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  1. On further reflection, I'm thinking that the fopen() would probably cause an explosion that would make matter/antimatter look like Alka-Seltzer.

  2. OMFG on New Zero-Day Vulnerability Found In Adobe Flash Player (gbhackers.com) · · Score: 4, Funny

    A Flash SWF file embedded in a MS Word file. What could possibly go wrong?

  3. Re:how about this? on Researchers Find More Evidence For the Strange Link Between Sugar and Alzheimer's (sciencealert.com) · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    WARNING!! NSFW!

  4. Uhhh. First... What was I going to say?

  5. I think the AC was simply reacting to the syntax of "scientists did X in 2020".

  6. Re:Gay Boners For Gay BeauHD on Half-Assed Solar Geoengineering Is Worse Than Climate Change Itself (vice.com) · · Score: 1

    Profanity in the headlines now? Really?

    Calm down, it's just a spill chucking error. They meant to say you could either do solar geoengineering fast or half-fast.

  7. Re:Bubble nonsense. on Netflix Is Now Worth More Than $100 Billion (techcrunch.com) · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Indeed. Unsustainable growth is the only thing Wall Street analysts respect. What happens to the Netflix stock price (market cap) when new subscriptions (inevitably) plateau?

  8. Re:Nothing of value was lost on The Linux Kernel Mailing List is Down (lkml.org) · · Score: 5, Funny

    No. This is serious. I understand that as a work-around, Linus had to go to the park and yell at strangers.

  9. Re:Grunthos the Flatulent on New Ingestible Pill Can Track Your Farts In Real Time (arstechnica.com) · · Score: 4, Funny

    Yeah. I just don't get the value-add here. My wife has been detecting my farts in real time for YEARS now.

  10. Re:There are "legendary astronauts"... on John Young, Legendary Astronaut, Dies at Age 87 (cbsnews.com) · · Score: 1

    No, he was not one of the original Mercury 7, he was one of the next 9 in Astronaut Group 2, along with Neil Armstrong, Frank Borman, Jim Lovell, Ed White and others.

  11. There are "legendary astronauts"... on John Young, Legendary Astronaut, Dies at Age 87 (cbsnews.com) · · Score: 4, Interesting

    ...and then there's John Young.

    2 Gemini missions.
    2 Apollo missions.
    2 Shuttle missions.

    Gemini (manned) maiden flight.
    1st man to orbit the moon solo.
    One of the Twelve who have walked on the Moon.
    One of Three who holds the record for fastest humans have ever traveled, 39,897 kilometres per hour (24,791 mph)
    Chief Astronaut for 13 years.

    And then, the capper, the Shuttle maiden flight:
    STS-1: The first manned vehicle to be flown into orbit without previous unmanned orbital testing and the first winged manned vehicle to launch with solid rocket boosters. It was also the first winged reentry vehicle to return to a conventional runway landing.
    My favorite quote from him: "Anyone who sits on top of the largest hydrogen-oxygen fueled system in the world, knowing they're going to light the bottom, and doesn't get a little worried, does not fully understand the situation."
    I remember Crippen talking about landing STS-1: (IIRC) "..and John greased the landing like he always does, he was more excited than I've ever seen him, he said 'Let's finish this checklist and get out of here'." -- now that's laconic.

  12. Re:Check the entropy on White Noise Video on YouTube Hit By Five Copyright Claims (bbc.com) · · Score: 1

    Sorry, I've already copyrighted sine waves, middle C, and 3/4 time. Your fugue would infringe on my intellectual property.

  13. But but but on Google Blocks Pirate Search Results Prophylactically (torrentfreak.com) · · Score: 2

    I thought prophylactils were extinct.

  14. Re:Globalization is Great on Personal Data of a Billion Indians Sold Online For $8, Report Claims (theguardian.com) · · Score: 1

    No, I mean you have to explain every fucking thing,usually from first principles.

  15. Re:Globalization is Great on Personal Data of a Billion Indians Sold Online For $8, Report Claims (theguardian.com) · · Score: 1

    Unless, of course, you want to ship (more or less on time) a product that actually works, indeed, does anything at all besides print stack dumps. Meanwhile, you'll still be on the phone at 7:30 P.M. going "No, no, a hydrogen atom is one proton and one electron...".

  16. True. Citing papers is "doing science".

  17. Re:You Want Zombies? on A Federal Ban On Making Lethal Viruses Is Lifted (nytimes.com) · · Score: 2

    Not to worry, viruses NEVER mutate on their own, and containment and procedures will be foolproof and complete, as it will get as much (or more) funding as the research itself.

  18. Re:Meh on Star Wars: The Last Jedi Has Critics In Raptures (bbc.com) · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Looks like your parser failed. I said "Matrix" was a one-off. There weren't any sequels.

  19. Re:Meh on Star Wars: The Last Jedi Has Critics In Raptures (bbc.com) · · Score: 1

    What wasn't clear to you, Timmy?

  20. Re:Meh on Star Wars: The Last Jedi Has Critics In Raptures (bbc.com) · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Yeah. That was the solitary thing that made me say "mostly mediocre". But Empire Strikes Back only works as a follow-on.

  21. Meh on Star Wars: The Last Jedi Has Critics In Raptures (bbc.com) · · Score: 2, Insightful

    The first one, (A New Hope) was enjoyable enough at the time, klunky dialogue and all. But the efforts to turn it into a "franchise" have resulted in a series of mostly mediocre follow-ons, and the constant retconning has just been ridiculous. Like other mediocre franchises like "Highlander", or "Iron Man", Star Wars might be more fondly remembered had it been a one-off, like "The Matrix".

  22. Re:He who controls the geeks controls the future on AMD Is Open-Sourcing Their Official Vulkan Linux Driver (phoronix.com) · · Score: 1

    Oh, I think it is. In this era of GPU-driven machine learning, commitment == lockin. AMD is inviting people to play right down on the metal with this.

  23. Re:He who controls the geeks controls the future on AMD Is Open-Sourcing Their Official Vulkan Linux Driver (phoronix.com) · · Score: 4, Funny

    Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers!

    Where have I heard that before?

  24. Re:Faux-dramatic "reporting" makes me cringe. on Google's Machine Learning Is Analyzing Data From NASA's Kepler Space Telescope (nasa.gov) · · Score: 1

    Well, Johannes Kepler (from the 1500s) springs to mind...

  25. Re:Do you think they care? on Intel's ME May Be Massively Infringing on Minix3's Free Software License (ipwatchdog.com) · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Corporationsare people, too, my friend. Thieving, evil, soulless people.