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11,000 Words on the Star Wars Trilogy DVDs

The Barking Dog writes "On Monday, September 27th DVD Verdict posted a bantha-sized review of the Star Wars Trilogy. Written by ten people and weighing in at over 11,000 words, it's probably the net's most thorough, extensive review of not only the DVDs, but Star Wars's impact on sci-fi and filmmaking in general. And as one of the contributors, I think that's a good thing."

43 of 435 comments (clear)

  1. 11 Words on the Star Wars Trilogy DVDs (Condensed) by The_Rippa · · Score: 5, Funny

    You are a sucker for purchasing this for the third time.

  2. Lucas sucks by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Repeated 5,500 times?

    1. Re:Lucas sucks by ConceptJunkie · · Score: 5, Funny

      Actually, the only got to 10000 words that way. The rest was filled with "Screw Flanders".

      --
      You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
  3. And as one of the contributors... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

    And as one of the contributors, I think that's a good thing.

    Well you would.

  4. Good Thing? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

    How is a large review of the DVD set of 25-year-old movies a good thing? Is the number of words supposed to impress readers? Does it provide any significant insight not already published about the movies? Is it full of "gee whiz, I sure liked Star Wars!" commentary?
    Reviews are meant to be shorter than the movies themselves.

    1. Re:Good Thing? by christopherfinke · · Score: 4, Funny
      Does it provide any significant insight not already published about the movies?
      Yeah, apparently, Darth Vader is Luke's father. I've got to see this for myself!
  5. Already Slashdotted Into Oblivion by falloutboy · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'll try again later, but if I see even a paragraph on who shot who at the cantina, I'm going to fall on my lightsaber.

    1. Re:Already Slashdotted Into Oblivion by christopherfinke · · Score: 5, Funny
      I'm going to fall on my lightsaber.
      Be careful not to bend your wookie.
  6. 11,000 words? by Black+Parrot · · Score: 4, Funny


    Wouldn't 11 screenshots be just as helpful?

    --
    Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
  7. At least he owned up to it... by benpharr · · Score: 5, Insightful

    At least the submitter owned up to being one of the authors of the review. Others haven't been as scrupulous. :)

  8. Now that's something the internet has been lacking by JudgeFurious · · Score: 4, Funny

    An 11,000 word group masturbation project based on the "Holy Trilogy".

    --
    Appended to the end of comments you post. 120 chars.
  9. Re:11,000 Words? by SkippyTPE · · Score: 5, Funny

    Justa so longo as meesa no have to read it...

  10. I saw a shorter/better review... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    The Cookiethievery review covers every released film, including a preview of the next one. Almost required visiting for any hardcore Star Wars fan (will you be standing in line for a week for the next one?)

  11. its the not the size by 2057 · · Score: 4, Funny

    It's not the size of the review its how you use it...err..

    --
    For The Best Jazz/Hip-hop fusion > COlD DUCK
  12. Hope you showed your friends first by potus98 · · Score: 4, Funny

    "...and as one of the contributors, I think that's a good thing."

    "Hey I know, I'll submit a story to /. ..." *KABOOOOOOM*

    That server went down faster than a barge gaurd in a sarlac pit.

    --
    This one gang kept wanting me to join cause I'm pretty good with a bo staff.
  13. Not that impressive... by Bamafan77 · · Score: 4, Insightful

    "On Monday, September 27th DVD Verdict posted a bantha-sized review of the Star Wars Trilogy. Written by ten people and weighing in at over 11,000 words..."

    That's nothing. I've seen more effort put into discussions concerning the far-reaching ramifications of Greedo shooting first and Han stepping over Jabba's tail alone.

  14. /.ed with no comments posted by FuzzyBad-Mofo · · Score: 5, Funny

    I sense a great disturbance in the force.. as if thousands of MySQL connections cried out in anguish, then were silenced.

    1. Re:/.ed with no comments posted by The+Barking+Dog · · Score: 5, Funny

      And I even made a plain HTML version of it that didn't do all the SQL queries this morning just in case it got posted. My lack of faith in the Slashdot Effect is disturbing...

