Remember, Hemos lives in Michigan, and probably drives an American car. So don't tell him that there are cars that can go faster than 45M/H -- you'll just make him cry.
The media isn't talking about it, but a new danger is at hand. A spooky danger. Halloween is just around the corner, and, upon the last day of October, the possiblity arises -- no pun intended -- that thousands of skeletons, ghosts, and zombies will emerge from the rubble of the World Grave Center and terrorize New York City. Of the $20 billion recently appropriated by Congress for disaster recovery, how much money is being invested in the rapid development and deployment of ghostbusting technology? Do we really want the families of WGC victims being subjected to the sight of their deceased loved ones shambling across downtown Manhattan, eating the brains of the innocent in celebration of their unholy holiday?
Not only that, but the vast quantities of fresh blood being sent to New York may trigger a vampire epidemic. I tell you, October in New York will be spooktacular indeed.
Re:He still uses only his legs ...
on
Biking @ 80 MPH
·
· Score: -1
Maybe they can create a vehicle that works via the power of my erection. It could blow me, and then drive me to work.
Um... not much skill required to endo at 80M/H. It would still be X-treme, though. It would own. It would be even better if the dude was doing the Dew. Then he could jump on to one of those lamer scooters that all the kids with no coordination use. Wow, maybe he could install Linux on the scooter. Imagine a Beowulf cluster of Linux scooters. Wow.
Re:not the quickiest muscle powered human
on
Biking @ 80 MPH
·
· Score: -1
If you're going to include gravity-assistance, then I'll bet that the World Grave Center Professional High-jumpers have the cyclists and the skiers beat!
Trinidad? Sounds like one of those third-world terrorist countries to me, like Canada.
Oh, wait, that's where you're from? It seems like you've got the murder of American civilians in your blood, as well as cycling -- that's what it's called, by the way, you filthy terrorist. "Bikers" are fat men on Harleys. "Cyclists" are skinny men on Campagnolo. (Or in your case, more like Shimano, the cheap terrorist alternative to Campy.)
Anyway, I certainly hope that you can restrict your violent ethnic tendencies to moose-fucking.
When I first read the headline, I expected the story to be about privatizing NASA. That's about the worst thing that could happen to NASA, though, because the kind of gross incompetence occurs in every level of every part of the US government is not tolerated in the private sector. Personally, I think that all government agencies should be privatized, and opened to the free market. The joke that is NASA -- remember, kids, it's spelled N-A-S-A, but it's pronounced, "those fucking imbeciles" -- would never be awarded a contract in the first place, in such a system.
Or maybe we could elect the heads of these bloated monster organizations. Perhaps if the heads of NASA, IRS, FDA, et cetera were forced to run for a public office, we'd see some sort of reform.
DON'T CLICK THAT LINK UNLESS YOU WANT TO SEE SOME ASS!
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I can't believe that Slashdot posted a 1.5-year-old April Fool's joke as legitimate news. If this doesn't prove what fucking moronic dipshit losers the "editors" are, nothing does. Give admin access to the trolls; they actually know how to close italics tags and use spellcheck. Fucktards.
How Hemos Got His Groove Back
How Hemos Got His Groove Back,
A Short Story by The_Messenger
===///===
"Nik, I'm not comfortable with your hand being on my ass."
"But come on, baby, you know you want it," Nik insisted. How had I, Jeff "Hemos" Bates, gotten myself into such a predicament? Sure, I'd always thought Nik was cute, and even though I never formally came out, Nik always seemed to know the wife was a front all along. And when "Gay" Nik, famous in the Open Source Community for his insatiable desire for rough gay sex, invited me to help him set up his new FreeBSD box, I had an idea something was up. Little did I know that "something" was Nik's ten inches of rock-hard manmeat, pulsing through his faded Levi's jeans like a wild jungle snake.
"Nik, you're hurting me!", I whelped.
