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Spammer Apologizes

radarsat1 writes "The Globe and Mail reports that Canadian professional spammer Eric Head, after being sued by Yahoo!, has apologized formally for his behaviour and vows to mend his ways by teaching others about the dangers of the internet. Let's hope others begin to take his lead."

37 of 288 comments (clear)

  1. Assuming... by Cragen · · Score: 5, Funny

    that he doesn't do it by email...

    1. Re:Assuming... by daveashcroft · · Score: 5, Funny

      Lets *ALL* email him to say thanks for the apology. Five thousand times each. ;-)

  2. (Eric) Head, Talking! by American+AC+in+Paris · · Score: 5, Funny

    And you may ask yourself
    Am I right? Am I wrong?
    And you may say to yourself
    My god! What have I done?

    --

    Obliteracy: Words with explosions

  3. "vows to mend his ways by teaching others about th by geek · · Score: 5, Insightful

    "vows to mend his ways by teaching others about the dangers of the internet."

    Is that supposed to be a joke? Come on, what a cop out. I'm all for people reforming, but why does this sound so phoney? I give it 6 months before he's back at it again, probably based out of China or Russia.

  4. Oh, ok... by Cytlid · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...if I ever see him, I'll beat the crap outta him. Then apologize.

    --
    FLR
  5. What is he sorry for? by mhesseltine · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Is he sorry that he bothered millions of users, clogged up mailboxes, and generally made a nusiance of himself? Or, is he sorry that he got caught?

    And, if he's teaching about the "dangers of the internet," does that mean he'll teach people to avoid scams like the ones he launched? Or, is he going to teach other spammers about how he got caught?

    --
    Overrated / Underrated : Moderation :: Anonymous Coward : Posting
  6. I A M S@RRY by apachetoolbox · · Score: 5, Funny

    PL3 SE F0RG IVE ME

    *No PrescrlptlonNeeded
    *Fully Confldential
    *No Embarrassment
    *No Waiting Rooms
    *Shlpped Overnlght
    *Dlscreet Packaging

  7. Spammer apologizes.... by kpansky · · Score: 5, Funny

    RTFA. The spammer will apologize and will work for a charitable organization. Already he has plans to send out emails asking to help the Nigerian Prime Minister unlock trillions of dollars from the Sultan of Brunei -- all he needs is a small donation from YOU!

    --

    --Kevin
  8. This sucks. by mothz · · Score: 5, Funny

    I better start stocking up on those penis pills before they become scarce!

  9. *Sniffle* by SkiddyRowe · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I can imagine what it looked like

    "I'm sorry, I didn't realize it would be such a problem!" *wipes nose with C-note* "I only wanted to make a couple extra dollars a month, put an extra bread roll on the table..." *lights cigarette from burning $50*

    He may be sorry, but I'm sure his bank account isn't...

    1. Re:*Sniffle* by BobPaul · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I urge everyone who is involved in the commercial bulk e-mail business to cease all operations unless and until they are completely compliant with the requirements of the new United States anti-spam laws. There is no substitute for complete compliance

      Translation? "I just got sued by yahoo and this isn't worth it anymore. I think I'll take the rest of my dirty money and retire with this one last publicity stunt."

  10. I wonder... by neilcSD · · Score: 5, Insightful

    ...how sorry he would have felt if he hadn't been caught and sued. More than likely he'd still be hijacking people's computers and spamming away. Money has a way of compromising people.

  11. Not Bad by netfool · · Score: 5, Insightful

    94,000,000 emails in a single month. If 1% of those emails made them a single dollar the would still gross $940,000 (US $687,034). That's pretty impressive for 1 month's work (hell, I'd still be impressed if it was over 5 years).

    Now what, they pay $100,000, move to Tahiti and retire for the rest of their lives? That'll show'em!

    --
    Left 4 Dead Gaming Group - http://www.l4dgg.com
    1. Re:Not Bad by wcrowe · · Score: 4, Insightful

      That's why spamming should be a capital crime. Let him apologize from prison.

