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NPM Fails Worldwide With 'ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot' Error (bleepingcomputer.com)

Posted by msmash on from the oops-i-did-it-again dept.

Catalin Cimpanu, writing for BleepingComputer: Users of the NPM JavaScript package manager were greeted by a weird error yesterday evening, as their consoles and applications spewed a message of "ERR! 418 I'm a teapot" whenever they tried to update or install a new JavaScript/Node.js package. JavaScript developers from all over the world received the error, and not just in certain geographical regions. The bug did not affect all users, but only those behind a proxy server.

124 comments

  1. You gotta wonder by Zephyn · · Score: 4, Funny

    How many people saw that error message and thought to themselves, "This Internet of Things concept is getting way out of hand."

    1. Re:You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      The 418 code was an April 1st joke, it really should not be in the codebase of any serious web application...

    2. Re:You gotta wonder by arth1 · · Score: 4, Informative

      If you saw the error message, you used a command line interface with a proxy server, and thus were likely tech savvy. And then chances are you'd know about the 418 error code and RFC2324. It's 20 years old now, preceding IOT by quite a bit.

    3. Re:You gotta wonder by Lunix+Nutcase · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Well then good news. NPM isn’t a serious web application. It’s an amateur hour piece of software.

    4. Re: You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's WWW tech. So that is already implied nowadays.

      I wonder when the next layer will grow on top of web-* which grew on top of proper IP protocols and native applications.
      Can someone imagine somthing dumber than even WebSockets and the "living standard" oxymoron?

    5. Re:You gotta wonder by DontBeAMoran · · Score: 1

      It's nothing compared to "YouTube error 583, I'm a giraffe", which has affected 1.2 million users.

      --
      #DeleteFacebook
    6. Re: You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Error 418 is an official iana error code

    7. Re:You gotta wonder by rahvin112 · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Yet it's used directly by millions of people every day and with major applications. This is the problem with these hosted javascript scripts that people plug into their websites willy nilly. They are a shitshow where someone could gain access and plug malware into millions of websites and is a single point of failure. Not even going to touch the shitty programming parent alludes too. Anyone thinking of using this shit should pull copies and check it for security and code quality and host it on their own servers rather than just point to the script and load it dynamically.

      But that would be hard and who cares if it's hard. Funny thing is we just went through this a couple months ago when one of these major scripts hosting went down and it disabled 1/4 of the internet. You'd think people would learn from that.

    8. Re:You gotta wonder by devman · · Score: 1

      You can also use subresource integrity.

    9. Re:You gotta wonder by NicknameUnavailable · · Score: 1

      No real nerds fail to understand the meaning behind error 418, but the beasts will never understand.

    10. Re:You gotta wonder by NicknameUnavailable · · Score: 1

      Yet it's used directly by millions of people every day

      Air is used by more and most of them are still fucking retarded.

    11. Re: You gotta wonder by FormOfActionBanana · · Score: 1

      Don't be a doofus. It is unassigned. https://www.iana.org/assignmen...

      --
      Take off every 'sig' !!
    12. Re:You gotta wonder by gweihir · · Score: 1

      Better than "lp0 on fire", now that might wake a few people up. Unfortunately, AFAIK, there is no HTTP error code for that.

      --
      Most ACs are not even worth the keystrokes to insult them. Be generically insulted by this and ignored otherwise.
    13. Re: You gotta wonder by Z00L00K · · Score: 1

      Because http wasn't invented when lp0 was created.

      --
      If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
    14. Re:You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yet it's used directly by millions of people every day and with major applications.

      1. So is heroin.
      2. Just because eveyone else jumped off a bridge....

    15. Re: You gotta wonder by Lunix+Nutcase · · Score: 1

      No it’s not. Also it was part of a yearly joke RFC.

    16. Re:You gotta wonder by q_e_t · · Score: 2

      I presume it is a panic that alludes to Tim Brooke-Taylor in The Goodies.

    17. Re: You gotta wonder by Medievalist · · Score: 2

      RFC 2324 section 2.3.2 assigns error 418 as follows:

      Any attempt to brew coffee with a teapot should result in the error code "418 I'm a teapot". The resulting entity body MAY be short and stout.

      So as long as NPM is RFC2324 compliant, that's a perfectly cromulent error code. :)

    18. Re: You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      An RFC is not a standard - itâ(TM)s a proposal asking for review and comments.