"And that's just the way you like it, bitch," Nik snarled. "You know that famous cartoon of the daemon giving it to the penguin in the behind? Thats gonna be you and me, mate," Nate said with a flick of his golden blond highlighted locks. His English accent was so charming... it almost made such awful things sound nice. But no, I mustn't go down that road... "But first," Nik continued, "we must set up this FreeBSD box. FreeBSD is the only true homosexual operating system, and so you will learn it, because I tell you to. I won't have any dirty Linux user sucking my balls."
"Oh, Nik," I whispered, batting my eyelashes, "must you always be so forceful?" Nik slapped my ass and laughed.
"Calm down, you pansy. You don't know the meaning of forceful yet. Now grab that 4.2 CD." I leaned over and grabbed the CD set for FreeBSD 4.2. Nik got his media free from Walnut Creek, because the admins there were terrified of him. Rumour has it that one Walnut Creek operator who refused to send Nik the latest FreeBSD CD kit for free was found in the machine room the next morning duct-taped to a chair with an RJ45 crimper jammed into his bloody asshole. Ever since, Nik has been sent prerelease copies of every FreeBSD set.
All of my administration experience is with Red Hat, so I was a little scared to try a real operating system, but with Nik's expert guidance, I was well on my way to learning this queer OS. Nik showed me how to use the curses-based installation tool to partition my disks, select an installation profile, and set up XFree86. Within an hour, the system was installed, and rebooted back to a command prompt.
I was standing in front of the console when Nik came up behind me.
"How's it going, mate?" he asked.
"Oh, Nik," I said, startled, "you startled me. I'm just trying to mount this CD-ROM's filesystem. The commands are similar, but this Berkely csh takes a little getting used to."
"Let me help, love," he murmured. He stepped closer behind me, and I could feel his hot breath on the back of my neck. I moved my hands away from the keyboard to allow him access, and he mounted the drive with blinding speed. "There, all better. Anything else you need mounted, love?"
"Oh, Nik..." I said quietly, my breath rushing out. Nik stepped closer, and I could feel his hot tool pressing into the depression of my asscrack through his jeans. "Oh, Nik, yes, there is something you could mount." I couldn't take it any longer. This strapping Englishman's dominant sexuality had overcome my fears of public embarrassment, and there I vowed to myself that from that day forward I would be Nik's woman. I threw my arms behind me, grabbed his ass, and pulled him closer. "Show me your hard drive, you naughty little daemon."
"Much obliged," Nik said with a wink. "But I'm anything but little." Nik slowly pulled off his tight jeans and out sprang the biggest, thickest cock I had ever seen. Now I watch a lot of gay pornography, but never in the depths of my deepest homosexual desire had I craved a dick this magnificent. It was like a juicy flank steak, dripping with juices. The aroma of ballcheese wafted up toward me as his mammoth testicles swung like pendulums of eroticism. I lost control and feel to my knees instantly, slobbering greedily at the wonderous thing, struggling, in vain, to fit the monstrous cockhead into my mouth.
"Oh, Nik," I cried, "I want you, I need you, I must have you. Make me your woman."
"And so I will mate, but first I must prepare you. Take off your clothes," Nik commanded. I clumsily undressed, unable to take my eyes off of his prodigious member. Nik reached over to his backpack (the one with the rainbow patches) and took out five jars of Astroglide lubricant. When I was finally naked, Nik looked up.
"Oh, well look at that," Nik said, pointing to my tiny, erect penis. "How cute. It's almost as small as Jon Katz's."
"Now, Nik, don't make fun," I said, sternly.
"I'm just kidding, love. To be honest, I like the 'little boy' look. I see you've shaved your pubes. Nice."
"Oh, Nik, I never had pubes..."
"Even better. You bald testicles remind me of my youth, when I was gang-raped by my daddy and four uncles."
"You were molested too?" I asked, hopeful.
