I frequently explain my job to people as "roadie for programmers." Their job is to get up there and be Eric Clapton, my job is to make sure everything is in place for that to happen. We wear black shirts and work in the background.
I tried it on a low-end laptop with four Core 2 Duo chips and only 8 gig of memory, and trust me: $NEXT_VERSION is shaping up to be one heck of a product.
WordPad and Paint have seen major overhauls to their user interfaces. Forget the freetards and their "distros" full of all sorts of useless shovelware like "FireFox" and "OpenOffice" and, haha, "GIMP"! - the bundled software with Windows $NEXT_VERSION is clear, simple, sparse and to-the-point. The much-loved $HATED_VERSION user interface from Office $HATED_VERSION is now part of WordPad and Paint!
I am so excited about $NEXT_VERSION of Windows. It will go beyond just solving all of the problems with $CURRENT_VERSION, it will be an entirely new paradigm. Forget about security problems, those are all fixed in $NEXT_VERSION. And they're finally ridding themselves of $ANCIENT_LEGACY_STUFF.
Also, there'll be $DATABASE_FILESYSTEM. It'll be awesome!
I wonder how $NEXT_VERSION will compare to $NEXT_NEXT_VERSION.
Apple is evil, but the music business is evil and stupid. If you were going to pick someone to make Apple look good, you couldn't pick better villains.
Do the record companies realise they're competing with free? Apple realise this. Raising the prices will drive away customers who do have another option. No-one buys music because it's the only way to get it, anyone who buys music these days does so because they want to.
More sites should use reCaptcha. If the spammers break that, they'll have advanced computer science and the freeing of knowledge.
(Wikimedia considered reCaptcha, but insists on running on all-free software. ReCaptcha won't release any of their software or data, so it's out of the running. I suppose we could reimplement it if anyone cares enough to spend time doing so.)
[We used a bit of Java before it was entirely free - e.g. the Lucene search, which sucks much less than it used to and is pretty much usable now - but were reasonably sure Sun would proceed with their program to free it and we wouldn't be embarrassed by it. Which is just as well, 'cos we tried a Mono version of the Lucene search and it ran at about half the speed.]
Apple has made a vast success of evil! The slickness of total control. Freedom from the burden of choice.
Never mind. I'm sure there'll be an article on RoughlyDrafted explaining precisely how this was all part of the plan and is absolutely the best possible move anyone could ever have made and we'd all have to be foolish not to have realised this was precisely how it was going to play out, and also Microsoft sucks. It'll probably have that really funny graphic of a Zune-headed Ballmer running screaming from the Zune Hindenburg.
(I like RoughlyDrafted, and his facts are generally accurate, it just gets a bit monotonous at times...)
It's Windows Vaporware. It's a dessert wax and a floor topping. It's any marketing spin at all that they think might put people off competitors' products.
I am so excited about $NEXT_VERSION of Windows. It will go beyond just solving all of the problems with $CURRENT_VERSION, it will be an entirely new paradigm. Forget about security problems, those are all fixed in $NEXT_VERSION. And they're finally ridding themselves of $ANCIENT_LEGACY_STUFF.
Also, there'll be $DATABASE_FILESYSTEM. It'll be awesome!
I wonder how $NEXT_VERSION will compare to $NEXT_NEXT_VERSION.
("Windows Cloud"? Good freakin' gosh, what do they have for a marketing department?)
I installed the Linux realplayer to listen to BBC. I'm still surprised by how usable and well-behaved it is. (It's their open-sourced Helix player with their proprietary codec added.)
RealPlayer was famously the most obnoxious useful software on Windows in the 1990s. Getting rid of it was like clearing kudzu. After that, it's jawdropping that the Linux client is quite well-behaved.
(RealPlayer for Linux is actually a really good media player. Works well, plays everything, none of the quasi-spyware behaviour it was famous for on Windows. CULTURE SHOCK!)
My girlfriend got a job as a sysadmin at a new media agency by pulling out her Tungsten C and cracking their wireless networks right there. "You need these secured." One of her first jobs was to run Ethernet everywhere and keep one very locked-down wifi in the conference room.
(They got wifi everywhere cos it was l33t and k3wl and stuff. And it was several networks all on channel 6, as were the ones for other businesses on the floors above and below that were interfering. FAIL.)
If it was satire, I'd say something like "The pictures on the camera were from MI6's new initiative to recruit people through Facebook." Oh wait, that's a real story. o_0
Slashdot Mirror
I'm still waiting for Mac OS X Kitten.
You don't wanna put them off the job forever!
The "talent" in question is that able to secure local subsidies and bribe^Wincentivise the local politicians.
There's a reason Microsoft, Dell and so on have their European bases in Ireland.
Thankfully they aren't big on local talent for the Facebook movie.
I frequently explain my job to people as "roadie for programmers." Their job is to get up there and be Eric Clapton, my job is to make sure everything is in place for that to happen. We wear black shirts and work in the background.
You're an aerospace sysadmin. So you're a roadie for rocket scientists.
Rocket Science = EXCITING!
So talk about how what you do holds up the exciting stuff.
I have seen the future: Windows $NEXT_VERSION Milestone $MOCKUP.
