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The Oldest Knives In The Solar System
al-bob writes: "For the person who has everything: handmade knives crafted from meteorites! These are beautiful knives with handles and/or blades made from extraterrestrial source materials. The guy bills them as the 'oldest knives in the solar system.' As someone said, 'not for the light of wallet'.
" So, anyone wants to think of me for my next birthday ...
I could have sworn McLeod's sword (the one he picked up when Ramirez lost his head) was a very special Japanese Katana. I am not 100% sure if this is the same sword (movie) as in the series but this type of sword has was very special indeed. As explained to me by an expert in oriental antiques and armor, these swords were forged rather ceremoniously and were made of two types of steel. The 'Shingane' metal of the sword was a very low carbon steel and wasy very soft and provided great flexibilty in the final blade. The 'Kawagane' was the second steel used and was a very high carbon steel and is primarily responsible for the sharpness. A good sword maker typically controlled and increased additional carbon levels in his forge by a special process where the sword would be placed on the top of the hotest coals as new coals were pushed underneath them and allowed to burn. When the coals had burned to the original levels the sword would be taken out and worked while more coals were added. The swords were folded exactly 19 times. I cannot remember why exactly the number 19 but I beleive it was a superstition as the Japanese culture made powerful associations with specific numbers (ie 4 is bad luck ala 13 in the US yet 3 is very lucky ala 7 here). This number of folds has been debated vigorously for a long time. I understood it that 524,288 layers provided an unique combination of strength, flexibilty and the capability to keep an extremely sharp edge. (I have heard many times the number is 20 but the amount of layers created at 20 folds negated the effect and made for a very sharp very brittle sword.) Sword makers would sharpen swords and mark the 'Nakago' (tang) with a body count, the date, and thier signature each time the sword was serviced. The other sword bearing the mark of the Clan McLeod may have been damascus, this may be the sword you are referring to but I am unfamiliar with the particulars of it. Time to look for the tapes... an unfortunate side note: the expert was Dennis Szeszler, among the worlds foremost experts in oriental arts and culture. He passed away last year a few weeks before his 53 birthday of alchoholism. Dennis was my uncle.
Prospecting Stinks. Stop Wasting Time on Cold Calling.
one day in the "geek compound"...
mr. hemos: captain malda, i have determined that napster stories are bringing in three to five hundred comments a piece! think of the banner revenues!
captain malda: captain to engineering!
engineer roblimo: engineer roblimo here, sir.
captain malda: mr. roblimo... crank out some more napster stories!
engineer roblimo: but captain... the trained monkeys can't take much more! they're pulling them out of the queue as fast as they can!
captain malda: not fast enough, mr. roblimo!
engineer roblimo: we need more submissions!
captain malda: damnit, roblimo, just make something up!
lieutenant jamie: captain, we're receiving a transmission from an unidentified source.
captain malda: patch it through!
osm(over speaker): i want to open-source natalie portman's firm teen buttocks and pouting teen breasts!
helmsman emmett: captain... look!
an aibo approaches the compound.
lieutenant jamie: captain, the transmission is coming from the aibo!
captain malda: helmsman emmett... moderate it down: -2, flamebait!
helmsman emmett applies the moderation. the aibo pauses but keeps approaching.
osm (over speaker): your feeble moderation points are no match for the power of my modified aibo!
captain malda: engineering, we need more power in the moderation system!
engineer roblimo: but captain... the moderation system is at maximum power!
captain malda: i don't want excuses, roblimo... give me that power!
the aibo begins to move forward, a large antenna rises from the nose.
captain malda: mr. roblimo!
the antenna starts to glow.
captain malda: mr. roblimo!!
the antenna glows brighter.
engineer roblimo: captain! i have jerry-rigged the moderation system! i converted it to a bitchslap system!
captain malda: helmsman, fire!
helmsman emmett presses the fire button. just as an enormous comment begins transmitting through the speaker...
osm (over speaker): star (as in hot young actress) wars. a story of tender love. it is a period....
the transmission is terminated by the bitchslapping. captain malda relaxes.
captain malda: good work mr. roblimo!
mr. hemos: captain, sensors have detected that yeoman portman was beamed off the ship... into the aibo!
captain malda: lieutenant jamie, open a channel.
captain malda: osm! return yeoman portman at once!
yeoman portman (over speaker): blow it out your ass, dork! i want a real man! an open-source man! a man that knows how to caress my firm teen buttocks and suckle my pouting teen breasts! not a boy who has bad dreams and shits a lot!
