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User: Chocolate+Teapot

Chocolate+Teapot's activity in the archive.

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  1. That's easy on Second Hand Hard Discs Reveal Secrets · · Score: 5, Funny
    What's the strangest thing readers have found, or left, on a hard drive?
    Windows '95
  2. Call me a Luddite but.., on Garmin Palm Device With GPS · · Score: 4, Funny
    You know, I used to look at devices like this and think 'Wow! That's pretty cool!' But then I stopped to think what possible use I might have for one of these things. Let's examine the functionality.

    Mapping Software. You have to travel pretty extensively to require a pocket atlas. Most 'normal' people can take a quick look at a map before they leave and maybe scribble a couple of notes on a PostIt. If I have an appointment, it is not unusual for someone to email me a local map in advance.

    GPS. GPS! For God's sake! When was the last time you got so lost that you needed friggin' GPS to pinpoint your location to the nearest ten feet. If you are that bad at navigating, you should not be let out alone. Does it come with distress flares and a survival kit?

    Voice recorder for making memos, quick notes, and messages on the fly. Just in case the GPS let's you down, you can leave a message for your loved ones - assuming anybody finds your cold, lifeless body.

    Rechargeable internal Lithium-ion battery. If you are so goddam far from civilisation that you need GPS to safe your sorry hide, where are you gonna plug it in?

    Built-in 32 MB of memory for downloading map data and other Palm OS-compatible software. At this point I would prefer a means of lighting a fire and perhaps obtaining fresh food and water. A raft would be useful. I suppose you would die secure in the knowledge that your Palm Pilot was fully up-to-date.

    New ARM processor enhances battery life, screen redraw, graphics, and audio. Can it skin a rabbit or fend off hungry crocodiles?.

    For the sake of argument, let's assume that you are the kind of person who needs 80% of the above features in order to manage your hectic schedule. You must be a pretty busy guy huh? Probably one of the high-flying, go-get-em entrepreneurs who can never afford to miss an appointment or be in the wrong place at the wrong time. In which case, where the fuck do you find the time to play games and listen to MP3s?

    This is a toy for pencil dicks who can't afford a Ferrari.

  3. Many a true word spoken in jest on IFPI Employee Describes P2P Sabotage Activities · · Score: 1

    Something about this story rang some bells in what is left of my mind, and I did a bit of digging. Here's another one.

  4. Bastards too! on IFPI Employee Describes P2P Sabotage Activities · · Score: 1

    damn

  5. The basterds! on IFPI Employee Describes P2P Sabotage Activities · · Score: 4, Funny
    Matt Warne, an employee of the international version of the RIAA, admitted that he helped the organization spread garbage and random noise on the P2P networks
    He shared his Brittney Spears mp3s.
  6. Great idea! on Mobile Phone Abuse and AbUsers · · Score: 1

    If the antenna doubles as a Tazer, it could be triggered by anyone with remote car door opener. Reminds of The Simpsons episode where the whole family submitted each other to electric shocks during group therapy.

  7. Shooting themselves in the foot on The End of the Free PCI Device List (Update) · · Score: 1

    I just did a search for 'yourvote' at the PCI-SIG site, and it turned up nothing but positive comments from members of the SIG. P.S. I would have checked the link, but it appears that the SOBs have since been slashdotted.

  8. Call that secure? on Linux Top Gun Hacker Contest Report · · Score: 1

    I could gain root access any one of those in a few seconds with a can opener. All I ask is the opportunity to prove it.

  9. Overall impression? on Linux Top Gun Hacker Contest Report · · Score: 5, Funny
    On the upside, the DJ had a good stream of music, there were more women than you'd expect, and some in small metal bras
    So all-in-all, the evening was a resounding success then?
  10. Re:Then again... on Decrypting the Secret to Strong Security · · Score: 1

    He used it correctly. The article states "A secret that cannot be readily changed should be regarded as a vulnerability." This assumes the truth of an unproven statement. It begs the question. Just because many people these days misuse the expression, do not assume that every time someone uses it they are incorrect. Perhaps you should read his comment again.

  11. Re:Secrecy DOES equal Security on Decrypting the Secret to Strong Security · · Score: 1

    Dear Madam. Bwuahahahahaaaa! Love CT

  12. Re:He's right, you know on Decrypting the Secret to Strong Security · · Score: 2, Funny

    Every seen how much steak it takes to bribe a Rottweiler? It's gonna cost you an arm and a leg ;)

  13. He's right, you know on Decrypting the Secret to Strong Security · · Score: 5, Funny
    The secret to strong security: less reliance on secrets
    I have a couple of rottweilers and make no secret of it. Wanna try some social engineering on them?
  14. Doofus! on Hacker's Delight · · Score: 1

    Left shift multiplies by a power of two - it doesn't round anything.

  15. Redundant and proud of it on Hacker's Delight · · Score: 2, Interesting
    In principal, I like the sound of this book. However, I have a shelf full of so-called 'secrets of the masters' books, each weighing in at around half a ton, containing 800 pages all stating the obvious. I look forward to hearing comments from those who have actually bought the thing.
    If you want a better understanding of the hardware on which your code runs, or you need to squeeze clock cycles, or you just enjoy seeing clever tricks, this is an excellent book. If you primarily use high-level languages such as VB, perl, python, etc., this may not be the right book for you.
    Time for me to state the obvious... I have worked on many applications that run uneccessarily slowly as a result of an accumulation of inefficient code. Sure, it is often better to sacrifice raw performance for portability, maintainabilty and plain readability, but code does not need to be obcure to be efficient. Optimisers take much of the hard work out of achieving this, but taking the time to examine compiler output once in a while will help you write high-level code in such a way as to give the optimiser room to strut it's stuff. If anything, there is often more to be gained by programs written in high-level languages (VB, perl, python, etc) if the coder takes time to examine the structure of his code and attempts to eliminate bottlenecks. Inefficiency is not a function of the development tools, it's a function of laziness.
  16. Very considerate of them on World's Longest Wi-Fi Connection · · Score: 1

    Now the drive-by hackers don't need to leave their own driveway.

  17. Re:Linux good for you health! on Linux-Based Bar-Monkey · · Score: 1

    Aaaaargh! Don't be surprised if the M$ lawyers come knocking on /.'s door demanding that they remove your posting on the grounds that it links to M$ copyrighted material. Failing that, it should be removed in the interests of common decency :)

  18. I want one on Linux-Based Bar-Monkey · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does it require a designated driver?

  19. Re:This Seems... on Urban Exploration Walkware · · Score: 1

    Just think what the moderators might have awarded if you hadn't used that sig

  20. Re:Oh I'm on a roll today! (And still off-topic) on Inside Symantec's 'Security Center' · · Score: 1

    Guess what? I don't believe you. Check it again - you owe me a cigar ;)

  21. Oh I'm on a roll today! (And still off-topic) on Inside Symantec's 'Security Center' · · Score: 5, Interesting

    "Symatec Corporation" Is an anagram of "motto: conspiracy near"

  22. You missed! on AMI Introduces 'Trusted Computing' BIOS · · Score: 1

    Dunno. I'm English.

  23. Government Certified Idiots on Mandated Regulation/Certification for Computer Repair? · · Score: 1

    You could take it a stage further and make it a legal requirement to take your computer along to you local Goverment regulated repair monkey for annual 'safety' inspections. FBI == Fixed By Idiots

  24. Re:And how long before... on AMI Introduces 'Trusted Computing' BIOS · · Score: 0

    "Windows not found. Swipe any credit card to continue"

  25. Hah! on AMI Introduces 'Trusted Computing' BIOS · · Score: 1

    mandating arse creme