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User: handybundler

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Comments · 475

  1. p00p on Apple Updates Professional Video Lineup · · Score: -1

    it's what's for dinner

  2. Compiling on NARA Goes Online · · Score: -1

    Compiling all of this took some time in order for it to make sense. I had been researching it for quite a while and was looking for the best possible way to set it all in to words. I am in to buttpainting, you see. One day I was at the supply store picking up some new colors and this guy walked by me in the acrylics aisle. I was immediately interested in establishing some sort of dialogue with him. I wondered immediately, as he glanced over at me as he walked by, just what it would take to get to pose for my next buttpainting. I've done works, to date, that rival that fat assed Monalisa and any thing that fucking freak Picasso ever did. And I've a bizarre talent that he may not understand. All the while, I digress. A few minutes had passed, I had my colors chosen and was heading for the front of the store. "Oh, you paint?" the person from the acrylic aisle asked. "Yes, yes I do." I replied, unsure if I wanted to blurt out in the store that I was a soon to be world renowned buttpainter. I mentioned that I had a studio a few blocks away in a loft. He sort of kicked at the ground and said that he had rescently lost his artisans workshop and was looking for a new space to use to allow his creative juices to flow. As soon as he said that, I knew I had a candidate for new buttpaninting. "my name is Pierre, Artiste, Esq." I said smoothly. "Oh, yes, I'm CmdrTaco! Nice to meet you." We shook hands. His hands felt sweaty. Hmmm. Was he a little uncomfortable? I kept the conversation going rapidly. "Yes, I am on my way to my studio now, if you'd like to come and check it out to see if you'd like to rent a portion of it, feel free to join me." Eagerly, CmdrTaco responded "yeah, that'd be great, just let me pay for my stuff." To my supprise, I looked at his soon to be purchase and realized that I had a potential fellow buttpaniter on my hands. Oh happy day!I looked at his hands, no signs of paint under his nails, hmmm. doesn't use his hands much to work the paint, does he?

    We walked and shot the shit (*buttpainting term) about art and some of the influences along teh way. I was shocked when this CmdrTaco told of a past time when he and friends used to lure young boys in from a "techie" website. A website that he created as a facade to a large homsexual young boy-lust ring of supposed geeks. "Screw some turds, buff some h4x0rz" (?) I think was the slogan. I was a bit shocked, but also realized that every artist has his method to his madness.

    We soon arrived at the studio. The place is a mess. Most of my work is on display through out the studio. My painting tools, a plathora of water bottles and hundreds of colors of assorted paints, litter the scene. CmdrTaco moved around began to inspect each and evry one of the paintings. He "hmmmpphh'd" and "uh-huh'd"his way around the place. All along being rather quiet, and not asking too many questions about the works. He wandered for about a half an hour and finally made it back to my location, my desk. Where I was tying up some business matters involving my next art showing. "I see you have a very special technique", he threw at me. "Special is definitely one way of putting it. So I take it you are familiar with the style?" I answered and requested of CmdrTaco. "Am I!?! Oh fucking hell yeah, I'm the biggest buttpainter fanatic since buttpainting was invented." He continued, "I originated Buttanime. I used to do whole story blocks for comic books and cartoons using this method!" I was amazed. I real live Buttanime artist. I was floored. I threw down some ass-splatters on some canvas before, but I was in the presence of CmdrTaco, Buttpainter/Buttanime Artist Extrordinaire.

    CmdrTaco went on to tell me that he was working on a new style of buttpainting that involved a high skill level and knowledge of computer code. He began to tell me that in hos old studio, the one that he just got asked to leave from, he was discovered to have this strange yet wonderful Buttpainting talent and the landlord wa

  3. Re: Brillo Boy on Operational Testing of Linux Kernel 2.5.x · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Brillo Boy

    I am a 24/7 male sex slave for Mistress Linda. She does not allow me to have sex with her. My main duties are to allow her to inflict pain on me. She allows me to masturbate only when she is present and she is sitting on my face.

    About a month ago, Mistress Linda was very mad with me, as I did not finish washing the dishes. She tied me up and really slapped and whipped my penis. She then got a brillo pad, lubricated my ass well, and inserted this wire thing up my ass. It was very painful.

    Next, she got this injector thing and some Tabasco sauce. She sucked up some of it into this injector, and then proceeded to inject it into the tip of my penis. It was the most painful thing, I begged her to stop. She just laughed and then used a penis pump on me.

    She then tried to pull out the brillo pad. But it was stuck.

    Linda took me to the hospital, where they removed it. They called the police. I did not press any charges and told them it was mutual. The doctors told us to be careful.

