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Australia Oppresses Jedi
eberry writes "Despite over 70,000 respondents (.37% of the population) replying "Jedi" to an optional faith question on Australia's census, it will not become a recognized religion According to CNN "Australian officials say respondents could face a $1,000 fine for supplying false information. Citing, and I quote, "...people of a particular religious affiliation do not provide the correct information, certain facilities might not be built that otherwise would be."
Personally I find their lack of faith disturbing." And I find the fact that this is on CNN even more so ;)
Make them use the force to move some shit around the room. If they can do it, let them have their religion.
Hell, make the fatter ones do 1 sit up and I'll believe they've mastered the force.
Nerd(robotic voice): I am a Storm-Trooper!
Triumph the Wonder Dog(robotic voice, mockingly): You are a huge nerd!
Finally, math books without any of that base 6 crap in them.
They need to know if they should build the Death Star or not!
Apparently they will haev to prove they are, or at least were members of the Jedi Relegion. Perhaps a questionare Would be appropriate..
1. Have you ever tried to convince someone that the driods in your possession were NOT in fact the driods they were looking for?
2. Did you ever have a crush on Princess Leah but had a strange feeling the cosmos would never let it happen.. Not even realizing she was your sister?
3. While drivign down the street at night have you ever turned off your headlights and driven using only the force? did you live?
Of course if it were me and they were asking me to proove I was of the Jedi faith, Id insist they make the christians prove they were christians.. Do you love thy neighbor even when they are mowing the lawn at 5am on a sunday.. Etc..
-Jason
when followers bring in doctors notes testifying to their "midichlorian count".
Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
They didn't lie on their census forms.*waves hand*
"History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme." Mark Twain
You don't need to fill out our silly forms.
"All you need to do is count how many people live here."
All we need to do is count how many people live here.
"Just move along."
I'll just move along.
/. If the government wants us to respect the law, it should set a better example.
What if you just made something up for the form? What if you put "Linusian", "Openus Sourcinerous", "United Temple of The Perl", "Orthodox Geek", etc.....?
Table-ized A.I.
If the Australian Government strikes the Jedi down, they will become more powerful than they could possibly imagine!
I'll be honest, we're throwing science against the wall to see what sticks. -Cave Johnson
...and the great theological question would be:
;)
"Did Balrogs have wings?"
Only the dead have seen the end of war.
(Note: I just picked Lutheran out of a hat as an example. Don't read more into it than that.)
Oh, I thought it was because you had created them in a petri dish from one of your teeth and some cola.
Damn it, is there any topic that can't have a Simpsons reference thrown into it?
Hey kids, there's only 5 days left 'til Yak Shaving Day!
How do you know if someone's really a Jedi? Easy - no one expects the Australian Inquisition!
Your right to not believe: Americans United for Separation of Church and
The Klingons from Star Trek could be seen as a quite honorable, but also quite sadistic because it involves killing random people on a daily basis.
RANDOM? You fool! Those who follow the Klingon doctrines only kill the weak! You are fortunate that you are not a Klingon, or I would kill you for your ignorance!
> (pauses for response from the Draco-Human
> Anti-Defamation League)
Boy, are you gonna get flamed for that.
Don't be so sure, we of the sith believe that nothing is indivisible, a well aimed blast from the death star can divide just about anything.
-- Any comments seen here are not mine, but a mixture of alchohol and lack of sleep.