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The Pope isn't lurking /. with unlimited mod points.

Are you sure? Taco's been awfully friendly to him. As recently as when Geeks In Space aired, at least. Maybe Kurt's been given an editor account.

Its not very often that a piece of mail arrives in my snail mail box that I actually read, but when this envelope arrived, I had to open it. It was labeled with enticing comments like "What do women want" in a font that spanned almost the entire height of the envelope on both sides. And since Dragonball Z wasn't on for another 5 minutes, I opened it. If only I had known.

Now I'm not sure what I bought where that allowed my name to fall into the clutches of the warped corporation that sent this letter to me. I suspect that it was that copy of 'Girls Gone Wild' purchased one evening after 6 shots of whiskey, while watching Howard Stern on E! with Kurt The Pope and Sarcasta (Don't get it. Its horrible. After 60 seconds, it becomes remarkably similiar to pulling teeth as a "Real Girl" after "Real Girl" takes it off for a crowd of learing men. "Real" is code for "won't ever be in a magazine accused of exploiting women". The only really attractive women are the ones you've already seen in the ads. And when you add this soundtrack, it just makes it all seem evil).

So at this point, I've made the fatal mistake: I've opened the letter. never do that! They start fast and hard by attacking my belief system and forcing me to question my own manhood. Now I've never been particularly concerned in this dept. But here's the thing: even John Holmes would've been curious about this. He would open this package and think "Hrm, 2 extra inches! Why, that'd be nifty" and immediately order a case of LONGitude. And odds are it'd work and he'd end up gaining another foot and killing some poor chick on the set. Thank god LONGitude didn't exist in the 70s or there would have been a lot less porno, and lot more "John Holmes Kills Again" headlines.

So being good marketroids, they take things that I considered conventional wisdom, and they attack them in a carefully planned campaign designed to destroy any chance of ever having any sort of pride in my own sexuality again. In fact, if these statistics are true, I'm embarassed for our whole gender:

• 85% of women say they NEVER achieve an orgasm during sex...
• 72% of women said they FAKED orgasms they never had..
• 67% of women say they're UNHAPPY with their lover's penis size...

Sorry. Got a little out of hand there. I'm back now.

Now I am a college graduate. This doesn't make me smart: frankly, I'm not exactly sure how I managed to graduate in the first place. I just skipped 1 class less then allowed, and managed to squeeze by, setting records in "Collegiate Minimilaism" (this works really well in art. Less well in history). But during my academic sentence, I managed to take a whole biology class and its required lab. I learned much in these classes about biology, but even more important, they taught us all about "The Scientific Method (lather, rinse, repeat.)". This means that I can't just make stuff up and have it be true (as evidenced by the large number of "C's" I got in my labs). I mean, at first glance, this looks good: Its from a "Former Viagra Pharmacist". I mean, they don't say which viagra pharmacist, but if he's anything like my old pharmacist, he's like 50, and he hates it when you spend to much time playing tag in his store and reading his baseball card price lists without paying for them. This man is most definitely qualified to invent a Scientific Breakthrough like LONGitude.

Obviously he doesn't get much: the sad little white jacket is proof enough that he ain't a big hit with the ladies. So he's got incentive. Plus he works at a pharmacy. LONGitude's marketing materials explain that their product is 100% safe and natural, and contains Zinc, 300 Yohimbe, Maca, Catuaba, Muira Pauma, Oyster Meat, I-Arginee, Oat Stra, Nettle Leaf, Cayenne, Pumpkin Seed, Sarsaparilla, Orchic Substance, Licorice Root, Astragalus, Tribulus, Boron, and Ginseng. I bet this bored pharmacist has access to many of these chemicals, and since its not like it takes all day to give dirty looks to the teenagers that buy birth control and condoms. He would still have plenty of time to try every conceivably combination of these substances until he discovers the one that makes his dick bigger. I mean, with that many chemicals, one combination practically has to do it, so at least he had a goal.

