Slashdot Mirror
Online Romance - For Good or Evil?
Kitsune Sushi submitted this hot potato: "There have been a few discussions the past few weeks on Slashdot regarding female geeks (probably set into motion at least in part by that Linux Chix article), most of which have been cluttered by a number of "interesting" comments by various males. :) One post that struck me in particular suggested that many male geeks have a hard time finding a romantic interest because their female counterparts are often found in the same place they are: behind their computer monitors. This sort of begs the question: where do most geeks (male or female) most often find their potential partner(s)? Online? Off? Chat rooms? Matchmaker services? University? LUGs? Hmm.. Slashdot..?" What are your experiences with online romances?
"As this notion has so thoroughly sparked my curiosity concerning the subject, any comments on where anyone has looked or what they have tried (and whether or not they have been successful as of yet) would be most welcome. It would certainly be interesting to note whether or not most Slashdotters spend most of their time on a computer, and exactly what seems to "work" for certain people with regards to romance. Perhaps the most interesting aspect of this conversation would be the following question: Has anyone ever met someone online and then moved to wherever they lived so the two of you could be involved in an actual relationship, and did it end up working out for the better?"
Angie and I started talking on the Trek forum on
Delphi. I subscribed to them because they were the
only people around at the time who offered no charge internet e mail. I think C$ charged 20 cents a piece or so.
Anyway, we met FTF, dated for a year, broke up for a while, dated for a while, broke up for a year, got back together, and got married on September 25, 1999. Six weeks.
Neither of us would do it again, but... We did get to talk A LOT before spent a great deal of time in each other's physical presence. That helped. It also helped both of us to be online, as we are both a bit shy in public.
I could go on for hours, but basically, it worked, was no harder (or easier) than meeting someone in real life, and it isn't something we'd recommend.
-George
Jesus was all right but his disciples were thick and ordinary. -John Lennon
Why was this posted at 8:14 on a Saturday night? Did you know you could get a good response from all of us non date enabled supergeeks :)
_________
Sometimes, when I'm feelin' bored, I like to take a necrotic equine and assault it physically.
_________
Sometimes, when I'm feelin' bored, I like to take a necrotic equine and assault it physically.
Atleast one couple was married online on the Userfriendly list (majordomo@lists.paralynx.com / subscribe userfriendly in the body). It works. There's plenty of HNGs (horney net geeks) out there to make it possible. I wouldn't however, recommend taking anything very seriously until you meet them IRL (duh).
--
Online relationships can work. Some people find a lot of happiness through them.
BUT THAT DOESN'T GIVE EVERY LONELY GEEK ON THE NET FREEDOM TO GO HARASS EVERYONE HE THINKS IS FEMALE IN AN ATTEMPT TO GET WHAT HE WANTS!
Having a lot of mud experience, I can say with certainty that there are a LOT of idiotic children out there who treat members of the opposite sex with incredible rudeness. How many women out there use male names in public forums to avoid unwanted attention?
Don't go sending obscene messages, ICQs, mudtells, or whatever to ANYONE. If you're interested in someone, propositioning them for cybersex just isn't going to get you anywhere except a long term relationship with spanky and his five friends.
Treat ladies with respect. Don't say or do anything you wouldn't do in real life in person in front of them. Behave. Treat them with respect, kindness, and understanding. Most of all, just be yourself. No one ever had a succesful longterm relationship pretending to be someone they're not.
Chip
"Then I'll tell the truth. We're allowed to do that in emergencies."
... And it's hard to break out of a lifetime's habits of shyness and discomfort around the opposite sex. I don't know why it's like that: when I hang around guys (and female friends) we can joke about and have a good time, but women seem (to me at least) to be fragile, where I have to mind my tongue and where everything I say or do is being evaluated. Paranoia? Most probably. I doubt it's out of fear anymore, more likely it's out of habit. I just have this feeling that I'm quite possibly one of the most peculiar people I've ever met, and have such a wide and varied range of tastes that I'm sure I'd offend any potential SO in one way or another (and have seemed to do so reliably since High School).. I also seem to attract psychos, and I'm not exaggerating when I say that. How about the young lady whom I met at a local tavern who gave me her email address, then after I sent a message, started sending me naked pictures of herself? So, I asked for a date or two and never heard from her again.. Or the gal whom I met in engineering class and would talk with and study with (oh boy, a nerd-girl, imagine my luck!) for months, lunching occasionally, then when I called to ask her out, her boyfriend picked up while he was cooking breakfast (either that or her ass was made of bacon because there was sizzling swine on the other end of that line).. Now am I the bad guy here? Am I reading too much into our lunchtime socializing? I wear deodorant and shower daily, I chew with my mouth closed, I wear clothes that are largely free of holes or stains and tend to be reasonably presentable (if monochromatic).. Am I screwing up the translation of the signals (or lack thereof)? WHERE CAN I FIND THE DOCUMENTATION ON THESE CURSED 'SIGNALS' I KEEP HEARING ABOUT? WHERE'S THE MAN PAGE? WHERE'S THE RFC? WHERE'S THE FAQ??? I'M TRYING TO RTFM!!!! It's enough to put a boy off entirely, and that isn't nearly the start of my pathetic dating career...
