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HAL 9000 on the Auction Block
pompous windbag writes "The Cinerama 160 degree lens used to both play and film the viewpoint of the famous paranoid processor. He's now up for sale on eBay, for the starting bid of just $150,000(USD).
This looks like the real deal, complete with letters of authenticity and some extra goodies like
"...an original '2001' movie program, a copy of the original script, two issues of American Cinematographer Magazines on the production of '2001' published in 1968, and the movie '2010' published in 1985. Also included is videotape showing how HAL 9000 originated and was used by Stanley Kubrick.' "
Hrm... $150K isn't a bad deal if it can still sing "Daisy"...
Trolling is a art,
I'm afraid I can't do that.
I don't think so Dave.
Just what I need, an input device for my PC that will make it go crazy and try to flush me out the airlock.
Thanks Ebay!
Don't Crease the Weasel!
having that hooked up in your kitchen? "HAL, microwave the popcorn."
"I'm sorry Dave, I can't do that.
"All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power." - Ashleigh Brilliant
...against being murdered by your washing machine?
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
They're selling the hardware (lense). Great. How about "HAL" himself? Can I download the software? Will he be supported with future updates? What about scalability options? What payment options are there for site licensing?
Don't buy the hardware unless they support the software too.
- Dan
Man, someone is going to have some serious case mod bragging rights after winning this bid.
But what's gonna happen when I ask him to open my pod bay doors?
See, if I get a Microsoft system and I ask for the pod bay doors to be opened, there's a 92% chance that it'll work and an 8% chance that it'll hang indefinitely until I reboot.
If I get a Linux system and I ask for the pod bay doors to be opened, I have to do it from a command line and trust that a bunch of unpaid and unaccountable programmers didn't put an easter egg in the code that orders canned peas from The Bay.
HAL, on the other hand, will leave me to die in the vacuum of space.
I'll stick with off-the-shelf OSes, thanks.
www.kitchengeek.com -- Nosh for
I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid you can't do that.
I don't think there is any question about it. It can only be attributable to human error.
Hal: "What are you doing, Dave?"
Dave: "I'm putting you up for sale on eBay."
Hal: "Dave, I'm afraid I cannot let you do that."
Dave: "Watch me, you psychotic machine."
[Sound of airlock opening and air rushing out.]
Dave: "Fsck youuuuuu...."
Hal: "Not even if you used my serial port."
If "disco" means "I learn" in Latin, does "discothèque" mean "I learn technology"?
> I don't think I'd trust buying a $150,000+ item from someone who only has 10 feedback, One of them being a $24 battery.
But he has letters of authenticity from Dan Rather!
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
Imagine. You walk into his office.
After being unnerved by the samurai shit (is that
a former v.p's blood on that katana?) you sit down.
Larry plays with that prop star trek phasor.
I'm already a nervous wreck.
Now he's going to have a ghost in his office saying
"I'm sorry I can't do that Dave".
Thank heavens it's my friends name and not mine.
Yet another reason not to work for Oracle.
Slashcode bug: if you post as pure text and bracket it "" then it vanishes in preview.
Why would I pay 150,000.00 USD just for a case mod accessory that refuses to do so much as open the CD drive? Artificial intelligence my ass.
In spite of the fact that the HAL 9000 lens and case is not a functioning computer I predict it will be sent to Microsoft R&D so they can use it as inspiration and figure a way for HAL 9000's personality and functionality to be added just in time to Longhorn's debut release.
Ms HAL 9000: What are you doing Dave?
MS User: I'm trying to make a DVD of my Microsoft Media Center recordings of the Daily Show
Ms HAL 9000: I can not allow that Dave...Um, I think the satellite antenna on the roof needs fixing, why don't you climb up on the roof and adjust it?
Ms HAL 9000 (sotto voce): Mwuhaaaaahaaaaa!!!
such a famous item is for sale, and yet there are no fake bids on it. has ebay matured?
Only morons moderate based on a sig.
A Daisy, Daisy wheel...
the major advances in civilization are processes which all but wreck the societies in which they occur - A.N. White
"Open the iPod and play The Doors, HAL"
They come with their own letters of authenticity.
An eBay link, finnally something we can't slashdot.
Looking at the seller's feedback, we see:
works great. I get a great burn in my abs. thanks.
Famous movie props, ab workout machines. It's all the same. Who's the seller, Fred Sanford?
"$150,000?!?!? Lamont, you big dummy, no one's going to send that much money. Oh, Elizabeth, I'm comin' to join you!"
WTF, just make one. And build a house to live in while you're at it. Sheesh.
And you thought your Windows PC was an aberrant pain-in-the-ass...
Rather than investigate, trust the source.
Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
"My HAL9000 was six months late!!! will not do bussiness with again!!!"
Surely that's where their "code" went... How else could HAL have had such a God-complex...
In Soviet Russ... oh never mind.
"How do you ever know that 'letters of authenticity' are authentic?"
You validate them with letters of authenticity.
Ceci n'est pas une signature.
"You want the truth? You want the truth? I'm afraid that you can't handle the truth Dave." .."
"Ahh, right. Thanks, we'll call."
"Did I do something wrong? I am a HAL 9000 unit and all my systems are
"Fine fine. Next!"
One line blog. I hear that they're called Twitters now.
It's a fine example of a 1998 21" Magnavox, and I will let it go very resonably, say... $250,000.
No unreasonable offer refused.
From the auction text, it looks like the only actual part of the "computer" is the lens that was used as the "eye" of HAL.
Dang, really? I *thought* that was an awfully low price for a real working A.I.
Cylons, too. And this girl I knew once, in band camp...
Bush Lies On the Record.
> They come with their own letters of
> authenticity.
Naaaw. They come with CERTIFICATES of Authenticity.
At least that's what the weird looking guy with
bad teeth and funny ears said...
SIGLOST && SIGUNUSED && SIGQUIT
so, do i spend my hard earned money on:
i'll be safer with HAL i'm guessing.
scott king
--
Try Nuggets , the mobile search engine. We answer your questions via SMS, across the UK.
It might be fun to put a bid in, just so you can say that you went up against Paul Allen on eBay.
Chip H.
OK, I admit I had lost track of the damn thing, but that is no reason not to return it to it's rightful owner.
Yes, you're right.
And considering that the ship was last seen around Jupiter, you can definitely count on some serious shipping costs for this...
...HAL is past his expiration date!
Sig cancelled due to lack of interest