So I'm sure you're thinking to yourself, 'So all this does is make my dick bigger?'. But NO thats not ALL. It has OTHER features that are just as important... the following features are quoted directly from the marketing materials, as I am not creative enough to actually concoct this stuff myself:

Strengthen and harden your erections like a length of STEEL PIPE! what exactly does this mean? My grammar resolution engine is confused by this sentance. And my grammar resolution engine is really generous all things considered, as evidenced by the fact that I ran this column through babelfish it came out in german for gods sake! What a shitty grammar checker!
Develop your PC Muscle to form a truly "muscular" looking penis that will impress and arouse your lover. I guarantee they'll brag to their friends. First off, I'm kind of opposed to developing a muscular looking anything. Second, I didn't know that there was an aesthetic for a muscular looking penis, and finally, I don't want my "lover" talking about my manhood to anyone (except girls who refused to date me in high school. She may brag to them all she wants). But now that I know there is an aesthetic that my penis should strive for, I have another part of my body to be embarassed about. And I thought it was just my bad haircut, beer gut, and teeth.

Enlarge your penis 1-4" or more AT HOME, without vacuum pumps, weights, or surgery. OR MORE! ADDING MORE THEN 4 INCHES?! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! OH MY GOD! FOUR FUCKING INCHES?! WHAT SORT OF CRAZY FOOL WOULD WOULD ATTEMPT TO ADD MORE THEN FOUR INCHES ONTO THEIR DICK! WHAT THE FUCK! ARE LOOKING FOR FUCKING RETARDS HERE?! ISN'T ENOUGH ENOUGH!? STOP THIS CRAZINESS!

Intensify your orgasms So you're telling me that this miracle herbal breakthrough will not only give me a wang that would make porn stars envious, but it will make orgasms better? Lets be honest here: there isn't much on this planet better then an orgasm in the first place. Telling me you can make them better is like like saying you figured out how to make heroin more pure, or removed the annoying sportscaster commentary from battlebots leaving only robots doing battle for the full 30 minutes, without commercials or annoying banter from lame broadcasters who weren't cool enough to compete with Dennis Miller.

And much, much more! Like what? Global peace and harmony? A recording contract with Sony for 3 albums with a multi-million dollar signing bonus? Sex with Jennifer Aniston (note: not year 2000 Jennifer Aniston as fucked by Brad Pitt, I'm talking about 1995 Jennifer Aniston, as nipples scene each week on "Friends"). But really, haven't you offered me enough? Length, Girth, Intensification, A bragging Girlfriend, and a more aesthetically pleasing muscular dick? What more could you provide? Could my semen taste like chocolate, or maybe be 100% pure liquid gold that I could sell on the market for a grand a jizz? I have to say that I suspect that I speak for all recipients of this random mass mailing when I say "No LONGitude, you've done enough. Thanks. But there's just no need for you to give me 'Much Much More' for this 'Low Price'".

With great power also comes greater responsibilities. 'CP Direct- Creators of LONGitutude' warn you that if you continue to take this miracle breakthrough in herbal medicine, you will continue to grow. They warn you not to grow beyond 9 inches because you will start damaging your dates! This is a fair warning: you just know some dude who burned his dick with scalding lethal McDonalds Coffee will overgrow his penis and impale some girl on his 17 inch piece, and he'll sue. And win. This is America, land of the free, where we should all be entitled to 17" cocks without fear of lawsuits.

8===========D

8===D

This diagram shows to scale just how much bigger LONGitude claims it can make you.

1. Your penis is small.
2. You thought LONGitude was a worthy investment towards solving #1
3. Your penis is still small.
4. You are fucking cheap and willing to swallow the embarassment of admitting all of the above just to reclaim your sixty bucks, even tho any male with one drop of self respect would simply forget the 60 bucks to save himself the embarassment of admitting that he is stupid, cheap and has a small dick.

He explains us that his drug will make the chambers of erectile tissue larger. Now I don't know about you, but I'm thinking of a balloon here, and what happens when you plug it into the helium machine and hold the lever down a little to long: yup, thats right. The balloon explodes and coats the room with a fine layer of human blood. I can't think of anything less sexy then having your dick explode, and coating you, your lover, and most importantly of all: your bedsheets with a mixture of seman, erectile tissue, and dozens of natural chemicals mixed together by former viagra pharmacists.

