Trollercoaster could you explain, in 50 words or less what the suckiest thing about Linux is? I know its hard to choose just one, but I'd like to hear your opinion on the matter.
I have escaped from the vile "Love Dungeon" that Taco and Rob had imprisoned me. Although my backside now bears an uncanny resemblance the goatsex man, I'm glad to say that I'm alive. I was witness to numerous homosexual, bestial acts of the foulest nature one can imagine. Everytime I close my eyes I can still see Taco on his hands and knees, with a large Great Dane thrusting its red wang into his lips. *shudder*
Whilst imprisoned I was able to catch the briefest of glimpses of Jon Katz. Apparently Jon does not take part in the usual acts of sodomy that the rest of the Slashdot editors do. This would be because Jon weighs 500 pounds, and not even the desperate, love-stricken Slashdot editors find him attractive at all. Then again, at that weight the probably couldn't find his sphincter even if they wanted to.
Fellow trolls, please be aware that Taco loves nothing more than to parade around his mom's basement while wearing a black latez Nazi SS uniform. He keeps his arm greased up to the elbow and refers to himself as the "Tower of Power". Additionally, Timothy's anus is so loose that it was able to engulf Taco's fist like a python swallowing a guinea pig.
Finally, as I've previously mentioned no computers in the Slashdot compound actually run Linux. The bulk of them run various flavors of Windows, wiht a few lonely, neglected Macs throw in (the Slashdot webserver is actually an enfeebled Quadra 610.) When the leather penis-gag was removed from my mouth long enough to speak, I asked Taco about this. He replied by saying, "Haha! The readers are just fucking simps." before he stuffed a pair of panties previously worn by Kathryn Thurber into my mouth.
I finally escaped from the "Love Dungeon" that Rob and Taco had imprisoned me in. While there the most foul acts of sodomy one can imagine where forced upon me. Let me tell you that there is nothing on God's beautiful earth as disturbing as Taco, wearing only a feather boa and an East German gas mask prancing around you giggling, "It rubs the lotion all over its skin..." while thrusting his pus-ridden member deep into your backside.
Fortunately I am free. The details of my escape will await a future post.
However, I would like to take this opportunity to point out that while imprisoned, I observed that none of the PCs at the Slashdot compound actually ran Linux. The bulk of them ran Windows XP, with a few Macintoshes thrown in (the Slashdot webserver is an old Quadra 610.)
Yes, my fellow trolls, the time has come for me to take a leave of absence from the Slashdot trolling scene. Unfortunately I feel that my recent trolls have been a bit subpar and become rather commonplace. At this point I need to step back and explore new ways to troll Slashdot. I wish the best of luck in this new year to all my fellow trolls and crapflooders. I'll return before too long.
That damn troll's so old, it's starting to get gamey. And yet, it always reels in a few bites every time it is posted!!!
This is why I keep posting it. Its been by far my most successful troll yet, although the GPL-based one I wrote a few weeks ago is a close second. Perhaps I'll come up with a better one someday when I feel more inspired.
Not just because Linux is shitty on the desktop, but because all Linux has suceeded in doing is replacing other Unix boxes. Sun might fall to Linux, but not Microsoft.
I work as a consultant for several fortune 500 companies, and I think I can shed a little light on the climate of the open source community at the moment. I believe that part of the reason that open source based startups are failing left and right is not an issue of marketing as it's commonly believed but more of an issue of the underlying technology.
I know that that's a strong statement to make, but I have evidence to back it up! At one of the major corps(5000+ employees) that I consult for, we wanted to integrate Linux into our server pool. The allure of not having to pay any restrictive licensing fees was too great to ignore. I reccomended the installation of several boxes running the new 2.4.9 kernel, and my hopes were high that it would perform up to snuff with the Windows 2k boxes which were(and still are!) doing an AMAZING job at their respective tasks of serving HTTP requests, DNS, and fileserving.
