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User: wonkey_monkey

wonkey_monkey's activity in the archive.

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Comments · 8,419

  1. you just need a few thousand years to crack it.

    If I XOR some data with a key of unknown length, how are you going to verify that you've cracked it?

  2. Oh noes, where will I get my encryption from? on Internet Firms To Be Banned From Offering Unbreakable Encryption Under New UK Laws (telegraph.co.uk) · · Score: 1

    Internet Firms To Be Banned From Offering Unbreakable Encryption Under New UK Laws

    The reasons given are that they don't want the likes of terrorists and paedophiles to communicate in places the Police can't reach.

    Then in the great British tradition, they'll just Do It (Y)Themselves. It's not like "internet firms" - whatever that means - have a monopoly on mathematics.

  3. Can't be working that well, then on Virginia Radio Station Broadcasting Chinese Propaganda (reuters.com) · · Score: 4, Insightful

    An investigation by Reuters has uncovered a radio station located just outside Washington, D.C. that broadcasts dedicated Chinese propaganda to the U.S. capital and the surrounding area.

    If it takes an investigation by Reuters before anyone's even aware of your radio station, you're not doing a very good job.

  4. Hedging their bets on New Star Trek TV Series Coming In 2017 (hollywoodreporter.com) · · Score: 1

    In January, 2017, a new series will begin. The first episode will air on CBS, and subsequent episodes will appear on CBS's online platform

    Wow, that shows a lot of confidence, doesn't it?

    If it takes off, great - syndicate it and broadcast it. If not, well, it was just a web thing which we can pretend never happened when the next reboot comes along.

  5. Re:Not programming semantics, but the coder on Linus Rants About C Programming Semantics (iu.edu) · · Score: 4, Funny

    His reasoning: the compiler could have a bug and this way you would catch that bug.

    That's why all my variables are upper case and only use vowels. One day there might be a bug with lower case consonants, and then all you suckers will be laughing on the other side of your faces!

  6. He manages to play classic 3D Mario and Zelda

    There's no game called "3D Mario" or "Zelda" so they shouldn't be italicised.

    He plays Super Mario 64 and The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

  7. Err yes on Mother of All Apes May Have Been Surprisingly Small (sciencemag.org) · · Score: 4, Informative

    From sturdy chimpanzees to massive gorillas to humans themselves, the living great apes are all large-bodied, weighing between 30 and 180 kilograms.

    Err, yes, that's why they're called "great apes," isn't it?

    There are lesser apes as well, which are all gibbons.

    So for years most researchers thought the ancestral ape must have tipped the scales as well.

    I assume there's a bit more to the previous reasoning than that.

  8. Eh? on Leap Second May Be On the Chopping Block (ieee.org) · · Score: 2

    The days of 61-second minutes may be coming to an end

    Wait... are they getting rid of days, seconds, or minutes?

  9. Re:Google is going to shove YODA up your fucking a on Google Project Loon Balloons To Blanket Indonesia With Internet (thestar.com) · · Score: 1

    It's called: "Comment byte limit"

    So all I need to do
    to annoy people
    is split my comment up
    onto several lines
    so it still takes up
    a lot space
    without taking up
    a lot bytes.

    You'd think
    with Slashdot's
    amazing command
    of Javascript
    that they could implement
    a true line limit
    with a bit of DOM
    modification,
    if nothing else.

  10. Motorola Unveils Droid Turbo 2, Claims Shatterproof Display

    Yeah... I've heard that one before

  11. A blimp is a powered craft.

    Most sources I can find don't include being powered as a defining characteristic.

    An aerostat is a tethered balloon.

    That's what it was, but what is it now?

  12. Mmmm on Oracle Bakes Security Into New Chips (theregister.co.uk) · · Score: 1

    something bakes something something chips

    I skipped breakfast this morning.

  13. Good news! on British Engineers Create Sonic Tractor Beam (bbc.co.uk) · · Score: 1

    Now we don't need ants to sort tiny screws in space!