I hate doing laundry, and if your dick blows up on your "Lover", I'm willing to bet that not only will she never ever have sexual relations with you, but she will not speak a single word to you ever again. And believe you me, you will most definitely not scrub the erectile tissue out of your sheets... and that stuff just isn't gonna come out either.

Now I don't think that LONGitude would work any more then a penis pump. But I also have never tried a penis pump. And I know that there is a market for these things since I've seen them regularly at novelty shops next to the 14 inch double ended jet black vibrating dildo. However the fact that things like this exist proves that there is a market of people who would be willing to send their $59.95 to these guys. I considered it. Not for me of course. Purely in the name of science, I wanted to administer it to Kurt The Pope and Ryan the Felon before I risking my own genitals. After no deliberation, they both said no. Fuckers. This is science we're talking about. Maybe I should explain the scientific method to them again. I doubt it would matter... Dragonball Z is on. Its pretty tough to talk them into anything while Dragonball Z is on.

Its not very often that a piece of mail arrives in my snail mail box that I actually read, but when this envelope arrived, I had to open it. It was labeled with enticing comments like "What do women want" in a font that spanned almost the entire height of the envelope on both sides. And since Dragonball Z wasn't on for another 5 minutes, I opened it. If only I had known.

Now I'm not sure what I bought where that allowed my name to fall into the clutches of the warped corporation that sent this letter to me. I suspect that it was that copy of 'Girls Gone Wild' purchased one evening after 6 shots of whiskey, while watching Howard Stern on E! with Kurt The Pope and Sarcasta (Don't get it. Its horrible. After 60 seconds, it becomes remarkably similiar to pulling teeth as a "Real Girl" after "Real Girl" takes it off for a crowd of learing men. "Real" is code for "won't ever be in a magazine accused of exploiting women". The only really attractive women are the ones you've already seen in the ads. And when you add this soundtrack, it just makes it all seem evil).

So at this point, I've made the fatal mistake: I've opened the letter. never do that! They start fast and hard by attacking my belief system and forcing me to question my own manhood. Now I've never been particularly concerned in this dept. But here's the thing: even John Holmes would've been curious about this. He would open this package and think "Hrm, 2 extra inches! Why, that'd be nifty" and immediately order a case of LONGitude. And odds are it'd work and he'd end up gaining another foot and killing some poor chick on the set. Thank god LONGitude didn't exist in the 70s or there would have been a lot less porno, and lot more "John Holmes Kills Again" headlines.

So being good marketroids, they take things that I considered conventional wisdom, and they attack them in a carefully planned campaign designed to destroy any chance of ever having any sort of pride in my own sexuality again. In fact, if these statistics are true, I'm embarassed for our whole gender:

• 85% of women say they NEVER achieve an orgasm during sex...
• 72% of women said they FAKED orgasms they never had..
• 67% of women say they're UNHAPPY with their lover's penis size...

Sorry. Got a little out of hand there. I'm back now.

Now I am a college graduate. This doesn't make me smart: frankly, I'm not exactly sure how I managed to graduate in the first place. I just skipped 1 class less then allowed, and managed to squeeze by, setting records in "Collegiate Minimilaism" (this works really well in art. Less well in history). But during my academic sentence, I managed to take a whole biology class and its required lab. I learned much in these classes about biology, but even more important, they taught us all about "The Scientific Method (lather, rinse, repeat.)". This means that I can't just make stuff up and have it be true (as evidenced by the large number of "C's" I got in my labs). I mean, at first glance, this looks good: Its from a "Former Viagra Pharmacist". I mean, they don't say which viagra pharmacist, but if he's anything like my old pharmacist, he's like 50, and he hates it when you spend to much time playing tag in his store and reading his baseball card price lists without paying for them. This man is most definitely qualified to invent a Scientific Breakthrough like LONGitude.

