91 mil in scholarships in exchange for future public service. Ok, wouldn't it be simpler to take that 91 million and use it to hire US citizens away from the private sector? Oh wait, that would provide instant results instead of dissappointing results during the next guy's term. --Shoeboy
You fool! When we built The Woz as part of 'Project Ubergeek', we did it right. Underneath his caring exterior is a pure rubidium exoskeleton encasing the most advanced robotics that the US army has ever developed. He can take a direct hit from a nuclear warhead and still keep teaching and designing boards. He cannot and will not be stopped until we have achieved our agenda of... Hang on, I seem to have forgotten why we did this... It'll come to me eventually... --Shoeboy
But then I realized that I had Uruguay confused with Paraguay. A quick look at the map cleared that up. I think these trademark issues that pop up around the globe are a great way to track the spread of linux. It's not really big in a country until someone thinks it would be profitable to corner the market right? Is anyone keeping a list of countries where this has happened and a date? In 3 years you could then make a movie where countries get colored in as someone tries to trademark linux. Speed it up enough and you can watch linux spread across the globe. This would be cool - assuming the trademark applications and such all get rejected - otherwise the film would be depressing. --Shoeboy
Thank you to my CTO who said "Work New Year's Eve or don't bother coming in the next day." Wow. Look at that. The author was given a choice to not work. Sure the choice had some negative consequences, but it's not like a gun was held to his/her head. The reason people in this industry are overworked is because they allow themselves to be overworked. Personally, I'd have found an opportunity to publicly advise the CTO to suck me off. Sure you get fired when you do that, but unemployment is temporary - public humiliation of senior management is forever. Acting like a loyal employee is the best way to get screwed over. Don't complain when it happens. --Shoeboy
CJE is the best comic on/. This boy is brilliant. All his fake news comments are composed and posted within a few minutes of his reading the article. Nobody else could produce that many long, well written spoofs with that kind of time frame. It takes genius. --Shoeboy
OSHA has cited my company with 6 violations for a total of $50,000 in fines.
1. Shoeboy Industries provided its sole employee a dinner of canned beans - following which the atmosphere in Shoeboy's apartment became incapable of supporting human life. 2. Shoeboy Industries also provided Shoeboy with a discount transvestite prostitute. This caused Shoeboy to develop a worrying rash. 3. Shoeboy Industries frequently leaves cartons of Camels in Shoeboy's closet, thus encouraging his smoking habit. 4. Shoeboy Industries has failed to adequately clean the restroom of Shoeboy's apartment. As a result, the population of Shoeboy's shower curtain is agitating for a seat in the UN general assembly. 5. Shoeboy Industries has failed to provide Shoeboy with treatement for his syphilis induced madness. 6. Shoeboy Industries has left the decaying corpse of a marine biologist on Shoeboy's balcony for several weeks.
An OSHA representative stated that Shoeboy needed to be taught a lesson about his evil capitalist exploitation of himself.
I'm sitting at my desk at Microsoft right now and I just did a search on 'microsoft'. Lo and behold, I saw non-microsoft sites pop up. Now Microsoft definitely IS a valid trademark, and I think you lot are definitely infriging. This is your official cease and desist notice. NO PUTTING THE WORD MICROSOFT ON A PAGE THAT WILL BE INDEXED BY A SEARCH ENGINE. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN DEATH BY ANAL ELECTROCUTION. You have been warned. --Shoeboy
Never fear, our friends in redmond are working on a way to remove these sorts of lawsuits. Microsoft Eugenics 1.0 will be released to the public in Q4-2000. It will also be bung^Hdled into the next generation of DOS^H^H^HWindows. As part of the registration process, the user will be given a simple yet accurate IQ test. If the score is below 100, a Microsoft Strike Team 4.0 squad will be sent to the users house to castrate them. Within a generation, we should see a massive drop in these sorts of lawsuits as well as a sharp drop in support calls from individuals attempting to use their mouse as a foot pedal. Microsoft has admitted that reducing the number of truly stupid individuals in the world will negatively impact their sales, but the benefit of wiping out future AOL users will be worth it. Microsoft also addressed fears that their Strike Team 4.0 squads might target users of Linux or *BSD by releasing a press release reading in part: "Why bother? None of those geeks has a prayer of reproducing anyway."