  4. Re:Operational Testing of First Posting Swat! on Operational Testing of Linux Kernel 2.5.x · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    I like to grab my balls until they turn blue. Then I swat them with a fly swatter. After that I put icy-hot on my balls and shaft and it gives them a hot burning sensation

  5. Mozilla, panties, and YOU!!! on Mozilla Project Turns 5 · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Special visitor

    Get to know a dirty old man. When your wife is out let him come in and fumble through her panties drawer, then select a pair, making sure it's a pair of her black nylon ones. Then watch him as he wanks into them making sure he comes into the gusset. Let him go on his way and dry off the panties, putting them back in the drawer. When she wears them, my cock gets so hard, it's better than Viagra.

    Laundry room

    I steal panties from the complex's laundry room. I usually pretend to do a load of laundry and sit there and watch the girl load the washer. As soon as she leaves, I open up the machine (hopefully before they get wet) and grab the first pair I can find. I usually return to my room, and jack off sucking the crotch of all her juices... then cum on the crotch. Sometimes I'll return them right back into the machine... this gets tricky, but it adds to the fun. Good luck... always bring a laundry bag in with you just in case.

    After a good run

    My sister goes running every morning. When she gets done she goes and takes a shower and she always leaves her dirty clothes on the floor. I go in after her and get naked. I pick up her stinky socks and put them on my face while breathing in deeply. The smell gags me but it always makes my dick so hard. With the sock still over my nose I pick up her dirty panties and lick the brown spot where they rode up her ass. It always gets me off.

    Red panties

    Red bloody panties are best. I find them in a friend's house, laundry basket, etc.. Two pairs work best, one on my face and the other wrapped around my cock. Guaranteed to make a man cum--hard.

    Found treasures

    I go into the ladies room at the place I work every day at least twice and check the baskets for dirty panties, used pads, and panty liners. When I get home and I sniff them, lick them, and rub my dick while laying on my stomach with a pile of old panties I stole until I come. Sometimes I buy tampons and insert them into my ass while masturbating.

    Sister's thong

    I like to take my sister's thongs and wear them around with nothing else except my jeans. When I first start looking for the thong I get a huge hard on and when I put on the thong I like the feel of it going up my ass. I wear them for about an hour or so until my dick isn't hard any more then I start to play around with it again feeling the silk on my cock. Then I go to my room and whack off. it feels great. After that, I go back to my sister's room and put them right back where they were. She doesn't know to this day.

    Mom's drawer

    I like to masturbate by first stealing a pair of panties from my mom's drawer. A nice silky pair too. Then I like to put the panties on with nothing else on except for a bra that I also stole and a black teddy and a pair of pantyhose. Once I have all that on I lie flat on my stomach and make my fist into a ball and press it against my hard cock. As I'm doing that I take a candy cane and push it into my ass really hard, then I pull it out and lick all the shit off. Once I blow my load in the panties I take them off and lick the warm hot cum off while rubbing some on my face.

    Stained panties

    Take a pair of you sisters of mothers underwear and get a dildo and stick the dildo up your ass and then lick the panties (but make sure the are used either stained with blood or something else) and then suck them as you whack off. It always works for me.

    I lick it all up

    I like to lay a pair of dirty wet panties on the carpet, the dirty side of the crotch facing up, then I lay down with the crotch just wide enough for my erect cock and rub up and down until I ejaculate. Then I lick it all up.

    It tastes great!

    When I jack off, I like to have a pair of my sister's panties that she already wore to smell and lick. It taste great!! I also like to get a pair of her leather sandals and hump them. I find it very erotic to lick my feet and suck my toes while i jack

  6. Apache is Dying! Let's look at this months numbers on Introduction to PHP5 · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Top Developers

    Developer | February 2003 | Percent | March 2003 | Percent |Change
    Apache | 22492327 | 62.72 | 244 | 86857 | 62.51 -0.21
    Microsoft | 9687454 | 27.01 | 1 | 0748795 | 27.44 0.43
    Zeus | 768951 | 2.14 | 794940 | 2.03 | -0.11
    SunONE | 428004 | 1.19 | 419120 | 1.07 | -0.12

  7. Apache is Dying! Let's look at this months numbers on Moneydance - Cross-Platform Personal Finance · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Top Developers

    Developer | February 2003 | Percent | March 2003 | Percent |Change
    Apache | 22492327 | 62.72 | 244 | 86857 | 62.51 -0.21
    Microsoft | 9687454 | 27.01 | 1 | 0748795 | 27.44 0.43
    Zeus | 768951 | 2.14 | 794940 | 2.03 | -0.11
    SunONE | 428004 | 1.19 | 419120 | 1.07 | -0.12

  8. Re:Linux GUIs are worsening on State of the E-nion · · Score: 1

    Yes. Still got the term winodws session icon in the 'ol tool bar. I am using KDE as of current, but if I had to take a guess at kdeinit is doing to my system resources, I'd say they wer getting hosed from from too much extra bloat. Chowing on 16.3 % system resource right now.