    19. Re:You gotta wonder by Carewolf · · Score: 3, Funny

      Well then good news. NPM isn’t a serious web application. It’s an amateur hour piece of software.

      No it is obviously a teapot.

    20. Re:You gotta wonder by kevingolding2001 · · Score: 1

      So I guess Google is not a serious web application then.

      http://www.google.com/teapot

    21. Re: You gotta wonder by Lunix+Nutcase · · Score: 2

      It is a regrettably well spread misconception that publication as an
            RFC provides some level of recognition. It does not, or at least not
            any more than the publication in a regular journal. In fact, each
            RFC has a status, relative to its relation with the Internet
            standardization process: Informational, Experimental, or Standards
            Track (Proposed Standard, Draft Standard, Internet Standard), or
            Historic. This status is reproduced on the first page of the RFC
            itself, and is also documented in the periodic "Internet Official
            Protocols Standards" RFC (STD 1).

      https://tools.ietf.org/html/rf...

      Now let’s go to the I’m a Teapot RFC:

      Status of this Memo

            This memo provides information for the Internet community. It does
            not specify an Internet standard of any kind. Distribution of this
            memo is unlimited.

      So basically you’re wrong as can be.

    22. Re: You gotta wonder by Lunix+Nutcase · · Score: 1

      And the person is double fail since that RFC even states it’s not a “standard of any kind.”

    23. Re: You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Fuck you, puritanical turd.

    24. Re: You gotta wonder by gweihir · · Score: 1

      HTTP could have been backwards compatible...

      --
      Most ACs are not even worth the keystrokes to insult them. Be generically insulted by this and ignored otherwise.
    25. Re: You gotta wonder by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      WHOOOOOOOOSH!

      Work on your reading comprehension (in particular, figure out what RFCxxxx-compliant means) or else get a sense of humor.

      Either choice will work! ;)

  2. ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Short and Stout!

    1. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Here is my handle,
      Now watch me bug out.

    2. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by Oswald+McWeany · · Score: 1

      Short and Stout!

      That's not a teapot, that's a beer glass.

      --
      "That's the way to do it" - Punch
    3. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by syn3rg · · Score: 3

      IMAO, a beer glass should never be short. The contents, however, may be stout.

      --
      The contents of this message have been doubly encrypted by ROT13
    4. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It comes in PINTS???

    5. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by SuricouRaven · · Score: 1

      You are not familiar with the classic British beer glass? It is short. It is also wide. They have largely disappeared from pubs these days, as they are expensive to replace and make excellent brawling weapons.

    6. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by K.+S.+Kyosuke · · Score: 3, Funny

      Short and /dev/stdout?

      --
      Ezekiel 23:20
    7. Re:ERR! 418 I'm a Teapot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Short /dev/stdout's only open more ports for those of us willing to stdin.

  3. I'm too oldschool. by jellomizer · · Score: 2

    I like to download my Javascript Framework and have it linked to the internal web-server.
    Just for the sake that I don't want an extra point of failure. (Like this) Then you have a to worry about if the bigger target site got hacked and altered the Node.js file to do some nasty stuff from the file.

    Other then getting updates automatic. What is the point?

    --
    If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
    1. Re:I'm too oldschool. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Javascript framework nothing. Now get off my lawn and go back to school: It's "other than".

      In other news, the summary is ever more blatant clickbait for bleepingcomputer. Just fuck off already, msmash.

    2. Re:I'm too oldschool. by El+Cubano · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I like to download my Javascript Framework and have it linked to the internal web-server.

      That is not old school. It is the difference between being an amateur programmer and a professional software developer/engineer. To be clear, deploying anything meaninfgul into production based on drawing dependencies form a source which do not trust or directly control is an amateur move.

      For anything more complex than school/hobby project, and for every professional project, I make it a point to ensure the stability and availability of the dependencies. In some cases that might be as simple as ensuring the libraries are available and suitable as is in the Linux distro package repo (I generally trust Debian, RHEL, and Suse for stuff like this). In the case where the packages are not available or they are only available from a potentially unreliable source (Fedora, NPM, CPAN, Maven central, RubyForge, etc.) I make sure to make a local copy (either stand up my own repository or incorporate the depednecny into source control directly). That way I can be assured that the dependency continues to be available to and working when I need.

