2002. Slashdot publishes 1,000,000th rumor passed off as actual story. The story generates 480 comments, 263 of which agree with the article, and 107 of which point out its a rumor and are modded down as redundant. The remaining comments are all first posts.
2002. CmdrTaco married to Kathleen Fent. Many geeks believe Kathleen, a purported transvestite, outmeasures CmdrTaco.
2002. Slashdot parent corporation VA Research^W Linux^W Software stock worth 35 cents. Rumors that AOL, Microsoft, or even Jimmy the hobo who lives under the Longfellow Bridge may buy it.
2003. VA Software bought by Microsoft for a cup of coffee and a donut. All Microsoft-critical articles mysteriously disappear from Slashdot. Bill Gates as Borg logo replaced with Bill Gates as God.
2003. Papperatzi videos of Miguel de Icaza caught going down on Bill Gates in his private yacht spread across Usenet. Miguel swears that recent decisions to rename the Gnome desktop to Windows NT 6.0 have nothing to do with it.
2004. CmdrTaco loses virginity.
2004. The WIPO Troll returns again, showering Slashdot in 45,000 copies of the same post: Lick my crotch hairs. Slashdot, despite running on 18 redundant IIS/8.0 servers, buckles under the load. The term Slashdotted is replaced with WIPO-Trolled.
2004. Slashdot officially shut down. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Bill Gates.
2005. Linus Torvalds and Anal Cox found dead along with six penguins, an empty tub of crisco and several used condoms. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Steve Ballmer.
2005. CmdrTaco rumored to have had sex again.
2006. CowboiKneel found dead in hotel room with 56 pizza boxes covering his bloated corpse. Three suffocated gay prostitutes are extracted from beneath his body as police remove it with a backhoe.
2007. CmdrTaco actually has sex again. With a woman.
2007. BSD is still officially dying. No word on when its demise will take place.
2007. CmdrTaco starts new weblog to replace Slashdot, creatively named Dotslash. Remainder of Linux users flock to the site and immediate WIPO-Troll it out of existence.
2008. CmdrTaco has sex with his wife for the first time.
2009. After years of living under the heel of his domineering wife, and being deprived of the homosexual orgies of the past, CmdrTaco commits suicide. Another sweaty geek mob gathers and tears Kathleen Fent to shreds. Geeks discover Ms. Fent was indeed a woman, but dont exactly know what that means. Driven by their sexually-repressed rage, they subsequently invade Redmond again and lynch the current CEO of Microsoft, Miguel de Icaza.
2010. Microsoft is blamed for the assassination of Richard Stallman. Redmond invasions by geek hordes become commonplace.
2011. Microsoft campus burnt to the ground by screaming, unwashed geek mob after Microsoft is blamed when a Linux hacker in Cambridge, Massachusetts spills his coffee on his pants.
No, the first rule is, DON'T LET YOUR CHILDREN talk to PEDOPHILES LIKE ANAL COX. Or me, for that matter. Would you trust your children to touch this man's "kernel patches"?
Hah! Some HOMOSEXUAL MODERATOR with his COCK firmly planted up MICHAEL'S ASS will just mod your other comments down in PETTY VENGEANCE. Michael is probably giggling like a little girl BITCHSLAPPING your account as I write this.
2002. Slashdot publishes 1,000,000th rumor passed off as actual story. The story generates 480 comments, 263 of which agree with the article, and 107 of which point out it's a rumor and are modded down as redundant. The remaining comments are all "first posts."
2002. CmdrTaco married to Kathleen Fent. Many geeks believe Kathleen, a purported transvestite, outmeasures CmdrTaco.
2002. Slashdot parent corporation VA Research^W Linux^W Software stock worth 35 cents. Rumors that AOL, Microsoft, or even Jimmy the hobo who lives under the Longfellow Bridge may buy it.
2003. VA Software bought by Microsoft for a cup of coffee and a donut. All Microsoft-critical articles mysteriously disappear from Slashdot. Bill Gates as Borg logo replaced with Bill Gates as God.
2003. Papperatzi videos of Miguel de Icaza caught going down on Bill Gates in his private yacht spread across Usenet. Miguel swears that recent decisions to rename the Gnome desktop to "Windows NT 6.0" have nothing to do with it.
2004. CmdrTaco loses virginity.
2004. The WIPO Troll returns again, showering Slashdot in 45,000 copies of the same post: "Lick my crotch hairs." Slashdot, despite running on 18 redundant IIS/8.0 servers, buckles under the load. The term "Slashdotted" is replaced with "WIPO-Trolled."
2004. Slashdot officially shut down. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Bill Gates.
2005. Linus Torvalds and Anal Cox found dead along with six penguins, an empty tub of crisco and several used condoms. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Steve Ballmer.
2005. CmdrTaco rumored to have had sex again.
2006. CowboiKneel found dead in hotel room with 56 pizza boxes covering his bloated corpse. Three suffocated gay prostitutes are extracted from beneath his body as police remove it with a backhoe.
