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User: FatdogHaiku

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Comments · 2,419

  1. Re:Technology is hard and dangerous on Toyota's Killer Firmware · · Score: 4, Funny

    Why the need to push and pull everything to the extreme that they can pushed or pulled to?

    It's kind of the unofficial /. posters motto:
    Ad absurdum, Ad infinitum, Ad nauseam!
    Add Vodka...

  2. Re:Only one more step left... on Dell Is Now a Private Company Again · · Score: 1

    Bringing the call centres back to Britain? :p

    If anything he would move them to Texas to avoid future hassle when Texas declares itself a Republic again...

  3. Re:WTF on Japan Refused To Help NSA Tap Asia's Internet · · Score: 1

    You mean the constitution was drawn up under the Allied occupation that followed World War II? How strange that a people defeated and then forced into democracy by The Potsdam Declaration would turn out to be better defenders of civil liberties than the role model that externally imposed democracy in the first place.

  4. Re:Wikipedia is an MMO on Wikipedia Actively Battling PR Sockpuppets · · Score: 1, Offtopic

    That's funny. When I went to the Wikipedia page about Wikipedia it said it was "The happiest place on Earth." Clearly these PR companies aren't having an impact on Wikipedia.

    Wikipedia is pubic hair adjacent?
    Disneyland made the same bogus claim in July of 1955... some judge should have at least forced them to put appropriate landscaping around the front entrance...

  5. Re:10M students? on Teachers Get 1 Week To Test Tech Giants' Hour of Code · · Score: 1

    The high school lesson plan doesn't even have to exist in order for some tech giants to score some political points.

    So, it's really "CS Education Weak"?

  6. Re:Whew! on Tiny Pacemaker Can Be Installed Via Catheter · · Score: 1

    I thought that science had finally proven that the path to a man's heart isn't through his stomach once and for all... :(

    Yes, that was an old wives tale started to deny and suppress the "Happy Penis, Happy Man" axiom...
    Old Wives be bitches sometimes...

  7. Re:Deep down.. on Ask Slashdot: Why Isn't There More Public Outrage About NSA Revelations? · · Score: 4, Funny

    Russian operatives were far more successful, some escaping detection for multiple decades.

    Interesting use of the past tense there, comrade...

  8. Re:Net Zero on Team Austria Wins the 2013 Solar Decathlon With Their Net-Zero LISI House · · Score: 1

    ...You want good for the environment then move back in with your parents.

    You haven't been around my Dad after burrito night...

  9. Re:Why does positive thinking work? on Gene Variant Can Cause Nattering Nabobs of Negativity · · Score: 2

    I always liked this quote of George Bernard Shaw:
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world: the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man."

  10. Re:Apple must be responsible for this somehow! on Foxconn Accused of Forcing InternsTo Build PS4s Or Lose School Credit · · Score: 4, Funny

    I have to agree. There is a finite amount of time they are forced to do that particular task and then they move on in life. It kind of messes up my business plan to stand in the parking lot selling "I was a slave at Foxconn and all I got was this stupid tee shirt" shirts to graduating interns...
    "I was an indentured servant at Foxconn and all I got was this stupid tee shirt" just does not have the same humorous impact.

  11. Re:Why? on Samsung Creates Phone With Curved Display · · Score: 4, Funny

    It curves around your moobs.

    Once they are big enough you can just tuck the phone under one of them...

    Won't putting it under your boob prevent the signal from getting through?

    Fat does not interfere with cellular frequencies... if it did there would be zero cell reception in places like board rooms, banks, and most importantly... Congress...

  12. Re:hmmm... on In Room With No Cell Service, Verizon Works On Future of Mobile · · Score: 1

    that "...small, windowless room high up in a San Francisco office building (that) gets no service at all." sure has one hell of a view according to the pic in TFA.

    it get's even more interesting when the ground starts moving...

  13. Re: Hooray for fusion! on Two-Laser Boron Fusion Lights the Way To Radiation-Free Energy · · Score: 4, Funny

    No. It has nothing to do with heavy medium half-life isotopes.

    They prefer to be called "somewhat big boned semi-long lived isotopes", you insensitive clod!

  14. Re:Why? on Samsung Creates Phone With Curved Display · · Score: 3, Funny

    It curves around your moobs.

    Once they are big enough you can just tuck the phone under one of them... those that consider themselves more fashion conscious may want to get a spacer for the other moob so there is no "out of balance" or "left turn signal" look. Also note that using a vibrate setting while doing this may cause inappropriate giggling...