      Granted, doing that means that one accepts the burden/responsibility of keeping the depedency up to date and tracking the vendor/upstream security advisories. But then, that is why (good) software developers/engineers get paid well.

    3. Re:I'm too oldschool. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      nodejs is not just for front end frameworks.

    4. Re:I'm too oldschool. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm oldshool.

      I write my server side code in C, and my CGI lib is fucking bulletproof since the functions are ancient and have been hammered on for decades.

      I write my client side code in C and use Emscripten to compile my code to ASM.js (will target Web Assembly in future). Since I have a C complier targeting browsers this means I can use ANY FUCKING SOFTWARE I WANT on either the client or server since EVERYTHING is written in C. All of today's "self hosting" languages bootstrap themselves using C...

      Get off my lawn, skiddie.

    5. Re: I'm too oldschool. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm oldschool. I write my own assembler. Yet I embed it in Haskell, since C-likes are mind-limiting cancer.

      Now what?
      Did I win your snobbery game?

      And for the record: Yes, the entire "web" inner platform is idiotic.

    6. Re:I'm too oldschool. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What is the point?>

      Isn't it obvious? It's there to check for and circumvent (disable) proxy servers... We need a way to connect without the ISP ball and chain.

    7. Re:I'm too oldschool. by TheDarkMaster · · Score: 4, Insightful

      This. Oh boy, this. I'm fucking sick of seeing all these websites developed in this completely amateur way using javascripts files from several external sources to the site itself where each of them is a potential source of problems and security breaches, and this is not to mention the cases where these scripts call other scripts from other sites that in turn also call other scripts in a lunatic chain of operations to do things that should be contained within the original site.

      --
      Religion: The greatest weapon of mass destruction of all time
    8. Re:I'm too oldschool. by jellomizer · · Score: 2

      "I write my server side code in C" Leaving you programs open to buffer overflow and memory leaks.
      "my CGI lib is fucking bulletproof since the functions are ancient and have been hammered on for decades" So it is relatively simple.
      "I write my client side code in C and use Emscripten to compile my code to ASM.js " So you code a low level language and compile it to a high level language?
      "Since I have a C complier targeting browsers this means I can use ANY FUCKING SOFTWARE I WANT on either the client or server since EVERYTHING is written in C. All of today's "self hosting" languages bootstrap themselves using C..." Assuming of course you have the source, and any particular library that will actually work for your platform.

      I have found such developers who call themselves old school and do all this stuff, are just less likely to learn something new. C has its place, However the browser more "Natively" uses JavaScript. And either you take a long time to do development, or your set of tools that you have build over a decade is the equivalent of one of those fancy new language.

      Back in the early/mid 1990's I did my stuff in C, because that was the only good option. Later in my career I have started to use higher level languages. Just because it allows me to write code quickly, and other junior developers are able to pick up and maintain the program, after I have done all the heavy legwork.

      I have had a strong track record of over 20 years web development, I never had to deal with a successful hack, and some of my code has been heavily hit. However I don't claim it is bullet proof, it is as good as I can make it.

      However NPM links to JavaScript files never seemed to explain what the real benefit is.
      I only see two advantages:
      1. Security Patches can be applied seamlessly.
      2. If your hosting is limited, having these relatively big JS files downloaded form an other site can save on bandwidth.

      But these are small issues. But I see the costs much more then the benefits.

      --
      If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
    9. Re:I'm too oldschool. by jellomizer · · Score: 1

      "But then, that is why (good) software developers/engineers get paid well."
      Of course your bosses who get paid better will tell you to do it the stupid way, because they don't want to accept risk. They much rather see the customers not be able to work and have someone else to blame. Then have an overall higher update, but take blame when there is an issue.

      --
      If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
    10. Re:I'm too oldschool. by aaarrrgggh · · Score: 1

      I love it. Makes it easier to block all the useless shit with noscript...

    11. Re:I'm too oldschool. by HiThere · · Score: 1

      You make an interesting commentary on rust.

      --

      I think we've pushed this "anyone can grow up to be president" thing too far.
    12. Re:I'm too oldschool. by K.+S.+Kyosuke · · Score: 1

      I have found such developers who call themselves old school and do all this stuff, are just less likely to learn something new.