"Of course, mate. All us faggots were. Now turn around and kneel in front of the couch." I did, and Nik proceeded to slather my virgin rosebud with three jars of Astroglide. As he did, he worked his fingers in and out of my asshole. My tiny penis was completely erect, almost touching my navel. Nik reached down and stroked it with two fingers (all that was necessary) was he prepared my anus. I moaned and sighed, and called out Rob Malda's name several times in my ecstacy. But Nik stopped before I could waste my seed, and stood back.
" Hemos, I think you've inspected my hard disk for long enough. Now I'm going to give your box more RAM."
"Oh, yes, Nik, RAM my box! R007 m3! 0wn me!"
"Hemos, it gets me so hot when you speak l337. Keep doing so." I let loose a string of l337 speak which would make even the most k-r4d w4R3z d00d blush, and Nik's penis began the descent towards my throbbing asshole.
"Oh!" I screamed, as Nik's gigantor began to rend my asshole to proportions only G. Oatse had known before. "Oh, Nik, pump my virgin geek asshole! Use and abuse me like Jon Katz did the Slashdot community! Pingflood my rectum like I'm running Red Hat 7! For the love of Barbara Streisand, Slashdot my ass!!"
The pumping and thrusting started, and didn't stop for 78 hours. Nik took me on a wild, shit-caked tour of Heaven, Hell, and San Francisco. I was on the edge of consciousness when he reached climax. He spewed gallons upon gallons of creamy sputum into my rectal cavity, filling my body up with his love. My abdomen swelled up like a water balloon, and I could taste his cum in the back of my throat when the tide finally ceased. I fell to the floor, and Nik stood up.
"Now you are mine, and a l337 FreeBSD user. I dub three Lord Hemos, proud and gay, and you shall sit at my right hand in Wales, where I rule the Court of FreeBSD Committers with an iron fist and a steel cock. Stand up, Lord Hemos, and let me eat your dirty ass."
Nik helped me up, and I weakly stood, amazed, as Nik proceeded to eat my asshole clean. Nik was on his knees behind me, lowered to the same level as the lowest California gigalo. Much like Jesus would wash the feet as his followers, Nik inducted his lovers into his secret cabal of Gay FreeBSD Love by dining on their sore, runny assholes. He ingested his own jizzm, completing the Circle of Gay.
When my rump had healed, I left Michigan (and my wife) on a journey with Nik to the UK, a Gay Wonderland rumoured to be the birthplace of homosexuality. I learned the gay alphabet, gay spelling ("It's 'coluououour', stupid American! Tee hee!"), and to use the gay currency (uro), and had a BSD Daemon tattooed on my ass with the phrase "Property of Gay Nik".
This has all happened so fast! It's hard to believe that only six hours ago, I was Jeff Bates, closeted homosexual and Linux user. I'm so glad that Nik and I got together, and I credit everything to FreeBSD, the l337est and Gayest UNIX-clone in the Universe! I invite you to check out your local FreeBSD user group and check us out!
These days, I'm very busy with FreeBSD and being Nik's trophy wife, but I've also created HEMOS, the Homoerotic Male Outreach service, an organization dedicated to saving poor young men from the perils of heterosexuality and Linux-userhood. We've already saved Cowboy Neal (how could a guy with a name like that not be queer?) and Emmett will be coming along soon. Please join us!
Love,
Lord Hemos the Gay
THE END.
Send comments to the_messsenger@evilemail.com. Thanks.
Perhaps he wants to turn it into a recording studio or use the outlying buildings as concert halls. And I'm sure that the interior structures have some unique acoustics.
(I'm being serious. There are a lot of people with a lot of money, and there's no law against them using eBay. Or perhaps he is acting as an agent of his employer.)
Doesn't matter. You can tell that the missile will land either in the US, or close enough that it couldn't have been intended for anywhere else. And even if you could predict its trajectory precisely, it's not like there's time to warn the people who are about to be barbecued. You only know what you need to know: that your country has been attacked.