;) but it never really seemed particularly fulfilling when it was good, and when it was bad it was so sordid as to throw me off quite thoroughly.
Online? I used to do that in college (on vaxen oh so many years ago
Your Working Boy,
For people that are terminal introverts, meeting other people is a serious problem. You only feel comfortable opening up among people you know, but people can only get to know you if you open up... I'm sure many of you know the problem.
Somehow, online makes it a -lot- easier to just open up and talk, express yourself... that leads to flamewars, among other bad things, but it can also be a good thing.
I have a personal rule, which is that no matter how intimate we feel online, nothing is decided before we've met iRL. Online is a good way to meet people and to talk, but it's a very different thing from being in someone's rl presence.
It's also a good idea to have a 'safety'; the world does have nutty people out there. Make sure someone knows where you're going, who you're meeting, and expects you to contact back at a particular time. This advice probably applies more strongly to female geeks than males, but it wouldn't hurt men to be a little careful too. And, of course, meet for the first time in a public place, with other people around.
--Parity
--Parity
'Card carrying' member of the EFF.
Well, "online romances" as they are defined by the media - by having 'cyber sex' and doing all sorts of stupid typing shit doesn't work. But I found my husband online, met him in real life and I couldn't get enough of him.
:).
Coupla years later, our relationship is stronger than when we met and I'm seriously happy
What doesn't work however is getting online to get sexed w/o any relationship. Duh - suprise. People in bars have been trying to figure this one out for ages.
At any rate toodlez
I don't recommend trying to meet women on irc, but if you're really that shy, it isn't all that bad. I've actually met a few really cool women on irc, had a 1 year relationship with one of them. The two women I knew the best weren't "geeks" themselves but get along with the geek personality really well. I have met a number of women from irc who I very much *don't* like, but real life results in the same thing anyway. No big deal.
DO NOT become dependant on online socializing. Thats the way I was about 3 years ago, and even if you hang out with people from irc, it's still generally a depressing life. I still chat on irc a bit, but I don't TRY to meet women online anymore. If I happen upon someone who I really seem to get along with (important note: when you talk with someone online, you only "see" a small part of what they really are...you mind tends to make up the rest of what you think they are) I'll still meet them if possible.
Bottom line: DO NOT BECOME DEPENDANT ON ONLINE SOCIALIZATION!! It's just bad. I think most people here will agree.
Over the summer I began talking via aolim (mm.. gaim..) to a girl from my school who I hadn't know real well. By getting to know each toher better over the net, we eventually hooked up in real life . Conversing online allows you to say things that you may have trouble saying in real life, although important issues should still be discussed face to face in my opinion.
Okay, I am tired, I will keep this short.
Last Jan., I saw a website I really liked. The guy who designed it (as a showcase of his work) seemed really interesting and intelligent. I wrote to tell him I was impressed, and we struck up a conversation. It was a wonderful correspondance; finally I had a guy who wasn't inmtimidated by my knowledge of computers nor scared by my Star Wars obsession. Long story short- in June, he asked me to visit him, and flew me to NYC from Central Ontario. We got along well, and were very attracted to one another. A good time was had by all. We didn't try anything like a comitted long distance relationship, and now I'm hooking up with a Southern Ontario geek, who also happens to be a musician. I met him through his music.
My advice about meeting geek girls - be the best geek you can be. Sounds cheesy, but smart Really is the new sexy. I don't find receding hair lines a turn on, but they look pretty good if the brain they hover over is stimulating.
I'd much rather you crack MS than buy me chocolate or flowers. Though I'd be more impressed with something realy neat, not cracker nonsense.