  15. Re:11 Words -- 7 words, Yoda compression by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    You mean...

    For third time purchase, sucker you are.

  16. Darth Varder isn't such a badass.... by thewiz · · Score: 5, Funny

    20. His chest-mounted life support computer also doubles as an electronic day planner.

    Big deal, I hacked my pacemaker to double as an iPod!

    --
    If "disco" means "I learn" in Latin, does "discothèque" mean "I learn technology"?
  17. My review of the SW DVD by john_anderson_ii · · Score: 5, Funny
    VHS Remastered THX Collector's Set....$39
    DVD Remastered THX Collector's Set....$49
    Forcing wife to watch the whole trilogy yet again....priceless.

    --
    Be Safe! Sleep with a Marine. Semper Fi!
  18. Video Quality by Cowclops · · Score: 5, Interesting

    In light of the massive restoration effort by Lowry Digital, who did an awesome job with Indiana Jones (and other movies) the color quality is messed up beyond belief. To put it simply, theres too much red, and everything on the whole is too saturated. It just doesn't look natural. On the other hand, its quite sharp and clean considering how bad Lowry Digital said the condition was when they got it. It probably wasn't their fault on the color. If I recall correctly, GL wanted it to make it look similiar to the prequels. Since they were shot on HDCam it was probably just naturally saturated. Trying to adjust the film to look the same way however, has just left it looking completely unnatural. Even more interestingly is how when Lucas transffered Phantom Menace to DVD, he went hdcam->film->dvd to make it match the film look of the original trilogy. Now, he's tried to make the original trilogy match up in quality with the prequels by making them look "more digital." Example #346 of GL not being able to make up his mind.

  19. Re:11 Words on the Star Wars Trilogy DVDs (Condens by pete-classic · · Score: 5, Informative

    Three?

    1. Fox video stereo edition
    2. "THX" edition
    3. Laserdisc
    4. Special Edition
    5. Special Edition - Letterbox
    6. Special Edition on DVD

    That's just what I'm sure of off the top of my head. I would guess that the Fox video version was also available on Betamax, but I'm not sure.

    -Peter

  20. SW... Dystopian? by sielwolf · · Score: 5, Interesting

    In Star Wars, the future is a mess. From the rough-and-tumble welded and plated spaceships to the brushed concrete buildings full of dingy flickering lights, to dusty deserts and seedy cantinas, the universe envisioned in Star Wars had a gritty, industrial look, a jaded cynicism that had rarely been expressed in cinema before

    Eh? I can't agree with this. Outside of Mos Eisley, the world of the first three Star Wars movies was industrial, yet clean. Just go to the scenes inside the spaceships, the Death Star. The Imperial design was "blocky", but that is far from dystopian. It was more Victorian SF than say 1930's Futurism. Even the rebel base at the end of New Hope was pretty clean.

    And even Mos Eisley wasn't that bad (apart from being a wretched hive of scum and villainy). Dark? Ok... it was a bar. Outside it look about as dystopian as the ape town in Planet of the Apes. And that movie got dark and wierd when they found the remains of NYC (especially in Beneath with its post-apocolyptic underground).

    Bleek futures had existed in Hollywood before, and some were on a more grimey tip than SW: Soylent Green, The Omega Man. Basically anywhere you had a post-fallout society, you had some pessimistic views, a pessimism that Star Wars lacks.

    And that's just film. Dystopia was pretty stock in SF literature. The world of the proles was bad in 1984 or that even that of the Morlocks in Time Machine.

    The true thrust of dystopianism in film is usually agreed to be the merger of SF and Film Noir. This achieved critical mass with Ridley Scotts movies (Blade Runner, Alien both mentioned in this article). And many would point to Godard's 1956 Alphaville as the first movie to explore this connection. It even used a form of Orwell's Newspeak.

    There's probably more geneological ties to those movies than the pretty standard rebel v. evil empire aesthetic in Star Wars. And all of this does nothing to diminish the series' gargantuan impact.