      That will probably be important once "something new" appears. So far the software industry at large is catching up with computing infrastructure research of the 1980s.

      --
      Ezekiel 23:20
  4. Proving Once and for All by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    It's never oolong before working in javascript stabs programmers right in the puer!

    1. Re:Proving Once and for All by BronsCon · · Score: 1

      I tea what you did there.

      --
      APK quotes people (including myself) without context and should not be trusted. Just thought you should know.
    2. Re:Proving Once and for All by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I tea what you did there.

      The pot calling the kettle black.

  5. Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I guess with open source software anybody can contribute trolls and backdoors into the software...

    1. Re:Open source trolls? by Spinlock_1977 · · Score: 1, Informative

      Do your research before anonymously flinging mud please. HTTP 418 is a legitimate error code: https://developer.mozilla.org/...

      --
      - The Kessel run is for nerf herders. I can circumnavigate the entire Central Finite Curve in a lot less than 12 parse
    2. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

      It is a legitimate error code only if the device is an actual teapot and was asked to brew coffee. That is not the case in this situation, and the error code is being misused.

    3. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Do your research before anonymously flinging mud please. HTTP 418 is a legitimate error code: https://developer.mozilla.org/...

      Legitimate? Oh wise one, please explain for us plebs how we're supposed to be using the Hyper Text Coffee Pot Control Protocol. I'm dying to know how you get your BREW commands to percolate.

      Clearly you didn't GET that this was based on a fucking 20-year old April Fools joke. The true mistake was allowing RFC 2324 to exist beyond a stained napkin.
        It should be revoked, because it's as worthless as your feedback here.

    4. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's an april fools joke. Being a joke doesn't confer it legitimacy even if it's hard coded or even if it shows up in an rfc.
      You know who's going to care if you failed to correctly implement the 418 error in your web-enabled teapot?
      Nobody, except autistic rule-fetishizing manbabies.

    5. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Do your research before anonymously flinging mud please. HTTP 418 is a legitimate error code: https://developer.mozilla.org/...

      It is not legitimate at all. Check the official docs, not Mozilla's: https://www.w3.org/Protocols/rfc2616/rfc2616-sec10.html

    6. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      418 would match 4XX. The RFC doesn't specify that ONLY listed 4XX are valid. Therefore, it is legitimate.

    7. Re:Open source trolls? by FormOfActionBanana · · Score: 1

      It is unassigned, asshat. https://www.iana.org/assignmen...

      --
      Take off every 'sig' !!
    8. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      418 would match 4XX. The RFC doesn't specify that ONLY listed 4XX are valid. Therefore, *YOU* are the father!

      (Apologies to Maury and his daytime show)

    9. Re:Open source trolls? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It should be revoked, because it's as worthless as your feedback here.

      It proved you wrong, which is quite worth while if still not a difficult thing to do.

  6. Best 400 Error Code! by Murdoch5 · · Score: 1

    418 is by far the best 400 code you can generate and it's hilarious!

  7. I felt a great disturbance in the javascript by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced

    1. Re:I felt a great disturbance in the javascript by arth1 · · Score: 2

      and were suddenly silenced

      No, that would be the 451 error code.

    2. Re:I felt a great disturbance in the javascript by SuricouRaven · · Score: 1

      I've encountered the 451 code myself, when making a web crawler: It's the code that the ipfs.io gateway will return if you request from it an object which is on their blacklist of things they have received takedowns for.

      That being IPFS though, it's trivial to just use another gateway.

  8. Time for a change in leadership by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

    There was zero response (that I could see) from the NPM team until a maintainer locked the thread and chided commenters for repeating that they too were receiving the error. This is the third or fourth time there's been a major issue that screws people relying on npm, and if the team hasn't fixed the process by now, it might be good to find a different team that can.

    1. Re:Time for a change in leadership by Galactic+Dominator · · Score: 2

      If NPM users haven't learned by now they can't rely on that infrastructure, then maybe it's time to review your process. Live by the upstream, die by the upstream. Therefore I host my own upstream.

      --
      brandelf -t FreeBSD /brain
  9. Trivial Projects Require Frameworks by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    It seems the more trivial the project, the more complex of a framework it requires.

    "Project Bang, requires Kong, to Compile Throng, to make lint to compile druffle to enable truffle to fluffle the socksifer."