2007. CmdrTaco actually has sex again. With a woman.
2007. BSD is still officially "dying." No word on when its demise will take place.
2007. CmdrTaco starts new weblog to replace Slashdot, creatively named Dotslash. Remainder of Linux users flock to the site and immediate WIPO-Troll it out of existence.
2008. CmdrTaco has sex with his wife for the first time.
2009. After years of living under the heel of his domineering wife, and being deprived of the homosexual orgies of the past, CmdrTaco commits suicide. Another sweaty geek mob gathers and tears Kathleen Fent to shreds. Geeks discover Ms. Fent was indeed a woman, but don't exactly know what that means. Driven by their sexually-repressed rage, they subsequently invade Redmond again and lynch the current CEO of Microsoft, Miguel de Icaza.
2010. Microsoft is blamed for the assassination of Richard Stallman. Redmond invasions by geek hordes become commonplace.
2011. Microsoft campus burnt to the ground by screaming, unwashed geek mob after Microsoft is blamed when a Linux hacker in Cambridge, Massachusetts spills his coffee on his pants.
Yes, a choice. A choice between something that looks like SLOP, something that looks like VOMIT, something that looks like DRIED VOMIT, something else that looks like SLOP, and something that looks like FRESH, MAGGOT-INFESTED DOGSHIT.
2002. Slashdot publishes 1,000,000th rumor passed off as actual story. The story generates 480 comments, 263 of which agree with the article, and 107 of which point out it's a rumor and are modded down as redundant. The remaining comments are all "first posts."
2002. CmdrTaco married to Kathleen Fent. Many geeks believe Kathleen, a purported transvestite, outmeasures CmdrTaco.
2002. Slashdot parent corporation VA Research^W Linux^W Software stock worth 35 cents. Rumors that AOL, Microsoft, or even Jimmy the hobo who lives under the Longfellow Bridge may buy it.
2003. VA Software bought by Microsoft for a cup of coffee and a donut. All Microsoft-critical articles mysteriously disappear from Slashdot. Bill Gates as Borg logo replaced with Bill Gates as God.
2003. Papperatzi videos of Miguel de Icaza caught going down on Bill Gates in his private yacht spread across Usenet. Miguel swears that recent decisions to rename the Gnome desktop to "Windows NT 6.0" have nothing to do with it.
2004. CmdrTaco loses virginity.
2004. The WIPO Troll returns again, showering Slashdot in 45,000 copies of the same post: "Lick my crotch hairs." Slashdot, despite running on 18 redundant IIS/8.0 servers, buckles under the load. The term "Slashdotted" is replaced with "WIPO-Trolled."
2004. Slashdot officially shut down. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Bill Gates.
2005. Linus Torvalds and Anal Cox found dead along with six penguins, an empty tub of crisco and several used condoms. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Steve Ballmer.
2005. CmdrTaco rumored to have had sex again.
2006. CowboiKneel found dead in hotel room with 56 pizza boxes covering his bloated corpse. Three suffocated gay prostitutes are extracted from beneath his body as police remove it with a backhoe.
2007. CmdrTaco actually has sex again. With a woman.
2007. BSD is still officially "dying." No word on when its demise will take place.
2007. CmdrTaco starts new weblog to replace Slashdot, creatively named Dotslash. Remainder of Linux users flock to the site and immediate WIPO-Troll it out of existence.
2008. CmdrTaco has sex with his wife for the first time.
2009. After years of living under the heel of his domineering wife, and being deprived of the homosexual orgies of the past, CmdrTaco commits suicide. Another sweaty geek mob gathers and tears Kathleen Fent to shreds. Geeks discover Ms. Fent was indeed a woman, but don't exactly know what that means. Driven by their sexually-repressed rage, they subsequently invade Redmond again and lynch the current CEO of Microsoft, Miguel de Icaza.
2010. Microsoft is blamed for the assassination of Richard Stallman. Redmond invasions by geek hordes become commonplace.
2011. Microsoft campus burnt to the ground by screaming, unwashed geek mob after Microsoft is blamed when a Linux hacker in Cambridge, Massachusetts spills his coffee on his pants.
2002. Slashdot publishes 1,000,000th rumor passed off as actual story. The story generates 480 comments, 263 of which agree with the article, and 107 of which point out it's a rumor and are modded down as redundant. The remaining comments are all "first posts."
2002. CmdrTaco married to Kathleen Fent. Many geeks believe Kathleen, a purported transvestite, outmeasures CmdrTaco.
2002. Slashdot parent corporation VA Research^W Linux^W Software stock worth 35 cents. Rumors that AOL, Microsoft, or even Jimmy the hobo who lives under the Longfellow Bridge may buy it.
2003. VA Software bought by Microsoft for a cup of coffee and a donut. All Microsoft-critical articles mysteriously disappear from Slashdot. Bill Gates as Borg logo replaced with Bill Gates as God.