    Blackbox, to date, has been about the lightest desktop on resources with some good graphic appeal left to itd. And syetm weight being Enlightenments only major downfall IMO.

  9. Re:Linux GUIs are worsening on State of the E-nion · · Score: 1

    IAWTP

    Every since enlightenment was abandoned by Redhat as stock option, I have been eternally let down by all other window managers. KDE 3.0 run as extension (kicker) to Blackbox or FluxBox is the only thing that will compare to the days of E.

    RH would do themselves a large favor by backwards compat'ing some of the apps that a few of us have all come to know and love through years of usage. Each new OS that comes from RH has me more cropped at the knees than ever before. And Enlightenment was one of the first to go.

    KDE is klunky, gnome isn't half as hardcore as it used to be. Any Desktop that does not give you a term window icon/option at first boot is not worth running.

    Bring on E17.

  10. Re:Is this Monday? on Microsoft Bug May Attract Big Worm · · Score: 0

    I know this is was off topic for the article, but since you are *grub* I will ask you a quick question. here goes

    RH 8.0. Created grub password. Have not been prompted yet for it at any time. Downloaded 2.4.xx Athlon kernel. Will not upgrade. Failed three times. Would grub password have any thing to do with this?

    thanks.

  11. Re:Is this Monday? on Microsoft Bug May Attract Big Worm · · Score: 1, Informative

    Samba is not a standard part of any Linux distro that I know of.

    been in in every version of RH since 6.2 that I know of.

  12. INcorporate it into the logo on Benetton Clothing to Carry RFID Tags · · Score: 0

    If there is a concern about whether or not it would be comfortable to have the chip in the 'care tag' in the back, why not incorporate the chip in to the logo some how and place it some where on the shirt in some normal designer way to place logos on shirts?

  13. Busy? on The Tyranny of Email · · Score: 1, Insightful

    Gives people time to get back to you when they are able to, not when they have to. Allows time for an idea to be digested. At times making responses to ideas more favorable instead of needing a forced reply instantly over the phone or across the desk.

  14. I'm topping out at RH7.3 on Kernel 2.2 - It Lives! · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Current and the 2.4.18-26.7x .Athlon Kernel.

    Bought the boxed version of 8.0 and hatted it. So I re-installed 7.3 Professional and bought some RH annual service. Yep.

  15. break down the spamming practices on IETF to Look at Spam · · Score: 0

    Make the changes to what is wrong with the sytem that allows for things like Email parsing to occur, or random address creation, etc etc..

    Possibly, make those practices illegal, or more enforcable if they already are illegal.

    I'm still one for the 'beat-spammers-severly-about-the-head-and-face-are a' option myself, but that doesn't fly in todays non eye-for-an-eye society.

  16. Aside from printing crazy formulas and such on Can Science Journalism Be Entertaining and Responsible? · · Score: 3, Interesting

    'dumbing down' explanations of Science subjects tend to lose their lustre when the terms are replaced with common usage words.

    Any one else like the dire impact of pure scince placed in to science's words. It hurts my head to read it, but I must be learning some thing right?

  17. Re:rootkit my ass on Windows Rootkits · · Score: 0

    There is no question about whether or not they earned it.

    It's like the saying 'now that I have your attention, what should I do with it'

  18. Re:rootkit my ass on Windows Rootkits · · Score: 1, Insightful

    But the remaining 10% is obviously far more dangerous than 9/10 of the people who can't pass a firewall.

  19. WINE .dll issues? on Microsoft to End DLL Confusion · · Score: 0

    What will this do to WINE and it's dll running capabilities? Would a new version be in order and would it maintain this?

  20. dudes get over it on Jupiter's "Mini-Me" Solar System Grows · · Score: 0

    Jupiter was almost the second of a binary star system.

    So, yeah, it's going to have some fans that just wont let go.

  21. Re:First Hitler on Jupiter's "Mini-Me" Solar System Grows · · Score: -1

    hey, that's no subscriber-early-post!!!

    Teh Slasdort Police will be coming for you shortly.

  22. IDAWTP on Better Bandwidth Utilization · · Score: -1

    in the past, the numbers have clearly been 5678.

  23. Re:/. Math [OT] on Canadian Surgeons Perform Telerobotic Surgery · · Score: -1

    ....becasue +.7 Funny doesn't exist

  24. Re:As if it will help. on UK Spam Controlled by UK's Advertising Standards Agency · · Score: -1

    That's funny, most of the Spam I get is from overseas. A lot of .uk , some .de and numerous others.

    On and unrealted note:

    I heard that Rob Malda was going to start seeking prosecution of users for trolling and crapflooding slashdot.

  25. ATTENTION!!! on Microsoft Quits OpenGL ARB · · Score: -1

    Rob Malda to start seeking prosecution of users for trolling and crapflooding his site.