Because Illiad is a faggot. His comic is poorly-drawn and highly unfunny. His fans are loser "geek groupies" whose knowledge of technical things falls just short of "unscrewing the chassis of a PC." Fucktards, the artist and his followers.
His sponser is SuSE, the famed NAZI Linux distribution.
Here is a complimentary Truthelfish translation of this "news" item.
Ask Slashdot: Free advertising? Posted by Moron on Friday October 05, @06:32PM
from the bet-you've-been-waiting-for-these dept.
Lamer asks: I have recently developed an exciting
new product. I would like to either sell the product directly, or sell its design to MicroOptical Corporation for many dollars. However,
publicity is expensive, and unfortunately, I have little funds left after spending my monthly
paycheck on child pornography. Would you be so kind as to direct several hundred thousand of
your hacker-wannabe, 15 year-old readers toward my site? Even if the hits don't help me,
perhaps I can persuade a few readers into an underage-sex orgy. It's unnecessary to
mention that if we "editors" had the brains of a hampster, we wouldn't fall for this crap,
but you can't blame us -- we run Linux, after all.;-)
Thank you for your time. For more information about Truthelfish, come on out of the
closet. Hemos, we're talking to you.
This is America. My countrymen are morons. They don't think there's a terrorism risk until the World Grave Center incident, and all of a sudden there's a rush to solve the new "epidemic" problem. Same thing that happened with the Columbine BS -- those kids could have done the same thing thirty years earlier. Post-80s America is a reactionary joke.
The fact is that you are just as likely to be a victim of a terrorist attack today as you were 50 years ago. People have publically stated their intentions of detroying the US for even longer than that.
Offtopic, indeed:-) but your post demonstrates this psychological flaw. You bought the laptop a year ago, and have been at risk every day since. Don't think that it's a new problem when it finally blows up!
If they were done right, they would still be in use. UNIX came about in part because of the deficienies of Multics. We should instead look at OSs which have stood the test of time, OSs which have existed for more than two decades.
UNIX, S/390, and MacOS come to mind -- they have changed greatly in form, but the original intentions of the designs are still intact. Microsoft, on the other hand, decides to change their OS goals every five years. (Microsoft also has a history of good, iterative technologies; DDE led to OLE led to COM led to DCOM/COM+/DNA are the foundations of.NET. But even the goals of NT have changed in the last five years.)
Yes, IBM has a JDK for PPC. I'm running the AIX4.3 version now, and it sucks ass -- why the fuck can't they put the fucking executables in $JAVA_HOME/bin, like every other JDK on the planet? Instead, you have to use the wrappers in $JAVA_HOME/sh. Morons.
IBM's JVM is also notoriously unreliable. Ask the iPlanet goons why it took them 200 years to port Enterprise Web Server 4.1 to AIX.
Two things are interesting to note. First, while the StarCat supports four times as many CPUs as this box, IBM has made a name for itself in recent years by kicking Sun's ass with fewer processors. (My favorite instance of this being the a.root server switch to RS/6000 a couple years ago. IBM became the "dot in dot-com" several months after Sun's marketing campaign started.:-) Second, notice how the max memory to CPU ratio is higher than with Sun servers. The E10k supports 64 CPUs (twice as many as the p690) but only 64GB RAM, IIRC (a quarter as much as the p690). The StarCat supports four times as many CPUs as the p690, but only ~twice as much memory. Clearly, this simple observation underlies the differing hardware engineering strategies involved.
Regardless, I am pleased to see the availability hardware that will run Oracle 9i without thrashing.:-)
Slashdot Mirror
Remember, Hemos lives in Michigan, and probably drives an American car. So don't tell him that there are cars that can go faster than 45M/H -- you'll just make him cry.
(Abwahahaha haha haha! A ha ha ha... Ha...)