2003. Papperatzi videos of Miguel de Icaza caught going down on Bill Gates in his private yacht spread across Usenet. Miguel swears that recent decisions to rename the Gnome desktop to "Windows NT 6.0" have nothing to do with it.
2004. CmdrTaco loses virginity.
2004. The WIPO Troll returns again, showering Slashdot in 45,000 copies of the same post: "Lick my crotch hairs." Slashdot, despite running on 18 redundant IIS/8.0 servers, buckles under the load. The term "Slashdotted" is replaced with "WIPO-Trolled."
2004. Slashdot officially shut down. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Bill Gates.
2005. Linus Torvalds and Anal Cox found dead along with six penguins, an empty tub of crisco and several used condoms. Millions of screaming, unwashed geeks invade Redmond campus and lynch Steve Ballmer.
2005. CmdrTaco rumored to have had sex again.
2006. CowboiKneel found dead in hotel room with 56 pizza boxes covering his bloated corpse. Three suffocated gay prostitutes are extracted from beneath his body as police remove it with a backhoe.
2007. CmdrTaco actually has sex again. With a woman.
2007. BSD is still officially "dying." No word on when its demise will take place.
2007. CmdrTaco starts new weblog to replace Slashdot, creatively named Dotslash. Remainder of Linux users flock to the site and immediate WIPO-Troll it out of existence.
2008. CmdrTaco has sex with his wife for the first time.
2009. After years of living under the heel of his domineering wife, and being deprived of the homosexual orgies of the past, CmdrTaco commits suicide. Another sweaty geek mob gathers and tears Kathleen Fent to shreds. Geeks discover Ms. Fent was indeed a woman, but don't exactly know what that means. Driven by their sexually-repressed rage, they subsequently invade Redmond again and lynch the current CEO of Microsoft, Miguel de Icaza.
2010. Microsoft is blamed for the assassination of Richard Stallman. Redmond invasions by geek hordes become commonplace.
2011. Microsoft campus burnt to the ground by screaming, unwashed geek mob after Microsoft is blamed when a Linux hacker in Cambridge, Massachusetts spills his coffee on his pants.
The signal/noise ratio on Slashdot is almost as bad as it is in the alt.* groups in Usenet nowadays! Good work, my fellow trolls! Drown them in our spam!!
Slashdot Mirror
I want an address like 10724.457.21976.2398745.28064.23180745.23754124! Much better than 195.64.0.1! Isn't it?
Only if you make your children fondle THIS MAN'S "-ac branch."
Would YOU trust THIS MAN around your children?
No, the first rule is, DON'T LET YOUR CHILDREN talk to PEDOPHILES LIKE ANAL COX. Or me, for that matter. Would you trust your children to touch this man's "kernel patches"?
It's all J'raxis's fault! Wait, I'm J'raxis. Right!? Hah.
Can we BOMB THIS SHITHOLE AND BE DONE WITH IT like we bomb everyone else? I mean, c'mon!! Fucking French!!
Hah! Some HOMOSEXUAL MODERATOR with his COCK firmly planted up MICHAEL'S ASS will just mod your other comments down in PETTY VENGEANCE. Michael is probably giggling like a little girl BITCHSLAPPING your account as I write this.
Wait, wait, wait. Second amendment? I thought the SECOND AMENDMENT was the one that gave us the right to SHOOT THESE FUCKERS ON SIGHT.
Is this the same Hollings that SUCKS MICKEY MOUSE DICK???
Why are there more conspiracy theories surrounding WIPO Troll than the JFK Assassination?
No, instead we should SHOVE EVERY FORK UP YOUR ASS until you scream for your momma!
No es troll, la palabra es ogro!
VIVA EL OGRO!
Well, I'm right, aren't I? Name a NON-SLOP Linux desktop.
.
.
.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
Yes, a choice. A choice between something that looks like SLOP, something that looks like VOMIT, something that looks like DRIED VOMIT, something else that looks like SLOP, and something that looks like FRESH, MAGGOT-INFESTED DOGSHIT.
Complete pile of SLOP. Nothing more. Next!
Yes, sir!
Uuuuuuuuuunnnnggggh...
There's six!
Uuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnngggghhhh...
And seven!!
Uuuugghhh-- Aaah!!!!!!!!
Eight... Uhh...
Uuuggh... Aaaah!!! Aaaaiiee dear GODD!!!
Nine....
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Oh my God I look like Goatse.cx!!!
TEN!!!
Huh?
I now have it in me, about FIVE INCHES, as a matter of fact. What should I do next? It sort of hurts and makes me feel like I need to pee!
Scientologists are more evil than pedophiles.
RANDY Bush? I thought his name was PRETZEL-CHOKING DICKSLURP.
The signal/noise ratio on Slashdot is almost as bad as it is in the alt.* groups in Usenet nowadays! Good work, my fellow trolls! Drown them in our spam!!
I find you offensive. Let's censor you. And bring on the kiddie porn!!