Wake me up when they can burn LIFE EXPERIENCE to a CD. Then and only then can you even come close to approximating what we are as human beings.
A stored DNA sequence is about as relevant to our desire for immortality as a camera. What does a snapshot of you say about who you are and the way you think?
Here are some specific ideas that have worked for me and my clients now and in the past... a lot of this may seem obvious, but you'd be amazed how many bands don't do this stuff:
* Collect e-mail addresses of everyone who attends your gigs or is interested in the band - be aggressive about this
* Maintain at least two mailing lists: one low traffic band-to-the-fans-type list with major announcements, and another "fan list" where fans can talk amongst themselves
* Create a database of fans by location and target them for specific promo mailings to let them know about when the band is in their region
* Add a messageboard/guestbook to your web site and monitor it - make sure it stays positive and upbeat, yet gives fans a chance to publicly post their support and honest comments
* FREELY distribute your music in good quality versions; don't worry about making money off publishing (i.e. mechanical royalties - from sales of CDs) If you believe in the band, give away your product to get the world out and the loyal fans will support you later.
* Make sure your web site has an area for press professionals with high-resolution images and other material that they can use to republish
* Contrary to what other people think, your web site can suck if the band doesn't, but I worry more about really-attractive web sites that promote crap bands - so spend more energy making sure your product is good quality (the music, the recording, the production) than some stupid flash splash page.
* Get the band involved! The artists must be active online, posting journals, receiving and responding to e-mail and generally appearing to be "accessible" to their fans.
* BUZZ - "Viral Marketing" - very important but not critical, and somewhat controversial. Using various guerilla methods of promotion (i.e. talking up the band in chat rooms as a fan, putting music in rotation in the peer-to-peer arena with titles like "Bunghole_Band-Sounds_like_Metallica.mp3"
I'd be careful about stuff though... it's better to be honest than rename your music under the guise of a major band and mislead people - call me idealistic but I think that shit comes back to you later if you practice dishonorably deceptive marketing. If you're an indie band, you're likely rebelling against that type of BS so don't do it.
* Work deals with other bands/sites catering to your demographic audience. Do link exchanges - cross-promote each other's music
* Internet radio? Bah. You'll get more people listening to you posting on IUMA.com or MP3.com, not that you want to ignore ANY opportunity to promote yourself, but most of these net radio stations are people talking to themselves - it hasn't caught on yet and every PD thinks what he likes is what the rest of the world will turn everything else off to hear.
* Not necessarily net-related but: Get on CMJ - College Music Journal is "da shit" when it comes to getting music to PDs (Program Directors at radio stations). I believe CMJ is responsible for breaking more new acts than all the cocaine ever sniffed by a radio station employee.
* BE OPEN-MINDED - None of this works if you are unwilling to be receptive to constructive criticism. Don't think that your band is the best - always try to improve and remember that if you spend time promoting shit as if it is caviar, word will spread a lot faster that you're peddling shit than you can ever convince people its caviar. So take every criticism you receive seriously - but also note where people are coming from - some players will put you down because you are a threat, but others may be sincere in telling you you aren't ready for what you're trying to break into. And be patient about that.. if your band isn't ready, don't chase CMJ and blow the one chance you might have of them giving you a listen.
Learn to translate "fan language." When someone comes up to you after a gig and says, "The bass playing was awesome", that means, "The band sucked except for the bass player" - work on your weaknesses much more than you celebrate your strengths and your band will basically market itself - you just provide the tools.
I work with a number of bands who have been signed to major labels - the biggest in the industry, some of whom still are; many of whom were summarily dumped due to inter-company politics, line-item accounting and circumstance. I've managed bands; I've handled promotion from all aspects and I'm here to say the major label is a thing of the past, unless: a) you look gorgeous and want to be fully exploited for a few years and then dumped and know how to save your advance checks, b) are willing to give up almost all of your publishing royalties.