Obviously he doesn't get much: the sad little white jacket is proof enough that he ain't a big hit with the ladies. So he's got incentive. Plus he works at a pharmacy. LONGitude's marketing materials explain that their product is 100% safe and natural, and contains Zinc, 300 Yohimbe, Maca, Catuaba, Muira Pauma, Oyster Meat, I-Arginee, Oat Stra, Nettle Leaf, Cayenne, Pumpkin Seed, Sarsaparilla, Orchic Substance, Licorice Root, Astragalus, Tribulus, Boron, and Ginseng. I bet this bored pharmacist has access to many of these chemicals, and since its not like it takes all day to give dirty looks to the teenagers that buy birth control and condoms. He would still have plenty of time to try every conceivably combination of these substances until he discovers the one that makes his dick bigger. I mean, with that many chemicals, one combination practically has to do it, so at least he had a goal.

So I'm sure you're thinking to yourself, 'So all this does is make my dick bigger?'. But NO thats not ALL. It has OTHER features that are just as important... the following features are quoted directly from the marketing materials, as I am not creative enough to actually concoct this stuff myself:

Strengthen and harden your erections like a length of STEEL PIPE! what exactly does this mean? My grammar resolution engine is confused by this sentance. And my grammar resolution engine is really generous all things considered, as evidenced by the fact that I ran this column through babelfish it came out in german for gods sake! What a shitty grammar checker!
Develop your PC Muscle to form a truly "muscular" looking penis that will impress and arouse your lover. I guarantee they'll brag to their friends. First off, I'm kind of opposed to developing a muscular looking anything. Second, I didn't know that there was an aesthetic for a muscular looking penis, and finally, I don't want my "lover" talking about my manhood to anyone (except girls who refused to date me in high school. She may brag to them all she wants). But now that I know there is an aesthetic that my penis should strive for, I have another part of my body to be embarassed about. And I thought it was just my bad haircut, beer gut, and teeth.

Enlarge your penis 1-4" or more AT HOME, without vacuum pumps, weights, or surgery. OR MORE! ADDING MORE THEN 4 INCHES?! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! OH MY GOD! FOUR FUCKING INCHES?! WHAT SORT OF CRAZY FOOL WOULD WOULD ATTEMPT TO ADD MORE THEN FOUR INCHES ONTO THEIR DICK! WHAT THE FUCK! ARE LOOKING FOR FUCKING RETARDS HERE?! ISN'T ENOUGH ENOUGH!? STOP THIS CRAZINESS!

Intensify your orgasms So you're telling me that this miracle herbal breakthrough will not only give me a wang that would make porn stars envious, but it will make orgasms better? Lets be honest here: there isn't much on this planet better then an orgasm in the first place. Telling me you can make them better is like like saying you figured out how to make heroin more pure, or removed the annoying sportscaster commentary from battlebots leaving only robots doing battle for the full 30 minutes, without commercials or annoying banter from lame broadcasters who weren't cool enough to compete with Dennis Miller.

And much, much more! Like what? Global peace and harmony? A recording contract with Sony for 3 albums with a multi-million dollar signing bonus? Sex with Jennifer Aniston (note: not year 2000 Jennifer Aniston as fucked by Brad Pitt, I'm talking about 1995 Jennifer Aniston, as nipples scene each week on "Friends"). But really, haven't you offered me enough? Length, Girth, Intensification, A bragging Girlfriend, and a more aesthetically pleasing muscular dick? What more could you provide? Could my semen taste like chocolate, or maybe be 100% pure liquid gold that I could sell on the market for a grand a jizz? I have to say that I suspect that I speak for all recipients of this random mass mailing when I say "No LONGitude, you've done enough. Thanks. But there's just no need for you to give me 'Much Much More' for this 'Low Price'".

With great power also comes greater responsibilities. 'CP Direct- Creators of LONGitutude' warn you that if you continue to take this miracle breakthrough in herbal medicine, you will continue to grow. They warn you not to grow beyond 9 inches because you will start damaging your dates! This is a fair warning: you just know some dude who burned his dick with scalding lethal McDonalds Coffee will overgrow his penis and impale some girl on his 17 inch piece, and he'll sue. And win. This is America, land of the free, where we should all be entitled to 17" cocks without fear of lawsuits.

8===========D

8===D

This diagram shows to scale just how much bigger LONGitude claims it can make you.