(Snicker)
Ha! Yeah, the EuroCPU. And it'd be just as much as failure as the Eurofighter.
Not only that, but the vast quantities of fresh blood being sent to New York may trigger a vampire epidemic. I tell you, October in New York will be spooktacular indeed.
Oops, wait, I forgot. Sorry, Sarcasta.
In case you didn't read the entire article, the guy with no windows didn't win. He just looked stupid. Yes, the lame pun still applies.
Um... not much skill required to endo at 80M/H. It would still be X-treme, though. It would own. It would be even better if the dude was doing the Dew. Then he could jump on to one of those lamer scooters that all the kids with no coordination use. Wow, maybe he could install Linux on the scooter. Imagine a Beowulf cluster of Linux scooters. Wow.
If you're going to include gravity-assistance, then I'll bet that the World Grave Center Professional High-jumpers have the cyclists and the skiers beat!
Corollary to Third Law... I like it. :-)
Oh, wait, that's where you're from? It seems like you've got the murder of American civilians in your blood, as well as cycling -- that's what it's called, by the way, you filthy terrorist. "Bikers" are fat men on Harleys. "Cyclists" are skinny men on Campagnolo. (Or in your case, more like Shimano, the cheap terrorist alternative to Campy.)
Anyway, I certainly hope that you can restrict your violent ethnic tendencies to moose-fucking.
Or maybe we could elect the heads of these bloated monster organizations. Perhaps if the heads of NASA, IRS, FDA, et cetera were forced to run for a public office, we'd see some sort of reform.
Or perhaps Slashdot is a fucking shithole.
DON'T CLICK THAT LINK UNLESS YOU WANT TO SEE SOME ASS!
Important Stuff:
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Try to reply to other people comments instead of starting new threads.
Read other people's messages before posting your own to avoid simply duplicating what has already been said.
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I can't believe that Slashdot posted a 1.5-year-old April Fool's joke as legitimate news. If this doesn't prove what fucking moronic dipshit losers the "editors" are, nothing does. Give admin access to the trolls; they actually know how to close italics tags and use spellcheck. Fucktards.
A Short Story by The_Messenger
===///===
"Nik, I'm not comfortable with your hand being on my ass."
"But come on, baby, you know you want it," Nik insisted. How had I, Jeff "Hemos" Bates, gotten myself into such a predicament? Sure, I'd always thought Nik was cute, and even though I never formally came out, Nik always seemed to know the wife was a front all along. And when "Gay" Nik, famous in the Open Source Community for his insatiable desire for rough gay sex, invited me to help him set up his new FreeBSD box, I had an idea something was up. Little did I know that "something" was Nik's ten inches of rock-hard manmeat, pulsing through his faded Levi's jeans like a wild jungle snake.
"Nik, you're hurting me!", I whelped.
"And that's just the way you like it, bitch," Nik snarled. "You know that famous cartoon of the daemon giving it to the penguin in the behind? Thats gonna be you and me, mate," Nate said with a flick of his golden blond highlighted locks. His English accent was so charming... it almost made such awful things sound nice. But no, I mustn't go down that road... "But first," Nik continued, "we must set up this FreeBSD box. FreeBSD is the only true homosexual operating system, and so you will learn it, because I tell you to. I won't have any dirty Linux user sucking my balls."
"Oh, Nik," I whispered, batting my eyelashes, "must you always be so forceful?" Nik slapped my ass and laughed.
"Calm down, you pansy. You don't know the meaning of forceful yet. Now grab that 4.2 CD." I leaned over and grabbed the CD set for FreeBSD 4.2. Nik got his media free from Walnut Creek, because the admins there were terrified of him. Rumour has it that one Walnut Creek operator who refused to send Nik the latest FreeBSD CD kit for free was found in the machine room the next morning duct-taped to a chair with an RJ45 crimper jammed into his bloody asshole. Ever since, Nik has been sent prerelease copies of every FreeBSD set.