The majors don't work the way they used to. They don't "develop" acts any more, unless it's part of the current fad formula and they can own the majority of you. Otherwise, any decent, hard working band should not look at a major record deal as anything more than one of those scam "mortgage your home and get some cash"-type deals because that's exactly what they are. You get signed, you get a bonus, but then the label charges you for everything they do for you (after hugely inflating the price) and in the end you don't end up with anything except your advance, which most bands blow immediately, then they're stuck trying to make a living off touring.
In the past, the major label was necessary for distribution - the Internet puts a dent in that monopoly. So it leaves little reason to sign to a major except that some still believe it gives a band some credibility, but others think exactly the opposite.
Ironically, nowadays, a label is more likely to court a band when they don't need a label: they've already proven they can sell their product and work their ass off, so it's of little risk for the label, so why even sign? One of my bands was signed to one of the biggest lables in the biz, and then they didn't spend hardly a penny to promote them, then in a merger deal with another company let them go and handed them a bill for $2,000,000.00 for expenses! The biggest phallacy in the world is that you've "made it" if you're signed. That's like saying you've found "love" the first time you're gang raped in prison. But that's just my opinion.
What does this have to do with online promotion? Everything. The Internet is the scariest thing to ever come along to the major labels and the "music mafia". Every band that fully-exploits the Net to promote themselves and distribute their music bypasses the traditional monopolies and insider deals with the mega-corporations who now own both lables and radio and put their artists exclusively in rotation. The solution is to go grass roots.. reach people online, and ultimately demand will force the big players into having to distribute and embrace those bands that don't fit their exploitive formulas.
My friend who also saw the movie (and thought it sucked just like almost everyone in the theatre), was incredibly amused at the scene where Cruise's wife tosses his eyebal onto the organ at the penal cology and the eyeball has this amazing ability to play a CHORD on the keyboard based on its weight... you see her throw the eyeball, then you hear it hit the keyboard and cause the keyboard to be playing, but when you look at the eyeball on the keyboard, it's not heavy enough, nor is it making the key on the keyboard depressed, but you still here, not just a note, but a chord. This is a good example of how one needs to suspend all form of disblief in order to enjoy this goofy movie. It makes no sense - there is no path or patter which justifies the "Department of precrime" and almost everything that goes on...
You have black market doctors who seem to have the capability to replace human eyeballs, but then when someone needs some data, a guy has to carry a plexiglass "data disk" across the room and insert it into some goofy-looking heads up display. It's hilarious.
Don't even get me started on the stupid "gross scenes" in the movie, obviously put there to amuse Spielberg's kids and of no benefit to the plot.
This movie sucks.
Viral marketing at its finest
on
Minority Report
·
· Score: 1
It has dawned on me that the most technologically advanced aspect of the movie, "Minority Report" is the obvious army of clerical workers who are busy creating a "positive buzz" for this piece-of-trash movie online.
This movie SUCKED HUGE - are you people morons?
on
Minority Report
·
· Score: -1, Troll
Am I the only one with half a brain that wasn't totally dazzled by the mediocre CGI to realize this was a hugely lame movie, derivative of everything from Blade Runner and Gattica to 12 Monkeys and A Clockwork Orange. Not to mention that I HATED this movie the first time it ran and was called "A.I."!!
C'mon, it's the same underlying plot motivation as in A.I. with the search for the long lost person, and the stupid plots which are thrown in your face because they don't make sense. Why has Cruise's character singled out one case from many to research? Well, because in the end it turns out to be the key that unlocks everything - don't you know? No we don't know because we didn't walk into the theatre with the movie script in our hands you idiots... I hate it when movies can't come up with a convincing reason to take the plot in a particular direction and instead merely tell you, "This will be important later..." as if that would really happen in real life.