And if you have a non-tech hobby, see if you can meet girls that way. I mean, we geek girls do get out ocasionally, too.
I've never had a serious relationship with anyone who I've met online. However, I've always had a serious online relationship with those I've met in real life. It can be essential to helping maintain a long distance relationship, too.
E-mail is always cheaper than a phone call, and a talk session (or any modern chat protocol-thing, ICQ, AIM, IRC, whatever) is more interactive, and sometimes more clear. (However, has anyone tried that internet phone stuff? I've been meaning to use Speak Freely with someone, but haven't done it yet...)
However you can manage to find people people that intrest you, please do, and remember that computer networks are excellent ways to keep in touch and coordinate events.
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pb Reply rather than vaguely moderate me.
pb Reply or e-mail; don't vaguely moderate.
I'm 19, male, and in college, and have yet to go out on a "date" at all. Why not? It's not due to any of the reasons you probably thought above (i.e. I'm not gay, etc), but because I simply have other things to do, and I suspect this is the case with a number of computer people. We're too busy trying to save the world from the evils of Microsoft, posting to slashdot at 11:35PM (CST) or doing other things that have nothing at all to do with computers, but don't seem to interest many females (laser tag and meeting at McDonald's after..well, nevermind the trouble I've gotten into).
So, how accurate am I?
--------------------
I've had soc 101 so I feel I'm an expert in this arena, and based on a few years of meeting chicks online, feel I must contribute. One thing I've found to be true of both sexes who are looking for a date online is that in most cases there's a good reason. I don't think it's unfair to call it a last resort, in spite of the undeniable benefits of getting to know someone before appearance comes into it. Granted that, I think most people turn to the net for love when the usual channels aren't working. This applies to myself as well, and it doesn't necessarily mean you have a hunchback.. Given that physical attraction is, for the vast majority of the population, a requirement for romance, it seems like a lot of effort just to find out the other person ain't that good looking. Of course, if like me you're just spending work time doing it, nothing lost. And there's always the longshot that pays off. One problem with it is that I think many geek guys are a bit intimidated by women, and the role men are supposed to play when picking one up. It's much easier to be interesting on irc at 20 or even 40 wpm than to try to think of stuff to say to a woman when you're face to face. That's a double-edged sword though, as it can make your RL self even less adept at making a good impression. I know if I email a girl for too long before talking on the phone it's a real transition to be charming at full speed, but maybe I'm just slow. I think the chances of finding someone you can get along with isn't all that great, but it's no worse than in the carbon community. for me it's all moot, because the only time I've ever fallen in love is when I wasn't looking.. My suggestion to all you lonely guys is to go out with your friends and have a good time, go to places where there are women, and you'll eventually find one. And take a chance and talk to that cutie in the black leather boots.. the worst that can happen is you'll crash and burn, (I know) but you'll get more comfortable approaching women.
"hard work often pays off over time, but laziness always pays off now."
I'd expect online romance to be as successful as online job searches. About 4% of people got jobs through the internet last year. I used to participate in online dating services as an undergrad. Nothing ever came of it and since then I figured there are better things to do than lead around a Mary Cleaver wannabe.
I met my current girlfriend through ICQ and it has been the healthiest relationship I've been in. However, I can't recommend putting too much expectation in finding love through internet. I started going to college 10 years ago and I've known many couples who met online. It seems about 1 out of 10 seemed to blossom into something with a future. There are many reasons why this happened:
:)
1. Introverts are attracted to Internet. A lot of relationship grew out of mutual loneliness. I'm not saying all introverts are lonely, but a lot of them are.
2. Lack of accountability. I've seen both sides. I don't think women are better than men in this. When you don't see the other person, it's easier to forget about them. It's hard enough to find people with honesty and integrity in real life nowadays, what do you think of your chance of finding one in a "Young swinging professionals" chat room?
3. Geographic barrier. Rarely you meet someone you like online who lives within an hour drive from your place. This leads to a long distance relationship, which is another can of worm by itself.
I was very skeptical about my own relationship because I was too aware of the problems that may come with it. I only have a couple of advises for those who're thinking of going into it:
Don't Force It
Just like any other relationships, let things grow naturally. It's also important to handle things more delicately than usual. Prepare for the chance that you may not be suitable for each other after all. Women are also too often getting emotional over doing something that's been sickeningly glorified by movies like You've Got Mail.
