Slashdot Mirror
Cremation? Burial? How about Diamonds?
travisbecker writes "From Reuters via Yahoo! comes this story. "A Chicago company (Lifegem) says it has developed a process for turning cremated human remains into diamonds that can be worn as jewelry." As for the quality... "If it's done slowly and with a great deal of care, one could have a reasonably high-quality diamond," according to a quote in the story." This should not be confused with our earlier diamond discussion.
Now I know what my wife will have done with me after she has me bumped off!
I can just dig up bodies and make diamonds out of them? Now I can actually make MONEY from my hobby!
Are these diamonds still a girl's best friend?
Oh, this? It was my grandmother.
You mean it was your grandmother's ring?
No. It is my grandmother.
If Slashdot were chemistry it would look like this:Cadaverine
Now saying "You're a real gem" is a deaththreat, then?
... I could finally sell my uncle's body on EBay...
Can 21st century women expect to hear:
?Finding God in a Dog
Remember the general guide of two months worth of bodies for an engagement ring.
yes, but wouldn't an evil villian want to have there enemys made into jewlery they can wear?
thats the problem with todays youth, nobody thinks about the super villian.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Oh forgot about the Goth Market, how cool and depressing would it be to get your sister who committed suicide to be made into a diamond ring you can wear and always get truly depressed!
At $22,000 per carat, you could just go out and buy a 1 ct diamond for $7000 and say it's your dearly departed, and make an instant $15,000. Since you can't do DNA analysis to determine if the diamond is actually the person, what's to stop them from just doing that???
We have a new meaning for the term "Family Jewels".
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If he eats lots of food, and if he weighs 800+ pounds when he dies, there might be enough carbon in him to make a dildo out of pure diamond!
(Suggested epitaph: "She said she'd marry me for my money, but wouldn't put out until I could get it up and stay hard as a rock for at least an hour. Who's laughing now?")
Maybe it only happens in the movies, but I can't imagine the horror of spilling someone's ashes. This seems to me to be a very clean way to avoid that potential problem.
I would imagine that most people would put them in extremely nice display cases, rather than having them put into rings and pendants.
A nice thought, but it would instantly make your house a target for theft. I predict the rebirth of the cat burglar.
And on a only loosely related note, how much would this service cost for a pet?
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who, really, would want to wear their dad in a ring
It's not all that strange, it's just a matter of perspective.
Around the turn of the century (1900) it was very fashionable to wear jewelry made from a dead loved one's hair. Nobody thought it was morose.
Even now, how many people have dear ol' Mom's ashes in a jar on the mantle? Isn't that a little... weird... when you think about it?
My grandfather was buried behind the cabin at his deer-hunting camp. Isn't that a little... creepy?
People build marble buildings to house their remains. Now that's strange!
As for me, I want to be composted.
This is great. Do you think if I collect enough of my body tissue and hair and stuff that I can get one of these made while I'm alive?
Remember to look for Cut, Clarity, Color, Carat and Corpse.
You call me a pedant? I prefer the term "correct"
Actually, it was chrisd's final statement that spoked me:
This should not be confused with our earlier diamond discussion.
You remember, don't you? The one that went like so:
Would you buy one for the love of your life? I know my girlfriend would love a diamond, but ethically I have my doubts. Diseased-miners, child slave labour, cartel inflated prices...
I guess we have to add murders and grave robbing to that list now! Those evil diamond traders will do anything to get more raw materials for their diabolical schemes!
GMD
watch this
How about making yourself into a frisbee for your family and friends. :)
Sometimes it's best to just let stupid people be stupid.
Soylent Diamonds is PEOPLE!
I particularly enjoy the idea that after the departed one's cremains have been converted to diamonds, the diamonds will be graded. One has to wonder:
--Will the obese deceased yield a higher number of carats?
--Will the chaste deceased score higher on clarity?
--Will the intelligent deceased get a "brilliant" cut?
And, of course...
--What affect will the race of the deceased have on the color?
"How to Do Nothing," kids activities, back in print!
hehe.
This feels like it's straight from a Final Fantasy game. I can be a piece of Materia someday! Now all they need to do is figure out how to summon people back out of the diamonds for a whopping good time.
The man who trades freedom for security does not deserve nor will he ever receive either. - Benjamin Franklin
So she said to me: "I'm getting a diamond from you, one way or another."
--
$tar -xvf
lets hear it for fat grandparents...
bigger diamonds!
ill take grandma earrings, grandpa inlayed into my cane, and if possible i'd like sparky my dog as a necklace.
my aunt loved music, perhaps she can focus the lazer on my cd player or something to that effect.
There's nothing Intelligent about Intelligent Design.
Can do. Just post your name, social security number (US residents only please), address, next of kin, and your lawyer's name and we'll send a Vinnie right over with a branch chipper. Oh, you want to WAIT a while... Want the installment plan?
And I got this fabulous tennis bracelet.
Instead of proposing with that passed down family diamond ring with "This was my grandmother's ring..." it would now become... "This is my grandmother..."
...they learn to construct a perfect copy of the universe from a slice of cake.
Now I know the answer to:
a) whether to get an expensive engagement ring or not, and
b) How to get rid of my mother in law
all in one!
So does Anonymous Coward have good karma?
yes, but wouldn't an evil villian want to have there enemys made into jewlery they can wear?
I would perfer using them as a focus for my laser death beamy thing (which, always seem to, for whatever reason, require a huge diamond of some kind).
Though with the carat requirements of most laser death thingies, I would likely need to get multiple arch enemies compressed into one uber diamond of death and destruction. . . .
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Excellent, now I can just wear a braclet or elegent neclace instead of walking around with the shrunken heads of my enemies tied on a string.
One can't fault the convenience factor, but
I don't know, I don't think it will have quite the same, er, impact.
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You forgot about the third kind of blue diamonds, found in Lucky Charms cereal.
Hey kids, there's only 5 days left 'til Yak Shaving Day!