I consider myself to be very technically inclined having programmed in VB for the last 8 years doing kernel level programming. I don't believe in C programming because contrary to popular belief, VB can go just as low level as C and the newest VB compiler generates code that's every bit as fast. I took it upon myself to configure the system from scratch and even used an optimised version of gcc 3.1 to increase the execution speed of the binaries. I integrated the 3 machines I had configured into the server pool, and I'd have to say the results were less than impressive... We all know that linux isn't even close to being ready for the desktop, but I had heard that it was supposed to perform decently as a "server" based operating system. The 3 machines all went into swap immediately, and it was obvious that they weren't going to be able to handle the load in this "enterprise" environment. After running for less than 24 hours, 2 of them had experienced kernel panics caused by Bind and Apache crashing! Granted, Apache is a volunteer based project written by weekend hackers in their spare time while Microsft's IIS has an actual professional full fledged development team devoted to it. Not to mention the fact that the Linux kernel itself lacks any support for any type of journaled filesystem, memory protection, SMP support, etc, but I thought that since Linux is based on such "old" technology that it would run with some level of stability. After several days of this type of behaviour, we decided to reinstall windows 2k on the boxes to make sure it wasn't a hardware problem that was causing things to go wrong. The machines instantly shaped up and were seamlessly reintegrated into the server pool with just one Win2K machine doing more work than all 3 of the Linux boxes.
Needless to say, I won't be reccomending Linux/FSF to anymore of my clients. I'm dissappointed that they won't be able to leverege the free cost of Linux to their advantage, but in this case I suppose the old adage stands true that, "you get what you pay for." I would have also liked to have access to the source code of the applications that we're running on our mission critical systems; however, from the looks of it, the Microsoft "shared source" program seems to offer all of the same freedoms as the GPL.
As things stand now, I can understand using Linux in academia to compile simple "Hello World" style programs and learn C programming, but I'm afraid that for anything more than a hobby OS, Windows 98/NT/2K are your only choices.
This is a desperate attempt at humor that failed miserably. I would like to see it modded down so other Slashdot readers won't wince when they view this.
Good job!! I hearby nominate The Turd Report for Troll of the Week. Who shall second me? And by seconding, I mean chopping off my head after I ritually disembowl myself. Which is the traditional troll way to nominate someone for Troll of the Week.
I just heard some sad news on talk radio - the WIPO troll was found dead in his home this morning over an apparent taco snot mishap. There weren't any more details. I'm sure everyone in the Slashdot community will miss him - even if you didn't browse at -1 or aren't a troll, there's no denying his contributions to Slashdot culture. Truly a trolling icon.
For those of us not in the know, what's the rocky history?
Basically Mosfet couldn't get off unless the other developers let him dress up in a black latex Nazi SS uniform and grease his arm up to the elbow. He would insist they call him the Tower of Power. It was quite silly, really.
I suspect this is because they love you, but can never have you. You are the editors forbidden love and they do not have the maturity to deal with it. So they react in anger, the only way they know how.
Although core10k may prefer to indulge in the unspeakable vice of the Greeks, I have to say that he is an outstanding hairdresser! If you're ever in San Francisco, I highly suggest visiting his salon on Castro street, "The Queen's Coifs". You won't regret it.
Be careful there, Mr. Turd Report! It sounds like your mighty sphincter can produce a lot of methane, a highly flamable gas. The Slashdot community would be a darker place if your joyful colon were to catch fire and you were unable to continue your much-needed work.
Capitalism is the foundation on which the American economy is built.
Uh oh! You're defending capitalism, which is to open source what garlic is to vampires. Expect numerous replies that quote Das Kapital as much as the GPL about the evils of capitalism. Nevermind that its much less evil than any other economic system! Here at Slashdot we expect everything to be free, which cannot exist under capitalism. Therefor, capitalism == bad.
Porn is always good at LAN parties. Nothing like a nice circle jerk after a heated match of Unreal Tournament (much better than Q3Gay.) Just don't forget to bring the slice of bread! God it pisses me off when someone forgets the slice of bread!
Did you use a 1/4 roll because no matter how much you wiped, your ass was still filthy? I had that happen to me last night. You know those joke candles that light back up after you blow them out? My ass felt like one of those because I'd wipe and yet there was just as much shit clinging to it as before I wiped.
Eventually I had to hire some Mexican day laborers to come help me out. It was a difficult job. Scaffolding was involved. But its clean now.
Just now, on the front page. Oh, you're looking for a review that at least has valid arguements to support its claims. Well, you won't find that on Slashdot.
Slashdot Mirror
Trollercoaster could you explain, in 50 words or less what the suckiest thing about Linux is? I know its hard to choose just one, but I'd like to hear your opinion on the matter.