1. Your penis is small.
2. You thought LONGitude was a worthy investment towards solving #1
3. Your penis is still small.
4. You are fucking cheap and willing to swallow the embarassment of admitting all of the above just to reclaim your sixty bucks, even tho any male with one drop of self respect would simply forget the 60 bucks to save himself the embarassment of admitting that he is stupid, cheap and has a small dick.

He explains us that his drug will make the chambers of erectile tissue larger. Now I don't know about you, but I'm thinking of a balloon here, and what happens when you plug it into the helium machine and hold the lever down a little to long: yup, thats right. The balloon explodes and coats the room with a fine layer of human blood. I can't think of anything less sexy then having your dick explode, and coating you, your lover, and most importantly of all: your bedsheets with a mixture of seman, erectile tissue, and dozens of natural chemicals mixed together by former viagra pharmacists.

I hate doing laundry, and if your dick blows up on your "Lover", I'm willing to bet that not only will she never ever have sexual relations with you, but she will not speak a single word to you ever again. And believe you me, you will most definitely not scrub the erectile tissue out of your sheets... and that stuff just isn't gonna come out either.

Now I don't think that LONGitude would work any more then a penis pump. But I also have never tried a penis pump. And I know that there is a market for these things since I've seen them regularly at novelty shops next to the 14 inch double ended jet black vibrating dildo. However the fact that things like this exist proves that there is a market of people who would be willing to send their $59.95 to these guys. I considered it. Not for me of course. Purely in the name of science, I wanted to administer it to Kurt The Pope and Ryan the Felon before I risking my own genitals. After no deliberation, they both said no. Fuckers. This is science we're talking about. Maybe I should explain the scientific method to them again. I doubt it would matter... Dragonball Z is on. Its pretty tough to talk them into anything while Dragonball Z is on.

• 85% of women say they NEVER achieve an orgasm during sex...
• 72% of women said they FAKED orgasms they never had..
• 67% of women say they're UNHAPPY with their lover's penis size...

8===========D
8===D
This diagram shows to scale just how much bigger LONGitude claims it can make you.

1. Your penis is small.
2. You thought LONGitude was a worthy investment towards solving #1
3. Your penis is still small.
4. You are fucking cheap and willing to swallow the embarassment of admitting all of the above just to reclaim your sixty bucks, even tho any male with one drop of self respect would simply forget the 60 bucks to save himself the embarassment of admitting that he is stupid, cheap and has a small dick.

• 85% of women say they NEVER achieve an orgasm during sex...
• 72% of women said they FAKED orgasms they never had..
• 67% of women say they're UNHAPPY with their lover's penis size...

8===========D
8===D
This diagram shows to scale just how much bigger LONGitude claims it can make you.

1. Your penis is small.
2. You thought LONGitude was a worthy investment towards solving #1
3. Your penis is still small.
4. You are fucking cheap and willing to swallow the embarassment of admitting all of the above just to reclaim your sixty bucks, even tho any male with one drop of self respect would simply forget the 60 bucks to save himself the embarassment of admitting that he is stupid, cheap and has a small dick.

Faithcraft confirmed: the Christian faith is dying

One more crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered Christian community when recently ABC confirmed that Christians accounts for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all religions. Coming on the heels of the latest Faithcraft survey which plainly states that Christians have lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. The Christian faith is collapsing in complete disarray, as further exemplified by gaining first place in the recent comprehensive ignorant religion tests.

You don't need to be the Pope to predict the Christian future. The hand writing is on the wall: Christians face a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Christians because it is dying. Things are looking very bad for Christians. As many of us are already aware, Christians continue to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood. The Pope is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of his supporters.

Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.

ThePope leader Kurt states that there are 7000 users of Hindu. Let's see. The number of Hindu versus Christianity posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 Christian users. Christ posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of Hindu posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of Christ A recent article put pedophile priests at about 80 percent of the Christianity market. Therefore there are 300+10 = 310 Christian users. This is consistent with the number of all Christian Usenet posts.

Due to the troubles of Heaven, abysmal sales and so on, Christianity went out of business and were taken over by Sihks who sell another troubled religion. Now Sihk is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.

All major surveys show that Christians have steadily declined in market share. Christianity is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If it is to survive at all it will be among religious hobbyist dabblers. Christianity continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Christianity is dead.