All of my administration experience is with Red Hat, so I was a little scared to try a real operating system, but with Nik's expert guidance, I was well on my way to learning this queer OS. Nik showed me how to use the curses-based installation tool to partition my disks, select an installation profile, and set up XFree86. Within an hour, the system was installed, and rebooted back to a command prompt.
I was standing in front of the console when Nik came up behind me.
"How's it going, mate?" he asked.
"Oh, Nik," I said, startled, "you startled me. I'm just trying to mount this CD-ROM's filesystem. The commands are similar, but this Berkely csh takes a little getting used to."
"Let me help, love," he murmured. He stepped closer behind me, and I could feel his hot breath on the back of my neck. I moved my hands away from the keyboard to allow him access, and he mounted the drive with blinding speed. "There, all better. Anything else you need mounted, love?"
"Oh, Nik..." I said quietly, my breath rushing out. Nik stepped closer, and I could feel his hot tool pressing into the depression of my asscrack through his jeans. "Oh, Nik, yes, there is something you could mount." I couldn't take it any longer. This strapping Englishman's dominant sexuality had overcome my fears of public embarrassment, and there I vowed to myself that from that day forward I would be Nik's woman. I threw my arms behind me, grabbed his ass, and pulled him closer. "Show me your hard drive, you naughty little daemon."
"Much obliged," Nik said with a wink. "But I'm anything but little." Nik slowly pulled off his tight jeans and out sprang the biggest, thickest cock I had ever seen. Now I watch a lot of gay pornography, but never in the depths of my deepest homosexual desire had I craved a dick this magnificent. It was like a juicy flank steak, dripping with juices. The aroma of ballcheese wafted up toward me as his mammoth testicles swung like pendulums of eroticism. I lost control and feel to my knees instantly, slobbering greedily at the wonderous thing, struggling, in vain, to fit the monstrous cockhead into my mouth.
"Oh, Nik," I cried, "I want you, I need you, I must have you. Make me your woman."
"And so I will mate, but first I must prepare you. Take off your clothes," Nik commanded. I clumsily undressed, unable to take my eyes off of his prodigious member. Nik reached over to his backpack (the one with the rainbow patches) and took out five jars of Astroglide lubricant. When I was finally naked, Nik looked up.
"Oh, well look at that," Nik said, pointing to my tiny, erect penis. "How cute. It's almost as small as Jon Katz's."
"Now, Nik, don't make fun," I said, sternly.
"I'm just kidding, love. To be honest, I like the 'little boy' look. I see you've shaved your pubes. Nice."
"Oh, Nik, I never had pubes..."
"Even better. You bald testicles remind me of my youth, when I was gang-raped by my daddy and four uncles."
"You were molested too?" I asked, hopeful.
"Of course, mate. All us faggots were. Now turn around and kneel in front of the couch." I did, and Nik proceeded to slather my virgin rosebud with three jars of Astroglide. As he did, he worked his fingers in and out of my asshole. My tiny penis was completely erect, almost touching my navel. Nik reached down and stroked it with two fingers (all that was necessary) was he prepared my anus. I moaned and sighed, and called out Rob Malda's name several times in my ecstacy. But Nik stopped before I could waste my seed, and stood back.
" Hemos, I think you've inspected my hard disk for long enough. Now I'm going to give your box more RAM."
"Oh, yes, Nik, RAM my box! R007 m3! 0wn me!"
"Hemos, it gets me so hot when you speak l337. Keep doing so." I let loose a string of l337 speak which would make even the most k-r4d w4R3z d00d blush, and Nik's penis began the descent towards my throbbing asshole.
"Oh!" I screamed, as Nik's gigantor began to rend my asshole to proportions only G. Oatse had known before. "Oh, Nik, pump my virgin geek asshole! Use and abuse me like Jon Katz did the Slashdot community! Pingflood my rectum like I'm running Red Hat 7! For the love of Barbara Streisand, Slashdot my ass!!"
