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Kevin Smith set for Clerks sequel
bckrispi writes "Director Kevin Smith has announced an official sequel to his indie cult classic, Clerks. Currently titled "The Passion of the Clerks", the film will pick up with Dante and Randal ten years after the original as our two heroes trudge through the malaise of their thirties. Jason Mewes, now out of rehab, is back on deck to play Jay across Smith's Silent Bob."
--Dante
More quotes.
Right is wrong when left is right.
Just don't accidentally suck any dick on the way to the theater! :)
You are not the customer.
Watching this movie is gonna be like having sex with a dead guy. (kidding, Clerks is awesome)
Love the Third Amendment?
ten years later and still a clerk....must be nice to have that kind of job security
What role is Ramzi (Hacking with Ramzi) gonna play???
Am I missing something? I thought I already saw the sequel. It was called Mall Rats . . . No, Chasing Amy . . . No, wait, it was called Dogma. Maybe Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back? I'm so confused.
Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
Or, among slashdot readers, I once called this computer "girlfriend"...
I still chuckle at that bit ten years later.
You are in error. No-one is screaming. Thank you for your cooperation.
Jay: All you motherfuckers are gonna pay. You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fuck your mothers while you watch and cry like little bitches. Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax fucks who are making that movie, we're gonna make 'em eat our shit, then shit out our shit, then eat their shit which is made up of our shit that we made 'em eat. Then you're all you motherfucks are next. Love, Jay and Silent Bob.
I assure you, I will watch this film.
And I understand it will be filmed entirely in Aramaic.
When I first saw this I was going to think he was trying to make a quick buck.
Then I thought about Kevin Smith. And I think he just going to make a movie with some friends, and have a good time. You never can go home, but you can sure as hell visit.
Things I would like to see in the movie.
1. Jays cussing Olaf with his Berserker song become a star.
2. Randall come out of the closet.
3. Randall as Dantes boss.
4. Silent Bob having a love Child with Kaitleen bree.
5. Another Hockey game on the roof" any balls down there, BOUT THE BIGGEST PAIR YOU WILL EVER SEE"
6. What number of dicks Dantes ex is actually on now.
Puto
The Revolution Will Not Be Televised
OH now that's just mean. Mallrats, although a humorous look at nerddom, corrupted the original Jay we all knew and loved from clerks. Jay #1 uttered some of the funniest lines in cinematic history. " Shit yeah, Silent Bob...You know you're cute as hell. I like to take you, suck you, line up three other guys and make like a circus seal. Ya, Fuckin Faggot! I hate guys...I love WOMEN!" Pure genius. :-P
In the new version, Dante shoots first.
(If this makes no sense, look for the original "alternate" ending to Clerks.)
Norman Cook's Ode to Sl
Clerks 2: Electric Boogaloo
There is no off postion on the genius switch. - David Letterman
Wait wait, I thought it wasn't for critics.
[o]_O
Surely you jest. No way would he would indulge in illegal goods.
"All you motherfuckers are gonna pay, You are the ones who are the ball-lickers. We're gonna fuck your mothers while you watch and cry like little bitches. Once we get to Slashdot and find those karma-whore fucks who are talking shit, we're gonna make 'em eat our shit, then shit out our shit, then eat their shit which is made up of our shit that we made 'em eat. Then you're all fucking next."
Cretin - a powerful and flexible CD reencoder
Also, didn't he promise to retire jay and sbob after their terrible solo movie?
I guess if he had, he might have actually made a movie people wanted to see.
I'll take Joey Jeremiah and the Zit Remedy over Jay and Silent Bob any frickin day of the week.
Snake, Wheels, Joey.. The madcap adventures. Remember when they bought that case of beer? (One case for a party with about 50 people at it). Of course, they got busted and learned a valuable lesson.
Or when Joey sold the fake drugs to that chick who then ran around pretending to be high? "Degrassi Grass". Heh, classic. Yick Yew the disorganized. So many good times, and so many well-deserved naps in "social studies" class when they would show us a repeat of last-nights episode.
No wonder Smith is a fan. The stuff was lightyears ahead of anything he's ever done, and was produced on a budget that made Clerks look like a Hollywood blockbuster.
I don't need no instructions to know how to rock!!!!