    100s of Mbs of crap to compile some trivial program, sometimes even GBs of other crapware that will only be used once.

    This is why snaps and containers are awesome, I don't pollute my system with crap, and I can remove it at the drop of a hat.

    Whatever happened to "make"?

    Then again, I just answered my own question. I'd rather deal with a huge download once, than manually purging my system of crap.

  10. RFC 2324 by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is where error code 418 is defined.

  11. Don't make tea in a coffee pot by jfdavis668 · · Score: 1

    You wouldn't get that error if you made coffee. You can't make tea in a coffee pot!

    1. Re:Don't make tea in a coffee pot by jfdavis668 · · Score: 1

      I think I got that backward. You can't make coffee in a tea pot.

    2. Re:Don't make tea in a coffee pot by HiThere · · Score: 1

      Sure you can also make coffee in a teapot. You can either use instant, or add a raw egg to the grounds.

      --

      I think we've pushed this "anyone can grow up to be president" thing too far.
  12. To be expected. by Gravis+Zero · · Score: 2

    This what happens when you model your software after a house of cards.

    --
    Anons need not reply. Questions end with a question mark.
  13. This is why by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I rely on other people's code as little as possible.

    1. Re:This is why by jfdavis668 · · Score: 1

      That's it, I'm writing my own OS, network stack, web server, database server, etc. I'll be up and running in about 20 years.

    2. Re:This is why by OrangeTide · · Score: 1

      That's my plan as well. I started my web server OS + compiler project in 1997, and I'm way behind.

      (honestly NaviServer/AOLserver sort of filled my needs at the time and I never got around to doing my own project, even though it sounds amazing on paper. Then I discovered Inferno and realized my ideas weren't anything new)

      P.S. Luvit is a Lua-based NodeJS-like server and could probably be ported to run bare metal ESP32 or RPi. So for the crazy hyper-DIY coder that model might be feasible in only 5-10 years instead of 20.

      --
      “Common sense is not so common.” — Voltaire
    3. Re:This is why by q_e_t · · Score: 1

      I'm starting with emacs and will be done in three

  14. yeah, I did that. by Thud457 · · Score: 1

    You can't, but I bet Jim Holden can.

    --

    the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

  15. Found the LUDDITE! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Funny

    Only apps can app apps, and modern appy app apps apped 418 apps while apping other apps!

    Apps!

    1. Re:Found the LUDDITE! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      you're a fucking apphole

  16. Didn't NPM fuck up a while ago as well? by wardrich86 · · Score: 1

    IIRC there was something wonky with their Github page a few months ago (maybe last year) that caused a bunch of trouble.

  17. Nerds... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Nerds... 'Nuff said.

  18. Re:Java FTW! by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

    No, no, no. As OS written in Javascript...running on a hypervisor also written in Javascript...all of which have their code residing on random shares setup on game consoles.

    --
    John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
  19. prinrter error imsert cheeseburger by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Some or our printers have custom messages set.

    insert cheese burger = for most messages or errors
    load ketchup = toner
    wares the beef = load paper

    1. Re:prinrter error imsert cheeseburger by HornWumpus · · Score: 1

      Worked with a thumper back in DOS days.

      I flashed her computer's bios. 'Adopt, retry, fail? Complete waste of time, but better than working.

      --
      John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
  20. Re: Java FTW! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    We can store all the metadata in the blockchain for each access.

  21. Could be worse by iTrawl · · Score: 4, Funny

    Could have been: 419 I'm a Nigerian Prince.

    --
    "Everybody's naked underneath" -- The Doctor
    1. Re:Could be worse by Tablizer · · Score: 1

      I for one welcome our Nigerian teapot overlords.

      --
      Table-ized A.I.
    2. Re:Could be worse by PPH · · Score: 1

      Or ERR 420: Dude! What?

      --
      Have gnu, will travel.
    3. Re:Could be worse by q_e_t · · Score: 1

      Dude where's my JavaScript?

  22. Short and stout by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    nt

  23. Why? by SuricouRaven · · Score: 1

    Why does Javascript even need a repository? Between that, node.js and jquery, it's starting to look like someone has been reinventing the library stack with quickbasic at the foundation.