Let's talk about the horrible "sci-fi" in this sad-excuse-for-a-science-fiction piece of trash. I used to work for a company that manufactured retina scanning devices and I laughed the whole time Cruise carried around his old eyeballs in a ziplok bag and used them to get past various retinal scanning security devices. In reality, once the eyes have been removed, they wouldn't work in a retinal scanner - hence the usefulness of the technology (as opposed to fingerprints). Oh yea, and obviously in the future, when someone becomes a fugitive, ALL THEIR SECURITY CODES CONTINUE TO REMAIN IN EFFECT. This movie has more holes in it than Melissa Etheridge at a benefit for Swiss Cheese!!
Please, someone stop Spielberg before he makes another crappy movie and wastes my $7!!!
The game was really fun when it first came out but they've stretched the premise way too thin without introducing much innovation. The Sims was a bit overrated too if you ask me. When I watched a guy spend 3 hours playing the Sims in a local Internet cafe, doing nothing but forcing some woman to drink coffee over and over and piss on herself, I knew this software had hit the wall.
These people need to come up with something new and interesting.
In my experience SCSI drives last a LOT longer than IDE drives. Aside from performance, they run longer. I have a server that is running on a Seagate Barricuda 4G drive that has not been turned off in almost 9 years -- let's see an IDE drive do that!
One drive I'll never use whether SCSI or IDE is Quantum.. pieces of crap
I remember receiving the Nigerian scam letters in snail mail 10 years ago. I laughed then at anyone who was STUPID enough to fall for the idea that that they're going to get a few million dollars for doing next to nothing.
My feeling on this scan is this: It's a litmus test for idiots, to separate money from greedy morons that don't deserve to have it. I actually like this scam circulating because it's quite efficient at keeping lusers occupied with the idea that they can get something for nothing so they don't bother the rest of us with their boneheaded get-rich-quick schemes.
I could do without the spam for sure, but this scam serves two useful purposes:
1. It reinforces my impression that Nigeria is probably the last place on earth I would want to visit or do business with.
2. It helps extricate money from people who don't deserve to have it. If you fall for this scam, you deserve to lose your money. It's like financial survival of the fittest.
Slashdot Mirror
Wake me up when they can burn LIFE EXPERIENCE to a CD. Then and only then can you even come close to approximating what we are as human beings.
A stored DNA sequence is about as relevant to our desire for immortality as a camera. What does a snapshot of you say about who you are and the way you think?
What a fucking joke.
Here are some specific ideas that have worked for me and my clients now and in the past... a lot of this may seem obvious, but you'd be amazed how many bands don't do this stuff:
* Collect e-mail addresses of everyone who attends your gigs or is interested in the band - be aggressive about this
* Maintain at least two mailing lists: one low traffic band-to-the-fans-type list with major announcements, and another "fan list" where fans can talk amongst themselves
* Create a database of fans by location and target them for specific promo mailings to let them know about when the band is in their region
* Add a messageboard/guestbook to your web site and monitor it - make sure it stays positive and upbeat, yet gives fans a chance to publicly post their support and honest comments
* FREELY distribute your music in good quality versions; don't worry about making money off publishing (i.e. mechanical royalties - from sales of CDs) If you believe in the band, give away your product to get the world out and the loyal fans will support you later.
* Make sure your web site has an area for press professionals with high-resolution images and other material that they can use to republish
* Contrary to what other people think, your web site can suck if the band doesn't, but I worry more about really-attractive web sites that promote crap bands - so spend more energy making sure your product is good quality (the music, the recording, the production) than some stupid flash splash page.
* Get the band involved! The artists must be active online, posting journals, receiving and responding to e-mail and generally appearing to be "accessible" to their fans.
* BUZZ - "Viral Marketing" - very important but not critical, and somewhat controversial. Using various guerilla methods of promotion (i.e. talking up the band in chat rooms as a fan, putting music in rotation in the peer-to-peer arena with titles like "Bunghole_Band-Sounds_like_Metallica.mp3"
I'd be careful about stuff though... it's better to be honest than rename your music under the guise of a major band and mislead people - call me idealistic but I think that shit comes back to you later if you practice dishonorably deceptive marketing. If you're an indie band, you're likely rebelling against that type of BS so don't do it.