osm (over speaker, clearly ecstatic): hahahahahahahahahahahaha! i took a bitchslapping for natalie portman! hahahahahahaahahahahahahaha! come natalie, i will take you to quicktrip and woo you with a vegetarian burrito. i will then take you to see the buffalo and touch you.
yeoman portman (over speaker): oh, open-source man! how my innocent teen heart has yearned for the tender touch of your open-source hand!
osm and yeoman portman (over speaker): hooray!
captain malda: cut that off!
the aibo turns and disappears. transmissions continue beaming from the aibo and are broadcast over the speaker.
captain malda: what the hell is the matter with that guy?!
dr. katz: damnit, rob, i'm a teen-angst zealot, not a psychiatrist!
captain malda (clearly infuriated): engineering!! where the hell are those napster stories?!!
i like german girls. and nannies.
While these are wicked cool if you have the cash, I just had to point out that they're not any older than anything else in the universe. If you want to go down to the level of quarks, the matter that makes up us, the knives, and the galaxies has been around for 12 billion years. Even then, as far as the formation of the solar system is concerned, our most recent data seems to show that the gas giants formed first, with the terrestrial planets all coming into existence at about the same time a few hundred million years later. Since most meteorites are either left over debris or remnants from a destroyed/failed planet between Mars and Jupiter, we basically have the knives tied, age-wise.
Anonymous Luddite: "What do you think of the dehumanizing effects of the Internet?"
Andy Grove: "Not Much."
i would like to order a set. My, uh, girlfriend needs a few knives in her back...uh, I mean rack...she needs a few knives in her kitchen rack.
Yours Sincerely,
Orenthal James Simspon
-- You see, there would be these conclusions that you could jump to
The knife in question is what is termed as an "Art Knife" (though most art knives don't venture quite so far into the rare/exotic materials category), sort of a functional work of art. How functional? Well, a priceless bit of jewelery, you can theoretically wear, but a priceless knife, you can theoretically use to prepare lunch. You might well never do either, but in theory, the knife is more practical :-)
There is quite a community of people (me included) who are fascinated by knives, and who carry one or more around as a matter of course -- perhaps not a $2100 meteorite art knife, mind you, but I do know people who carry (and use) $500 custom-made pocket knives on a daily basis. (And, by the way, the vast majority of these people are sane, rational, level-headed types, who consider their knives to be tools, not weapons.)
For the two percent or so of the studio audience who are thinking, "hmm, this meteorite knife isn't for me, but the topic of knives is interesting", I would heartily recommend these sites for further information:
This is the most popular "web-based BBS" site for discussion of all things sharp and shiny. Lively discussions with everyone from the merely curious to avid collectors, to amateur and professional knife makers, and the CEOs of some of the most highly regarded knife companies.
This online knife store is a one-man operation, a self-professed "collector turned dealer to support his habit" (and advocate for the sane use of sharp shiny things), who provides tons of good background information on the use, care, and rationale behind knives, without a hard sales pitch. My favorite place to point friends who become curious about knives.
Often they create blades that have been folded thousands of times.
This isn't quite precise; the Japanese swordsmiths usually fold it from 8-10 times, but as any self-respecting geek could tell you, that gives you a total number of layers of 256-1024.
In most cases some form of carbon steel is used
The Japanese process uses charred rice husks; they coat the iron with the husks, heat it and knock of the excess. If done correctly, it provides just the right amount of carbon to harden the blade (if you overdo it, the blade will be too brittle).
It's a modern replica. Damascus steel is essentially very high carbon steel, which would normally be as brittle as glass, but extensively hot worked to retain some ductility. Old Damascus steel was made of sponge iron painstakingly extracted as little nuggets and hammered together into larger pieces on a wooden anvil. The wood naturally carbonized and surface coatings of the carbon got successively layered into and the metallic matrix forming Fe3C. The carbide content gives the metal its edge and strength; the softer iron matrix it's ductility. Modern "Damascus" steels are almost always come from molten iron stock, which unlike the never molten sponge irons, has major ductility problems right from the start which precludes the hot working necessar to make it sufficiently ductile. To get around this, they use a soft low carbon core with layers of high carbon "Damascus" on top. It works OK, but it's not a true Damascus. To make a true Damascus, you need a primitive iron ore reducing fire, infinite patience to make sure all your sponge iron nuggets get chemically reduced without melting ore getting too much crud in them, a stong hammering arm, a wooden anvil, a non-flaking stone hammer, and, yes, a lot more time to keep working and working this thing over a course of weeks or months until it reaches the right combination of hardness/ductility. You /could/ make a modern Damascus the old way, but it would really try the patience and definitely not be economic.