Maintain your cool
Most geeks I know (including myself) are fiercely loyal to their partners. Sometimes we misplace our trust and get blinded by red flags. Always be tough on yourself and ask those hard questions. Sure, you could end up overanalyzing it, but I've never seen one that failed because of it. Most failures are caused by "playing by heart" too much and not enough "listening to reason".
Online and long-distance relationship is not for everyone. Even if you think you can handle it, make sure your partner can too. I've mentioned honesty and integrity before. Other helpful qualities are maturity and good communication skills.
As I said before, I can't recommend this for everybody. My girlfriend and I are very aware of what's going on around us. We saw other couples crashed and burned and we tried to learn from their mistakes. We talked to couples who have gone through the same process and made it, and we tried to draw inspirations from them. Sure, it sounds like a disney movie, but it works for us. It never crossed our mind that we could skip all those troubles by asking slashdot about it.
wan
I can certainly attest to that (not the marrying part)! However, I am not an HNG myself, though I do happen to inhabit the UF list. I wonder how long until they give me a title.. (probably something incorporating the word ``Loser'' if Signal 11 gets his wish)
It is a nice, relaxed atmosphere, however. ;)
~ Kish
Hey, admin-types? Want to generate some action on this site? Want a few more people looking at all those nifty Web ads?
The above idea.. is fabulous! Can you /possibly/ think of a better way to attract more network life of the geek variety?
(I, for one, am all for it)
~ Kish
Vicki and I met on a Usenet newsgroup, rather than interactive chat. Maybe it's because we're older than most geeks, but communication where you actually put some thought into every sentence you write worked better for us. We started exchanging email, we met face to face about 2 months later. 6 months after that, I got a job in her city so we could start dating like real people. About two years after that we got married. I'm sure you horny young geeks think that's an incredibly long time to wait, but we'd both been married before and we both had kids, so we had to be sure this was right.
Anyway, check out our wedding web page
The next Cmdr Taco duplicate will be ready soon, but subscribers can beat the rush and see it early!
..and I know.. I work the graveyard shift, myself. 10 pm to 6 am, and I'm always too wired to sleep when I first get home, so guess when I sleep? Right before work. Guess when that is? The time the rest of humanity is awake! (at least in my time zone)
As a previous poster suggested, however, looking for dates at work might not be so bad, especially in this case, because at least you'll be on the same fscked phase. ;)
Speaking of which, I should force myself to sleep now..
~ Kish
I divied this long post into various sections with bolded text.. Take advantage of this fact if you don't want to read my boring history!
..you know, just because I'm bored and such. I myself haven't had much luck with meeting women online. And at least when you meet them in person they live close, so it is fun while it lasts (that is, before you get screwed over.. this is assuming it doesn't last, of course).
The Abbreviated History:
However, the number of potential SOs I've met online pale considerably to those I've met IRL. I myself tend to get involved one of three ways: 1) someone takes an interest in me and adamantly pursues me (sometimes I'm not too crazy about the person, but most women who are -- I hate to say ``odd enough'', lest I curtail further efforts.. I don't think them odd, I just think the situation odd, because it's.. not a usual occurance -- to pursue me, but usually I'm receptive) 2) I meet them through mutual friends and get to know them fairly well before we just sort of become an item 3) I meet them online in some fashion or another. I've never been like the women described in example 1.. I just don't wander up and randomly hit on someone I think is cute at school, work, wherever (this is changing soon, I think). Well, maybe I have, but more in the fashion as described in example 2. I make friends with them, and things naturally progress..
A number of women I've met online were just total washouts. I've had a few that the first time I talked to them on the phone, I knew that it was a lost cause (due to lack of interest on my part). I've only met two such individuals IRL. One was in Canada. This actually turned out fairly well for a while. Personality conflicts eventually killed this one, and we are not on speaking terms anymore (I wager a psychosis of some kind on her end, but we won't get into that today). With the other, it was more of a casual flirtatious thing (as in example 1, except I was somewhat ``desperate'' at the time, and make any excuse to travel, even if only to meet friends, not potential SOs). This flared (very, very dimly) for only a short time before mutual disinterest in the notion set in. I still visited. Was an alright visit (I'm oversimplifying, for brevity's sake, on most of all of the above). However, again, not on speaking terms at this point (longer story which ties into the previous paragraph in obscure and frightening ways).