  15. Many of them have law degrees, so you have to think more on the asexual reproductive level... like black mold...

  16. Yes, you should spray water from a bottle to correct pets... they will then go chew up or pee on your shoes...

    Oh, I have IT! Hows this for remediation: If a company loses a class action suit, the board and officers that were serving at the time of the issue have to take a paint ball on the naked ass from each class member. Hell, they don't even need paint in them as long as the mass and velocity is the same, it's all good. Oh, we would want RFID on each projectile so that cash awards could be handed out for any "Hole In One" shots.

  17. Re:Why? on AMD Intentionally Added Artificial Limitations To Their HDMI Adapters · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Hey, I'm not wild about it either, but in the ass hat run off AMD has pulled out in front... Intel I am kind of liking at the moment, but I'm sure they will do something to change that opinion. Same with Nvidia. It's kind of like having a dog. You have to expect them to act like a dog... short term interests almost always dominate their behavior. Something smells good in the trash, they get into the trash. The thing is that our purchasing power is the only real "rolled up newspaper" that we have when it comes to corporations crapping on the rug that is our beloved tech...

  18. Re:Why? on AMD Intentionally Added Artificial Limitations To Their HDMI Adapters · · Score: 3, Funny

    Off with their heads!

    Since they weren't using them anyway, I don't think removing their heads would change anything... It you want to lop off something they will respond to, it should be their bottom line that gets axed. That means steering people away from AMD overall. I don't know about you, but every time someone I know wants a new system or tech toy, they ask my opinion before buying. I'm happy to take a few minutes to research something for them and often suggest better alternatives... AMD is now off the menu...

  19. Re:The heater really works on Owner of Battery Fire Tesla Vehicle: Car 'Performed Very Well, Will Buy Again' · · Score: 1

    That's to melt the ice or soften the asphalt on the road, for better traction.

    You might think that, but this is actually the first step in a self recharging car that occasionally drops a flamed out battery pack to make room for new, chargeable batteries! Try not to park down wind of them... or, breathe in their general vicinity really...

  20. Re:It was better when it was wrong. on The Difference Between Film and Digital Photography (Video) · · Score: 1, Funny

    Dude, the NSA repository has a copy of EVERYONE'S pornography!
    Nothing is worse than that... but it was a pretty cool place to work until they told us to stop downloading stuff to our phones.

  21. Excellent.

    I would not be so flippant, Mr. Coward. It is known you use many different IP addresses, consume an astounding 3000 pizzas a day, have viewed virtually all the porn on the internet (many, many agents are reviewing that data on an ongoing basis), and have amassed a copy almost every movie and video game in the world. Once the spy televisions are in place it will be a trivial matter to locate you based on your consumption of illegitimately obtained Intellectual Property...
    #cusoon

  22. Re:History books?!?! on Robotic Boat Hits 1,000-Mile Mark In Transatlantic Crossing · · Score: 1

    It's a cool achievment? But historic?!?!?!

    Tides, rough seas, variable winds, rouge waves... space seems very peaceful in the turbulent vector changes department. Not saying there aren't dangerous conditions, but once you are headed in the correct direction in space you only have to worry about something smacking you in open space... or crippling programming errors that left your vessel blind and deaf. The sea might toss you multiple directions at the same time, and/or let you drop 40 feet from a wave crest. It would be something like a very prolonged launch stress test. So, yes, historic.

  23. Re:And what's the algorithm complexity? on Automatic Translation Without Dictionaries · · Score: 1

    Awl hour go rhythms spume pizza!

  24. Re:a few laws of physics problems here on Matchstick-Sized Sensor Can Record Your Private Chats Outdoors · · Score: 4, Informative

    ... If you want to set up a big acoustic array at the beach and record everyone's conversations, process it, and sell the product to whoever, that's perfectly legal...

    Unless you are openly and obviously (to the subjects being recorded) voice recording, most states don't allow the type of action you posit there. At least ONE party from each conversation has to consent to any recording and in 12 states EVERYONE must consent. There are limited "Presumed Consent" exceptions but a public beach would not be one of them. There is a quick review here:
    http://www.wingfieldaudio.com/surreptitious-recording.html
    Not sure about "through the walls" video/audio recording but I'd bet peeping tom laws would be made to suffice...

  25. Re:not off topic on Boy Scouts Bully Hacker Scouts Into Submission · · Score: 1

    He didn't tell the part about the shaggy dog... He was the camp mascot and went missing around the time of the fire. During the trip to town for bullets they had flyers made and placed them all over the area:

    Missing Dog!!!

    Lost black and white dog in the area of Camp Wannahhockaluggie.
    Three legged, missing right eye, recently castrated...
    Answers to the name LUCKY.