Obvious slogan: All the reliability you have come to expect from Microsoft, with all the safety features of a Ford. I can't wait until these hit the road, so I can quit driving altogether.
Eventually, Gates said, there could be a car that wouldn't let itself crash.
Will I have to pay yearly license fees to drive my car, or will it just one day swerve off the road if I let my licenses lapse? Can they catch a virus from neighboring cars at the parking lot? Will it come with Clippy? "Hello! you seem to be flying off the roadaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh" (car flies off road, rolls, and catches on fire).
Must resist urge to make bluescreenofdeath jokes.....
Forcing people to have up-to-date virus/firewall software before they can even connect to the network would be a good start. Turning network connectivity off for offending computers/users for progressively longer spans of time after they infect the network seems like a good deterrent as well. I suppose posting the names of people who infect the network and bring it down might work, though the screams from the public beatings might make it hard for you to sleep at night.
As long as the people who sign up for this realize the limitations of email there isn't a problem, but I would bet good money that the average Joe thinks that email is as reliable as, say, 911 emergency service (which in some cases isn't that reliable, but that is another topic).
My favorite behaviour is when someone forwards me a message marked as spam by our filter that shouldn't be marked as such. They always leave the [SPAM] in the subject, so of course the message always gets stuffed into MY spam folder where it sits until I decide to go clear it out. The solution to this of course was to create a mail alias (notspam) that doesn't get filtered for them to forward the email to, but of course no one ever uses it.
...e-mailed emergency alerts, which provide a heads-up on hurricanes, tornados, and other weather events...
I think this sums up the problem right here; are these people relying on email to keep them updated on potentially life-threatening situations? Don't get me wrong, these messages shouldn't be marked as spam, but depending solely on these email warnings is seriously asking for trouble, considering how many different things can delay these messages or even cause them to disappear completely. Email wasn't designed to be a bulletproof message delivery system.
Assuming one user per download there have been more than enough for every man, woman and child in the US, Japan, UK, and Madagascar to have a copy, which would point to exactly 345,188,666 actual unique users (+/- 200,000,000 unique users).
I swear I would rather chop off my left hand then program in Tcl ever again. But I won't hold your love of Tcl against you:-) My favorite behaviour when using Tcl was seeing a syntax error in code that had been running in production for years. Since Tcl isn't preprocessed god only knew how many syntax errors where in that code. Granted the programmer should have written test cases to exercise all of the code, but that is a whole other ball of stupidity.
First of all a trademark search shows something like three other companies who have just the word "Tiger" trademarked in the first page alone (with 1759 records total with tiger somewhere in the name). Second, why did they take so long to bring this up? Certainly Apple has some version of Mac OS Tiger trademarked, isn't it past the time to complain already? The real reason seems to be:
At the root of the issue appears to internet search results. Tiger Direct contends that Apple's use of the name has adversely affected its ranking amongst the Internet's largest search engines....
So does that mean they plan on taking on some non-profit who appears above them on google, because hey everyone knows I might get confused while searching for "tiger" instead of "tigerdirect" (which shows them ranked first btw). This whole things stinks of a "get rich quick by settlement" scam.
It would probably be cheaper for companys to include a disposable pre-paid cellphone for 911 calls. But once GPS units are cheaper that might solve the price issue at least.
They can just include a little card for subscribers to carry around in their wallet that says, "In case of emergency, shout 'Someone call 911' until help arrives".
Now that his first group of fans has grown up, there is a whole new area of filmmaking that he hasn't explored yet: Star Wars porn. I mean who wouldn't pay good money to see a wookie getting it on with a bunch of ewoks?
What a great job to have at Microsoft, listening to people cursing after their machine crashes. "AAuuuuggh not again! Stupid $#*!@ Microsoft employees!!! I will kill you all!!!!" followed by the sound of a gun being loaded, doors slamming, and faintly in the distance car tires squealing.
What is her site domain? Maybe I could point some of the zombies and such who keep poking around my domains with a redirect to her website so SHE can go track them down.....
Does anything like this exist already? It would be nice if I could filter, say, ssh traffic coming from "known" naughty sites, and report sites that portscan me, though probably I should look at using smartcards or something more secure at this point. I can't just restrict the ssh port at the firewall, since people could be coming in from pretty much anywhere because of travel to remote sites. Aside from complaining to upstream providers (which so far has yielded zero responses) when I see people banging away at ssh, I don't see much else I can do.
Rather than tear it down, I thought they had simply changed it slightly to look like a huge hand giving the bird to the rest of the world. Then again, we do need more copper for creating pennies, so how ironic would it be if it got melted down to make pennies (remember, kids around the US donated pennies to build the pedestal).
Maybe you could sell cheaper versions that suck data off of a real working version. Even better, a version that allows you to override the real data; simply plot in the route you are taking and this automatically gets fed to all your cheap knockoffs as the slowest route for everyone else so that you can get where you are going quicker.
What I want is a website that sneaks GPS units onto police cars so we can find out where all the best donut shops are. At least then when I am sitting in traffic I have a dozen artery-clogging donuts to keep me busy.
Remember these are busy politicians. A simple one page graphic of a plane exploding, people on fire, politicians getting blamed, etc. might have better conveyed the message, since apparently the headline "Bin Ladin Determined to Strike in US" didn't instill the proper amount of concern.