* Work deals with other bands/sites catering to your demographic audience. Do link exchanges - cross-promote each other's music
* Internet radio? Bah. You'll get more people listening to you posting on IUMA.com or MP3.com, not that you want to ignore ANY opportunity to promote yourself, but most of these net radio stations are people talking to themselves - it hasn't caught on yet and every PD thinks what he likes is what the rest of the world will turn everything else off to hear.
* Not necessarily net-related but: Get on CMJ - College Music Journal is "da shit" when it comes to getting music to PDs (Program Directors at radio stations). I believe CMJ is responsible for breaking more new acts than all the cocaine ever sniffed by a radio station employee.
* BE OPEN-MINDED - None of this works if you are unwilling to be receptive to constructive criticism. Don't think that your band is the best - always try to improve and remember that if you spend time promoting shit as if it is caviar, word will spread a lot faster that you're peddling shit than you can ever convince people its caviar. So take every criticism you receive seriously - but also note where people are coming from - some players will put you down because you are a threat, but others may be sincere in telling you you aren't ready for what you're trying to break into. And be patient about that.. if your band isn't ready, don't chase CMJ and blow the one chance you might have of them giving you a listen.
Learn to translate "fan language." When someone comes up to you after a gig and says, "The bass playing was awesome", that means, "The band sucked except for the bass player" - work on your weaknesses much more than you celebrate your strengths and your band will basically market itself - you just provide the tools.
I work with a number of bands who have been signed to major labels - the biggest in the industry, some of whom still are; many of whom were summarily dumped due to inter-company politics, line-item accounting and circumstance. I've managed bands; I've handled promotion from all aspects and I'm here to say the major label is a thing of the past, unless: a) you look gorgeous and want to be fully exploited for a few years and then dumped and know how to save your advance checks, b) are willing to give up almost all of your publishing royalties.
The majors don't work the way they used to. They don't "develop" acts any more, unless it's part of the current fad formula and they can own the majority of you. Otherwise, any decent, hard working band should not look at a major record deal as anything more than one of those scam "mortgage your home and get some cash"-type deals because that's exactly what they are. You get signed, you get a bonus, but then the label charges you for everything they do for you (after hugely inflating the price) and in the end you don't end up with anything except your advance, which most bands blow immediately, then they're stuck trying to make a living off touring.
In the past, the major label was necessary for distribution - the Internet puts a dent in that monopoly. So it leaves little reason to sign to a major except that some still believe it gives a band some credibility, but others think exactly the opposite.
Ironically, nowadays, a label is more likely to court a band when they don't need a label: they've already proven they can sell their product and work their ass off, so it's of little risk for the label, so why even sign? One of my bands was signed to one of the biggest lables in the biz, and then they didn't spend hardly a penny to promote them, then in a merger deal with another company let them go and handed them a bill for $2,000,000.00 for expenses! The biggest phallacy in the world is that you've "made it" if you're signed. That's like saying you've found "love" the first time you're gang raped in prison. But that's just my opinion.
What does this have to do with online promotion? Everything. The Internet is the scariest thing to ever come along to the major labels and the "music mafia". Every band that fully-exploits the Net to promote themselves and distribute their music bypasses the traditional monopolies and insider deals with the mega-corporations who now own both lables and radio and put their artists exclusively in rotation. The solution is to go grass roots.. reach people online, and ultimately demand will force the big players into having to distribute and embrace those bands that don't fit their exploitive formulas.