I'd be interested to know just how long ago this was. March of 99 was when I left MS. I have no idea what the current situation wrt linux is. --Shoeboy
I used work as a contractor on the microsoft campus in redmond. There are a lot of linux boxen there. The interesting thing is that almost all of them are on the desks of contractors. The deal is that those who are depending on MS stock for their retirement refuse to even think about linux, but a lot of the contractors out there are hedging their bets. There were (best guess) around 12 linux boxen in MS building 11 alone. Which is a lot considering the location. --Shoeboy
I was in an online class in college. It sucked. I was sitting at my computer when, all of a sudden, I had to take a leak. I clicked the little 'raise hand' icon to ask the teacher's permission, but my box bluescreened. When It came back up it told me that the ntdetect.com was invalid. By the time I got my box back online, class was over and I had wet myself. Twice. Good thing I was in my dorm room and nobody could see me except for my room-mate and he had a thing for urine that used to give me the creeps, but that day I was thankful for it. --Shoeboy
City investigators say at least two London financial institutions have paid out ransoms totaling more than a million pounds ($1.6 million)," says the paper.
So what's the uk rate for a competent sysadmin? 80 pounds or so? An ounce of prevention... --Shoeboy
What they fail to mention is that the irish robots won by blowing up the english robots with car bombs. The english robots responded with tinny transistor renditions of "croppies lie down," but this only made the irish robots more ferocious. They also failed to mention that the irish robots were powered by alcohol buring motors. --Shoeboy
How come everyone assumes that Macs are toys. You can customise you system just as much as you can with Win9*. Win9x is a toy too, just not a fun one. I use my win95 disk for a coaster, I'm not sure what I'd do with an I-Mac, maybe an aquarium. --Shoeboy.
Java was a language for programming garage doors and refrigerators. Somewhere along the line, Sun figured out that it could be used to make dancing pink elephants appear in a browser. Turns out that the demand for pink elephants in browsers isn't that great and can be handled by animated gifs. At any rate, Java got pushed as a one size fits all solution for problems it wasn't ready to solve. As a result implementations were buggy and slow and a lot of people (myself included) stopped caring. Linux could face the same fate. If you push people to use it when they aren't ready, they'll dislike it. Linux got where it is by being a good tool for certain tasks. The users extended it and it got to be a better tool - one that could be used for more tasks. Perl developed a following the same way. Both are strong while java is floundering and requiring massive efforts on the part of Sun. The lesson here is that pushing a technology on people who aren't ready for it is a good way to damage it. Next time you're hyping linux as the perfect solution, pause, take a deep breath and ask yourself if the people you're trying to convince have the time, energy, motivation and know-how to learn to use linux effectively. If they don't you're hurting the movement instead of helping. Also ask yourself if Linux is ready to handle the job you're suggesting it for. If it isn't, back off, get out your compiler and work on it. --Shoeboy
Face it, the one Kubrick film that Spielberg could not make anything even close to is Dr. Strangelove. We can compare horror to horror, The Shining vs. Jaws. Sci fi to Sci fi, 2001 vs. ET and close encounters. War movies Saving Private Ryan vs Full metal jacket and Paths of Glory and so on. The differences are huge, but the one Kubrick film that Spielberg is furthest from is Dr. Strangelove. Even Kubrick couldn't touch it. It is the one that distances him the most from Spielberg. --Shoeboy
Robert J White, an American neurosurgeon, said he had developed a blood-cooling system that meant a living head could be disconnected from its blood supply for up to an hour without ill-effect. forget head transplants. With this device, I might be able to make it through all the meetings my manager keeps scheduling. --Shoeboy
Shoeboy.org pucharsed for 12 million SEATTLE, WA The insanely popular web site Shoeboy.org has been purchased by an unnamed internet company for over 10 million dollars. The domain name Shoeboy.org was registered a couple of months ago, and simply points to a register.com site which states: Coming Soon! You have reached my future website. We recently registered our domain name at Register.com Despite being almost entirely devoid of content, it averages close to 18 million hits per month. Industry analysts predict that the hit count will go even higher once there is something on the site to look at. "The popularity of Shoeboy.org is amazing!" explains Michael Wood of the consulting firm eCyberCommerceWebEnterprise. "It's also totaly inexplicable. It's not that the site sucks, it's that there is literally nothing there. Why it gets so many hits is totally beyond me. One thing we do know is that it's a great site to advertise on, a total gold mine!" Shoeboy, the current owner of shoeboy.org refuses to disclose the buyer, but did inform us that the price tag had "eight digits, a decimal point and two more f***ing digits." He then did a series of back flips. When questioned about the sites popularity, Shoeboy responded, "I have no idea why it gets hit at all, but I can assure you that it's definitely _NOT_ due to perl scripts fetching the page in an infinite loop. That would be unethical." --Shoeboy
Lisa, You just don't get it. You can't quit your job and geek out all day in style unless your sugar daddy is a milionaire. Proper geeking requires a datacenter with at least 45 computers, 3 different processor architectures and 5 different operating systems. Admittedly there are a few mulitmillionaires around town, but they're all ex microsofties and would object to buying you an UltraSparc - espescially if they knew you planned to run FreeBSD on it. Get yourself a job with a company that has a huge datacenter and then you can roll around naked on a pile of ethernet cables between a Sun E500 and and Alpha GS 60. That's what I do at work - late at night when nobody is looking of course. --Shoeboy
Re:Maybe we should all move to utah
on
911 Calls Linux
·
· Score: 2
No, it's utah. I lived there for 18 years, I know. Meesa think your brain has been fried by living in the prozac capital of the world.