Christianity is dying

Adequacy is dying

Yet another crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered Adequacy community when last month Slashdot confirmed that Adequacy accounts for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all trolling. Coming on the heels of the latest Geekizoid survey which plainly states that Adequacy has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. Adequacy is collapsing in complete disarray, as further exemplified by placing third-to-last in AST's recent listing of top five trollsites.

You don't need to be a streetlawyer [geocities.com] to predict Adequacy.org [adequacy.org]'s future. The hand writing is on the wall: Adequacy [adequacy.org] faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Adequacy.org [adequacy.org] because Adequacy [adequacy.org] is dying. Things are looking very bad for Adequacy [adequacy.org]. As many of us are already aware, Adequacy [adequacy.org] continues to lose site traffic.

Let's try to keep the facts and look at the numbers.

Slashdot [washington.edu] leader Rob "CmdrTaco" [cmdrtaco.net] Malda states that there are about 5000 semi-regular posters to Slashdot.org [washington.edu]. How many users of Geekizoid [geekizoid.com] are there? The ratio of Slashdot [washington.edu] to Geekizoid [geekizoid.com] posts is roughly in ratio of 100 to 1. Therefore there are about 5000/100 = 50 occasional Geekizoid [geekizoid.com] posters. The ratio of Adequacy [adequacy.org] posters to Geekizoid [geekizoid.com] posters is about 5 to 1. Therefore there are 50 * 5 = 250 occasional posters to Adequacy.org [adequacy.org]. This is approximately equal to the number of editors [adequacy.org] listed on Adequacy [adequacy.org]'s website added to the eleven non-editors who read the site.

Traffic [adequacy.org] to Adequacy [adequacy.org] continues to diminish. In July 2001, Adequacy [adequacy.org] received approximately 160,000 pageviews. In August, Adequacy [adequacy.org] received only 80,000 pageviews. The number of pageviews in September (as of September 10, when Adequacy cowardlyly hid their statistics) is 60,000, a paltry 37% of its July traffic. At current rates, the amount of Adequacy [adequacy.org] traffic will hit 0 by the end of the year.

According to Netcraft [netcraft.com], Adequacy [adequacy.org]'s situation is grim. Due to the troubles of Speakeasy DSL [speakeasy.org], DoS attacks and so on, Adequacy [adequacy.org] was forced out of business and was taken over by JAT Computer Consulting [jatnet.com] which hosts another troubled website [geekizoid.com]. Now JAT Computer Consulting [jatnet.com] is also dying, its corpse being turned over to another charnel house.

All major surveys show that Adequacy [adequacy.org] has steadily declined in readership. Adequacy [adequacy.org] is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If Adequacy [adequacy.org] is to survive at all it will be among right-wing maniacs [mynra.com], Libertarians [nazi.org], and trolls [kuro5hin.org]. Adequacy [adequacy.org] continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle [thepope.org] could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Adequacy.org [adequacy.org] is dead.

Adequacy is dying

You don't need to be a streetlawyer to predict Adequacy.org's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Adequacy faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Adequacy.org because Adequacy is dying. Things are looking very bad for Adequacy. As many of us are already aware, Adequacy continues to lose site traffic.

Let's try to keep the facts and look at the numbers.

Slashdot leader Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda states that there are about 5000 semi-regular posters to Slashdot.org. How many users of Geekizoid are there? The ratio of Slashdot to Geekizoid posts is roughly in ratio of 100 to 1. Therefore there are about 5000/100 = 50 occasional Geekizoid posters. The ratio of Adequacy posters to Geekizoid posters is about 5 to 1. Therefore there are 50 * 5 = 250 occasional posters to Adequacy.org. This is approximately equal to the number of editors listed on Adequacy's website added to the eleven non-editors who read the site.

Traffic to Adequacy continues to diminish. In July 2001, Adequacy received approximately 160,000 pageviews. In August, Adequacy received only 80,000 pageviews. The number of pageviews in September (as of September 11) is 60,000, a
paltry 37% of its July traffic. At current rates, the amount of Adequacy traffic will hit 0 by the end of the year.