The setting: Krog's mother's front porch early in the morning of January 28, 2005. Me and Silent Bob have just rung his doorbell.
Jay - Hello. Do you post as krog on Slashdot.org?
Krog - Yeah. Why?
Jay - Did you at any time ever claim to be Jay and Silent Bob?
Krog - Yeah, a while ago. Why?
Me and Silent Bob beat the shit out of krog
Love,
Jay and Silent Bob
Hmmm... he could alternatively put $50M in the production of trailers. Then people could think they're getting a big-budget film.
As a Kevin Smith fan, perhaps you could explain why you are a Kevin Smith fan in the first place?
Kevin Smith, to me at least, is your everyperson, a guy who you could have had a beer with and talk about your favorite flicks or comics or other stuff that I was interested in while growing up. He is the example of someone who likes movies to the point that he made his own, even at quite the cost (in the case of Clerks, a temp enrollment in film school and humongo credit card debt). So, in this respect, you could say I have huge admiration for the man.
Plus, as many Smith fans will agree, the man knows how to write dialog. A perfect example of this is in Clerks. While the whole presentation was "sophomoric" to a certain extent, his whole dialog on the contract works for the second Death Star was a great hoot (specially now that I am a government contractor, ironically enough). He talked about the lameness of crap jobs and Star Wars in Clerks. He discussed comic books and mallratting in Mallrats. I could go on, but I won't. His dialog that helped to get his point across was easy to relate to. So what if everyone talked in monologue, it was the point that mattered. I would go so far as to say he was one of many voices for the teens growing up in the 90's.
Now, I am not without criticism. Mallrats wasn't his best work, although it was very funny. Also, I felt the sh!t demon in Dogma did nothing for the movie. Jersey Girl was good but just a bit too derivative. For these reasons, those three movies aren't near the top of the list, which would go: Chasing Amy, Clerks, J&SBSB, Dogma, Mallrats, and Jersey Girl. I enjoyed all of them, but some a great deal more than others. JG shouldn't be included in the list, as it is a COMPLETELY different movie, but in the rankings of Mr. Smith's work, those the picks.
Bryan R.
The price of freedom is eternal vigilance, or $12.50 as seen on eBay.....
From Jay and Silent Bob Strike back:
i ke-to-play-golf-touchy-feely-picture you're supposed to be doing this week.
Ben Affleck is talking to Matt Damon (playing themselves in a sequel to "Good Will Hunting").
Matt Damon : Just take it from "It's a good course."
Ben Affleck : Oh, now you're the director.
Matt Damon : Hey shove it, Bounce-boy. Let's remember who talked who into doing this shit in the first place. Talking me into Dogma was one thing, but this...
Ben Affleck : Hey look, I'm sorry I dragged you away from whatever-gay-serial-killers-who-ride-horses-and-l
Matt Damon : I take it you haven't seen Forces of Nature?
Ben Affleck : You're like a child. What've I been telling you? You gotta do the safe picture. Then you can do the art picture. But then sometimes you gotta do the payback picture because your friend says you owe him.
[They both take a beat and look at the camera]
Ben Affleck : And sometimes, you have to go back to the well.
Matt Damon : And sometimes, you do Reindeer Games.
Ben Affleck : See, that's just mean.
You are the ball licker, because you do in fact lick balls!
If a job's not worth doing, it's not worth doing right.
I think it'd be interesting if Randall and Dante somehow ended up in IT doing hell-desk or Systems Administration. Just picture Randall, the BOFH.
Randall: This job would be great if it wasn't for the fscking (l)users.
Randall: I'm firm believer in a ruling class, especially since I have root.
Randall: (yelling at retreating luser) You're not allowed on my network here anymore.
/*drunk.. fix later*/
Isnt it ironic
dont ya think
a little too ironic
Jay and Silent Bob are terrible, one-note jokes that only stoners laugh at. They're fucking clown shoes. If they were real, I'd beat the shit out of them for being so stupid. I can't believe Miramax would have anything to do with this shit. I, for one, will be boycotting this movie. Who's with me?
What, like rain on your wedding day?
No, Alanis, that's just *FUCKING BAD LUCK*!
Perhaps that's because they are unreasonable assholes?
;)
Or could it be that my view is tainted since I'm female?