      This apology is an insult to anyone who actually has to work for a living.

      --
      Proverbs 21:19
  12. Nothing says "I'm sorry" by earthforce_1 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Like being on the receiving end of a lawsuit.

    Wanna bet a public apology was part of the secret settlement terms?

    --
    My rights don't need management.
  13. JavaScript by Walrus99 · · Score: 5, Informative

    Use JavaScript to write your e-mail on your web page to fool the spambots. Won't tell you how, to avoid mono-culture, but easy to do yourself. Or set up a cgi web page on your site for e-mail adresses that require a button click to get to.

  14. Rule #1 by lofoforabr · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Spammers lie.

  15. Wait a minute... by rhadamanthus · · Score: 4, Insightful
    "dangers of the Internet"?

    What is that and how is he qualified to teach people about it?

    I guess that's getting to be the standard line now -- "Honest, I'm really sorry. But I'm not responsible, it was the Internet!"

    What's next, "I'm sorry I was drunk and ran over you're kid but the road was responsible. I'll teach poeple about the dangers of driving."

    sheesh. --rhad

    --
    Slashdot needs to interview Natalie Portman.
  16. The right direction by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Insightful

    "Let's hope others begin to take his lead"

    Let's hope other businesses take Yahoo's lead and sue the HELL out of spammers.

  17. I'll accept his apology if... by GPLDAN · · Score: 5, Funny

    He formally changes his first name to "Dick". And says his first and last name each time he introduces himself.

  18. Ob Simpson's Quote by ragefan · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hello, this is Homer Simpson, a.k.a. Happy Dude. The court has ordered
    me to call every person in town to apologize for my telemarketing scam.
    I'm sorry. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me, send one
    dollar to Sorry Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. You have the
    power.

  19. How to make a million dollars by Ridgelift · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Wow, now I know how to get rich:

    1) Setup massive spamming operation
    2) Make millions
    3) Get sued and settle for a mere six figures
    4) Stop spamming operation
    5) Tell world you going to help children

    So within the scope of a year or two, everyone will forget how this man made his fortune, and revere him for his good works helping children.

    Sounds a lot like the Carnegie Legacy

  20. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 5, Funny

    Comment removed based on user account deletion

  21. How noble! by abertoll · · Score: 4, Insightful

    After making a fortune off of annoying other people, he thinks that saying he's sorry is going to make us like him again. Maybe if he gives all his money to charity I'll feel better.

    --
    "he drew his sword Ringil that glittered like ice... and he wounded Morgoth with seven wounds..."
  22. BEWARE THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET by IthnkImParanoid · · Score: 5, Insightful
    You see, the internet is so dangerous. The dangerous internet is to blame, not I. Just look at this horrifying list of dangers:
    • Allowed me to act like a jackass, and get myself sued.
    Yes, the internet is truly something to be feared.

    -Eric (aka Shit) Head.

    Not for sarcasm impaired: I'm not actually Eric Head.
    --
    It's nothing but crumpled porno and Ayn Rand.
  23. Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about by value_added · · Score: 4, Insightful

    "Is that supposed to be a joke?"

    I'd characterise the judgment as creative if not novel plea bargaining by a good lawyer.

    If it helps, think of it as the Al Gore version of picking up trash from the side of a freeway. Personally, I'd rather see him picking up trash. Without the orange vest.

  24. Spam sucks by hackstraw · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I admin a small mail server and trap mail with spamassassin. On average we get about 100 spams per day for only 7 active email accounts.

    To check for false positives, I review all of the trapped mail from time to time, and I'm starting to get discusted with the whole spam thing. Here is some of the crap that I get:

    GET VALIUM AND MANY OTHER DRUGS 4 L j
    China World Trade Corp making major breakthroughs
    GET YOUR UNI.VERSITY D|PLOMA tqlylsrvi
    Take advantage of low interest-rates!
    Powerful weightloss now available where you are.
    Fwd:re:Home del.very on all meds.


