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Companies Wake Up To the Problem of Bullies At Work (wsj.com)
Reader cdreimer writes: According to a report in The Wall Street Journal (possibly paywalled), two-thirds of Americans have reported being bullied in the workplace in the last year (up from half in 1989) and boorish behavior by bosses and coworkers are causing companies in lost productivity. The report reads: One of the first things visitors notice when they enter the Irvine, Calif., offices of Bryan Cave LLP is the granite plaque etched with the law firm's 10-point code of civility. The gray slab, displayed in the law firm's reception area, proclaims that employees always say please and thank you, welcome feedback and acknowledge the contributions of others. Such rules may seem more at home in a kindergarten than a law firm, but Stuart Price, a longtime partner, says they serve as a daily reminder to keep things civil at work. Incivility -- and its more extreme cousin, bullying -- is becoming a bigger problem in workplaces. Nearly two-thirds of Americans reported that they were bullied at work last year, up from roughly half of workers in 1998, according to research conducted by Christine Porath, a management professor at Georgetown University's McDonough School of Business. These people reported they were "treated rudely at least once a month" by bosses or co-workers in the past year -- which Prof. Porath defined as being bullied.Bullying costs companies in ways large and small, cutting into productivity and turning off customers, management experts say. Workplace behavior is under the microscope after recent allegations of sexual harassment in Hollywood, technology and media. Some companies have found, as a result of investigations into harassment claims, that bullying and boorish behavior are more common than suspected.
"treated rudely at least once a month" by bosses or co-workers in the past year -- which Prof. Porath defined as being bullied.
That explains the ridiculous result right there. In other words, a load of garbage.
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It's not a secret that a toxic work environment reduces productivity. What exactly is taking place here that's new?
I'm pretty sure a lot of rules they have makes sense, but this one always makes me wonder what usefulness has something you *always* say in a communication. Besides becoming naturally desensitized, one has to ask what purpose does it serve that is more meaningful than explicitly recording the first digit in a normalized binary mantissa (which is always a one, logically). Humans are weird...
Ezekiel 23:20
When I look at what was considered bullying 20 years ago versus today I see a completely different standard. With all of the new perceived micro-aggression for bullying it is no wonder that the rate of it has spiked.
Back when I was in school, bullying was what an older kid did to the small nerdy ones like myself until I got some balls and went down on the ground. Bully never tried to mess with me again.
Nowadays, it sounds like bullying is someone getting mad at you for whatever reason. If you're underperforming at work, not showing up on time, delaying delivery of products, and/or costing the firm money you shouldn't be surprised if someone gets angry at you and tells your lazy ass to do work.
To be blunt, most of the "bullying" that my HR department deals with at work is really just catty female behavior. We've occasionally had to move them around the office to avoid this.
In reality, I just wanted to fire them both for arriving late and being slow to deliver on projects. Women are their own worst enemies.
(This is a repost of a comment from a previous bullying discussion.)
If you've experienced workplace bullying first hand then you know what a destructive force it is. Your workplace becomes a place of dread and fear. The stress becomes not just a part of your daily life, but a part of who you are as a person. It changes you.
My own experience of being bullied began when I took a job with a company that had just promoted a long-standing employee in to a management position. He had no experience of managing people, he received no training, and he openly said that he didn't want the job. He was visibly stressed almost constantly, and resented that he was still expected to work and not just manage other people's work.
Very early in the job I was shouted at in the middle of a busy office for completing a task that should have been cancelled. It was a foul-mouthed and very personal tirade of abuse, accusing me of being untrustworthy, and came totally out of the blue. Then my manager realised that he had forgotten to mark the task as cancelled, and quietly in a private room away from other staff, he apologised and promised never to speak to me like that in front of people again.
The details of bullying incidents are generally repetitive and boring, so suffice to say, this was just the beginning of what became regular abuse: Shouted at in the middle of the office for things I had allegedly done wrong, and then apologised to in private.
I put up with the abuse for way too long. I'd spoken to my union rep and kept a bullying diary as advised, but I never started a grievance procedure. Colleagues said I should, and one day I ended up talking to the company secretary about it, but I backed off, determined to resolve the issue myself. Ultimately, I told myself, this is a case of two grown men having a clash of personalities, and I should be able to resolve it. But of course I couldn't.
After about a year I had to take time off work for an unconnected health reason, which seemed to go on a lot longer than one might expect. After a week back at work, I was off again with flu, which seemed to go on forever. My doctor was puzzled and I was sent to the hospital for tests. But in conversation with my doctor one time I mentioned about how it was actually quite nice to be off work because it was an escape from the bullying, and it was as if I'd said the magic word. My doctor was certain that the stress of being bullied was the root cause of my poor health. It explained everything. It turns out that a year of sleepless nights and constant anxiety isn't very good for you.
When I finally had to take formal action against my manager, the company was combative, and handled it on the basis that I was making it all up. I opted for the least "official" form of grievance, third-party arbitration, and my manager held his hands up to what he'd been doing and promised to change. Whether he could or not, I don't know, as I've not been well enough to return to work yet.
