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Attack of the Clones: Less Plastic Crap, More Story?

Newsweek has an article in which George Lucas states that there were parts of Episode One that were damaging to the Star Wars franchise. (shocker, I know) "The last movie did not live up to expectations." They'll cut the merchandise by two thirds, as they still have tons of unsold Episode One merchandise. Yahoo is also running an AOTC story. Mild spoilers in the linked stories, by the way.

29 of 431 comments (clear)

  1. Could you please... by Brad+Wilson · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...start reporting things before they're entire days (sometimes weeks) old? It's quite off-putting when us nerds get the news faster from Fark, which is hardly known to be the Speedy Gonzalez of news services. ;)

    1. Re:Could you please... by grinwell · · Score: 2, Funny

      Everyone should just skip AOTC and wait for the AOTC 2003 edit to come out.

      The Phantom Edit

      This news *is* a little old.
      The original fark link on 4/21

  2. Whew! by jmoriarty · · Score: 5, Funny

    At least now I know no major characters die at the end of the movie. Otherwise it would have been mentioned on Slashdot's main page.

    1. Re:Whew! by qslack · · Score: 5, Funny

      check up on facts first

      Welcome to Slashdot!

  3. ,nice hype but... by metalhed77 · · Score: 2, Funny

    doesn't the dialog in the new trailer look just as bad as episode 1?

    --
    Photos.
    1. Re:,nice hype but... by Wraithlyn · · Score: 3, Funny
      Yes... but...

      ***spoilers***

      • Yoda manipulating Force lightning and kicking ass with a lightsaber!
      • Many dozens of Jedis in a huge battle royale!
      • Boba Fett and father!
      • Extremely low Jar Jar content!
      • Natalie Portman in frolic mode!
      • Galactic War!
      --
      "Mind, as manifested by the capacity to make choices, is to some extent present in every electron." -Freeman Dyson
  4. perhaps a source of... by overbom · · Score: 2, Funny


    a new hope?

    sorry :-)

  5. Re:Episode II= Chick Flick by inerte · · Score: 3, Funny

    For some reason I have this huge fear the Episode II will be somewhat of a click flick. Please tell me I'm wrong.

    Clusters of wannabe Portman teenager girls, worry about that for a second.

  6. Re: Can we trust Lucas? by Black+Parrot · · Score: 4, Funny


    > There's even a Darth Vader Beer Stein for cryin' out loud!

    Real vaders quaff their brew out of their helmets.

    --
    Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
  7. Ah, but it's HOW you return it... by Ann+O'Nymous-Coward · · Score: 2, Funny
    "IS JAR JAR BINKS GOING TO EVER POKE HIS UGLY MUG ON SCREEN AGAIN? because if so I am returning my light saber."

    So am I.
    Direct to Georgieboy.
    Rectally. (Oh, for a _real_ one!) ;>

  8. Re:yeah right... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    No, this film is about IBM in the 80's, and how they lost the PC market.

  9. Award nomination by The+Cat · · Score: 5, Funny

    Lucasfilm saved its best goodies, though, for the Web geeks, a stratum of "Star Wars" fandom that, in the past, it had communicated with only via cease-and-desist orders.

    Absolutely brilliant line.

  10. Tons-o-Crap by ELCarlsson · · Score: 5, Funny

    I can just imagine an archeological expedition thousands of years from now digging up an old garbage dump and what do they find? Tons of unwanted Episode 1 merchandise. "What a strange idol they worshipped" :Pulls string: "Me'sa tink d'is a ba' idea!" They'll think we're morons.

    1. Re:Tons-o-Crap by pnatural · · Score: 5, Funny

      Unless, of course, the future archeologists are descendants of the French, in which case, they will think Jar Jar is brilliant.

  11. Re:Can we trust Lucas? by ag3n7 · · Score: 2, Funny

    A Darth Vader Beer stein??? Where? It'll look GREAT next to my Yoda hookah!!!

  12. Re:Revisiting TPM by selectspec · · Score: 5, Funny
    It's strange, that when you strip away all the hype, the product tie-ins, the in your face constant advertising, and just go see the movie on it's own merits, it's not really all that bad...

    ... it's worse.

    --

    Someone you trust is one of us.

  13. Say it with me, now: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    GEORGE LUCAS DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR OPINIONS.

    EP2 (or AOTC or whatever the fuck acronym you're using) could be called "I Hate All of You Stupid Fuckers," consisting of nothing but footage of Lucas taking a shit, and you would LINE UP AROUND THE BLOCK to see it. You will gladly pay him what he demands. Lucas relies on people like you.

  14. dialog by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Episode I dialog generator:

    if (drand48() < 0.5)
    return "be mindful";
    else
    return "you assume too much";

  15. Re:Delusional rich man makes more crap movies. by locust · · Score: 4, Funny
    Mod me down as flame


    The moderation options need a '+/-1: he asked for it'.


    --locust

  16. Re:I won't see Episode 2 by Xuff · · Score: 5, Funny

    In my day, we actually saw the movie before deciding weather it was good or not...

    --

    -Xuff
    Homepage & W
  17. Re:A Second Chance by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny



    Dear Seinethinker,

    Thank you so much for sharing your suggestions.

    After one second of consideration, I decided to print your post and use it to wipe my ass.

    I look forward to wiping my ass with the money that you and your friends will spend to see my new movie next month.

    Sincerely,
    George Lucas

  18. Re:Can we trust Lucas? by grahams · · Score: 4, Funny

    Sorry, but it is impossible to get .02 seconds of screen time. The smallest amount of screen time that is possible is .042 seconds ((1 second)/(24 fps) = .042).

    =)

  19. Re:A Second Chance by Sebastopol · · Score: 3, Funny

    Also, I was to look forward to a fluffer romance.

    Um... about "fluffer romance"... er... nevermind, i'll resist the childish impulse.

    --
    https://www.accountkiller.com/removal-requested
  20. Less Plastic Crap by istartedi · · Score: 3, Funny

    You mean, there's official Star Wars(TM) plastic crap, and I've never seen it??? If they're going to be making less of it, I'd better pick some up fast. No more generic fake do-do for me. From now on it's Star Wars(TM) plastic crap, or nothing at all... unless they make fake vomit too.

    --
    For all intensive purposes, "whom" is no longer a word. That begs the question, "who cares"?
  21. Re:Good one, George by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I expect Jar Jar to get screen time in Ep 2 as Natalie Portman's boobs, meaning a few seconds at most.

    hell i'd sit through 60 minutes of Jar Jar just to see that! :-P

  22. Star Wars Ep II cereal...c'mon by Sabalon · · Score: 5, Funny

    I remember when I was a bit younger, some products would have tie ins...perhaps you would get a starwars toy in your frosted flakes or at McDonalds or something.

    Now they are not even trying...they just have a "Star Wars Episode II" cereal - not even trying to hide a merchandising tie in.

    What's next: "Star Wars Corn Based Merchandising with Sugar"

    1. Re:Star Wars Ep II cereal...c'mon by linzeal · · Score: 2, Funny

      I'd buy jar-jar brand pesticide.

  23. Re:but what about...? by Spoing · · Score: 4, Funny
    That's Senator Jar-Jar Binks, at least according to IMDB [imdb.com] and other sources.

    Well, sadly, that explains laws like the DMCA.

    --
    A firewall can not protect you from yourself. Turn off what you do not need. Do not use the firewall to do your work.
  24. Re:Episode II= Chick Flick by inerte · · Score: 2, Funny

    There are condoms that glow in the dark. You haven't lived until you have used one of them and whisped "Swooooooosh, Vuuuummmm, Zuououoummmm" while making strange dances.