Now that the Spider-Man movie is coming to theaters, I'd like to take a moment to clarify a few of the myths that have surrounded the Spider-Man universe for the past few years. Specifically, I'd like to address the origin of pop-culture catchphrase "the Spider-Man boner," as in, "Weezer gives me a Spider-Man boner!," "Sorry, I can't go out tonight, I have a Spider-Man boner!," or, "That is like, so, Spider-Man boner."
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
Have you ever thought about making a P0rn K1ng tshirt? It just says "First Post!" on the front and then "Get it in you!" on the back (with pr0n k1ng written in a smaller font underneath)? You should do it! Or at least make a www.goatse.cx shirt.
Now that the Spider-Man movie is coming to theaters, I'd like to take a moment to clarify a few of the myths that have surrounded the Spider-Man universe for the past few years. Specifically, I'd like to address the origin of pop-culture catchphrase "the Spider-Man boner," as in, "Weezer gives me a Spider-Man boner!," "Sorry, I can't go out tonight, I have a Spider-Man boner!," or, "That is like, so, Spider-Man boner."
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
Ask slashdot: deploying Linux in a business environment?
Posted by Hemos on Monday April 22, @11:48PM
from the justifying-my-unhealthy-fixation dept.
An Anonymous Coward writes "I have a job where I'm real important and I get to take care of 2 NT servers, a bunch of workstations, and an AIX box that runs our database. My boss aksed me about the possibility of upgrading the other day. I told him that we should go with Linux because it's free, and you can write scripts and stuff. Also Ihave it running on all my 386 boxen at home. Has anyone ever used Linux in a business environment before?Update: Slashdot appears fourth when you type in 'Linux' on google.
I agree! Games do have a political agenda. Here are a few examples:
Crazy Taxi: Drive as dangerously as you want, risking your life and the lives of your passengers, as long as you make money! I read this as a defense of unfettered capitalism.
Super Mario Bros: Eat lots of mushrooms, flowers, and stars all while stepping on turtles and lizards. This is clearly a cautionary tale about man taking from the environment but not giving back.
Dungeons and Dragons: You're always digging through X dungeon to get Y item. This is materialism brought to a disgustingly fetishistic level.
In short, video games are the most political force since Uncle Tom's Cabin.
if it'll enlarge NASA's badger, it's good. ever since the cold war I have been impotent. almost anything that will help is worth considering. i know i'm willing to pay for sex!
You see, there's the other Operating Systems. (that are not Linux). As strange as it may sound, these other operating systems, they have coherent desktops, with applications that can INTERACT. Some of these operating systems even allow you to get work done WITHOUT USING THE COMMAND LINE!
Slashdot Mirror
HAHAHAHA!
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
Have you ever thought about making a P0rn K1ng tshirt? It just says "First Post!" on the front and then "Get it in you!" on the back (with pr0n k1ng written in a smaller font underneath)? You should do it! Or at least make a www.goatse.cx shirt.
Myth:In Amazing Spider-Man #1 Peter Parker, or Spider-Man, coins the phrase "With great power comes great responibility," in reference to his super-powers and crimefighting.
Spider-Man feels that his super-powers give him a greater civic responsibility than the rest of us, and because of this, he fights crime.
Fact: Spider-Man actually said, "With great power, comes...Oh good god! I'm so fucking hard right now!"
Being bitten by a radioactive spider didn't just give Peter Parker amazing spider-powers. Nope, it also kinked his brain in a very unique way: crimefighting became an aphrodisiac to him.
Myth: Spider-Man's costume was designed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals.
Admittedly, many people are afraid of spiders, but the blue and red tones don't exactly strike fear.
Fact: Spider-Man's costume was designed to downplay the bulges in his crotchocological region.
Notice the busy black "webbing" pattern that steers the eyes to the middle of the chest, and the gentle color sloping that brings the eyes down towards the boots without emphasizing the crotch. This is because Spidey's chronic ( and often painful) priapism is linked to his career as a costumed do-gooder. He doesn't want anyone to see his perpetual crime-fighting inspired erection, but there it is, poking out underneath his tights despite his greatest efforts. And thus, the expression "Spider-Man" boner was born.
Myth: Spider-Man has sexual intercourse with his enemies.
So, you see Spidey happily webslinging from building to building, just after trapping Doctor Octopus and saving the city. You see the erection, and perhaps even an unfortunate stain, and you think, "He and Doc Ock probably had some rough sex just like Michael Douglas!"
Fact:Spider-Man is faithful to his wife.
Besides some drunken, clumsy rooftop sex between he and Felicia Hardy (aka the Black Cat) after an office party in 1999, Spidey has always remained faithful to Mary Jane, his bride. While fighting crime remains an incredibly arousing experience for the wall-crawler, his outward expressions of lust remain limited to his marriage partner. Mary Jane herself has no problem with this-"As long as New York has muggers, we'll never need Viagra!" she quipped in a recent interview with Vogue.
When you go to see the Spider-Man feature, remember that Spidey isn't completely altruistic-he does get quite a charge out of it. And if you ever get a chance to see him, be sure to tell him, "Great job fighting crime!" and let him know that you don't mind that he has a big boner-it's all part of God's plan.
You bring a lot to the table. You are a heavy-hitting troll free agent.
1)Call ex-girlfriend and make cat noises 2)Hang up quick.
1)Cut through shielding on power supply wires.
2)Place tongue on wires
3)Plug in power supply.
That should fix your problem.
Don't forget to forget Final Fantasy VIII. God what a piece of shit game that was!
Here's my try:
1)Take magical journey of the imagination using "books."
2)Wonder where pants went.
from the justifying-my-unhealthy-fixation dept.
An Anonymous Coward writes "I have a job where I'm real important and I get to take care of 2 NT servers, a bunch of workstations, and an AIX box that runs our database. My boss aksed me about the possibility of upgrading the other day. I told him that we should go with Linux because it's free, and you can write scripts and stuff. Also Ihave it running on all my 386 boxen at home. Has anyone ever used Linux in a business environment before? Update: Slashdot appears fourth when you type in 'Linux' on google.
You have dared to DISSENT? Face the wrath of UNJUST MODERATION!!!
Look for these in 2002!
Your sig link rocks a cheetah's ass!
Brush your breath clean-with my peen!
- Crazy Taxi: Drive as dangerously as you want, risking your life and the lives of your passengers, as long as you make money! I read this as a defense of unfettered capitalism.
- Super Mario Bros: Eat lots of mushrooms, flowers, and stars all while stepping on turtles and lizards. This is clearly a cautionary tale about man taking from the environment but not giving back.
- Dungeons and Dragons: You're always digging through X dungeon to get Y item. This is materialism brought to a disgustingly fetishistic level.
In short, video games are the most political force since Uncle Tom's Cabin.Gorp? Good 'Ol Raisins and Peanuts? TASTY!
Workin on the sex farm
tryin' to raise some hard crops!
gettin' out my pitchfork
pokin' your hay!
Sorry, this first post (along with your anal cherry) has been claimed by the Community of Logged In Trolls. Propz to all dead homies!
if it'll enlarge NASA's badger, it's good. ever since the cold war I have been impotent. almost anything that will help is worth considering. i know i'm willing to pay for sex!
IAgreeWithThisPost.
I know you won't believe me, so I've provided a link and here's another.
But...where is the tentacle rape?
Holy shit! After learning from your conjecture that Micro$haft 0wnz 10%, I am so mad I'mm ready to burn down my Best Buy! Let's kill some people!
now that's Customer Service!!! I'll be shopping here from now on!
For more interesting crapfloodtastic words, please check my bio. THX LOL!