    1. Re:Why? by q_e_t · · Score: 1

      Shhh

  24. Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    APK Hosts File Engine 2.0++ 64-bit for Linux (GTK3 via FreePascal/Lazarus 1.8.2) yields more security/speed/reliability/anonymity vs. any SINGLE solution (99% of threats = hostnames vs. IP address (that most firewalls use)) more efficiently/FASTER + NATIVELY 4 less!

    (Vs. "Bolt on 'MoAr' illogic-logic" slowing you (hosts speed up 2 ways (adblocks + hardcodes u spend most time @)) loaded w/ bugs (DNS/AntiVir) + overhead (messagepass ('souled-out' to advertiser addons) + filtering drivers) & complexity leads to exploitation!

    * Vs. Win DelphiXE4 model? 10x faster (& ports to BSD/MacOS X too).

    E.G.-> 10 mill. line hosts merge 275mb=45 min. Daily intake ~20mb/750k line=5 min sorted/deduped/false positives + invalid tld/gtld gone + better architecture now (stringlist objects/no VCL processing).

    Windows model though accurate? Takes 12 hrs.++ to do that size merge & 20 min. on dailies.

    APK

    P.S.=> Per subject: Saw "code reuse" other than OS API backfire many times since 1982... apk

    1. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by EETech1 · · Score: 1

      APK Hosts File Engine 2.0++ 64-bit for Linux

      Link?

    2. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You were downmodded because you are offtopic. You are often downmodded because you are abusive. You are mocked because you are dumb and can't construct a valid sentence.

    3. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You're helpless against him and can't do better. Get your rhinoplasty, straighten your hair as you can't accept yourself JUDEN advertiser. You want others to accept you? Impossible. Your kind can't even accept how you look - hook nose ugly and short and fat! Your passover prayer and talmud says you want to kill us all? 6 million (lie it was less and more US men and Russians died with poles vs. your SCUMBAG inferior thief 'race' religion of piss colored shit) of you cooked and gassed alive shows history. Your history also shows you get banished or killed nation to nation through all history and everyone knows who owns advertising, hollywood, and banking and still you end up as fertilizer HOLY (self proclaimed) JUDE hahahaha. Why is that? You are a SUBHUMAN thieving juden monster is why and you know it.

    4. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      There is the APK we all know an love. Must of hit a nerve pointing out all the truth about him to set him off like that.

    5. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You constantly stalk him and try play innocent you cocksucking jew bitch? You're swine hated worldwide nobody can stand. Keep cutting off your noses and proving you can't even stand yourselves. All your stolen gold can't buy love. There is no love among demons like you and in my time on this world, I will see you all hang. Mark my words. Nobody can stand you shitbags which is why you keep getting sent to ovens or gaschambers or are banished nation to nation thru time immemorial. Why is that? Won't you tell us jewboy??

    6. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It is ok to claim your work APK. Everyone know it is you that posts this garbage. Show everyone who you really are in addition to being an incompetent fraud. We all know you are a weak little chicken shit and won't but we know it was you anyway.

    7. Re:Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Derek, apk let you show everyone what you are to your public humiliation you rat bastard punk weasel coward that ran https://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=12166080&cid=56698792/ as you stalk him by unidentifiable anonymous posts "big man" (not). I bet you're a scumbag jude. You act like one! They're all cowards like you Derek. A race of piss colored pussy thieving swine. Keep shooting your mouth off Derek. You'll end up dead in a garbage scow one day. Always happens to whimps like you Derek.

  25. Not very stout by Khyber · · Score: 1

    But then again, NPM and maintainers aren't known for being the brightest bulbs, either. I can think of four other times they've fucked up just in recent memory.

    --
    Still waiting on Serviscope_minor to wake up to fucking reality and realize that Jessica Price isn't going to fuck him.
  26. 7 proxies by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I am behind 7 proxies and was not affected.

    1. Re:7 proxies by q_e_t · · Score: 1

      And one proxy to bind them all?

  27. Ha ha ha! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Node.js fadsters got burned. I would play my tiny violin, but it got lost in my microservice AI blockchain.

  28. Teapot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    ...short and stout?

  29. Sorry for late reply (trolls harassing me)... apk by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    See subject & I posted it via email today to Mr. S. Burn of Malwarebytes' hpHosts who will MOST LIKELY answer back &/or post it soon on his site.