Now we come to the second female I've met online that seemed worth my time in a very real and productive way (which includes this paragraph, and the paragraph before the one previous.. that is, the previous paragraph doesn't count in this tally). However, this seems to have panned out badly. (that is, current status unknown, though outlook appears dim) Again, this is due to personality conflict.
General Thoughts:
All in all, even the best prospect can turn sour. My most recent interest seems to have panned out despite being virtually perfect with regards to interests, personality, intelligence, even physical attractiveness (though this is emphatically not a major factor).. due to little things. Some personality quirks simply do not appeal to others. For me, one is presumptuous. I choose my words carefully, and when people divine implied meanings that simply aren't there and act upon them without consulting me in a reasonable fashion.. I'm going to tell them to fuck off.
To ``Summarize'' My Thoughts:
My closing thoughts: It doesn't matter where you meet your SO. Always keep your options and eyes open, lest you miss out on an oppurtunity. Actively hunting for a date just for the sake of dating isn't likely to net you a real find (unless you're simply not interested in the long term). Being honest and direct is a Good Thing. Most females I've met who had romantic potential lied to me or decieved me in some way. They were dispensed with with exceptional expedience.
Honesty and trust forms the foundation for all healthy, stable, worthwhile relationships. If you have to lie to someone for them to be with you, if you're not worth trusting.. there is nothing there but a lie if you're together. It's meaningless. True love is the only real fulfilment, and it can not be won through deception.
You should also never lower your standards. Some compromise is good, because you'll never meet ``the perfect man/woman'', though you may meet the perfect one for you. If your personalities clash, don't force it. If you were meant to be together, some conflict will arise, as with all relationships, but it shouldn't be too much of a headache, or else you might want to wonder why you're together if you argue more than anything else. If you lower your standards, however, you're going to end up with someone you don't really want, simply because you're lonely. Obviously, this is not going to work out. Don't waste your time.
~ Kish
Computing has been pretty good for my real life. My first two serious romantic relationships started on M-Net, as did a long-standing friendship which was the critical contact allowing me eventually to leave a dead-end job in Michigan for what turned out to be a fairly rewarding career in Massachusetts. After that move, I met the woman who is now my wife, via alt.personals, and we exchanged email for several months before we met IRL. During a hiatus from that relationship before we got married (don't ask) I had another brief relationship, started this time on LambdaMOO.
Those are my credentials as a veteran of on-line romance. Now, the point I want to make is that the net is just a medium. To me, these relationships I've had aren't "net relationships" any more than using a phone to communicate makes them "phone relationships". They're relationships with people and the medium doesn't really matter.
There are many people who seem to develop an online persona that's different from their RL one. I'm not just talking about the sort of contextualization that causes us to interact differently with our children in the back yard and our boss at a cocktail party; I'm talking about something that's almost clinically recognizable as multiple personalities. These people often fear "crossover" between their real and virtual lives, and resist bringing the two together, because of what people may discover about their own "other self". Does this sound like a formula for long-term success and stability, romantic or otherwise? Obviously not. Most people who are online long enough eventually outgrow this phase and learn that the proper emphasis in "being yourself online" is on "being yourself" rather than "yourself online". People who maintain the separation too much or too long need to figure out what's so wrong with their real lives that they rely on their virtual lives as a refuge. Only then, IMO, can they expect to get anything substantial out of their interactions online.
Slashdot - News for Herds. Stuff that Splatters.
UserFriendly, of course, is already doing this, although coverage is a bit thin, at least in my area.
I'm starting a new personals site that seems to have attracted some interesting people (albiet mostly in the UK). My main interest was in making a more creatively-oriented, entertaining personals site. The profile system is very individualistic; it makes the answers fun to read.
Visit it at http://207.151.18.18/ - and note that it's completely free to use - no strings, no catch, you can reply to anyone you want as soon as you set up an account.
My for-pay competition is at http://www.match.com (probably the best one), http://www.americansingles.com/ and http://www.adultfriendfinder.com . Incidentally, I think the latter is a scam for the most part.
http://www.relationships.com appears to be free, and it has some interesting profile ideas. However, like the other services, it strikes a "too corporate" note in my mind.
I hope you'll try mine (and the others, if it pleases you) and let me know what you think. Bear in mind that it's about a week old, so there won't be too many geographically desirable matches just yet. Give it a little time and you might be surprised.