The pumping and thrusting started, and didn't stop for 78 hours. Nik took me on a wild, shit-caked tour of Heaven, Hell, and San Francisco. I was on the edge of consciousness when he reached climax. He spewed gallons upon gallons of creamy sputum into my rectal cavity, filling my body up with his love. My abdomen swelled up like a water balloon, and I could taste his cum in the back of my throat when the tide finally ceased. I fell to the floor, and Nik stood up.
"Now you are mine, and a l337 FreeBSD user. I dub three Lord Hemos, proud and gay, and you shall sit at my right hand in Wales, where I rule the Court of FreeBSD Committers with an iron fist and a steel cock. Stand up, Lord Hemos, and let me eat your dirty ass."
Nik helped me up, and I weakly stood, amazed, as Nik proceeded to eat my asshole clean. Nik was on his knees behind me, lowered to the same level as the lowest California gigalo. Much like Jesus would wash the feet as his followers, Nik inducted his lovers into his secret cabal of Gay FreeBSD Love by dining on their sore, runny assholes. He ingested his own jizzm, completing the Circle of Gay.
When my rump had healed, I left Michigan (and my wife) on a journey with Nik to the UK, a Gay Wonderland rumoured to be the birthplace of homosexuality. I learned the gay alphabet, gay spelling ("It's 'coluououour', stupid American! Tee hee!"), and to use the gay currency (uro), and had a BSD Daemon tattooed on my ass with the phrase "Property of Gay Nik".
This has all happened so fast! It's hard to believe that only six hours ago, I was Jeff Bates, closeted homosexual and Linux user. I'm so glad that Nik and I got together, and I credit everything to FreeBSD, the l337est and Gayest UNIX-clone in the Universe! I invite you to check out your local FreeBSD user group and check us out!
These days, I'm very busy with FreeBSD and being Nik's trophy wife, but I've also created HEMOS, the Homoerotic Male Outreach service, an organization dedicated to saving poor young men from the perils of heterosexuality and Linux-userhood. We've already saved Cowboy Neal (how could a guy with a name like that not be queer?) and Emmett will be coming along soon. Please join us!
Love,
Lord Hemos the Gay
THE END.
Send comments to the_messsenger@evilemail.com. Thanks.
Probably at least three or four ounces, before your stoned self wanders off of a precipice, never to be see again.
(Bend over, and try to relax. Remember, blood is a natural lubricant!)
(I'm being serious. There are a lot of people with a lot of money, and there's no law against them using eBay. Or perhaps he is acting as an agent of his employer.)
Doesn't matter. You can tell that the missile will land either in the US, or close enough that it couldn't have been intended for anywhere else. And even if you could predict its trajectory precisely, it's not like there's time to warn the people who are about to be barbecued. You only know what you need to know: that your country has been attacked.
It is!
His sponser is SuSE, the famed NAZI Linux distribution.
The fact is that you are just as likely to be a victim of a terrorist attack today as you were 50 years ago. People have publically stated their intentions of detroying the US for even longer than that.
Offtopic, indeed :-) but your post demonstrates this psychological flaw. You bought the laptop a year ago, and have been at risk every day since. Don't think that it's a new problem when it finally blows up!
UNIX, S/390, and MacOS come to mind -- they have changed greatly in form, but the original intentions of the designs are still intact. Microsoft, on the other hand, decides to change their OS goals every five years. (Microsoft also has a history of good, iterative technologies; DDE led to OLE led to COM led to DCOM/COM+/DNA are the foundations of .NET. But even the goals of NT have changed in the last five years.)
IBM's JVM is also notoriously unreliable. Ask the iPlanet goons why it took them 200 years to port Enterprise Web Server 4.1 to AIX.
Regardless, I am pleased to see the availability hardware that will run Oracle 9i without thrashing. :-)