According to Netcraft, Adequacy's situation is grim. Due to the troubles of Speakeasy DSL, DoS attacks and so on, Adequacy was forced out of business and was taken over by JAT Computer Consulting which hosts another troubled website. Now JAT Computer Consulting is also dying, its corpse being turned over to another charnal house.

All major surveys show that Adequacy has steadily declined in readership. Adequacy is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If Adequacy is to survive at all it will be among right-wing maniacs, Libertarians, and trolls. Adequacy continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Adequacy.org
is dead.

You don't need to be a streetlawyer to predict Adequacy.org's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Adequacy faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Adequacy.org because Adequacy is dying. Things are looking very bad for Adequacy. As many of us are already aware, Adequacy continues to lose site traffic.

Let's try to keep the facts and look at the numbers.

Slashdot leader Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda states that there are about 5000 semi-regular posters to Slashdot.org. How many users of Geekizoid are there? The ratio of Slashdot to Geekizoid posts is roughly in ratio of 100 to 1. Therefore there are about 5000/100 = 50 occasional Geekizoid posters. The ratio of Adequacy posters to Geekizoid posters is about 5 to 1. Therefore there are 50 * 5 = 250 occasional posters to Adequacy.org. This is approximately equal to the number of editors listed on Adequacy's website added to the eleven non-editors who read the site.

Traffic to Adequacy continues to diminish. In July 2001, Adequacy received approximately 160,000 pageviews. In August, Adequacy received only 80,000 pageviews. The number of pageviews in September (as of September 11) is 60,000, a
paltry 37% of its July traffic. At current rates, the amount of Adequacy traffic will hit 0 by the end of the year.

According to Netcraft, Adequacy's situation is grim. Due to the troubles of Speakeasy DSL, DoS attacks and so on, Adequacy was forced out of business and was taken over by JAT Computer Consulting which hosts another troubled website. Now JAT Computer Consulting is also dying, its corpse being turned over to another charnal house.

All major surveys show that Adequacy has steadily declined in readership. Adequacy is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If Adequacy is to survive at all it will be among right-wing maniacs, Libertarians, and trolls. Adequacy continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Adequacy.org
is dead.

You don't need to be a streetlawyer to predict Adequacy.org's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Adequacy faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Adequacy.org because Adequacy is dying. Things are looking
very bad for Adequacy. As many of us are already aware, Adequacy continues to lose site traffic.

Let's try to keep the facts and look at the numbers.

Slashdot leader Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda states that there are about 5000 semi-regular posters to Slashdot.org. How many users of Geekizoid are there? The ratio of Slashdot to Geekizoid posts is roughly in ratio of 100 to 1. Therefore there are about 5000/100 = 50 occasional Geekizoid posters. The ratio of Adequacy posters to Geekizoid posters is about 5 to 1. Therefore there are 50 * 5 = 250 occasional posters to Adequacy.org. This is approximately equal to the number of editors listed on Adequacy's website added to the eleven non-editors who read the site.

Traffic to Adequacy continues to diminish. In July 2001, Adequacy received approximately 160,000 pageviews. In August, Adequacy received only 80,000 pageviews. The number of pageviews in September (as of September 11) is 60,000, a
paltry 37% of its July traffic. At current rates, the amount of Adequacy traffic will hit 0 by the end of the year.

According to Netcraft, Adequacy's situation is grim. Due to the troubles of Speakeasy DSL, DoS attacks and so on, Adequacy was forced out of business and was taken over by JAT Computer Consulting which hosts another troubled website. Now JAT Computer Consulting is also dying, its corpse being turned over to another charnal house.

All major surveys show that Adequacy has steadily declined in readership. Adequacy is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If Adequacy is to survive at all it will be among right-wing maniacs, Libertarians, and trolls. Adequacy continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Adequacy.org
is dead.

You don't need to be a streetlawyer to predict Adequacy.org's future. The hand writing is on the wall: Adequacy faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for Adequacy.org because Adequacy is dying. Things are looking very bad for Adequacy. As many of us are already aware, Adequacy continues to lose site traffic.

Let's try to keep the facts and look at the numbers.