Slashdot Mirror
Obvious slogan: All the reliability you have come to expect from Microsoft, with all the safety features of a Ford. I can't wait until these hit the road, so I can quit driving altogether.
Yep, just sit back and watch that karma burn as twenty people post the same jokes that we all are thinking.
Will I have to pay yearly license fees to drive my car, or will it just one day swerve off the road if I let my licenses lapse? Can they catch a virus from neighboring cars at the parking lot? Will it come with Clippy? "Hello! you seem to be flying off the roadaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh" (car flies off road, rolls, and catches on fire).
Must resist urge to make bluescreenofdeath jokes.....
Forcing people to have up-to-date virus/firewall software before they can even connect to the network would be a good start. Turning network connectivity off for offending computers/users for progressively longer spans of time after they infect the network seems like a good deterrent as well. I suppose posting the names of people who infect the network and bring it down might work, though the screams from the public beatings might make it hard for you to sleep at night.
As long as the people who sign up for this realize the limitations of email there isn't a problem, but I would bet good money that the average Joe thinks that email is as reliable as, say, 911 emergency service (which in some cases isn't that reliable, but that is another topic).
My favorite behaviour is when someone forwards me a message marked as spam by our filter that shouldn't be marked as such. They always leave the [SPAM] in the subject, so of course the message always gets stuffed into MY spam folder where it sits until I decide to go clear it out. The solution to this of course was to create a mail alias (notspam) that doesn't get filtered for them to forward the email to, but of course no one ever uses it.
I think this sums up the problem right here; are these people relying on email to keep them updated on potentially life-threatening situations? Don't get me wrong, these messages shouldn't be marked as spam, but depending solely on these email warnings is seriously asking for trouble, considering how many different things can delay these messages or even cause them to disappear completely. Email wasn't designed to be a bulletproof message delivery system.
Assuming one user per download there have been more than enough for every man, woman and child in the US, Japan, UK, and Madagascar to have a copy, which would point to exactly 345,188,666 actual unique users (+/- 200,000,000 unique users).
I swear I would rather chop off my left hand then program in Tcl ever again. But I won't hold your love of Tcl against you :-) My favorite behaviour when using Tcl was seeing a syntax error in code that had been running in production for years. Since Tcl isn't preprocessed god only knew how many syntax errors where in that code. Granted the programmer should have written test cases to exercise all of the code, but that is a whole other ball of stupidity.
At the root of the issue appears to internet search results. Tiger Direct contends that Apple's use of the name has adversely affected its ranking amongst the Internet's largest search engines....
So does that mean they plan on taking on some non-profit who appears above them on google, because hey everyone knows I might get confused while searching for "tiger" instead of "tigerdirect" (which shows them ranked first btw). This whole things stinks of a "get rich quick by settlement" scam.
Which leads us to the LISP catch phrase: "Easier to use than assembler".
It would probably be cheaper for companys to include a disposable pre-paid cellphone for 911 calls. But once GPS units are cheaper that might solve the price issue at least.
They can just include a little card for subscribers to carry around in their wallet that says, "In case of emergency, shout 'Someone call 911' until help arrives".
So do they remove R2D2's thrusters that allow him to fly around too?
But I bet it is April 1 in some universe somewhere. I wonder if a grain or two of salt increases throughput or causes more transmission errors?
See? This idea is solid gold from a marketing perspective. I bet you can't get the whole wookie/ewok thing out of your head for the rest of the day!
Now that his first group of fans has grown up, there is a whole new area of filmmaking that he hasn't explored yet: Star Wars porn. I mean who wouldn't pay good money to see a wookie getting it on with a bunch of ewoks?
What a great job to have at Microsoft, listening to people cursing after their machine crashes. "AAuuuuggh not again! Stupid $#*!@ Microsoft employees!!! I will kill you all!!!!" followed by the sound of a gun being loaded, doors slamming, and faintly in the distance car tires squealing.
What is her site domain? Maybe I could point some of the zombies and such who keep poking around my domains with a redirect to her website so SHE can go track them down.....
Does anything like this exist already? It would be nice if I could filter, say, ssh traffic coming from "known" naughty sites, and report sites that portscan me, though probably I should look at using smartcards or something more secure at this point. I can't just restrict the ssh port at the firewall, since people could be coming in from pretty much anywhere because of travel to remote sites. Aside from complaining to upstream providers (which so far has yielded zero responses) when I see people banging away at ssh, I don't see much else I can do.
Rather than tear it down, I thought they had simply changed it slightly to look like a huge hand giving the bird to the rest of the world. Then again, we do need more copper for creating pennies, so how ironic would it be if it got melted down to make pennies (remember, kids around the US donated pennies to build the pedestal).
I thought the interweb made the world a smaller place? Pretty soon people will be able to jump across the Atlantic.
Maybe you could sell cheaper versions that suck data off of a real working version. Even better, a version that allows you to override the real data; simply plot in the route you are taking and this automatically gets fed to all your cheap knockoffs as the slowest route for everyone else so that you can get where you are going quicker.
What I want is a website that sneaks GPS units onto police cars so we can find out where all the best donut shops are. At least then when I am sitting in traffic I have a dozen artery-clogging donuts to keep me busy.
Remember these are busy politicians. A simple one page graphic of a plane exploding, people on fire, politicians getting blamed, etc. might have better conveyed the message, since apparently the headline "Bin Ladin Determined to Strike in US" didn't instill the proper amount of concern.