Re:Maybe we should all move to utah
on
911 Calls Linux
·
· Score: 2
Bad idea. If you try to explain to a group of Utahns how free software is different from free beer, they will run you out of town for mentioning the devil's brew. --Shoeboy
Re:Open Source Journalism w/compensation
on
Wired on Slashdot
·
· Score: 2
Imagine if Slashdot paid decent money for articles that rated a "5". That's incentive for you. Better yet, imagine if they paid for posts that rated a 5. You think the site is full of score whores now, wait till you get posts like "Psst... Hey buddy, moderate this up and I'll cut you in for 10%" --Shoeboy
Wow, a thoughtful question! What are you doing on/.;-) No, I don't think that programmers will starve, and I don't think that cheap software is bad. I buy commercial software from time to time, but nothing I write is ever distributed outside my company, so cheap software benefits me and doesn't cut into my cash flow. I figure that most coders are developing internal apps and are thus in the same boat as me. Cheap software just means that software companies won't turn their employees into overnight millionaires. That's fine with me, I can't imagine sympathizing with someone pulling down 70K/yr just because his stock options won't let him retire at 30. --Shoeboy
Slashdot Mirror
91 mil in scholarships in exchange for future public service.
Ok, wouldn't it be simpler to take that 91 million and use it to hire US citizens away from the private sector?
Oh wait, that would provide instant results instead of dissappointing results during the next guy's term.
--Shoeboy
You fool!
When we built The Woz as part of 'Project Ubergeek', we did it right. Underneath his caring exterior is a pure rubidium exoskeleton encasing the most advanced robotics that the US army has ever developed. He can take a direct hit from a nuclear warhead and still keep teaching and designing boards. He cannot and will not be stopped until we have achieved our agenda of...
Hang on, I seem to have forgotten why we did this...
It'll come to me eventually...
--Shoeboy
But then I realized that I had Uruguay confused with Paraguay. A quick look at the map cleared that up.
I think these trademark issues that pop up around the globe are a great way to track the spread of linux. It's not really big in a country until someone thinks it would be profitable to corner the market right? Is anyone keeping a list of countries where this has happened and a date? In 3 years you could then make a movie where countries get colored in as someone tries to trademark linux. Speed it up enough and you can watch linux spread across the globe. This would be cool - assuming the trademark applications and such all get rejected - otherwise the film would be depressing.
--Shoeboy
Thank you to my CTO who said "Work New Year's Eve or don't bother coming in the next day."
Wow. Look at that. The author was given a choice to not work. Sure the choice had some negative consequences, but it's not like a gun was held to his/her head. The reason people in this industry are overworked is because they allow themselves to be overworked. Personally, I'd have found an opportunity to publicly advise the CTO to suck me off. Sure you get fired when you do that, but unemployment is temporary - public humiliation of senior management is forever.
Acting like a loyal employee is the best way to get screwed over. Don't complain when it happens.
--Shoeboy
CJE is the best comic on /.
This boy is brilliant. All his fake news comments are composed and posted within a few minutes of his reading the article. Nobody else could produce that many long, well written spoofs with that kind of time frame. It takes genius.
--Shoeboy
OSHA has cited my company with 6 violations for a total of $50,000 in fines.
1. Shoeboy Industries provided its sole employee a dinner of canned beans - following which the atmosphere in Shoeboy's apartment became incapable of supporting human life.
2. Shoeboy Industries also provided Shoeboy with a discount transvestite prostitute. This caused Shoeboy to develop a worrying rash.
