Pah! Last week CSI did that thing they do every week where they zoom in on a security camera tape so much they could see the suspect in the reflection in somebodys eye.
So: Integrate that technology into Google...? Profit!
Another example of a wonderful joke that they have left out. (Well, I don;t know that they left this one out, but since they left out "not bloody Martin Smith from Croyden", I figure they left this one out, especially since it only works if Zaphod has an obvious second head)
Unfortunately, neither does Zaphod in the next movie, most of the time.
I think that is the strangest bit about the new film; with all the CGI stuff that can be done today, why doesn't Zaphod visibly have three arms and two heads throughout the movie?
Yes, but there was one thing consistant across the radio, book, and TV. They were full of DNA's jokes. Our fear of the new movie is that it is full of broken DNA jokes.
Doom, because it was the first one that didn't suck. Duke Nukem 3D, becuase it had humour. Quake, because it was real 3D. HL, because it had an immersive storyline. Counterstrike because no AI in the world delivers like human opponents do
(I loved plenty more FPSes, currently playing a mixture of day of Defeat and Serious Sam for example, but these are the ones that took the genre to a new level)
Now, here I see three different threads.
In the iD corner, make the graphics incredible. OK, that will go on apace, as hardware increases. Moores law, etc. HL2, Doom 3, etc. We all know that Q4 will have a moronic storyline but will make us all wet ourselves with it's beauty.
In the mod corner, make the online play work. This will always have a strong candidate, often unexpected, because the art of this is almost luck - getting that thing called "balance" right.
The final thread, then, is plotting.
For this, I think the next inventive approach might be to try and copy that other sucess story in the 3D arena, GTA.
Could someone make a FPS that is genuinely freeform? Where you wander about, discovering interesting things. Maybe there are loose missions, that lead you to a goal.
Yes, yes, we all knew they would cut stuff out. We were prepared for stuff to be cut out. Every version has had stuff cut out (and new stuff put in). I'd even managed to get my head around Stephen Moore not being in the cast.
But I wasn't prepared for them to leave so much out. Just look at that list!
(Practically) No Prosser? No Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters? No proof of the non-existance of God? No vogon Guard? No conversation between Arthur and Marvin on the surface of Magarathea? No explanation of what Magarathea is apart from a throwaway line from Slartibartfast? No Joo Janta 200 Peril-Sensitive Sunglasses? No Vroomfondel and Majikthise?
Hollywood certainly does this; it buys propeties and then ignores everything about them. I, Robot, is the canonical example. (The scene where Mr Smith actually pisses on Mr Asimov's grave will be in the directors cut, they felt that the theatrical cut didn't need to belabour the point)
I think what dissapoints me most about this though is that everyone made such a point of "it'll be faithful to the original".
A look at the "what they left out" page reveals that it clearly has not. Adams was not really a great plotter - as others have pointed out, dialogue and monologue are his forte - but he had seen photographs of what a plot looks like; the mkaers of this film clearly have not.
Well, you know, Warren Ellis once worked out exactly how to do a new Star Trek. He writes about it in the preface to Switchblade Honey. Good book, you should buy it.
Good news, we SA's have had a discussion and we have decided to give you special permission to sell enough product so we can afford to hire a personal engineer just to look after your machine.
Call us when you've pushed enough product into the channel.
I seem to be quoting the bard a lot on slashdot today, so let's get it over with:
'Tis but thy name that is my enemy.
Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
What's Montague? it is nor hand, nor foot,
Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
Belonging to a man. O, be some other name!
What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet.
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes
Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name;
And for that name, which is no part of thee,
Take all myself.
but seriously, isn't this cheating? I mean, the fun in trying to grow a blue rose is that it is so hard as to probably be impossible.
and because I really am a geek, I will point out that "geek" is in fact much older than the carnival act; as with so many words and phrases we consider modern, Shakespear used it. Which makes it 348 years older than "nerd", so I win!
MALVOLIO. Lady, you have. Pray you peruse that letter: You must not now deny it is your hand, Write from it, if you can, in hand or phrase; Or say 'tis not your seal, not your invention: You can say none of this. Well, grant it then, And tell me, in the modesty of honour, Why you have given me such clear lights of favour; Bade me come smiling and cross-garter'd to you; To put on yellow stockings, and to frown Upon Sir Toby and the lighter people: And, acting this in an obedient hope, Why have you suffer'd me to be imprison'd, Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest, And made the most notorious geck and gull That e'er invention played on? tell me why.
Well, the way I see it, "nerd" is derived from a nonsense word coined by Dr Seuss, whereas "geek" is of course derived from a deeply distrubing carnival act.
So to me, nerd is well loved and cute, while geek is... how can I put it... "edgy". (Sorry Wil!)
Slashdot Mirror
Enable drawings in posts and it'll be a stream of badly drawn pictures of knobs, you know it.
As someone who tries to use his mod points carefully, and so "Browses at -1 to keep an eye out for abuses.", I don't know if I could face it!
Pah! Last week CSI did that thing they do every week where they zoom in on a security camera tape so much they could see the suspect in the reflection in somebodys eye.
...?
So:
Integrate that technology into Google
Profit!
