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Speeding up Evolution
DaytonCIM writes ""We can rebuild him. Make him stronger... faster..." Slate.com has a great article on next generation gene research that promises to build "Supermen" or "Superwomen" out of us all. Insulin-like Growth Factor genes to make us stronger without ever visiting a weight room. EPO to generate more red blood cells and enable us to run "forever." Engineered human "Blood" to speed up evolution, so that we become less susceptible to disease and injury."
Of course, according to Star Trek, the Eugenics wars took place during the 1990s, so these supermen must already be among us. I'm sure that when the footage is de-classified, we'll all enjoy a bunch of fascinating documentaries on how these scientists already did their stuff back in the 70s....
Last time I checked Superman was in a wheelchair, and Supergirl had been cancelled by the WB.
In the year 2000, genetic enhancements will make everyone look super beautiful, the downside being everyone will look exactly like one another. Ahhh... Don't you love conan obrien?
He can code large masses of programs with a single keystroke, Absorb boxes of pizza with nary a thought, never shaves for days on end! It's... Internet boy!.. Genetically modified so that... oh.. wait.. we already have people like that...
in girum imus nocte et consumimur igni
Just check your e-mail in-box. Your spam filter has probably been inadvertantly deleting messages that explain how to get enhancements.
Donate background CPU time to fight cancer.
I never thought I'd see the day when only two of these were spam, and the others were actual opportunities of a lifetime.
"Make your penis 3 inches longer."
"Grow Muscle Mass without exercise."
"Horny cheerleaders wet 4 u"
"Run virtually forever without breaking a sweat."
Good luck to the SPAM Assassin folks if I can't tell the difference.
---Just check your e-mail in-box.
(checking).....(done)
Well, I've got a very high potential of increasing penis and breast size. And if I act now, I'll get double the 'supplements'.
Great, now all the old folks will leech my social security momey fovever. As if social security wasn't screwed already.
If those damn aliens had a decent QA team I wouldn't need any enhancements.
The obvious solution would be to find new and exciting ways to murder people!
hey!
Can they make a radioactive spider bite me so I can walk on walls?
The following statement is false.
The previous statement is true.
Welcome to my world.
Soon, I'll be so far ahead of the rest of humanity I'll be able to read /. stories an average of 10 to 20 minutes before the rest of you surrender-monkeys.
I tried it and went back to mutt. I do agree that evolution should be sped up, though. It was a little on the slow side, as I recall.
Ideally, we should only allow someone to live forever if they are sterile, is that a good trade off?
and it's also important to remember, you end up with two distinct classes of hyper-evolved beings: the good guys, led by Professor X, and the evil mutants, led by Magneto.
...That you can't do anything with because you've become impotent. This is the true cause of 'roid rage.
And the women all have big breasts, oddly colored hair, and wear little to no clothing! I love evolution, don't you?
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actually, I think it'll lead to more variety... I can just see the kid begging their parents:
"Jack's mom let him grow horns! Why won't you just let me get tusks?"
That's the killer application that genetic engineering solely needed. oh yeah.
Sure it's not a "C"?
The heart beats only so many times before wearing out (as an aside almost all animals have the same number of lifetime heart beats regardless of size, environment etc except humans have about 3X as many
So, theoreticaly, I could greatly enhance my lifespan simply by sleeping more, avoiding stress, and never exercising?
This message was brought to you by the death of 30 brain cells.
...why does an email client need to be turbocharged?
They think they can speed up a mail client by giving it features like blood? This is going to be even more bloated than Outlook... not good.
"I'd wand really black skin, two small horns, and (most important) a thick layer of soft, white sheep wool (everywhere but on my face, hands, etc.). That way, I wouldn't have to think about what I want to wear when I go out. In the summers I'd have myself shorn so that I wouldn't get too hot, and I'd always be experimenting with dying my wool in various artistic ways."
You vote democrat, don't you?