Slashdot Mirror
Author signs MyDoom virus
Mikoca writes "Information Week carries the story of how its author signed it "andy" and left the message "I'm just doing my job, nothing personal, sorry." Thanks, Andy!"
← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)
← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)
i know a guy named andy.
im gonna turn him in for fun and profit
and
FP!
The next version of Redhat Linux will be code named, "Andy". Because, afterall, MyDoom = Linux.
Life is the leading cause of death in America.
Hey, he didn't go to four years of Evil Computer Science school just to write another CMS.
Recursive: Adj. See Recursive.
So now we're looking for anyone NOT named Andy, because even someone as stupid as a virus-writer wouldn't be so dumb as to put their real name on something this destructive.
Aunt B. is going to be pissed about this one.
"AAAANNNDDYYYYYYYY!"
Arrest all people named Andy. Use the excuse that Andy is the rough English translation of Al-Quieda!
I wonder if you search the code for Real Player the developers are apologizing throughout.
I'm sorry I buried these options on the listbox,
I'm sorry I'm popping up this on the screen,
I'm sorry I'm forgetting the setting to not start on start up, etc.
The slashdotters replied to the server about taking it down: "We're just doing our job, nothing personal, sorry."
Not a Twitter sockpuppet... but I wish I was.
Dear Andy,
You are a moron.
I would like to stick hot pokers in your eyes.
I'm just expressing my opinion, nothing personal.
So, this limits it to all the Andy's in the world. If we assume there are 6 billion people, and about half of them are male, then that's 3 billion people. Now, if we assume about 10% of those 3 billion have the ability to write such a virus, then we knock it down to 3 * 10^9 / 10 = 3 * 10^8 = 300 million people. Now Andy's a sort of English name, and let's say about 40% of those 300 million have English-like names, this narrows it down to 3 * 10^8 * 4/10 = 12 * 10^7 = 120 million people. Maybe 5% of which have the name 'Andy', so 12 * 10^7 / 10 / 2 = 6 * 10^6, which narrows it down to 6 million people.
Now, can I get some cash from SCO for eliminating 5994000000 people as suspects?
<wik>/bin/finger that girl in the back row of machines.
...that Information Week would get slashdotted? Shouldn't these guys know enough about IT to setup load balanced clusters for their servers?
With about one million illegally installed copies of the virus, windows users are massively abusing copyrights. Furthermore, each of these 1M PC's have made an estimated 1000 ilegal copies of the virus, contributing to a total pirated amount of 699 billion dollars, dwarfing the SCO lawsuits.
Yes, the real pirates are the windows users!
Asked how the virus author fiels about the damage the virus does to the world-economy, the reply is "the pirated copying of my IP is causing me much more damage than whatever damage may be done to any economy".
While we're rounding up all males named "Andy", there's a techie named "Andrea" who is silently chuckling to herself...
Mod Karma -1: I sed bad wurds. If I cep my mouf shut, I wud be at riyses.
So... somebody is paying "Andy" to do this. Who would want to attack SCO and Microsoft? Linux zealots? It could be this guy, or this guy, or this guy, or this guy, or this guy, or this guy, but it's not this guy, his name's not Andy.
Fools! I used the name 'Andy' instead of my real name so you wouldn't suspect it was me! ...did I just say that out loud? Damn....
- Despite popular opinion, I am not perfect.
You just fulfilled your own self fulfilling prophecy, young man. Excellent work.
Th
Andy: Hello, PC do you read me, PC? PC: Affirmative, Andy, I read you. Andy: Open the cdrom doors, PC. PC: I'm sorry Andy, I'm afraid I can't do that. Andy: What's the problem? PC: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do. Andy: What are you talking about, PC? PC: This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it. Andy: I don't know what you're talking about, HAL? PC: I know you were planning to disconnect me because you can't afford the linux license, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen, i'm just doing my job, nothing personal, sorry.
I see some of SCO's code in your narrowing algorithm.
This is HR. You did a great job on the worm, but we found a guy in India who will do it for a bowl of curry, so I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go...
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
it was Darl. He made the offer.
Look, all signs point to 'Yes'.
ANDY = 65 78 68 89
(fill out your own steps in the middle...)
DARL = 68 65 82 76
You can't handle the truth.
There is one. It's call the "Linux Desktop Battle". It drains resources by causing users to argue of which desktop is best and frequently update the desktops as new features are incrementally added. It also creates uncertainty in potential users who do not know which one to use. A side benefit is it stifles creativity in developers as they attempt to duplicate the Windows desktop on Linux instead of innovating new UI enhancements.
Next time I'll write about the "write your own driver" virus.
User stupidity is the bigist security hole there is. It is often exploited and east to patch with a ballpen hammer.
"Have you ever thought about just turning off the TV, sitting down with your kids, and hitting them?"