I tried it on a low-end laptop with four Core 2 Duo chips and only 8 gig of memory, and trust me: $NEXT_VERSION is shaping up to be one heck of a product.
WordPad and Paint have seen major overhauls to their user interfaces. Forget the freetards and their "distros" full of all sorts of useless shovelware like "FireFox" and "OpenOffice" and, haha, "GIMP"! - the bundled software with Windows $NEXT_VERSION is clear, simple, sparse and to-the-point. The much-loved $HATED_VERSION user interface from Office $HATED_VERSION is now part of WordPad and Paint!
I am so excited about $NEXT_VERSION of Windows. It will go beyond just solving all of the problems with $CURRENT_VERSION, it will be an entirely new paradigm. Forget about security problems, those are all fixed in $NEXT_VERSION. And they're finally ridding themselves of $ANCIENT_LEGACY_STUFF.
Also, there'll be $DATABASE_FILESYSTEM. It'll be awesome!
I wonder how $NEXT_VERSION will compare to $NEXT_NEXT_VERSION.
Damn, I misquoted! You just read the Cracked article too, huh?
I love my moderations. 50% insightful, 30% underrated, 20% troll. It's like doing a LiveJournal personality test meme.
Apple is evil, but the music business is evil and stupid. If you were going to pick someone to make Apple look good, you couldn't pick better villains.
Do the record companies realise they're competing with free? Apple realise this. Raising the prices will drive away customers who do have another option. No-one buys music because it's the only way to get it, anyone who buys music these days does so because they want to.
BitTorrent: because fuck you, Hollywood!
Apple goods are infused with narcotic addictive fumes, so you'll KEEP ON BUYING THEM. And you can't complain under the NDA. Because Apple is EVIL.
More sites should use reCaptcha. If the spammers break that, they'll have advanced computer science and the freeing of knowledge.
(Wikimedia considered reCaptcha, but insists on running on all-free software. ReCaptcha won't release any of their software or data, so it's out of the running. I suppose we could reimplement it if anyone cares enough to spend time doing so.)
[We used a bit of Java before it was entirely free - e.g. the Lucene search, which sucks much less than it used to and is pretty much usable now - but were reasonably sure Sun would proceed with their program to free it and we wouldn't be embarrassed by it. Which is just as well, 'cos we tried a Mono version of the Lucene search and it ran at about half the speed.]
First read as "John Goodman."
Apple has made a vast success of evil! The slickness of total control. Freedom from the burden of choice.
Never mind. I'm sure there'll be an article on RoughlyDrafted explaining precisely how this was all part of the plan and is absolutely the best possible move anyone could ever have made and we'd all have to be foolish not to have realised this was precisely how it was going to play out, and also Microsoft sucks. It'll probably have that really funny graphic of a Zune-headed Ballmer running screaming from the Zune Hindenburg.
(I like RoughlyDrafted, and his facts are generally accurate, it just gets a bit monotonous at times ...)
It's Windows Vaporware. It's a dessert wax and a floor topping. It's any marketing spin at all that they think might put people off competitors' products.
Anyone can talk up a hand of five aces. Producing it when called is a bit harder.
Perhaps it will have $DATABASE_FILESYSTEM!
I am so excited about $NEXT_VERSION of Windows. It will go beyond just solving all of the problems with $CURRENT_VERSION, it will be an entirely new paradigm. Forget about security problems, those are all fixed in $NEXT_VERSION. And they're finally ridding themselves of $ANCIENT_LEGACY_STUFF.
Also, there'll be $DATABASE_FILESYSTEM. It'll be awesome!
I wonder how $NEXT_VERSION will compare to $NEXT_NEXT_VERSION.
("Windows Cloud"? Good freakin' gosh, what do they have for a marketing department?)
Virginia needs to consider the economic benefits of spam.
Apple still evil. FairPlay-encrypted H.264 video at 11.
1. Bertrand Russell's Principia Mathematica got there first.
2. Godel proved the endeavour was impossible.
I'm amazed a mathematician proposed this.
... can we send the rest of them?
I installed the Linux realplayer to listen to BBC. I'm still surprised by how usable and well-behaved it is. (It's their open-sourced Helix player with their proprietary codec added.)
RealPlayer was famously the most obnoxious useful software on Windows in the 1990s. Getting rid of it was like clearing kudzu. After that, it's jawdropping that the Linux client is quite well-behaved.
When did Real become non-evil?
(RealPlayer for Linux is actually a really good media player. Works well, plays everything, none of the quasi-spyware behaviour it was famous for on Windows. CULTURE SHOCK!)
A lot of places do this. When I was at Ericsson all employees were in fact licensed for copies of Windows and Office at home on the corporate licence.
My girlfriend got a job as a sysadmin at a new media agency by pulling out her Tungsten C and cracking their wireless networks right there. "You need these secured." One of her first jobs was to run Ethernet everywhere and keep one very locked-down wifi in the conference room.
(They got wifi everywhere cos it was l33t and k3wl and stuff. And it was several networks all on channel 6, as were the ones for other businesses on the floors above and below that were interfering. FAIL.)
If it was satire, I'd say something like "The pictures on the camera were from MI6's new initiative to recruit people through Facebook." Oh wait, that's a real story. o_0