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Perl Haiku Poetry Contest
ActiveState writes "Tell us why you love Perl. ActiveState is pleased to announce the ActiveState Perl Haiku Poetry Contest. Do you love Perl as much as we do? Then prove it with your passion, creativity, and wit! Categories include Best Haiku Poem Written in Perl and Best Haiku Poem About Perl. All entries will be featured on our website. Winners will be selected by ActiveState's Perl development team. Prizes will be awarded for the top three entries in each category and include licenses for ASPN Perl featuring Komodo Professional Edition, and cool ActiveState gear.
The deadline for entries is 12:00PM PST, February 8, 2004. Winners will be announced on February 10. Full contest rules are also online.
Good luck!"
open(heart_to_perl);
content-type: haiku/firstpost;
or die "i fail it";
Vonal Declosion
Damn CLPM
I just wanted to know how
to run CGI
I have been pwned because my
Haiku deluge
Slashdot posts again
Now I am scared
Purl Gurl, Gozilla
Same person behind the name
Uri, do you care?
I have been pwned because my
Fuck all your haiku
I just can't stand reading them
Don't you know they suck?
if you were a real perl hacker, your script would be one line and generate its own haikus.
My problem? I was perfectly gruntled, until some numbnuts came by and dissed me.
haiku is too hard
i can never remember
how many syllables you are supposed to put in each line
I've almost got a winner but what I really need to know, is how many syllables are there in: $_=~/[a-z]['")]*[.!?]+['")]*\s/g)
Larry Wall made Perl
See the State of the Onion
Go to Wall.org
Vonal Declosion
Ask -that- guy at work:
"You could just write a Perl script
to do that, you know."
I don't like haiku.
I can never remember
the meter.
Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl
Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl
Perl Perl Perl Perl Perl
Lamness filter! Damn! Now how do I get past it? Don't know. Just give up.
This post patent pending.
Larry is funny
His humor is real nerdy
But still, he's married
Vonal Declosion
A language you say?
Doubtful, gibberish perhaps.
Debugging, -> brain fail.
Wrote a script in May
The damn program broke today
Can't grok my own code
I have been pwned because my
absurd elephantine interpreter
each version incompatible with the last
god how i luv it
I take you have been laying in wait for years now, preparing your lines, knowing that there would come a day...
a day when Slashdot would combine Perl and haiku...
Revel in now 'cause it will never come again.
That is until next week when it gets duped.
while S T D IN
print dollar sign underscore
close curly bracket
foreach keys %problems
delete $problems{$_}
Life should work like that
Java: the bastard demon spawn of C++ and Ada
This post is timely!
I was just telling my boss
that Perl is bad.
The language is great.
Expressiveness *and* power.
bitch to maintain tho.
and they write haiku
in this programming language?
boss, I rest my case.
Hash, pound, bang, and slash
Why does Perl sound so angry?
The Parrot will die.
I have been pwned because my
I think you will find that
there is more
than one way to do it
One 'l' in Randal
Like there's one 'l' in Larry
RTFM, Newb.
I have been pwned because my
My entry for this contest will be in iambic pentameter. And they better accept it because, in Perl, there is always more than one way to do it.
Larry Wall's language
is not obfuscatory.
Just need more coffee.
Copyrights, Patents, Trademarks: temporary loans from the Public Domain, not real property ("intellectual" or otherwise)
In other words, perhaps...
Contest is a sham!
They don't define a haiku!
We're not mindreaders!
Copyrights, Patents, Trademarks: temporary loans from the Public Domain, not real property ("intellectual" or otherwise)
First five syllables
Then seven, then five again
Blah, blah, fucking blah...
Call me old fashioned, but I like a dump to be as memorable as it is devastating - Bender
0ne thr33 thr33 s3v3n
h4x0r5 0n teh yu0r pC?
ch3ck yu0r megahurtz
sometimes seventeen
syllables ain't enough to
express a complete
I have a girlfriend whose name doesn't end in
public class Haiku {
public static void main(String
args[]) { System.out.print(
"too much preamble " +
"this intro is so common " +
"why can't it be short? "
)}; }
}
In Soviet Russia
Perl compiler debugs you
Quick mention of summer
perl and PHP?
the comparison is loose
just like your mother
The mod points say "troll"?
Maybe that's South African
For "really hard drugs"
Wow, we sow the seeds,
Then nature grows the seeds, and
Then we eat the seeds
What do we have here?
All of Ms Kendall's knickers
That need a good wash
Stickiest bogey
Made by Toxteth O'Grady
Of the USA
The world's stupidest
Bottom-burp is Vyvyan?
No, it says Rik here...
Crop rotation in
The 14th century was
Widespread after... John
And, for a limited time (because I'm at work), a haiku rendition of the theme song!
Once in a lifetime
Comes love like this; I need you,
And you me - you see?
The young ones, darling,
We're the young ones, and young ones
Shouldn't be afraid
To live, love, there's a
Song to be sung, we may not
Be young ones for long
Attack its weak point for massive damage!
Hmmm. A sad haiku?
Taint checks I did ignore
Open shell command with bad pipe
My hard drive now gone
A happy haiku
Met a girl on chat
Perl script calls me when she's online
I will score soon now
And self-completing plus poetic Perl, Perl, do you use
To compile your own hai-kus
Regexps fun to abuse
Big explosion in
punctuation factory
Result? Perl. Good Luck...
open bracket, bang
colon backslash asterisk
oops, forgot a quote
Finally, finished!
Undefined variable.
Camel book flies far.
How do I do this?
Answer: "Easy, just use perl"
Programmer gets punched.
Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage