It's finally on topic after all these years! From Feb 9 2001 posted by an Anonymous Coward.
I present to you, a rather long sample of "The Real First Poster"
The stupid lameness filter is really annoying me. This reads a lot better if you disregard all of the "- Lameness Filter Filler"s at the end of each line. I had to add these to get this posted.
Mods, please feel free to mod me redundant or overrated. But please be honest, this post is not Offtopic, Flamebait or a Troll. Thank you.
May I have your attention please,- Lameness Filter Filler may I have your attention please,- Lameness Filter Filler will the real First Poster please stand up,- Lameness Filter Filler I repeat will the real First Poster please stand up- Lameness Filter Filler we're gonna have a problem here.........- Lameness Filter Filler
Ya'll act like you never seen a first poster before- Lameness Filter Filler mouse all on the floor- Lameness Filter Filler like mom and daddy just burst in the door- Lameness Filter Filler and started whoopin yer ass worse than before- Lameness Filter Filler they first had endorsed- Lameness Filter Filler buyin' ya a crappy computer (aaaaaah)- Lameness Filter Filler It's the return of the...- Lameness Filter Filler "awww..wait, no wait, you're kidding,- Lameness Filter Filler he didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"- Lameness Filter Filler and Mr. Cray said...- Lameness Filter Filler nothing you idiots, Mr Cray's dead- Lameness Filter Filler he's locked in my bassment- Lameness Filter Filler microsoft women love Sig '11- Lameness Filter Filler chicka chicka chicka First Poster,- Lameness Filter Filler "I'm sick of him, lookit him- Lameness Filter Filler walkin around, grabbin his GNU know what- Lameness Filter Filler flippin' to GNU know who"- Lameness Filter Filler "yeah, but he's so smart though"- Lameness Filter Filler yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose- Lameness Filter Filler but no worse than what's goin on in your sister's webcam (eheheheh)- Lameness Filter Filler sometimes, I wanna get on ZD and just let loose- Lameness Filter Filler but cant, but it's cool for RMS to hump a dead GNU- Lameness Filter Filler My mouse is on your link, My mouse is on your link- Lameness Filter Filler and if you're lucky, I might just give it a little click- Lameness Filter Filler and that's the message that we deliver to little kids- Lameness Filter Filler and expect them not to know what a free software is- Lameness Filter Filler of course they're gonna know what Microsoft is- Lameness Filter Filler by the time they hit 4th grade- Lameness Filter Filler they got MS-NBC, dont they?- Lameness Filter Filler we ain't nothing but omnivores- Lameness Filter Filler well, some of us carnivores- Lameness Filter Filler who read other people's mail like crackwhores- Lameness Filter Filler but if we can read your e-mail like it's available- Lameness Filter Filler then there's no reason that a man can't forge spam from your account- Lameness Filter Filler but if you feel like I feel, I got the antedote- Lameness Filter Filler trolls wave your penis birds, sing the chorus and it goes........- Lameness Filter Filler
I'm First Poster, yes, I'm the real First - Lameness Filter Filler all you other First Poster's are just imitating- Lameness Filter Filler so won't the real First Poster please stand up,- Lameness Filter Filler please stand up, please stand up- Lameness Filter Filler cause I'm First Poster, yes, I'm the real First - Lameness Filter Filler all you other First Poster's are just imitating- Lameness Filter Filler so wont the real First Poster please stand up,- Lameness Filter Filler please stand up, please stand up- Lameness Filter Filler
Sig 11 don't got to cuss in his posts to get Karma- Lameness Filter Filler well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too- Lameness Fi
For the main part, the average user gets the choice: "Should I get an operating system that plays music and video" or one without. I know which one I would choose.
It's almost like an accused rapist saying "I didn't force her to have sex with me. I gave her a choice. My hands around her throat or my penis inside of her. She freely chose the latter"
Because if you can't handle a one second shot of a bare nipple during the Super Bowl halftime show then I don't think you're ready for a stripped down anything.
The nipple wasn't bare. She had a little sun around it.
Which do you think will win the War on Terror--guns or minds?
A change in international policy is the only way to "win" the "War on Terror".
If you travel the middle east and ask people what they don't like about the USA, like the reporter who created the documentary "Searching for the Roots of 9-11" did, you'll find that even countries that are friendly (or at least neutral) about the US are full of people who don't like the fact that we support Israel in every conflict that they have in the region.
It's a bit unfair to charge the Pentagon with the task of ending a confict without giving them an opportunity to have any effect on its causes.
What people are failing to recognize is the mindset of the enemy. Usually in a war people are fighting for something tangible, money, land, or both. These people are fighting for their place in heaven. If they were fighting and dieing for a plot of land, several years of making no progress might be enough to get them to come to the negotiating table. How do your prove to the entire middle east that Mohammed Atta is not in heaven? How do you show people that they aren't making any progress? You can't.
You have to approach this problem differently. It would take a president with an awful lot of testicular fortitude to stand up to the Pro-Israel/Pro-Oil lobby and anounce that we will end ALL AID to the middle east if there are any more acts of violent by any side.
Break recruitment, and you're dealing with a handful of international criminals rather than a terrorist network.
Exactly! Convert their base into people who aren't so eager to die killing Americans.
If nothing is found, will they have any recourse against the FBI or are they screwed?
INAL, but the answer is obviously no. If the FBI has gotten a warrent by adhering to proper procedures, there would be no recourse against them. They have followed their obligations under the law. As long as the FBI didn't knowingly use false information to secure the warrant(s), then this web hosting company is just out of luck.
This isn't real life, where men have more muscle than women do (I'm not being sexist, just take an intro biology course), and are therefore superior to women in terms of pure strength, speed, etc.
Men on average, are without question stronger than women, but I'm not so sure about faster. When I was in High School I was on the track team (I was the slowest one, but I threw javelin, so I didn't have to be fast) and the fastest female runners were on par with most of the male runners.
At a higher level, like olympic or college that might be different, but in my experience the extra weight of a male's muscle can also slow him down.
The drug laws in the US are insane. For example, we all know that a large percentage of paper money has cocaine residue on it. Let's say, for the sake of argument, that you have one of these such bills. If you were to rinse it off in a swimming pool, you instantly have TONS of cocaine and if the law is interpreted literally, you can spend the rest of your life in jail for it.
There was clearly no need to shoot him to make an arrest (and in fact shooting him prevented him from being brought to justice at all, and was therefore very stupid).
The little boy that I was talking about was shot because circumstances made him appear to be a threat.
After he crashed his stolen vehicle, he started running away on foot, two police officers were chasing him. They had their weapons drawn, one of them tripped and when he landed he accidentally fired his pistol. The other officer heard a gunshot and turned to find his partner lying on the ground, he thought that his partner had been shot. He fired at the suspect, killing him.
Oh, and he was 12, for fuck's sake...
My heart goes out to his family, but he shouldn't have been out committing a felony. If I had caught someone trying to steal my vehicle, there is a good chance that I would have shot him.
And you really can't blame the police when a violent criminal creates a hostage situation and gets shot as a result of efforts to try to end it. Or when someone flees police and runs into someone else.
Christmas eve 2002 in Uniontown PA (about an hour drive from Pittsburgh) a 12 year old boy was shot by police after crashing a stolen vehicle and attempting to run away. There is much more to the story, but I'm not going to get into it here.
People were up in arms about the shooting, but if that little bastard hadn't been out committing a felony, he'd probably still be alive today.
I think that police brutality should be punished severely, but I don't blame the cops when they are in the right.
The way I look at it, they spent $45 mil fighting crime, which is mostly caused by citizens failing to make a decent living, sick of the system and just mad at everything. If they took most of that money and invested it into poverty prevension, you would see likely even better results.
Would you like a band-aid for that bleeding heart? It's an economic reality that some people will always be poor. The trick is in doing whatever you have to so that you're not one of them. Get a job. Work hard. And don't steal from people. It's not easy, but it isn't all that hard either.
Similarly, we say "color" instead of "colour", "flavor" instead of "flavour", and "television" instead of "telly".
Remeber in the US, a fag isn't a cigarette. A bonnet has no business on a car. Lift is what an elevator does. And most importantly, on this side of the pond you NEVER ask a classmate if you can "borrow" a rubber.
Actually, no. Most car doors have a more generic lock than the ignition. Once I went to drive my mom's car, sat inside, only to find the key didn't work in the ignition. That's when I realized I had never gotten my mom's car key, and had unlocked the door with MY car's key. I double checked to be sure, and my key always unlocked her car door with ease.
One of my automobiles is a black Chevy Camaro. One night a few years ago, when I was leaving a local bowling alley I went out and tried my key in the door. It wouldn't open. I couldn't figure it out, I took my key out of the door lock and looked to make sure I was using the right key. I was. Then I took a step back to think and I noticed that there were two identical black Camaros parked side by side. I casually walked over to the *other* one, opened the door and drove home.
These are cars that were built 18 years ago. Same make, model and year but the door lock cylinders are different. Either you and your mother have cheap cars or you perhaps you should try playing powerball, because the astronimical odds of you two getting automobiles with the same lock cylinders on the doors have come to pass.
What do you think of hardware manufacturers locking in games to certain platforms, whether a territorial decision or a universal one?
It's awful. It's precisely the reason why I will never buy and iteration of Halo. Microsoft fucked over Mac and PC gamers by making Halo an X-Box exclusive for so long.
Because their lawyers haven't figured out a way to assure they couldn't be held liable in the ensuing lawsuits. The day they do they will displace WalMart as the world's #1 distributor...
200+ years of case law should be more than enough.
But when you're actually embarrassed to be around her in public because your friend's nickname for her is "Bag of Hammers" (as in "Dumb as a...") it's time to find a new girl.
Or a new friend.
And like I said, she hasn't said "No" to BABJ Day, she's just luke warm to the idea.
It would take most of the fun out of a blowjob if you had to beg for a month to get it.
Dunp the frigid bitch and find yourself a freaky geek chick.
In addition to a getting me a sweet new pair of airwalks, my gf framed me a picture of Ed Vedder (who I worship) and Anthony Kiedis (who she worships) locking lips.
Awwww, how disgusting.
Nothing like a picture of two guys kissing sitting on your mantle.
Slashdot Mirror
It's finally on topic after all these years! From Feb 9 2001 posted by an Anonymous Coward.
I present to you, a rather long sample of "The Real First Poster"
The stupid lameness filter is really annoying me. This reads a lot better if you disregard all of the "- Lameness Filter Filler"s at the end of each line. I had to add these to get this posted.
Mods, please feel free to mod me redundant or overrated. But please be honest, this post is not Offtopic, Flamebait or a Troll. Thank you.
May I have your attention please,- Lameness Filter Filler
may I have your attention please,- Lameness Filter Filler
will the real First Poster please stand up,- Lameness Filter Filler
I repeat will the real First Poster please stand up- Lameness Filter Filler
we're gonna have a problem here.........- Lameness Filter Filler
Ya'll act like you never seen a first poster before- Lameness Filter Filler
mouse all on the floor- Lameness Filter Filler
like mom and daddy just burst in the door- Lameness Filter Filler
and started whoopin yer ass worse than before- Lameness Filter Filler
they first had endorsed- Lameness Filter Filler
buyin' ya a crappy computer (aaaaaah)- Lameness Filter Filler
It's the return of the...- Lameness Filter Filler
"awww..wait, no wait, you're kidding,- Lameness Filter Filler
he didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"- Lameness Filter Filler
and Mr. Cray said...- Lameness Filter Filler
nothing you idiots, Mr Cray's dead- Lameness Filter Filler
he's locked in my bassment- Lameness Filter Filler
microsoft women love Sig '11- Lameness Filter Filler
chicka chicka chicka First Poster,- Lameness Filter Filler
"I'm sick of him, lookit him- Lameness Filter Filler
walkin around, grabbin his GNU know what- Lameness Filter Filler
flippin' to GNU know who"- Lameness Filter Filler
"yeah, but he's so smart though"- Lameness Filter Filler
yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose- Lameness Filter Filler
but no worse than what's goin on in your sister's webcam (eheheheh)- Lameness Filter Filler
sometimes, I wanna get on ZD and just let loose- Lameness Filter Filler
but cant, but it's cool for RMS to hump a dead GNU- Lameness Filter Filler
My mouse is on your link, My mouse is on your link- Lameness Filter Filler
and if you're lucky, I might just give it a little click- Lameness Filter Filler
and that's the message that we deliver to little kids- Lameness Filter Filler
and expect them not to know what a free software is- Lameness Filter Filler
of course they're gonna know what Microsoft is- Lameness Filter Filler
by the time they hit 4th grade- Lameness Filter Filler
they got MS-NBC, dont they?- Lameness Filter Filler
we ain't nothing but omnivores- Lameness Filter Filler
well, some of us carnivores- Lameness Filter Filler
who read other people's mail like crackwhores- Lameness Filter Filler
but if we can read your e-mail like it's available- Lameness Filter Filler
then there's no reason that a man can't forge spam from your account- Lameness Filter Filler
but if you feel like I feel, I got the antedote- Lameness Filter Filler
trolls wave your penis birds, sing the chorus and it goes........- Lameness Filter Filler
I'm First Poster, yes, I'm the real First - Lameness Filter Filler
all you other First Poster's are just imitating- Lameness Filter Filler
so won't the real First Poster please stand up,- Lameness Filter Filler
please stand up, please stand up- Lameness Filter Filler
cause I'm First Poster, yes, I'm the real First - Lameness Filter Filler
all you other First Poster's are just imitating- Lameness Filter Filler
so wont the real First Poster please stand up,- Lameness Filter Filler
please stand up, please stand up- Lameness Filter Filler
Sig 11 don't got to cuss in his posts to get Karma- Lameness Filter Filler
well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too- Lameness Fi
At Carnegie Mellon University they project a movie on a big ass 20 foot tall screen out on Flag Staff hill. They don't seem to be having any problems.
For the main part, the average user gets the choice: "Should I get an operating system that plays music and video" or one without. I know which one I would choose.
It's almost like an accused rapist saying "I didn't force her to have sex with me. I gave her a choice. My hands around her throat or my penis inside of her. She freely chose the latter"
Because if you can't handle a one second shot of a bare nipple during the Super Bowl halftime show then I don't think you're ready for a stripped down anything.
The nipple wasn't bare. She had a little sun around it.
That's a bit of a loaded term in my opinion. We can take it the other direction and say a "Less bloated OS".
Which do you think will win the War on Terror--guns or minds?
A change in international policy is the only way to "win" the "War on Terror".
If you travel the middle east and ask people what they don't like about the USA, like the reporter who created the documentary "Searching for the Roots of 9-11" did, you'll find that even countries that are friendly (or at least neutral) about the US are full of people who don't like the fact that we support Israel in every conflict that they have in the region.
It's a bit unfair to charge the Pentagon with the task of ending a confict without giving them an opportunity to have any effect on its causes.
What people are failing to recognize is the mindset of the enemy. Usually in a war people are fighting for something tangible, money, land, or both. These people are fighting for their place in heaven. If they were fighting and dieing for a plot of land, several years of making no progress might be enough to get them to come to the negotiating table. How do your prove to the entire middle east that Mohammed Atta is not in heaven? How do you show people that they aren't making any progress? You can't.
You have to approach this problem differently. It would take a president with an awful lot of testicular fortitude to stand up to the Pro-Israel/Pro-Oil lobby and anounce that we will end ALL AID to the middle east if there are any more acts of violent by any side.
Break recruitment, and you're dealing with a handful of international criminals rather than a terrorist network.
Exactly! Convert their base into people who aren't so eager to die killing Americans.
LK
If nothing is found, will they have any recourse against the FBI or are they screwed?
INAL, but the answer is obviously no. If the FBI has gotten a warrent by adhering to proper procedures, there would be no recourse against them. They have followed their obligations under the law. As long as the FBI didn't knowingly use false information to secure the warrant(s), then this web hosting company is just out of luck.
LK
This isn't real life, where men have more muscle than women do (I'm not being sexist, just take an intro biology course), and are therefore superior to women in terms of pure strength, speed, etc.
Men on average, are without question stronger than women, but I'm not so sure about faster. When I was in High School I was on the track team (I was the slowest one, but I threw javelin, so I didn't have to be fast) and the fastest female runners were on par with most of the male runners.
At a higher level, like olympic or college that might be different, but in my experience the extra weight of a male's muscle can also slow him down.
LK
They're playing Sims, Dance Dance REvolution, and other social, simulation and interactivity-based games.
I still vividly remember the first time I saw people playing DDR. Because one of them was an 18 year old girl with Double D Cup breasts. Mmmmmmm.
LK
The drug laws in the US are insane. For example, we all know that a large percentage of paper money has cocaine residue on it. Let's say, for the sake of argument, that you have one of these such bills. If you were to rinse it off in a swimming pool, you instantly have TONS of cocaine and if the law is interpreted literally, you can spend the rest of your life in jail for it.
That is insanity.
There was clearly no need to shoot him to make an arrest (and in fact shooting him prevented him from being brought to justice at all, and was therefore very stupid).
The little boy that I was talking about was shot because circumstances made him appear to be a threat.
After he crashed his stolen vehicle, he started running away on foot, two police officers were chasing him. They had their weapons drawn, one of them tripped and when he landed he accidentally fired his pistol. The other officer heard a gunshot and turned to find his partner lying on the ground, he thought that his partner had been shot. He fired at the suspect, killing him.
Oh, and he was 12, for fuck's sake...
My heart goes out to his family, but he shouldn't have been out committing a felony. If I had caught someone trying to steal my vehicle, there is a good chance that I would have shot him.
LK
And you really can't blame the police when a violent criminal creates a hostage situation and gets shot as a result of efforts to try to end it. Or when someone flees police and runs into someone else.
Christmas eve 2002 in Uniontown PA (about an hour drive from Pittsburgh) a 12 year old boy was shot by police after crashing a stolen vehicle and attempting to run away. There is much more to the story, but I'm not going to get into it here.
People were up in arms about the shooting, but if that little bastard hadn't been out committing a felony, he'd probably still be alive today.
I think that police brutality should be punished severely, but I don't blame the cops when they are in the right.
LK
Nice to see a splash of sanity in the midst of the 'police hate' around here.
I have plenty of hate for the police as well, but you can't blame them when someone gets caught stealing or selling crack.
LK
The way I look at it, they spent $45 mil fighting crime, which is mostly caused by citizens failing to make a decent living, sick of the system and just mad at everything. If they took most of that money and invested it into poverty prevension, you would see likely even better results.
Would you like a band-aid for that bleeding heart? It's an economic reality that some people will always be poor. The trick is in doing whatever you have to so that you're not one of them. Get a job. Work hard. And don't steal from people. It's not easy, but it isn't all that hard either.
LK
Similarly, we say "color" instead of "colour", "flavor" instead of "flavour", and "television" instead of "telly".
Remeber in the US, a fag isn't a cigarette. A bonnet has no business on a car. Lift is what an elevator does. And most importantly, on this side of the pond you NEVER ask a classmate if you can "borrow" a rubber.
Hopefully he means shipping, handling and sales tax.
Actually, no. Most car doors have a more generic lock than the ignition. Once I went to drive my mom's car, sat inside, only to find the key didn't work in the ignition. That's when I realized I had never gotten my mom's car key, and had unlocked the door with MY car's key. I double checked to be sure, and my key always unlocked her car door with ease.
One of my automobiles is a black Chevy Camaro. One night a few years ago, when I was leaving a local bowling alley I went out and tried my key in the door. It wouldn't open. I couldn't figure it out, I took my key out of the door lock and looked to make sure I was using the right key. I was. Then I took a step back to think and I noticed that there were two identical black Camaros parked side by side. I casually walked over to the *other* one, opened the door and drove home.
These are cars that were built 18 years ago. Same make, model and year but the door lock cylinders are different. Either you and your mother have cheap cars or you perhaps you should try playing powerball, because the astronimical odds of you two getting automobiles with the same lock cylinders on the doors have come to pass.
LK
What do you think of hardware manufacturers locking in games to certain platforms, whether a territorial decision or a universal one?
It's awful. It's precisely the reason why I will never buy and iteration of Halo. Microsoft fucked over Mac and PC gamers by making Halo an X-Box exclusive for so long.
LK
A German world conpiracy, a takeover of the internet backbone
Considering that country's history, it might not be all that unreasonable of an accusation.
KDE Vs Gnome
Emacs Vs Vi
MP3 Vs Ogg
and every geek's current favorite
SCO Vs The entire universe
btw I side with Linux, Linux, America, Conservative, Everyone, KDE, Vi, MP3 and The entire universe.
LK
In Soviet Russia, the police...um apparently operate the same way as those in Nevada.
Because their lawyers haven't figured out a way to assure they couldn't be held liable in the ensuing lawsuits. The day they do they will displace WalMart as the world's #1 distributor...
200+ years of case law should be more than enough.
LK
Ebay sets conditions of sales, BECAUSE THEY CAN. For no other reason.
Why do you think Ebay prohibits the sale of firearms?
LK
But when you're actually embarrassed to be around her in public because your friend's nickname for her is "Bag of Hammers" (as in "Dumb as a...") it's time to find a new girl.
Or a new friend.
And like I said, she hasn't said "No" to BABJ Day, she's just luke warm to the idea.
It would take most of the fun out of a blowjob if you had to beg for a month to get it.
Dunp the frigid bitch and find yourself a freaky geek chick.
LK
In addition to a getting me a sweet new pair of airwalks, my gf framed me a picture of Ed Vedder (who I worship) and Anthony Kiedis (who she worships) locking lips.
Awwww, how disgusting.
Nothing like a picture of two guys kissing sitting on your mantle.
You can say that again, but I'll never know.
LK