Fellow Trolls:
I have escaped from the vile "Love Dungeon" that Taco and Rob had imprisoned me. Although my backside now bears an uncanny resemblance the goatsex man, I'm glad to say that I'm alive. I was witness to numerous homosexual, bestial acts of the foulest nature one can imagine. Everytime I close my eyes I can still see Taco on his hands and knees, with a large Great Dane thrusting its red wang into his lips. *shudder*
Whilst imprisoned I was able to catch the briefest of glimpses of Jon Katz. Apparently Jon does not take part in the usual acts of sodomy that the rest of the Slashdot editors do. This would be because Jon weighs 500 pounds, and not even the desperate, love-stricken Slashdot editors find him attractive at all. Then again, at that weight the probably couldn't find his sphincter even if they wanted to.
Fellow trolls, please be aware that Taco loves nothing more than to parade around his mom's basement while wearing a black latez Nazi SS uniform. He keeps his arm greased up to the elbow and refers to himself as the "Tower of Power". Additionally, Timothy's anus is so loose that it was able to engulf Taco's fist like a python swallowing a guinea pig.
Finally, as I've previously mentioned no computers in the Slashdot compound actually run Linux. The bulk of them run various flavors of Windows, wiht a few lonely, neglected Macs throw in (the Slashdot webserver is actually an enfeebled Quadra 610.) When the leather penis-gag was removed from my mouth long enough to speak, I asked Taco about this. He replied by saying, "Haha! The readers are just fucking simps." before he stuffed a pair of panties previously worn by Kathryn Thurber into my mouth.
I finally escaped from the "Love Dungeon" that Rob and Taco had imprisoned me in. While there the most foul acts of sodomy one can imagine where forced upon me. Let me tell you that there is nothing on God's beautiful earth as disturbing as Taco, wearing only a feather boa and an East German gas mask prancing around you giggling, "It rubs the lotion all over its skin..." while thrusting his pus-ridden member deep into your backside.
Fortunately I am free. The details of my escape will await a future post.
However, I would like to take this opportunity to point out that while imprisoned, I observed that none of the PCs at the Slashdot compound actually ran Linux. The bulk of them ran Windows XP, with a few Macintoshes thrown in (the Slashdot webserver is an old Quadra 610.)
Yes, my fellow trolls, the time has come for me to take a leave of absence from the Slashdot trolling scene. Unfortunately I feel that my recent trolls have been a bit subpar and become rather commonplace. At this point I need to step back and explore new ways to troll Slashdot. I wish the best of luck in this new year to all my fellow trolls and crapflooders. I'll return before too long.
Wow, I'm so flattered.
This is why I keep posting it. Its been by far my most successful troll yet, although the GPL-based one I wrote a few weeks ago is a close second. Perhaps I'll come up with a better one someday when I feel more inspired.
Not just because Linux is shitty on the desktop, but because all Linux has suceeded in doing is replacing other Unix boxes. Sun might fall to Linux, but not Microsoft.
I work as a consultant for several fortune 500 companies, and I think I can shed a little light on the climate of the open source community at the moment. I believe that part of the reason that open source based startups are failing left and right is not an issue of marketing as it's commonly believed but more of an issue of the underlying technology.
I know that that's a strong statement to make, but I have evidence to back it up! At one of the major corps(5000+ employees) that I consult for, we wanted to integrate Linux into our server pool. The allure of not having to pay any restrictive licensing fees was too great to ignore. I reccomended the installation of several boxes running the new 2.4.9 kernel, and my hopes were high that it would perform up to snuff with the Windows 2k boxes which were(and still are!) doing an AMAZING job at their respective tasks of serving HTTP requests, DNS, and fileserving.