    --
    What is music when you despise all sound?
  21. Re:DVD by jobber-d · · Score: 5, Insightful

    How is this interesting?! If I posted
    "I bought the DVD, and it's definitely NOT worth it, regardless of other people's opinions."
    would that be modded up too? lunacy

  22. Anakin's Redemption Diminished? by goldspider · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I thought the point of the "ghost" was to show the Jedi at (presumably) the latest point in their life they were "good".

    If that's the case (and maybe it's not), isn't the importance of Anakin Skywalker's redemption somewhat diminished if his apparition doesn't really reflect the fact that he abandoned the Dark Side at the end?

    This is probably a debate for bigger Star Wars nerds than I, but I thought I should at least throw that out to the discussion.

    --
    "Ask not what your country can do for you." --John F. Kennedy
  23. The Future? by Thu25245 · · Score: 5, Insightful
    In Star Wars, the future is a mess...

    It was a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. Where do you get this "future?"

  24. Re:/.'d already... Article Text by SpiffyMarc · · Score: 4, Informative

    This isn't text of the linked article.

  25. DVDs are good - 111 word review by kooshvt · · Score: 4, Interesting

    I never purchased or watched the special editions of the movies prior to purchasing the DVDs. I felt that they were an abomination and should be avoided. Unfortunatly I was bored the other night and broke down and bought them (I just got a 51" widescreen tv and really wanted to see them).

    Overall most of the enhancements are ok. There are only 4 things I would have eliminated or not changed.
    1) Han shoots first.
    2) The silly extended dance routine in Jabba's Palace.
    3) Hayden Christensen as a spirit at the end of Jedi. This just doesn't make sense.
    4) The celebration song at the end of Jedi. I missed the old one.

  26. Wait, 11 000 words = 22 000 bytes by Psionicist · · Score: 5, Funny

    1. 11 000 words = 22 000 bytes.
    2. Assuming an average word is 5 bytes, the text is actually 4 400 words.
    3. Repeat.

    The review is actually just one quad word in hexadecimal notation: 10CA550CC5.

    Oh what the heck:

    4. Profit.

  27. Misread the summary by goldspider · · Score: 4, Funny
    Maybe I'm just really tired, but did anyone else read "Written by ten people weighing in at over 11,000 pounds" in that summary?

    Comon, it's not like it's that unplausible!

    --
    "Ask not what your country can do for you." --John F. Kennedy
  28. My Impressions of the DVD set by Gonarat · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Overall, I was impressed with the DVD set, although at times Lucas is trying too much to link them to the first three movies.

    Good things:

    Most of the changes that were from the 1997 releases were good IMHO, such as making Mos Eisley look bigger and "more alive", making the Cloud City a little less claustrophobic, and making the Death Star and Alderaan explosions a little more impressive. I also liked Jabba's new band in Ep-6, it seemed the kind of excess a crime lord like Jabba would have.

    The changes I didn't care much for includes changing the Han/Greedo shooting scene (again - that should have been left alone), changes in the shooting scene in the Prison Block (Imperial Personnel are no longer obviously shot), the new Anakin Skywalker ghost at the end of EP6 along with all of the firework scenes from various locations (actually, I have mixed feeling on this one -- I know that the Emperor was killed, but would the Empire crumble that quickly? We are talking about hours to a day or so from the destruction of the Death Star II to Vader's funeral pyre.

    There are other changes (both 1997 vintage and new to this set), but they are for the most part do not affect the movie one way or the other, at least in my opinion.

    The 3 movies are still fun to watch, so as far as I'm concerned, the purchase was worth it. It would be nice to be able to get the original movies on DVD, too.

    --
    Beware of Sleestak
  29. Re:"Star Wars" Made "Star Trek: TMP" Possible by Mordaximus · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Hate to break it to you, but Gene Roddenberry began work on the new Star Trek in 1975 (Two years before Star Wars had any sway)... Originaly for TV, it evolved into a Motion Picture later on. Not to mention the cartoon between 1973 and 1975.

    Star Trek was HUGE in the 70s, moreso than when it was in original runs.

    Methinks that maybe you weren't born when Star Wars or Star Trek made their original theater runs :)

  30. I like this by $RANDOMLUSER · · Score: 5, Funny

    Here's a situation where none of us has RTFA.

