YOU DO IT WRONG!! Go back to Afghanistan and tell him that Your Mission to destroy the Troll/Crapflooder Alliance has failed! You lose! Rip off your own nutsack and eat it for the jellylike flavor!
Note to editors: Putting a sock over your cock before you sodomize your boyfriend does not equal "Digital Muppets running Linux," Maybe if it's a red sock, and you glue some plastic eyes on then it counts.
I'm sorry to say that you're asking the wrong people. Unfortunately, none of Slashteam has ever ejaculated anywhere near a woman, unless you count the time that Jamie's landlady caught him at the moment of truth during an unannounced visit. Perhaps asking the sex gods over at your favorite website and mine might help.
I don't know about you, but when i was a kid, I used to sharpen my popsticle sticks on the driveway until they were sharp and dangerous. Then I'd shank kids on my block.
Now that I'm in prison, it seems that I'm in the same situation. Some things never change..
Now that the Spider-Man movie is coming to theaters, I'd like to take a moment to clarify a few of the myths that have surrounded the Spider-Man universe for the past few years. Specifically, I'd like to address the origin of pop-culture catchphrase "the Spider-Man boner," as in, "Weezer gives me a Spider-Man boner!," "Sorry, I can't go out tonight, I have a Spider-Man boner!," or, "That is like, so, Spider-Man boner."
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
What are you talking about? They tried to buy SEGA and SEGA refused. After dumping the Dreamcast, they have become a profitable company. They are bigger than EA/Square and stand to make a killing developing for multiple consoles.
BTW, WinCE was only included in the Dreamcast to encourage porting PC games. Internet Explorer is nowhere to be found on the Dreamcast (PlanetWeb made the DC browser in the US).
Who do you think would win in an all-out chess throndown between Grandmaster Flash and Funkmaster Flex? Whoever won, you can bet they'd tear the roof off the sucka'.
Now that the Spider-Man movie is coming to theaters, I'd like to take a moment to clarify a few of the myths that have surrounded the Spider-Man universe for the past few years. Specifically, I'd like to address the origin of pop-culture catchphrase "the Spider-Man boner," as in, "Weezer gives me a Spider-Man boner!," "Sorry, I can't go out tonight, I have a Spider-Man boner!," or, "That is like, so, Spider-Man boner."
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
Re:Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me
on
Touchscreen Watch
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· Score: -1
Rocky Horror sucks ass till it bleeds purple. See it when you're not in a roomful of theater fags and/or stoned and you'll agree.
Slashdot Mirror
YOU DO IT WRONG!! Go back to Afghanistan and tell him that Your Mission to destroy the Troll/Crapflooder Alliance has failed! You lose! Rip off your own nutsack and eat it for the jellylike flavor!
Recockulus!
I've been at warfare with the Bong for many yearz. I light it on fire, and it sputters and smokes, but it never gives up. When shall I Suck-ceed?
PS Plz provide linkz to muppet pr0n now THX!
I second the "fuck ACs" sentiment. By the way, can anyone provide some good links to Muppet Pr0n? TIA PLZ THX!
don't sue me for libel!
I'm sorry to say that you're asking the wrong people. Unfortunately, none of Slashteam has ever ejaculated anywhere near a woman, unless you count the time that Jamie's landlady caught him at the moment of truth during an unannounced visit. Perhaps asking the sex gods over at your favorite website and mine might help.
Now that I'm in prison, it seems that I'm in the same situation. Some things never change..
Why should I care? Anyway, if I need to buy my groceries I'll rip your fingers off and use 'em.
All-ice is friggin' frozen! knowwhuti'msayin?
You know what you're doing! Funny little dried up bastard!
Do you remember that million-dollar freeplicious wrestler the Million Dollar Man? He was awesome. He had the Million Dollar Belt!
Eat a dick, you cockloving hippie!
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
Magic Mushrooms...Dude that is so rad! Let's eat some cool shit like Captain D's. I like the hush puppies best!
Could you provide a mirror to that dead zombie-man taking a piss? THX!!!!
It was one of those fucking Final Fantasy games about grabbing the crystals and saving the world, for sure...
You are too much for eggs! You go to prison!
BTW, WinCE was only included in the Dreamcast to encourage porting PC games. Internet Explorer is nowhere to be found on the Dreamcast (PlanetWeb made the DC browser in the US).
I love that song. Too bad Cat Stevens flipped out and became a shitting Muslim. The Yo La Tengo version ain't bad neither.
Why are you turnin' black?
Who do you think would win in an all-out chess throndown between Grandmaster Flash and Funkmaster Flex? Whoever won, you can bet they'd tear the roof off the sucka'.
Stay away from the scotch and soda, ya hump!
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
Rocky Horror sucks ass till it bleeds purple. See it when you're not in a roomful of theater fags and/or stoned and you'll agree.