  14. Slashdot on Cassini Probe Will Dive Through Enceladus's Water Jets (nasa.gov) · · Score: 3, Insightful

    molecular hydrogen (H2)

    Okay, so you think Unicode is too hard. But why can't we even have <sub> and <super>?

    And yet we can have <code>...

  15. Re:Can anyone explain to me.... on The Popular Over-The-Counter Cold Medicine That Science Says Doesn't Work (forbes.com) · · Score: 1

    Because America, you commie pinko!

  16. Re:Or perhaps... on SXSW Cancels Panels On Harassment Due To Harassment (sxsw.com) · · Score: 1

    Or perhaps people are tired of the politically correct narrative, and this is their way of rebelling.

    What do you mean, "or"? Someone who is tired of the "politically correct narrative" (don't forget the little trick of replacing "political correctness" with "respect for others" and seeing if it still makes you angry) is still a massive dick if they issue threats of violence.

  17. Hang on... on The IRS Has Stingray Devices (theguardian.com) · · Score: 5, Interesting

    the use of stingray technology is not limited to intelligence agencies and law enforcement.

    there are currently between 2,000 and 3,000 "special agents" in the IRS who form the criminal investigation division (CID).

    Does that not count as law enforcement? I mean, yeah, it's tax, so it's not one of the cool crimes, but still.

  18. Re:Nothing on What Might a $50 Tablet Inspire? (arstechnica.com) · · Score: 1

    People who are unable to purchase a $100-$200 tablet

    What makes you think that people who can afford a $100-$200 tablet won't buy an Amazon Fire?

  19. Re:What is the spin angle of an absorbed photon? on Engineers Create the Blackest Material Yet (phys.org) · · Score: 1

    "Entangle" two photons, send one to be absorbed into this black material. Measure the others spin angle.... ooo look it still has a spin angle, yet the "entangled" photon no longer exists!

    So much for entanglement.

    What do you mean, "so much for entanglement?" Your thought experiment says nothing about it. Why would absorbing one entangled photon stop the other from having a spin? There's no such thing as a photon without spin.

    Ergo I've proved Einstein wrong, with my "spooky paint color transfer effect"....

    Have you ever considered the possibility that you're not smart enough to comprehend that there are things you don't comprehend?

  20. Re:Blacker than the previous blackest material eve on Engineers Create the Blackest Material Yet (phys.org) · · Score: 1

    It's blacker.

  21. You Can't Get Smarter, But You Can Slow How Fast You Get Dumber

    ...what?

  22. Re:Important distinction: Obervable vs watching... on 'Zeno Effect' Verified: Atoms Won't Move While You Watch (cornell.edu) · · Score: 3, Insightful

    The whole point of Schroedinger's cat is that the entire setup - radioactive element, poison phial, cat - can all be in a superposition until we open the box.

    In real life, of course, the surrounding environment interacts with the box in more ways than just light, all of which would collapse the wavefunction before we opened the box. But that's not the point of the thought experiment.

  23. Re:Important distinction: Obervable vs watching... on 'Zeno Effect' Verified: Atoms Won't Move While You Watch (cornell.edu) · · Score: 0

    We've only just recently discovered quantum effects play a role in the processing of information within the dendrites of the brain

    Have we really? Or is it another speculative idea that's been seized upon by quantum kooks?

  24. Re:Atoms are like deers in the headlights. on 'Zeno Effect' Verified: Atoms Won't Move While You Watch (cornell.edu) · · Score: 2

    I'll hold one still, then when I nod my head, you hit it with the hammer.

  25. It's nothing to do with "you" on 'Zeno Effect' Verified: Atoms Won't Move While You Watch (cornell.edu) · · Score: 4, Insightful

    One of the oddest predictions of quantum theory – that a system can't change while you're watching it

    Ah, stop right there.

    Before the quantum kooks crawl out of the woodwork, the atoms don't stop moving because "you" (click-bait headline alert) are watching. They "stop moving" because they are being continuously "measured" (interacted with in ways that stop them going all quantum-y) by lasers.

    A conscious observer is not required. And if you turn off the laser that's doing the measuring, peering through the window at the atoms with your actual peepers isn't going to stop them tunneling anywhere.