    * Alternately, email me @:

    apk4776239@hotmail.com

    I can send it YOUR WAY as an attachment in either tarball (.gz) form OR .zip file form (this is .1mb smaller)... for now. Link SHOULD be up @ Malwarebytes' hpHosts soon.

    APK

    P.S.=> Enjoy, & afaik from 2 weeks testing + w/ others, it's "Dead-Solid Perfect" & FAR faster vs. old Windows Delphi XE 4 one (it can be faster too, it's the underlying architecture change I did, no VCL GUI controls processing data now, & ALL non-visible StringList objects instead = faster! 64bit in Linux FreePascal produced a 3.8mb executable - DelphiXE4, nearly same # of codelines, made 7++ mb (go figure, seems to be a BETTER LINKER in Linux))... apk

  30. Why I write my OWN code (no 3rd party) by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    APK Hosts File Engine 2.0++ 64-bit for Linux (GTK3 via FreePascal/Lazarus 1.8.2) yields more security/speed/reliability/anonymity vs. any SINGLE solution (99% of threats=hostnames vs. IP address (that most firewalls use)) more efficiently/FASTER + NATIVELY 4 less!

    (Vs. "Bolt on 'MoAr' illogic-logic" slowing you (hosts speed up 2 ways (adblocks + hardcodes)) loaded w/ bugs (DNS/AntiVir) + overhead (messagepass ('souled-out' to advertiser addons) + filtering drivers) & complexity leads to exploitation!

    * Vs. Win DelphiXE4? 10x faster (& ports to BSD/MacOS X too)

    E.G.-> 10 mil. line hosts merge 275mb=45 min. Daily intake ~20mb/750k line=5 min sorted/deduped/false positives + invalid tld/gtld gone + better architecture (stringlists/no VCL processing).

    Windows model = 12 hrs.++ to do that mergesize & 20 min. on daily.

    APK

    P.S.=> REPOST vs. unidentifiable ac "downmods" vs. inevitability (/.ers want it) https://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=12166080&cid=56694732/ ... apk

  31. left-pad? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The getcookies fiasco was just a few weeks ago. You might be thinking of the left-pad debacle from 2016. NPM is very deeply flawed indeed.

  32. Correction by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Ugh, first link should be getcookies.

  33. Addendum: So, why'd I make this? Ok... apk by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Quote Kanye West: "We are drugged out! We are following other people's opinions (rather than educating ourselves & forming our own). We are controlled by the media - Today, it ALL changes! This 'reality' has been forced upon us. It is a choice, just like when I said slavery is a choice. Einstein said the definition of insanity is repeating the same mistake over & over again expecting different results. So we keep saying "I hate you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you" How're we gonna get a different result outta hate? Why don't we just TRY love? We have the resources for a peaceful world. You know, SOMETIMES you need some "crazy motherfuckers" to change something. Steve Jobs was crazy. Now we all on Steve Jobs' phones. They say Trump's crazy, they say I'm crazy but I'm here to show love. It's a bigger plan & I'm just doin' what the UNIVERSE told me..."

    FROM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OfAAS96g6eQ/ near its start & around 5:00 on the vidcontrol (repeated, it's a great message & one I've TRIED to live by for years now).

    APK

    P.S.=> ... & that's what I've always been about + why I built this program (I have the ability to hopefully effect good positive change for the ABSOLUTE good of all) - & it works more efficiently than ANY other SINGLE solution by itself w/ PROVEN tech (the IP stack itself)... apk

  34. Or... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You work in a corporate environment with a bunch of programmers who have a Masters in computer science and insist that they don't need to understand the underpinnings of the systems they're on because it's "abstracted" (several of which also insisted that transparent proxying isn't possible with HTTP/S).

  35. Re:Sorry for late reply (trolls harassing me)... a by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    We weren't harassing you, just pointing out the truth, exposing your lies, and showing everyone your bullshit. But I guess the truth hurts.

  36. LOL! Flurry of posts trying to 'bury this' by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    See subject: How "transparent" of you unidentifiable anonymous do-nothing "ne'er-do-well" FOOL. The inevitable occurs https://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=12166080&cid=56695008/ & "so it begins" - others will try & USE + LIKE my work (& your bs cannot stop it, I love it) https://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=12157390&cid=56692810/ - you're HELPLESS vs. me & you KNOW it...