(Iâ(TM)ve since left that job and my career has gone from strength to strength ever since.)
My wife has that same rule. Every night at bedtime I try to talk her into being more sexually adventurous, but she keeps coming back with that goddamn rule. I wish that book had never been written.
Two thirds of American's are little bitches.
...Spain, where they have clearly defined legal definitions of what constitutes work place bullying. They also have industrial tribunals with the power to fine companies and award substantial compensation to victims (tens of thousands of euros) for letting work place bullying going unaddressed. For an employee to pursue a tribunal for bullying against their employer is also free, recognising the fact that things have to get really bad before the vast majority of employees will consider legal action.
Debate is a form of harassment. Do not question my truth.
But, "being treated rudely at least once a month" is NOT the same as being bullied.
in the military it's called a code red and it's for training.
If you're getting legit bullied by an entrenched malicious psychopath or sadist, don't go to HR. They're in management's pocket and probably know the person is a SOB anyway. Get a body cam. Record that motherfucker. Create a montage of his or her patterned behavior. When you've had enough, make it understood that social media is a very powerful tool.
It's like cancer or Alzheimers, or any other awful thing: If you haven't lived through it, you really don't understand it. And it's real easy to sit around saying "why, little kid, why'd you let your father beat on you? if it had been me, I'd have punched him in the face and walked out!"
People that are prone to be sensitive and have increased leverage for political correctness reasons are themselves frequently bullies. Anyone that has been 6 years old will remember the child that cried to get another child in trouble. Anyone that watches sports will be aware that on occasion someone will pretend to be injured to encourage a referee to punish the opposing team.
We all know this because I assume we've all been 6 before and are aware of professional sports to some extent.
This plays out in the work place in much the same manner in that some people will pretend offense or emotional injury for personal gain or to spite someone they don't like.
There is a movement to discourage awareness of this element of the work place. And while some feel this creates a more welcoming environment for people to express problems... it also encourages abuse by those that don't mind pretending to manipulate their coworkers and employers.
One must be skeptical and reasonable either way. If you get a report... use your best judgement and try to appreciate what is possible and what you know. Naturally you don't want a hostile work environment. But you also don't want a hair trigger whine fest environment because that is also quite hostile.
In the one case you have some bully beating people up for their lunch money... in the other case you have your little sister Susie pretending some imaginary offense to get your mom to punish you... yes... I am intentionally using childish analogies here to get the point across.
I've decided to stop wasting my time responding to AC trolls/sockpuppets... so if you want a response from me... login.
If someone is curt or rude on occasion, it's not bullying. We're all human and have bad days. Of course no one should take out their personal problems on their coworkers or subordinates.But it's going to happen from time to time. No one is perfect. If your boss looses his temper from time to time, it really sucks. But unless they are doing this on a regular basis and/or actually threatening you, it's not bullying.
I know I can't be the only person on /. old enough to remember the grade school adage, "Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you."
Somewhat related: I've noticed a lot of talk in the last decade, possibly more than previously, of "Alpha" status being a positive quality. In other words, the idea that it's a good thing to be an "Alpha Male." Which I've found to be a little alarming, it feels like a return to the 80s "greed is good" mentality.
I'm sure there are different ways to describe these, but the way I heard it back in the day: an Alpha is someone who demands to be in charge, at the center of things. Essentially a bully. A Beta is someone is someone who is capable, but can lead or follow as the situation demands. And Gammas and Deltas are basically different flavors of people who get exploited.
Maybe that's subject to interpretation. I'm sure that there are more flattering definitions of what Alphas are, but the bully definition does seem to fit with most of the rhetoric - "If you're not demanding all that is best for you, you must be a weakling beta. Not a proper manly alpha, the way you should be."
So anyway, that's a long way of saying that I'm not surprised that bullying in the workplace might be increasing.
Your hurt feelings really aren't meaningful to anyone but you. And they aren't meaningful to you unless you let them be.
This is trivially false since there's a study about it, an article about it on the WSJ, a repost to slashdot and a bunch of people arguing here about it. You might not like it that other people apparently care, but that doesn't mean it isn't so.
SJW n. One who posts facts.
Total agree. In the old days, priests would fuck altar boys in the ass and no one would report it.Today, it's fashionable to complain about it rather than working with the person in a position of power, or in certain cases, around them.
At a particular IT job in telecom, there was this guy. Everyone knew he was as asshole. He decided to single me out and talk some serious shit. To make matters worse, he had this little group that followed him around. I came to think of them as "Mary's sheep". I was bewildered at first. I had never seen anything like this and was amazed that it was happening. On this amazement alone I let it slide and observed. However, I don't take shit from people. Further, I am violent when provoked. One day, I confronted him and his followers in the parking lot. I was surrounded by far more than enough coworkers to be fired over how that went down. But they got it. The end result was him and his merry band cowering in fear... and apologizing. Not only did it stop, his little group disbanded. He himself was later fired after going the every drawer in someone Else's desk like it was big deal, in front of about a dozen another people including a supervisor. No real point. Just my story. This was back in 2006 or so. For the record, there would have been no point in crying to management, except to make things worse.