D
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That's not the main thing of course. What makes online dating so real is that many restrictions fall away. It's much easier to overcome the embarrasment of asking a personal question, and you can formulate it much better because you have the time to think about it. This makes for an environment where you open yourself up much faster. Generally, it's much more honest as well. It's easier to describe intimate personal details when you don't have too look in the other person's eyes.
The effect is that what's connecting online is two people at a deeper level than all social interface crap. We're talking inter-process communication, just short of having shared memory, rather than 2 GUIs trying to interact by reading eachother with cameras and doing real-time vector-processing. (Consider that geeks are generally bad at that real-time stuff).
Additionally, if you're so physically attracted to eachother like my SO and I are, you at least have the opportunity to control your libido ;-) Or, of course, let it run wild, no matter how far away you are. (She and I are on different continents ATM).
I can't say that I've ever really met/found any interest in women who were as obsessed with their computer (and, hence, programming, etc.) as I am, but I'll throw this out there, anyway. ;)
Two things to avoid: dating someone who is precisely like you and dating someone who is nothing like you. This seems obvious, but it merits being said once or twice (or more). You need to have enough common ground to relate, and enough differences to make it interesting.
For me, finding a creative/writer type with a sense of humor that matches mine (along with being honest, direct, trustworthy, and otherwise possessed of a sweet, loving/lovable personality, but let's be brief for once) is much more important to me than finding someone who also sits in front of the computer hacking away merrily on her favorite software project.
This is not to say that a relationship wouldn't work out between two people utterly obsessed with their computers (I myself would not turn down an oppurtunity based solely on such a false misconception), but it pays to focus your attention on other aspects. What's the worse that could happen? Your SO actually drags you away from your monitor every once in a while? I, for one, rarely object (read: never).
However, dating someone who is totally computer illiterate.. maybe not the best idea in the world..
~ Kish
1. The angry overreaction. "What the hell's wrong with you? I can do it myself!" In this case, you know not to ask her again, and you also know that she might not be (IMHO) the world's greatest relationship material. Not because she is independent or a feminist (I am both) -- because she overreacts to little things. If you LIKE walking on eggshells it could still work, but I'd look elsewhere.
2. "No, it's OK, I've got it," accompanied by a friendly smile. This one's definitely independent and feminist as well, but she's calm about it. However, depending on circumstance, this could be a fairly clear indication that (if this is what you had in mind) she's not interested romantically.
3. (My usual flirting tactic back when I was single, and still used on my boyfriend from time to time.) She lets you do whatever for her, and then she makes a big, showy display of doing something similar for you. If she's anything like me, this is a fairly clear sign of interest as well as an attempt to weed out those guys who are extremely insecure about their masculinity. If you like her and value her company, you will accept this with good cheer and even look forward to it.
4. She giggles and lets you do whatever for her. Can be good, can be bad. She might be impressed by your chivalry, or she might be deliberately feigning helplessness because she's a) a Rules Girl or b) otherwise trying to put on a fake charming personality. If she's genuine and you like that sort of thing, this could work. But RUN, don't walk, from those who feign helplessness and/or incompetence -- it's even more irritating than legitimate, actual stupidity. These are the same girls who will only eat half of an expensive dinner that you bought because they're worrying about how fat they are since they have to *gasp* wear a size eight! (Yeah, I'm a bit bitter. A good male friend of mine just got dumped by one of these after several years, and he had no idea it was coming. Ugh.)
"Somebody exploded a letter-bomb today
I've met a few guys from the net (as well as a lovely lady) and none of them have ever been disappointed by my appearance. I consider this a good thing. Of course, I'm not looking NOW *grin*, but I do think that you could do worse than finding someone on the internet. However, your best bet is probably to start talking to someone in something other than a "flirting" or "cybersex" area.
I did a lot of the net-romance thing in college. Two were complete psychos (why I stayed with one of 'em for five months, I'll never know), one just didn't work out and we don't really talk anymore, two that I was fairly serious about and starting to consider moving fell apart due to lack of transportation, but I'm still friends with them, and one I never met (due to his being on another continent) and we were never really a couple for that reason, but the interest was there and we are still friends
My boyfriend had a more difficult time meeting people online -- then again, he was living with parents (unlike me), and it's probably more difficult for guys due to the whole supply and demand thing. We did NOT meet online, and we're in the same town, but sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we'd run into each other online a few years ago.
"Somebody exploded a letter-bomb today