    I'm also starting to get amused at how easy it is to identify spam with enough rules in spamassassin. These guys suck at sending mail.

    I just can't believe that some people actually respond to some of the mails. The ones that get me are the mortage and loan ones. Who in their right mind would give all of their financial information to someone who randomly emails you with junk like this:

    HellWo dear hom5ke oUwn5er,

    We have b\eeQn notified that y<oiur mortgMage rate is fixed at a
    vet6ry hoyigh interesNt rate. Therefore yhqou are current overpay[ing,
    whick7h sumsRs-up to twhXo+usaEAnds of dollXLarws an5RnudPal0ly .

    Lugckily for you we can [1]guoGaranteze th@e lowest r{ates in the U.S.
    ([2]3.50%). So hSVu=rry beQ0caNuse the ratHe f.orecast i|s not
    l;oobrkincNg good!

    Thesgre is no obligations, an6d i^t FykREAE

    Locnk on the 3.50%, even wHSith bad credit3A!


    Where all of the urls are behind a yahoo redirector, and its barely legible from all of the obfuscation techniques?

    Fuck spam specific laws, it just should be illegal to try to get money from someone under the pretense of deception. Clearly mails like this are deception, and its getting out of hand.

    1. Re:Spam sucks by Mordaximus · · Score: 4, Interesting

      That's exacly why I usually only need two steps in my handy spam finding recipe :

      1) Check the header for the usual.
      2) Pipe the subject and body to a shell script that returns the number of spelling errors (via aspell etc.).

      Too big a number from #2 means spam, l33t, very poor spelling or an email that is not english at all. None of which I care to read anyways!

    2. Re:Spam sucks by rossz · · Score: 5, Informative
      Pipe the subject and body to a shell script that returns the number of spelling errors (via aspell etc.).
      That isn't going to work. I did a study of spelling errors in spam and legitimate email People's spelling in email messages is so bad, plus with technical jargon and/or programming terms not in the dictionary, the error rate in non-spam vs spam is not different enough to make spell checking a viable antispamming tool.

      You can see my results here: Spam Spell

      --
      -- Will program for bandwidth
  25. Subject: LEARN ABOUT THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET by mothz · · Score: 5, Funny

    From: "Eric Head"
    Subject: LEARN ABOUT THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET

    STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL & URGENT.

    Dear,
    Are you sick of getting scammed? Have you been burned by offers to consol1date your m0rtg.age, add 1nches to your man hood, or win a fre-ee is1and get@way?

    We all have! BUT NO MORE!

    "The Dangers of the Internet", the incredible new book by Eric Head, former Director of DirectConsumer Marketing Affairs for a Fortune 500 company*, will show YOU how to keep from getting scammed in the future! Best of all, the book is absolutely FRIE, with your purchase of this inexpensive herbal v1@gra alternative! Only three payments of $39.99 each, WOW!!

    *in China.

  26. Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about by wwest4 · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Who's to say? It's hard to gauge sincerity from print.

    I think it may just be a reality shift for a lot of these spammers. They all seem so indignant at first, when accused of being slimy Internet carpet-baggers. But on the other hand, people are always encouraged to seek fortune, and originally there were no rules, lots of money to be had, and old adages about opportunity knocking.

    Once the money is rolling in, anyone would be tempted to rationalize their own business practice, even after being kicked off of relays, threatened with lawsuits, and having your iron pushed offshore. Once you're invested in something, it's hard to stop believing in it. That's why you see people go down kicking and screaming and come up contrite after a jury of peers schools them in the prevailing ethics.

    Bottom line - not everyone is destined to be a repeat offender. Even if he toes the line for a while and doesn't buy it, maybe he'll educate consumers or discourage future spammers along the way, or maybe he'll start buying his own sermon.