3. Shoeboy Industries frequently leaves cartons of Camels in Shoeboy's closet, thus encouraging his smoking habit.
4. Shoeboy Industries has failed to adequately clean the restroom of Shoeboy's apartment. As a result, the population of Shoeboy's shower curtain is agitating for a seat in the UN general assembly.
5. Shoeboy Industries has failed to provide Shoeboy with treatement for his syphilis induced madness.
6. Shoeboy Industries has left the decaying corpse of a marine biologist on Shoeboy's balcony for several weeks.
An OSHA representative stated that Shoeboy needed to be taught a lesson about his evil capitalist exploitation of himself.
--Shoeboy
I'm sitting at my desk at Microsoft right now and I just did a search on 'microsoft'. Lo and behold, I saw non-microsoft sites pop up. Now Microsoft definitely IS a valid trademark, and I think you lot are definitely infriging. This is your official cease and desist notice. NO PUTTING THE WORD MICROSOFT ON A PAGE THAT WILL BE INDEXED BY A SEARCH ENGINE. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN DEATH BY ANAL ELECTROCUTION. You have been warned.
--Shoeboy
Never fear, our friends in redmond are working on a way to remove these sorts of lawsuits. Microsoft Eugenics 1.0 will be released to the public in Q4-2000. It will also be bung^Hdled into the next generation of DOS^H^H^HWindows. As part of the registration process, the user will be given a simple yet accurate IQ test. If the score is below 100, a Microsoft Strike Team 4.0 squad will be sent to the users house to castrate them. Within a generation, we should see a massive drop in these sorts of lawsuits as well as a sharp drop in support calls from individuals attempting to use their mouse as a foot pedal. Microsoft has admitted that reducing the number of truly stupid individuals in the world will negatively impact their sales, but the benefit of wiping out future AOL users will be worth it. Microsoft also addressed fears that their Strike Team 4.0 squads might target users of Linux or *BSD by releasing a press release reading in part: "Why bother? None of those geeks has a prayer of reproducing anyway."
--Shoeboy
I'd be interested to know just how long ago this was.
March of 99 was when I left MS. I have no idea what the current situation wrt linux is.
--Shoeboy
I used work as a contractor on the microsoft campus in redmond. There are a lot of linux boxen there. The interesting thing is that almost all of them are on the desks of contractors. The deal is that those who are depending on MS stock for their retirement refuse to even think about linux, but a lot of the contractors out there are hedging their bets. There were (best guess) around 12 linux boxen in MS building 11 alone. Which is a lot considering the location.
--Shoeboy
I was in an online class in college. It sucked. I was sitting at my computer when, all of a sudden, I had to take a leak. I clicked the little 'raise hand' icon to ask the teacher's permission, but my box bluescreened. When It came back up it told me that the ntdetect.com was invalid. By the time I got my box back online, class was over and I had wet myself. Twice. Good thing I was in my dorm room and nobody could see me except for my room-mate and he had a thing for urine that used to give me the creeps, but that day I was thankful for it.
--Shoeboy
City investigators say at least two London financial institutions have paid out ransoms totaling more than a million pounds ($1.6 million)," says the paper.
So what's the uk rate for a competent sysadmin? 80 pounds or so? An ounce of prevention...
--Shoeboy
What they fail to mention is that the irish robots won by blowing up the english robots with car bombs. The english robots responded with tinny transistor renditions of "croppies lie down," but this only made the irish robots more ferocious. They also failed to mention that the irish robots were powered by alcohol buring motors.
--Shoeboy
How come everyone assumes that Macs are toys. You can customise you system just as much as you can with Win9*. Win9x is a toy too, just not a fun one. I use my win95 disk for a coaster, I'm not sure what I'd do with an I-Mac, maybe an aquarium.
--Shoeboy.
Java was a language for programming garage doors and refrigerators. Somewhere along the line, Sun figured out that it could be used to make dancing pink elephants appear in a browser. Turns out that the demand for pink elephants in browsers isn't that great and can be handled by animated gifs. At any rate, Java got pushed as a one size fits all solution for problems it wasn't ready to solve. As a result implementations were buggy and slow and a lot of people (myself included) stopped caring. Linux could face the same fate. If you push people to use it when they aren't ready, they'll dislike it. Linux got where it is by being a good tool for certain tasks. The users extended it and it got to be a better tool - one that could be used for more tasks. Perl developed a following the same way. Both are strong while java is floundering and requiring massive efforts on the part of Sun. The lesson here is that pushing a technology on people who aren't ready for it is a good way to damage it. Next time you're hyping linux as the perfect solution, pause, take a deep breath and ask yourself if the people you're trying to convince have the time, energy, motivation and know-how to learn to use linux effectively. If they don't you're hurting the movement instead of helping. Also ask yourself if Linux is ready to handle the job you're suggesting it for. If it isn't, back off, get out your compiler and work on it.