Brought to you by Carl's Junior.
If being "rude" to someone is considered bullying then where does the passive-aggressive BS fall? Because I have worked with loads of people that might seem as nice as can be but that PA behavior is absolutely toxic. It is sneaky, underhanded, disingenuous and clearly designed to hurt and embarrass people. Yet it is tolerated, and sometimes even encouraged and rewarded, because on the surface it seems polite.
Sometimes I long for the days when you could just tell someone to fuck off. None of this "ohhh thank you Ed for your valuable contribution. We will certainly take that under advisement and devote to it all the attention it deserves.". In plain english, that's a stupid idea and I'm not going to spend another moment thinking about it. Now the first response might seem "nicer" but in fact it is phony and dishonest.
But you can't tell people to fuck off anymore or some snowflake is going to burst into tears and go running to HR. And then take two weeks off for "emotional distress". And then I get sent to "counseling" for an attitude adjustment. And everyone has to treat snowflake with kid gloves or we might just have a relapse. And all the other snowflakes in the office with circle the wagons and comfort the wounded snowflake with group hugs and empty words of encouragement.
Yeah - fuck off.
This ia obligatory at this point: http://assets.nydailynews.com/...
I mean REALLY Evil.
The most EVIL of all the Pizza toppings including the dreaded Anchovy.
California. Of course.
I do not believe in karma. "Funny"=-6. Do good and forbid evil. Yours, Oft-Offtopic Flamebaiting Troll.
People are rude and mean to each other all the time so if your boss does it doesn't mean anything.
love is just extroverted narcissism
not because I'm a bully, but because they're dumb as a fucking rock and the only way they finally get the point to stop asking the same GD questions is if I growl at them.
I don't mind the first question. Second time I'll tell you to write this down. Third time I'll tell you to refer to your notes and anytime after that, I'll probably yell at you for being stupid.
So I'll quit being mean to them when you quit hiring idiots.
If you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen. You can always work someplace with less pressure.
People that are prone to be sensitive and have increased leverage for political correctness reasons are themselves frequently bullies.
What absolute bullshit.
Bullies prey on the weak and vulnerable. Bullies will not act without overwhelming support because they are inherently cowards.
Pointless rant against "teh Pee Cees gone madddddssdzzzss" is pointless. You have no idea what bullying is, especially bullying in the workplace.
Bullying amongst colleagues is easy to define, saying or doing something you've been told not to because it's annoying, upsetting or interfering with a colleague. If you think that the colleague is being irrational that is 6 times the reason to fucking stop. You're an adult, act like it and move on. If you think the workplace is too "Pee Cees" then its likely you are the problem and should move to a more abusive workplace.
Bullying from managers is a bit different, it follows the same basic definition as above but also includes being given tasks that are far beyond your role or capabilities that the manager knows you will fail at.
In fact, from my experience its the people who read the Daily Mail and think "teh Pee Cees gone madddddssdzzzss" are more likely to be bullies due to their tenuous connection to reality. The rest of us not in La-La land know how not to take a joke too far and know that gauging an audience before telling one is paramount instead of expecting everyone to put up with whatever nonsense exudes from your piehole.
Oh, I'm sorry, was that too "Pee Cees" for you, here's a nice cup of Harden The Fuck Up princess. I've worked in blue collar jobs (it was doing shit kicker work 2 days a week that paid for my education) and management didn't want to hear about bullying. so the bullies who thought they were tough were the ones missing a tooth when someone finally had enough of their bullshit and hit them with a brick, this tended to shut them up pretty quick and they pretty much became social outcasts. Management ignored that also, sometimes I wish I could do this to some of my colleagues in the white collar world (pretty much the only thing I really miss from those days). I'm pretty tolerant of people who have differing views to me, but a few people are just arseholes and have a face missing a fist, Usually the same people that hold extreme Daily Mail type of views.
Calling someone a "hater" only means you can not rationally rebut their argument.
Implying I don't understand it?
Not sure I have the time to write it alldown: But here's a taste.
I was an effeminate boy child. Silky hair, delicate features. Cried easily. Got to live pretty much from as early as I can remember until late high school being mistaken for a girl accidentally ("and what will your daughter have to order?") to constant, pervasive bullying.
How about getting on the bus as a FIRST grader, proud of the new hat I got for Christmas, only to have a senior high schooler tear it from my head? When the bus driver finally got it sent back up front, someone had scrawled FAGGOT indelibly inside it.
How about having high schoolers cruising town routinely scream "FAGGOT" and "BUTTFUCKER" as they drove by?
How about my first year in a new school, when the local bully targeted me (the kid who just moved to town) as his victim du jour? Constant, routine humiliation that school officials either couldn't or wouldn't stop? Ending in a set-up fight (I tried to run away, but of course that wasn't allowed by the onlookers there for a show!) after school one day that led to him publicly kicking the shit out of me?
Maybe understand that I'm not speaking from the position of an arrogant dick who's never been there. I'm speaking from EXPERIENCE about the only way that I escaped that cycle of victimization.
-Styopa