  27. Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about by Tackhead · · Score: 5, Insightful
    > "vows to mend his ways by teaching others about the dangers of the internet."
    >
    > Is that supposed to be a joke? Come on, what a cop out. I'm all for people reforming, but why does this sound so phoney? I give it 6 months before he's back at it again, probably based out of China or Russia.

    You're an optimist.

    The Rules Of Spam:
    1) Spammers lie.
    2) If a spammer seems to be telling the truth, see rule #1.
    3) Spam is theft.
    4) Most spammers are stupid.
    5) The natural course of a spamming business is to go bankrupt.

    Considering that a lawsuit from Yahoo was the motivation of his "apology", and that his apology lays the bullshit on thicker than even you said, to wit:

    "He's going to play in a band and find a way to use his knowledge to help protect kids on the Internet."

    Not just "others", but the chilllllllldrun!

    I'll see your six months and raise you three: I give him 90 days before he's spamming again, and place a side bet with 10:1 odds that as per Rule #4, the spam comes from hijacked PCs connected through a Yahoo! co-branded service such as SBC-Yahoo DSL.

  28. Simple solution to spam by adam613 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Get high profile spammers to send out bulk emails critical of the Church of Scientology, and watch them sue each other to death.

  29. This is not an apology by bereza · · Score: 4, Insightful

    A quote from the article is "regret for any inconvenience he may have caused". He doesn't even admit that he _did_ cause inconvenience or even what he actually did.

    This is the kind of non-apology that seems pretty common though. If you follow the words sorry with "if" or "may" or "might have", then it's not an apology.

  30. opt-out is still wrong by Skapare · · Score: 4, Insightful
    "I urge everyone who is involved in the commercial bulk e-mail business to cease all operations unless and until they are completely compliant with the requirements of the new United States anti-spam laws. There is no substitute for complete compliance," he said.

    This is a bunch of crock. Compliance with that bogus law (the U-CAN-SPAM law) doesn't mean it isn't theft. This guy is obviously still thinking like a spammer.

    "It is critical that every person be given an opportunity to opt-out of receiving e-mail correspondence promoting commercial products."

    No one should ever have to opt-out of anything they never opted-in to in the first place.

    There are 28+ million businesses (from largest to smallest) in the US (and plenty more outside the US). If just 1 million of these businesses decided to send you just one mailing (that you didn't ask for) per year (and you don't even need to opt-out because they won't send another for a whole year), and assuming they send them evenly spread throughout the year, then you will be getting one every 31.556952 seconds on average (depending on what year it is). More likely, those mailings will come in bunches. Since you won't have to opt-out, you can just press "delete" over 2737 times a day, every day. That would be over 83 thousand pieces of mail a month (imagine what that would do to the typical $9.95 a month dialup internet account).

    Now imagine if they all were giving you an opportunity to opt-out via their web site.

    If we allow spamming to become the norm, then every business will end up having to do it to just keep an equivalent advantage. That could mean that 150 million internet users would each get spammed from 20 million businesses. That would be 3 quadrillion (that's 3000 trillion) pieces of useless mail overloading the internet mail server infrastructure.

    --
    now we need to go OSS in diesel cars
  31. Re:Rule #1. Spammers lie. by grahamlee · · Score: 4, Funny

    " The pills won't make your penis larger."

    But I thought that one pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small, and the ones that mother gives you don't do anything at all! Just ask the rabbit, when he's ten feet tall.

  32. Spammers are "stupid"? by Saeed+al-Sahaf · · Score: 4, Insightful
    4) Most spammers are stupid.

    One of the problems is that most spammers are not stupid. Now, they may be slime, they may be sociopaths, but stupid? Perhaps underestimating spammers in this way (which is common) is counterproductive to eliminating spam. And, virtually every CEO in this great country is more of a sleaze than most spammers, a much bigger leach on society. Are they too, "stupid"?

    --
    "Who are in control, they are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!" - Glen Beck