the "Microsoft cycle" as a legitimate thing in college. They release something actually good, people buy it, and MS thinks they're invincible. Then they do something unpopular and experimental and think they can get away with it because their sales on the last version were unstoppable. Then it fails miserably, everyone gets fired, and they release something the customers actually want. I have a feeling that Windows 9 is going to end this cycle though because it sounds like it will be awful.
Lots of SPAM advertising Dancing Monkey Man brand Anti-Persperants (Zoo Strength). For those on the go who feel the need to jump around on stage like an angry gorilla but don't want to be embarrassed by sweat marks..
I once worked for a university IT department, where a lot of us still retained our old "not everyone needs e-mail" addresses well in to the late 90's, such as simple tom@school.edu, bob@school.edu, and so on. One day our rather red-faced director, "Steve", came out to us and said it may be time for everyone to adopt the current "jsmith" standard, and told how a young woman on campus had just sent a quite amorous e-mail to her boyfriend, also name of "Steve", but she only put his first name in the To: field.
From: Jsvalbreijkaloua@ikea.com
Subject: Holiday Sale - Select Chairs 75% Off
From: amanda.good@monster.com
Subject: Developers! Developers! Developers!
From: rstallman@fsf.org
Subject: RE: UEFI - See you in court.
From: j.allen@rbc.com
Subject: SCO still alive!?! Please wire more money!
From: bgates@microsoft.com
Subject: Dude, wtf windows 8? Investors want to know.
From: Larry.Page@gmail.com
Subject: Windows Phone LOLOLOL
From: rvstrejklisauke@nokia.com
Subject: RE:Meeting with Larry Page - not so good
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Just by getting their complaints published, emailing to the fake Ballmer was probably far more effective than emailing to the real one would have been.
Why not? There are more than just one Steve Ballmer on this planet no doubt.
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It's actually steve.ballmer@gmail.com ;)
Haven't we all done this at some point?
I did it for a local football club who wouldn't stop sending me SMS texts.
After the third attempt, I received two 'out of office' replies and knew I'd hit the jackpot. That taught me a big lesson about setting those damn things. I learnt that jane.bloggs@footballclub.com was on maternity leave and joe.bloggs@footballclub.com was out of the country for the rest of the week. Joe was high up in the company and probably had nice stuff in his house.
The SMS texts stopped. Job done for the price of three emails, and a name-scrape from a website.
This post contains benzene, nitrosamines, formaldehyde and hydrogen cyanide.
Don't me bro!
People write THE HEAD HONCHO of a multinational corporation with their (in his eyes most certainly seen as) petty complaints about the OS his company makes? Do they REALLY think that he wastes a nanosecond reading them? That he himself does actually care what they think of his product?
Is that the same kind of people who want to talk to "the manager", thinking that he gives half a shit about their ramblings?
I found via my life that people will complain about anything to someone that is in charge of whatever. They will bitch about everything. Most people seem to be whiny bitches that have to get their way with everything and don't care about others.
Plus most the public is pretty stupid.
Be seeing you...
Depends on the person in charge and the customer. If that customer is someone who spends half a fortune and then some on my goods and complains about a store clerk bumping into him and then being an ass towards him, I will very much offer him an apology and demand one from the clerk in question, as well as some kind of goodie to get him back on my good side.
If it's the average high-complaint idiot that buys a 2.99 item from the bargain bin and feels entitled by that investment to be carried around by my employees on a golden throne, I kick him out with the request to shop at my competitor.
We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
Actually, with Windows, both the even and the odd versions are bad. As are the non-numerical versions...
Complaining to a senior company executive can be a very effective tool. One, most people these days read their own email. Two, they have PAs who can do stuff. I've done it a couple of times when I've run out of other options, and saved a lot of bother.
[FUCK BETA]
every time I read "smart quotes", I picture Doctor Evil making "air quotes".
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff