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User: durrr

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  1. Re:Well... on Google Seeks US Ban On iPhones, iPads, Macs · · Score: 5, Funny

    Meanwhile, the patent lawsuit shitstorm have been upgraded to hurricane status.

  2. Re:Botanical abuse on Disney Turns Plants Into Multi-Touch Sensors · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm growing a pair of melons and I intend to be very gentle with how I touch them.

  3. Re:Hansen again? on NASA Scientist: Heat Waves Really Are From Global Warming · · Score: -1, Troll

    I'm thinking of opening a climate news agency.

    I'd lift articles from google news and append "due to global warming" after anything seemingly negative.

    Here's some samples of amazingly informative headlines
    "Iran, Syria huddle as fighting rages due to global warming"
    "Apple Removes YouTube App From iOS 6 due to global warming"
    "Bomb Attacks Hit Afghanistan, 9 Dead due to global warming"
    "Gary Barlow suffers baby heartbreak due to global warming"
    "Liu Xiang may have hurt Achilles due to global warming"
    "J&J, Pfizer drop Alzheimer's drug after failure in trials due to global warming"
    "Think You're Gay? It Shows in Your Eyes due to global warming"

  4. Re:awesome publicity for public awareness on NASA's Own Video of Curiosity Landing Crashes Into a DMCA Takedown · · Score: 5, Funny

    What do I have to do to get automated takedown acess? There's a few million videos I don't like.

  5. Re:Nope Nope Nope on Neutrino-Powered Financial Trading In Our Future? · · Score: 3, Interesting

    While we may be able to do neutrino signal trading there should never in the first place be a benefit to super-low-latency trading as it doesn't make the market more "market-efficient" it just enables vampiric that contributes nothing but arcane instability to the whole market. HFTs are a cancer equivalent to too big to fail.

  6. It sounds like on Scientists Record Signal of Distant Black Hole Consuming Star · · Score: -1

    ... a million screaming children...

    We need congress to enact laws against this atrocious crime!

  7. Re:People want cheaper tablets on Why the Tablet Market is Really the iPad Market · · Score: 0, Troll

    The average user doesn't notice things like technical quality. They just go with what's popular and hyped.

    You could draw parallells between the average german voting for Hitler pre-ww2 and the average western citizen buying Apple today, both stemming from a advanced marketing campaign in combination with a lack of deeper understanding among the end-users that get fucked over due to their own actions in the end.

  8. Re:Another balloon... on Oculus Rift Virtual Reality Headset Blows Past Kickstarter Goal · · Score: 0

    No you fuckwit.

      I meant to tell you that the frequency of plain old simple red light, which is a high frequency wave(though still is the wave of lowest frequency in the visible spectrum) happens to be 400 THz and according to your definition of universal badness of high frequency waves then all visible light is positively lethal not to mention enormously in excess of the intensity most human generated signals are.

    Not that I expect you to understand as you couldn't spot stupid even if it was engraved into your forehead in glowing letters and you lived in a house full of mirrors with OCR-to-speech cameras with speakers blaring it out all day and night.

  9. Re:Another balloon... on Oculus Rift Virtual Reality Headset Blows Past Kickstarter Goal · · Score: 1

    I have some pretty unfortunate news to tell you in regards to the nature of visible light....

  10. Re:Put the Genie back in the bottle on NRC Accused of Ignoring Proliferation Risks With SILEX Enrichment · · Score: 1

    Russia is huge.
    China is huge.
    India is huge.
    the US is huge.
    They are all recognized to have nuclear weapons.
    The nation most likely to kill me is probably the US through some intelligence failure combined with a drone strike.

    So the US is a huge nuclear-armed threat to my life.

  11. Re:Wind Electricity on Half of India Without Electricity As Power Grid Crisis Deepens · · Score: 1

    Instead you'd end up with brown and blackouts all the time scattered over local regions due to the variability of wind, also enormous costs for building them to start with and then maintenance.

    You could of course connect all the tiny wind-islands so they can pipe away their power to where it's needed.
    At the cost of massively renovating and improving the entire grid, which would solve the current situation too.

    So your solution is to spend the money that could solve the problem on something that would just improve the situation that arises due to the problem.

  12. Re:Google... on NSA Official Disputes Chief's Claim That Agency Doesn't Collect American Data · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The worst thing Google will deliver is laser-guided advertisements.
    The worst thing NSA will deliver is laser-guided bombs.

  13. Re:Nuke it from orbit on Ask Slashdot: How To Clean Up My Work Computer Before I Leave? · · Score: 5, Funny

    Leave a DBAN disk labled "Private moments with my wife" in the optic drive as you walk out the door for the last time.

    Call in two months later and ask how long your replacement lasted.

  14. Re:Universe on Cray XK6 Supercomputer Used To Simulate Ice Cream · · Score: 2

    If we can't simulate ice-cream at the cone-size level, then how could we ever get it right when we create ice-cream planets for our fully immersive hedonistic virtual reality future?

  15. I'm afraid this is too subtle... on Ask Slashdot: Preempting Sexual Harassment In the Workplace? · · Score: 1

    We have very strict guidelines against autosexual harassment that was implemented before the ladies policies, no masturbating anywhere.

    This policy were implemented because a Dick was threatening to Sue the head off the department, because the head used its arms to touch the Dick for pleasure.

    It was a mess to solve, someone claimed it was all misinterpreted. Also, some lady apparently had brought guns to work....

  16. Re:It's called "Get A Grip!" on Ask Slashdot: Preempting Sexual Harassment In the Workplace? · · Score: 4, Funny

    We had a very elegant solution.

    We relocated the ladies to the kitchen and made sure they were gone by the time the men arrived to pick up their sandwhiches. That way our youthful male interns had to suffer no visual undressing by the old hags.

  17. Re:"...has identified several problem areas and... on US Army Developing Armor Tailored For Females · · Score: -1, Troll

    Actually, that sounds hilarious.
    Even better that you americans are circumcised and would burn your dick even more.

    Anyway, the guys name still hints at it being a not very personal space.
    Also, she can probably hid it behind her massive tits.

    Now stop being whiteknight.

  18. Re:"...has identified several problem areas and... on US Army Developing Armor Tailored For Females · · Score: 0

    Come on now. The guy with a wife with scarred tits is named Adult film producer. To just ask for a pic is a rather modest request, personally I'd request the whole filmography featuring his wife.

  19. Re:"...has identified several problem areas and... on US Army Developing Armor Tailored For Females · · Score: 5, Informative

    It's not a chainmail bikini and hence the armor rating is really shitty when worn by females.

  20. Re:Which one is John Galt? on Economists: US Poverty On Track To Hit Highest Level Since 1960s · · Score: 1

    The economic recovery

  21. Re:$50 for 8 gig is a terrible deal on 16GB Nexus 7 Sold Out On Google Play Store · · Score: 1

    For larger format tablets it's generally $100 for 16, same thing....

    Anyway, are people buying the nexus 7 because they've been dreaming of a 7" tablet or because they've been dreaming of a sub-$300 tablet? Or did this catch on due to some other arcane explanation such as hype and everyone else buying one?

  22. Re:A cure will never be FDA approved on Nanoparticle Completely Eradicates Hepatitis C Virus · · Score: 4, Funny

    Dress up like a horse and go to a vet and you can get gene therapy and stem cells treatments.

  23. Re:Deadlier? on Nanoparticle Completely Eradicates Hepatitis C Virus · · Score: 4, Informative

    Hepatitis viral infections are also not self-limiting, hep C is pretty ugly too in that it limits transplant options(read; hep c = no transplants for you) which can be a pretty shitty situation for kidney transplant candidates that can get infected by dialysis catethers and whatnot and be excluded from the queue.

    Hep B is pretty nasty too, hard to treat, survives well in the outside environment and about as virulent as a cat video on youtube.

  24. Re:Tiki Theater shooting on 12 Dead, 50 Injured at The Dark Knight Rises Showing In Colorado · · Score: 1

    The type of person that visits adult theaters are likely to be concealed carriers of biologic weapons.

  25. Re:Willing to bet.. on 12 Dead, 50 Injured at The Dark Knight Rises Showing In Colorado · · Score: 1, Troll

    I don't know what you're talking about? This is clearly just a regular showing of the 4D version.