--Shoeboy
Face it, the one Kubrick film that Spielberg could not make anything even close to is Dr. Strangelove. We can compare horror to horror, The Shining vs. Jaws. Sci fi to Sci fi, 2001 vs. ET and close encounters. War movies Saving Private Ryan vs Full metal jacket and Paths of Glory and so on. The differences are huge, but the one Kubrick film that Spielberg is furthest from is Dr. Strangelove. Even Kubrick couldn't touch it. It is the one that distances him the most from Spielberg.
--Shoeboy
Robert J White, an American neurosurgeon, said he had developed a blood-cooling system that meant a living head could be disconnected from its blood supply for up to an hour without ill-effect. forget head transplants. With this device, I might be able to make it through all the meetings my manager keeps scheduling.
--Shoeboy
I meant to put a after WA, and I didn't mean to put an exact figure in the first line. Oops. What can I say, I'm an idiot.
--Shoeboy
Shoeboy.org pucharsed for 12 million
SEATTLE, WA The insanely popular web site Shoeboy.org has been purchased by an unnamed internet company for over 10 million dollars. The domain name Shoeboy.org was registered a couple of months ago, and simply points to a register.com site which states:
Coming Soon!
You have reached my future website.
We recently registered our domain name at
Register.com
Despite being almost entirely devoid of content, it averages close to 18 million hits per month.
Industry analysts predict that the hit count will go even higher once there is something on the site to look at.
"The popularity of Shoeboy.org is amazing!" explains Michael Wood of the consulting firm eCyberCommerceWebEnterprise. "It's also totaly inexplicable. It's not that the site sucks, it's that there is literally nothing there. Why it gets so many hits is totally beyond me. One thing we do know is that it's a great site to advertise on, a total gold mine!"
Shoeboy, the current owner of shoeboy.org refuses to disclose the buyer, but did inform us that the price tag had "eight digits, a decimal point and two more f***ing digits." He then did a series of back flips.
When questioned about the sites popularity, Shoeboy responded, "I have no idea why it gets hit at all, but I can assure you that it's definitely _NOT_ due to perl scripts fetching the page in an infinite loop. That would be unethical."
--Shoeboy
E500 Oops, that should read E5000. Scott McNealy is going to come to my house with a flamethrower now.
--Shoeboy
Lisa,
You just don't get it. You can't quit your job and geek out all day in style unless your sugar daddy is a milionaire. Proper geeking requires a datacenter with at least 45 computers, 3 different processor architectures and 5 different operating systems. Admittedly there are a few mulitmillionaires around town, but they're all ex microsofties and would object to buying you an UltraSparc - espescially if they knew you planned to run FreeBSD on it. Get yourself a job with a company that has a huge datacenter and then you can roll around naked on a pile of ethernet cables between a Sun E500 and and Alpha GS 60. That's what I do at work - late at night when nobody is looking of course.
--Shoeboy
No, it's utah. I lived there for 18 years, I know. Meesa think your brain has been fried by living in the prozac capital of the world.
Bad idea. If you try to explain to a group of Utahns how free software is different from free beer, they will run you out of town for mentioning the devil's brew.
--Shoeboy
Imagine if Slashdot paid decent money for articles that rated a "5". That's incentive for you.
Better yet, imagine if they paid for posts that rated a 5. You think the site is full of score whores now, wait till you get posts like "Psst... Hey buddy, moderate this up and I'll cut you in for 10%"
--Shoeboy
Wow, a thoughtful question! What are you doing on /. ;-) No, I don't think that programmers will starve, and I don't think that cheap software is bad. I buy commercial software from time to time, but nothing I write is ever distributed outside my company, so cheap software benefits me and doesn't cut into my cash flow. I figure that most coders are developing internal apps and are thus in the same boat as me. Cheap software just means that software companies won't turn their employees into overnight millionaires. That's fine with me, I can't imagine sympathizing with someone pulling down 70K/yr just because his stock options won't let him retire at 30.
--Shoeboy