So ROCK ON...LINE
My friend who also saw the movie (and thought it sucked just like almost everyone in the theatre), was incredibly amused at the scene where Cruise's wife tosses his eyebal onto the organ at the penal cology and the eyeball has this amazing ability to play a CHORD on the keyboard based on its weight... you see her throw the eyeball, then you hear it hit the keyboard and cause the keyboard to be playing, but when you look at the eyeball on the keyboard, it's not heavy enough, nor is it making the key on the keyboard depressed, but you still here, not just a note, but a chord. This is a good example of how one needs to suspend all form of disblief in order to enjoy this goofy movie. It makes no sense - there is no path or patter which justifies the "Department of precrime" and almost everything that goes on...
You have black market doctors who seem to have the capability to replace human eyeballs, but then when someone needs some data, a guy has to carry a plexiglass "data disk" across the room and insert it into some goofy-looking heads up display. It's hilarious.
Don't even get me started on the stupid "gross scenes" in the movie, obviously put there to amuse Spielberg's kids and of no benefit to the plot.
This movie sucks.
It has dawned on me that the most technologically advanced aspect of the movie, "Minority Report" is the obvious army of clerical workers who are busy creating a "positive buzz" for this piece-of-trash movie online.
Am I the only one with half a brain that wasn't totally dazzled by the mediocre CGI to realize this was a hugely lame movie, derivative of everything from Blade Runner and Gattica to 12 Monkeys and A Clockwork Orange. Not to mention that I HATED this movie the first time it ran and was called "A.I."!!
C'mon, it's the same underlying plot motivation as in A.I. with the search for the long lost person, and the stupid plots which are thrown in your face because they don't make sense. Why has Cruise's character singled out one case from many to research? Well, because in the end it turns out to be the key that unlocks everything - don't you know? No we don't know because we didn't walk into the theatre with the movie script in our hands you idiots... I hate it when movies can't come up with a convincing reason to take the plot in a particular direction and instead merely tell you, "This will be important later..." as if that would really happen in real life.
Let's talk about the horrible "sci-fi" in this sad-excuse-for-a-science-fiction piece of trash. I used to work for a company that manufactured retina scanning devices and I laughed the whole time Cruise carried around his old eyeballs in a ziplok bag and used them to get past various retinal scanning security devices. In reality, once the eyes have been removed, they wouldn't work in a retinal scanner - hence the usefulness of the technology (as opposed to fingerprints). Oh yea, and obviously in the future, when someone becomes a fugitive, ALL THEIR SECURITY CODES CONTINUE TO REMAIN IN EFFECT. This movie has more holes in it than Melissa Etheridge at a benefit for Swiss Cheese!!
Please, someone stop Spielberg before he makes another crappy movie and wastes my $7!!!
The game was really fun when it first came out but they've stretched the premise way too thin without introducing much innovation. The Sims was a bit overrated too if you ask me. When I watched a guy spend 3 hours playing the Sims in a local Internet cafe, doing nothing but forcing some woman to drink coffee over and over and piss on herself, I knew this software had hit the wall.
These people need to come up with something new and interesting.
In my experience SCSI drives last a LOT longer than IDE drives. Aside from performance, they run longer. I have a server that is running on a Seagate Barricuda 4G drive that has not been turned off in almost 9 years -- let's see an IDE drive do that!
One drive I'll never use whether SCSI or IDE is Quantum.. pieces of crap
I remember receiving the Nigerian scam letters in snail mail 10 years ago. I laughed then at anyone who was STUPID enough to fall for the idea that that they're going to get a few million dollars for doing next to nothing.
My feeling on this scan is this: It's a litmus test for idiots, to separate money from greedy morons that don't deserve to have it. I actually like this scam circulating because it's quite efficient at keeping lusers occupied with the idea that they can get something for nothing so they don't bother the rest of us with their boneheaded get-rich-quick schemes.
I could do without the spam for sure, but this scam serves two useful purposes:
1. It reinforces my impression that Nigeria is probably the last place on earth I would want to visit or do business with.
2. It helps extricate money from people who don't deserve to have it. If you fall for this scam, you deserve to lose your money. It's like financial survival of the fittest.