Slashdot Mirror
Nicotine-Free Cigs, Genetically Engineered
jim.b0b writes "Wired has an interesting article about nicotine-free cigarettes, made from genetically engineered tobacco grown by Amish farmers. Vector Tobacco is hoping that their Quest cigarettes will make them a viable competitor to RJR and Phillip Morris. Don't worry, they are nicotine-free, not carcinogen-free."
Grown by Amish farmers? Hmm... Something about this doesn't smell right. ;-)
...genetically engineered tobacco grown by Amish farmers
'nuff said.
slashdot!=valid HTML
Until then, I waive my paw at them and say "Bah"
Still, with a plan, you only get the best you can imagine. I'd always hoped for something better than that. -CP
Like parachuting from a 4-feet ladder.
love slashdot. populate it. use it. abuse it. hate it. kill it. miss it. stop following links, they only kill servers.
... as the Amish plan to start producing buggies without wheels by the second quarter of 2004.
*nix.org - You say you want a revolution?
Reply or e-mail; don't vaguely moderate. Ex-O'Reilly/MIT employee, now a full-time Google employee.
Ishmael: Hey Ezekiel! I have an idea! We can grow genetically engineered tobacco that is non-habit forming!!!
Ezekiel: That's wonderful! What is genetic engineering?
Ishmael: Well, you take this machine, plug it in, and...oh...nevermind.
People have been clamoring for years for a cigarette that still tastes terrible, makes you smell, and kills you but doesn't get you high. I'll bet these will be really popular among the total idiot crowd.
Reminds me of an old Larry Niven quote about smoking. (sorry if I must paraphrase, I cannot remember the exact wording) "I love smoking, I think it's one of the few joys in life. If they ever make a cigarette that doesn't kill you, I'd start smoking again in a flash."
I read the internet for the articles.
Isnt another name for this marijuana?
These are for the health-conscious geek who wants to get laid.
Forget cigarettes... smoke a salmon.
There are only 10 kinds of people in this world... those who understand binary and those who don't
The picture at the bottom of the article has the following caption:
An Amish farmer takes a cell phone call as transgenic tobacco dries inside his 250-year-old barn in Holland, Pennsylvania.
Wonder what he uses for a ringer? Maybe a knock and a voice saying "Jedediah, thee has a call".
Come to think of it.. how does he recharge the thing?
As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows
Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
I've churned butter once or twice
Living in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice
Living in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price
Living in an Amish paradise
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him and turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in hell
But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
And my homies all I agree I look good in black... fool
If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired
There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
Not a single luxury
Like Robinson Caruso
It's as primitave as can be
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice
Living in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice
Living in an Amish paradise
Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
Think you're really rightous? Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
On my knees day and night scorin' points for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might just have to get medieval on your heinie
We been spending most our lives
Living in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites
Living in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights
Living in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Living in an Amish paradise
Yuck
Im a smoker. I can go without smoking for a few days if the need be. I'm not as addicted to the nicotine as I am the psychological connection to the action of smoking.
*cough*denial*cough*
You can't take the sky from me...
I thought you were talking about Jessica Alba.
Day 1: Start smoking nicotine free ciggies. Maybe these aren't so bad.
;)
Day 2: Ladedadeda...I'm fine, just don't talk to me.
Day 3: Jesus Christ, why do I work with such idiots?
Day 4: Are all users fucking morons or something? Jesus, what sort of prick can't set up Outlook?
Day 5: Ok, that's it, I've had enough of ALL of you! SOMEONE HAND ME THE AMMUNITION!
Day 6: Profi...oops, got carried away there.
Put another way, you can have my nicotine sticks when you prise them from my cold dead cancer ridden hand
????
Anyone...???
Anyone..????
Beuler...????
This will happen, mark my words. That's the reason birth control ads have to specify that the pill doesn't keep you from getting AIDS.
If they're smart big tobacco will get on the bandwaggon and market their own nicotine free smokes. they can worm out of lawsiuts by saying "look, we clearly offer non addictive cigarettes. is it our fault to chose the addictive ones? No."
That, and they can market it like it's some sort of health food. Hell, that new light beer (I think it's like michaelob ultra lite or something) is being marketed with pictures of people doing sit-up and jumping jacks and shit. They're selling beer like it was PowerAde. MO and RJR can do the same thing and treat it like it's aroma therapy or something.
Blaze a trail to the New World
Ahhh, killing yourself slowly and horribly with none of the satisfaction associated with the real thing. It's like just eating what's in the grease trough of a Foreman grill and throwing the hamburger away.
*cue deep, addicted-cow voice*
T-O-M-A-C-C-O
"*cough*denial*cough*"
That's a nasty cough you've got there. Maybe you should give up ?
graspee
At least my nicotinergic receptors were sufficiently and pleasantly stimulated during my lifetime.
Translation:
At least my nicotinergic receptors were sufficiently and pleasantly stimulated during my shortened, putrid, more expensive lifetime (filled with yellow teeth, nicotine stained hands, uncontrollable cravings, and the knowledge that my filthy habit was unhealthy to the people that were close to me).
"Using palladium to treat tobacco"
DRM == less carcinogens
You heard it hear first!
Have you considered taking up drinking?
~Idarubicin
I expect these will do about as well on the market as amphetamine-free speed, and nudity-free porn.
I would never put in my body something genetically engineered, think of the damage it could cause me.
Heck, it may give me cancer for all I know.
If Marlboro were to sell nic-free cigarettes, and that caused people to lose their addiction, therefore causing probably a good number of them to quit, wouldn't that be a hit to the bottom line?
How often is a fool born?
Dacels Jewelers can't be trusted.
New Smokable Nicotine Sticks: Can They Help Smokers Quit?
"Using palladium to treat tobacco, they produced a cigarette that caused 70 percent fewer tumors in mice."
:)
Guess that's final then, Palladium is a Good Thing after all
... and then there were none
Some caffeine-free Mountain Dew I had up north. Further proof that it is possible to market and sell products with no purpose.
The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.
It is also proven that dihydrogen oxide is lethal to everyone ingesting it
;)
Water? Well I guess it is lethal to breathe it.