I consider myself to be very technically inclined having programmed in VB for the last 8 years doing kernel level programming. I don't believe in C programming because contrary to popular belief, VB can go just as low level as C and the newest VB compiler generates code that's every bit as fast. I took it upon myself to configure the system from scratch and even used an optimised version of gcc 3.1 to increase the execution speed of the binaries. I integrated the 3 machines I had configured into the server pool, and I'd have to say the results were less than impressive... We all know that linux isn't even close to being ready for the desktop, but I had heard that it was supposed to perform decently as a "server" based operating system. The 3 machines all went into swap immediately, and it was obvious that they weren't going to be able to handle the load in this "enterprise" environment. After running for less than 24 hours, 2 of them had experienced kernel panics caused by Bind and Apache crashing! Granted, Apache is a volunteer based project written by weekend hackers in their spare time while Microsft's IIS has an actual professional full fledged development team devoted to it. Not to mention the fact that the Linux kernel itself lacks any support for any type of journaled filesystem, memory protection, SMP support, etc, but I thought that since Linux is based on such "old" technology that it would run with some level of stability. After several days of this type of behaviour, we decided to reinstall windows 2k on the boxes to make sure it wasn't a hardware problem that was causing things to go wrong. The machines instantly shaped up and were seamlessly reintegrated into the server pool with just one Win2K machine doing more work than all 3 of the Linux boxes.
Needless to say, I won't be reccomending Linux/FSF to anymore of my clients. I'm dissappointed that they won't be able to leverege the free cost of Linux to their advantage, but in this case I suppose the old adage stands true that, "you get what you pay for." I would have also liked to have access to the source code of the applications that we're running on our mission critical systems; however, from the looks of it, the Microsoft "shared source" program seems to offer all of the same freedoms as the GPL.
As things stand now, I can understand using Linux in academia to compile simple "Hello World" style programs and learn C programming, but I'm afraid that for anything more than a hobby OS, Windows 98/NT/2K are your only choices.
thank you.
No it doesn't.
This is a desperate attempt at humor that failed miserably. I would like to see it modded down so other Slashdot readers won't wince when they view this.
*slurp*slurp*slurp*
tastes like ham! mmmmmmm!
*slurp*slurp*slurp*
Good job!! I hearby nominate The Turd Report for Troll of the Week. Who shall second me? And by seconding, I mean chopping off my head after I ritually disembowl myself. Which is the traditional troll way to nominate someone for Troll of the Week.
Thank you.
I just heard some sad news on talk radio - the WIPO troll was found dead in his home this morning over an apparent taco snot mishap. There weren't any more details. I'm sure everyone in the Slashdot community will miss him - even if you didn't browse at -1 or aren't a troll, there's no denying his contributions to Slashdot culture. Truly a trolling icon.
Basically Mosfet couldn't get off unless the other developers let him dress up in a black latex Nazi SS uniform and grease his arm up to the elbow. He would insist they call him the Tower of Power. It was quite silly, really.
I think Ireland would have a lot more success if it made some changes that lead it away from alchohol dependance. *ba-dum-dum*
I suspect this is because they love you, but can never have you. You are the editors forbidden love and they do not have the maturity to deal with it. So they react in anger, the only way they know how.
Oh, come on. You know Michael loves you!
Although core10k may prefer to indulge in the unspeakable vice of the Greeks, I have to say that he is an outstanding hairdresser! If you're ever in San Francisco, I highly suggest visiting his salon on Castro street, "The Queen's Coifs". You won't regret it.
Be careful there, Mr. Turd Report! It sounds like your mighty sphincter can produce a lot of methane, a highly flamable gas. The Slashdot community would be a darker place if your joyful colon were to catch fire and you were unable to continue your much-needed work.
Uh oh! You're defending capitalism, which is to open source what garlic is to vampires. Expect numerous replies that quote Das Kapital as much as the GPL about the evils of capitalism. Nevermind that its much less evil than any other economic system! Here at Slashdot we expect everything to be free, which cannot exist under capitalism. Therefor, capitalism == bad.
Porn is always good at LAN parties. Nothing like a nice circle jerk after a heated match of Unreal Tournament (much better than Q3Gay.) Just don't forget to bring the slice of bread! God it pisses me off when someone forgets the slice of bread!
Did you use a 1/4 roll because no matter how much you wiped, your ass was still filthy? I had that happen to me last night. You know those joke candles that light back up after you blow them out? My ass felt like one of those because I'd wipe and yet there was just as much shit clinging to it as before I wiped.
Eventually I had to hire some Mexican day laborers to come help me out. It was a difficult job. Scaffolding was involved. But its clean now.
Just now, on the front page. Oh, you're looking for a review that at least has valid arguements to support its claims. Well, you won't find that on Slashdot.
Mine says "suX0r5"