Another example of a wonderful joke that they have left out. (Well, I don;t know that they left this one out, but since they left out "not bloody Martin Smith from Croyden", I figure they left this one out, especially since it only works if Zaphod has an obvious second head)
Thank you for inadvertently agreeing with me.
Ah, but if a tree falls in the forest when no-one is there, does it make a sound?
I found the satellite photos of Area 51 on google interesting. Not as secret as the buildings nect to the white hous, obviously.
Unfortunately, neither does Zaphod in the next movie, most of the time.
I think that is the strangest bit about the new film; with all the CGI stuff that can be done today, why doesn't Zaphod visibly have three arms and two heads throughout the movie?
Yes, but there was one thing consistant across the radio, book, and TV. They were full of DNA's jokes. Our fear of the new movie is that it is full of broken DNA jokes.
I agree. Look at the significant FPSs. For me:
Doom, because it was the first one that didn't suck.
Duke Nukem 3D, becuase it had humour.
Quake, because it was real 3D.
HL, because it had an immersive storyline.
Counterstrike because no AI in the world delivers like human opponents do
(I loved plenty more FPSes, currently playing a mixture of day of Defeat and Serious Sam for example, but these are the ones that took the genre to a new level)
Now, here I see three different threads.
In the iD corner, make the graphics incredible. OK, that will go on apace, as hardware increases. Moores law, etc. HL2, Doom 3, etc. We all know that Q4 will have a moronic storyline but will make us all wet ourselves with it's beauty.
In the mod corner, make the online play work. This will always have a strong candidate, often unexpected, because the art of this is almost luck - getting that thing called "balance" right.
The final thread, then, is plotting.
For this, I think the next inventive approach might be to try and copy that other sucess story in the 3D arena, GTA.
Could someone make a FPS that is genuinely freeform? Where you wander about, discovering interesting things. Maybe there are loose missions, that lead you to a goal.
And cinnamon. Everything is better with cinnamon.
You know what's really scary? When you fall asleep and find yourself playing the game in your dreams!
I've done that with Tetris, Bejewelled, Doom and Counter-Strike, so obviously a mark of quality.
It's General Grievous.
(You might want to consider getting your Star Wars news from a slightly better source than a lego catalogue.)
I had no problem with Queens being elected. It's just a title. Our elected leader in the UK is called the "First Lord of the Treasury", after all.
I had a problem witha political process that elects a teeneager to supreme executive power.
Yes, yes, we all knew they would cut stuff out. We were prepared for stuff to be cut out. Every version has had stuff cut out (and new stuff put in). I'd even managed to get my head around Stephen Moore not being in the cast.
But I wasn't prepared for them to leave so much out. Just look at that list!
(Practically) No Prosser? No Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters? No proof of the non-existance of God? No vogon Guard? No conversation between Arthur and Marvin on the surface of Magarathea? No explanation of what Magarathea is apart from a throwaway line from Slartibartfast? No Joo Janta 200 Peril-Sensitive Sunglasses? No Vroomfondel and Majikthise?
No towels? No towels. NO TOWELS!
This film doesn't know where it's towel is.
Hollywood certainly does this; it buys propeties and then ignores everything about them. I, Robot, is the canonical example. (The scene where Mr Smith actually pisses on Mr Asimov's grave will be in the directors cut, they felt that the theatrical cut didn't need to belabour the point)
I think what dissapoints me most about this though is that everyone made such a point of "it'll be faithful to the original".
A look at the "what they left out" page reveals that it clearly has not. Adams was not really a great plotter - as others have pointed out, dialogue and monologue are his forte - but he had seen photographs of what a plot looks like; the mkaers of this film clearly have not.
Well, you know, Warren Ellis once worked out exactly how to do a new Star Trek. He writes about it in the preface to Switchblade Honey. Good book, you should buy it.
Well, Mandriver Linux sounds like it'll suck something off....
At least you can enjoy Duke Nukem Forever on your console while you wait....
Also, of course, nothing to stop them extracting a few pints of sperm/eggs before injecting you with the super-serum and freezing them for later.
I imagine women might even be able to give birth again after the treatment is over, via IVF.
Good news, we SA's have had a discussion and we have decided to give you special permission to sell enough product so we can afford to hire a personal engineer just to look after your machine.
Call us when you've pushed enough product into the channel.
but seriously, isn't this cheating? I mean, the fun in trying to grow a blue rose is that it is so hard as to probably be impossible.
Well, the way I see it, "nerd" is derived from a nonsense word coined by Dr Seuss, whereas "geek" is of course derived from a deeply distrubing carnival act.
... how can I put it ... "edgy". (Sorry Wil!)
So to me, nerd is well loved and cute, while geek is
So I'm a geek.
PHB: Dear god, that server is actually red hot!
SA: Yes, but notice that the room is lovely and cool.
PHB: That's all right then. By the way, what's delaying that upgrade to Windows 2003?
SA: Every time we put the CD in the drive it melts. We think it's going to be fixed in the next service pack.
Yeah, they're nerds, and we're geeks. There's a difference ya know!
Don't they say Gauss was the last man to be able to hold pretty much all of Mathematics in his head? After that, it got too much.
You're definitely not new here, aren't you?