    --
    No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
  31. Re:"Star Wars" Made "Star Trek: TMP" Possible by Gzip+Christ · · Score: 5, Funny
    Sometimes. Just sometimes. Good wins.
    Evil will always triumph over good because good is dumb.

    (Now that is a good movie.)

  32. Re:11 Words on the Star Wars Trilogy DVDs (Condens by NoMoreNicksLeft · · Score: 4, Funny

    One wonders if a Davinci who lived long into old age, might have painted a smile face on top of the Mona Lisa in a fit of senility...

  33. this just in: by hdd · · Score: 5, Funny
    50% Funny
    20% Troll
    20% Overrated

    according to a new poll, only 50% of slashdotters mastubate.

    mod me up for not posting this anonymously!

    --
    This Sig is removed due to factual inaccuracy
  34. MOD PARENT UP! by Tibor+the+Hun · · Score: 4, Insightful

    (my first ever MPU! post)

    Absolutely, it was all about the redemption!

    And to erase the redeemed Anakin is to nullify the moment when he saw his son being zapped by the Emperor, deciding "fuck it, it was never supposed to be this way", and taking the Emperor out.

    I didn't buy the DVDs, nor do I plan to, especially since now I wonder whether in "Lucas' Vision" Anakin ever got redeemed, or if Anakin was truly destroyed by Vader.

    Not that it really matters, but it does change the premise of the movie.

    --
    If you don't know what AltaVista is (was), get off my lawn.
  35. So explain this... by gosand · · Score: 4, Insightful
    I thought the point of the "ghost" was to show the Jedi at (presumably) the latest point in their life they were "good". If that's the case (and maybe it's not), isn't the importance of Anakin Skywalker's redemption somewhat diminished if his apparition doesn't really reflect the fact that he abandoned the Dark Side at the end?

    So how the hell did Luke recognize him?

    --

    My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.

    1. Re:So explain this... by HeghmoH · · Score: 4, Funny

      We're talking about films that are filled with magical people that can levitate things with their minds, fight with their eyes closed, deflect laser blasts with hand-held energy swords, and talk telepathically between space ships, and you don't see how one of these magical people would be able to recognize his own father?

      --
      Mod down posts with a "Free Mac Mini/iPod" sig, they're spam!
  36. Re:True by jest3r · · Score: 4, Funny

    have you seen the changes Lucas is making to Attack of the Clones??

    http://www.mtonic.com/sw.html

  37. Re:Han fired first. by Jugalator · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Han fired first. Period. The fact that he did speaks to his character, and changing that changes his character.

    In the 2004 edition, Han fires pretty much simultaneously as Greedo. Maybe slightly after, but IMHO so shortly afterwards that it can't have been a reaction to Greedo, but more that both was thinking the same thing, and firing about the same time.

    What I think Lucas tried to do in the Special Edition wasn't to make Solo look like a wimp, but to make Greedo look evil. He is more evil than Han Solo after all. You can say he's as much as a scumbag as you want, but he do belong to the good guys. So I think Lucas considered it logical to make Greedo shoot first in SE, then realized his mistake and tried to fix it up while maintaining Greedo's intents (that it -- to not just sit there waiting to get killed).

    --
    Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
  38. Going from great to good by jnd3 · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I haven't seen anyone else, anywhere, mentioning the ONE thing that absolutely ruined ESB for me. The scene occurs right after Luke jumps down the shaft in Cloud City. Darth Vader is walking out, and the only words out of his mouth are a husky-sounding, "Bring my shuttle." There was a depth of emotion -- anger, sadness -- that I picked up on in that little scene.

    Now they've got this lame voice-over from Vader, "Alert the commander to prepare for my arrival," or something like that. Throw in some re-used footage from RotJ (Vader's Death Star II arrival) for when he lands on his flagship and you've taken ALL the emotion out of Vader's revelation and its consequences (at least on his part).

    Everything else I could cope with ... yeah, Han shoots first, but whatever ... more digital aliens, gives the ILM guys good practice ... but in my opinion that single scene took a great movie and made it into a merely good movie.