    * :)

    (You're DO-NOTHING zero "ne'er-do-well" shit - & prove it, lol - thanks!)

    APK

    P.S.=> Vs. ME? YOU & 'Your kind' (disgusting losers) will ALWAYS lose - always (bet it KILLS you doesn't it? Look @ you "dancing" bitch - proves my point FOR me right there, lol)... apk

    1. Re:LOL! Flurry of posts trying to 'bury this' by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You keep posting those out of context quotes that when anyone looks into them finds out that your work isn't all you claim, that you are an asshole, and that you know jack shit. If that is what you have to show for praise you are a fucking dolt and your work must be garbage. The best thing someone has ever said about your work is that it manages to generate a correctly formatted hosts file but that isn't hard since you suck in a bunch of other people's properly formatted hosts files to begin with. Maybe you can post some more of your failures for everyone to see.

  37. http://john-goodman.cf/ by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    http://john-goodman.cf/

  38. Re: Java FTW! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    And all WebSockets should communicate via Reactive sloths

  39. MEET ME FACE TO FACE LIAR... apk by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    /.ers I quote said EXACTLY what I quote you LYING little do-nothing UNIDENTIFIABLE fuck & you can't change it w/ your lies - tell you what: MEET ME IN PERSON YOU LITTLE SHIT SO I CAN BREAK YOUR FUCKING JAW motherfucker...

    APK

    P.S.=> Come on PUSSY - you can't live up to showing you've done more or better than myself SO let's see how you stand up to me FACE TO FACE for your LYING BULLSHIT you little cocksucking bitch... apk

    1. Re:MEET ME FACE TO FACE LIAR... apk by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      APK the internet tough guy and great keyboard warrior. No body believes you when you have been shown to be a lying fraud. Your arguments get picked apart and destroyed constantly, your proof is shown to be made up, and your claims are shown to be wild speculation. No one fears you, everyone mocks you.

  40. Meet me face to face & say that pussy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Can't you read bitch? I'll meet you, face to face, & bust your fucking LYING jaw & make you eat your fucking teeth - where do you live?

    * Give me your address, name, & I'll verify it + come visit YOU cocksucker - we can settle this once & for all - ok pussy?

    APK

    P.S.=> You can't show you've done better than I, tell lies about me & stalk me? Motherfucker, I will assrape you... apk

    1. Re:Meet me face to face & say that pussy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No you wouldn't you are too weak and afraid and have the mentality of an 8 year old. Besides you claim you are smart and know who everyone is so you figure it out. Only a fool would willing tell you who they are as you will go to great lengths to harass and stalk people in the real world. You can't stand it when people point out the truth about you so you try to silence them any way you can but no one is buying it any more. If you don't like it when people expose your lies then stop posting. You make demands, challenges, and threats like the mentally ill street people. Time to let you sulk in your failure, I'm done now.

  41. Re:Java FTW! by K.+S.+Kyosuke · · Score: 1

    Replace "Java" with "Oberon" and you'll make me quite happy.

    --
    Ezekiel 23:20
  42. Been a pleasure showing everyone what u are by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Been a pleasure showing everyone what u are hypocrite that's stalking me is YOU. You can't show you've done better in computing & URA pussy ass punk bitch that when PUSH COMES TO SHOVE you run from a fair challenge - & I'm not playing here asswipe - I won't kill you, but I would have made you WISH you were dead (no joke/promise/Swear to God) but only 1 problem? A little snide weasel "ne'er-do-well" SHIT punk like you is already dead - you die a 1,000 deaths every single day as a TRUE fucking cowardly little bitch... & you KNOW it.

    * Now, best part is, since you won't tell me WHO you are, what your name is & your phone # so I can verify it IS/WAS really you? I can toss this into your weasel rat face everytime you continue to stalk me, bitch...

    ("You're DONE"? Motherfucker, you really are - you finished yourself publicly (now I want to REALLY FINISH YOU, privately - John Wayne "Quiet Man" style)).

    APK

    P.S.=> LOL, as always, I set you up like a bowling pin since you're stupid - I'm not here to 'play nice' OR politically correct w/ a punk like you - I am out to FIND you one day, & beat the FUCK out of you (& you can bank on it I will inevitably - you've earned it stalking me + lying about me & worse)... apk