Slashdot leader Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda states that there are about 5000 semi-regular posters to Slashdot.org. How many users of Geekizoid are there? The ratio of Slashdot to Geekizoid posts is roughly in ratio of 100 to 1. Therefore there are about 5000/100 = 50 occasional Geekizoid posters. The ratio of Adequacy posters to Geekizoid posters is about 5 to 1. Therefore there are 50 * 5 = 250 occasional posters to Adequacy.org. This is approximately equal to the number of editors listed on Adequacy's website added to the eleven non-editors who read the site.

Traffic to Adequacy continues to diminish. In July 2001, Adequacy received approximately 160,000 pageviews. In August, Adequacy received only 80,000 pageviews. The number of pageviews in September (as of September 11) is 60,000, a
paltry 37% of its July traffic. At current rates, the amount of Adequacy traffic will hit 0 by the end of the year.

According to Netcraft, Adequacy's situation is grim. Due to the troubles of Speakeasy DSL, DoS attacks and so on, Adequacy was forced out of business and was taken over by JAT Computer Consulting which hosts another troubled website. Now JAT Computer Consulting is also dying, its corpse being turned over to another charnal house.

All major surveys show that Adequacy has steadily declined in readership. Adequacy is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If Adequacy is to survive at all it will be among right-wing maniacs, Libertarians, and trolls. Adequacy continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, Adequacy.org
is dead.

FOUND IT! as a link off of Slashdot even... http://thepope.org/index.pl?node=Create+Indulgence

Here's a cool link for finding pictures (scans, actually) of boobs to e-mail kurt@thepope.org

http://www.boobscan.com

http://thepope.org/~paco/

This one is NOT redundant!

Hey, I'm not the only one in on this then..

See, they called it episode 3-A, but then they went and named it episode 31........ The problem is that now GiS has almost exhausted the 2^5-2 namespace.

The solution? Mail "episode31.mp3" to kurt@thepope.org, and he will happily rename the file and return it to you.

With his help, as the unrecognised head of catholocism in Michigan, we might all be spared the problems of a small name space..
---

Not as bad as this one.

Damn...it's now $5 for an indulgence for listening to Geeks in Space. I wonder what I'm gonna have to give for posting to the forum?
At least it's not one of the deadly sins...

no need to fight. We should help the wounded.

Note: Link reposted 'cause nobody reads for the articles.
--

I like /. radio. I think it is very cool to hear the voices behind the names. I also like the way CowboyNeal pronounces his name correctly and everyone else just calls him Podder. Unfortunately, hearing you re-discuss topics that have already had their souls eaten by relentless over-discussion is kinda' like watching reruns of Cop Rock (painful because it was not that much fun the first time around).

My suggestion: Pick a more general topic and discuss amongst yourselves. It's a tried and true format. Some topics: How does one open source and still make a living? Is a new President likely to affect our precious Internet in any way? Are geeks confident or just cocky? Should Karma be auctioned on eBay? There are tons of topics that haven't been discussed-to-death yet.

I think this format change would have an indirect affect on the quality of the discussions as well. Right now, it appears that even you are bored with the topics. You have a tendency to talk about anything else that might pop up during the show. Don't get me wrong, I like a good fart joke as much as the next guy. I just believe in the "everything in moderation (except Tribes)" way of life.

Please keep up the Geeks In Space segment. Please officially make it a weekly event. Please talk about something new and exciting. Please e-mail Kurt. Please keep making me laugh at work.
Peace. Sway

You dared to defile the sacred name of SLASHDOT? Nothing but hot days in hell can befall you and your ilk. CmdrTaco is never wrong! Hemos is omniscient! RobLimo can see into the future! JonKatz runs windows without it crashing!

Linux advocates never lie, or would say anything that is less than true. For example, a linux user would never say

BILL GATES CLUBS BABY SEALS!

or even

MICROSOFT IS A COMMIE FRONT!

because Linux users are kind, wise people who never need to resort to FUD to support their beleiefs.

No go repent

~~~~~~~~~
auntfloyd

Email me here

Absolve me oh Pope!

"... message passing as the fundamental operation of the OS is just an excercise in computer science masturbation."