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Spammers Sue Spamee
sebFlyte writes "In an interesting take on the law, some (alleged) spammers are suing some poor chap who got them blocked by ISPs due to the fact they kept sending him spam. According to Spamhaus the company doing the suing is on their books as spammer, and also as a spyware company... If this case goes the wrong way, things could get very sticky for anyone wanting to report spam."
WARS
Episode V
The Spammer Strikes Back
It is a dark time for the Internet. Although Spamford Wallace has been shut down, Atriks spammers have driven the irate users from their inboxes and pursued them into court.
Evading the dreaded Distributed Mail Corporation, a group of freedom fighters led by Jay Stuler has established a new secret base on the remote ice world of Ohio.
The evil lord Darth Haberstroh, obsessed with harassing young Stuler, has dispatched thousands of spambots into the far reaches of the Internet...
How am I supposed to fit a pithy, relevant quote into 120 characters?
Only in America!
Damn, I better take that No Junk Mail sticker off my mailbox. I hear the Post Office has some mean ass lawyers.
it's not over until the government makes you buy the viagra!
It's called "can" spam for a reason.
If we get a judge with a clue we can all wait 6 months for the dupe, then another 6 and we can all post "HAHAHAHAHA PWNED!"
But if we get some idiot judge who's magically got some extra money and an errectional problem... well I suspect I may have to change my Gmail account incase I get sued for reporting a scam..
I like muppets.
next up they'll sue a customer for using a spyware renover to keep their spyware off
Darth Haberstroh: Jay, I am...not your father.
Jay Stuler: Wait, so who is?
Darth Haberstroh: Ummm...must be one of those old fogies I sold Viagra to.
Jay: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Winchester Rifles sues Vestgard, manufacturer of bullet-proof vests and body armour.
Drill baby drill - on Mars
I think that statement is defamatory to California. I'll see you in court!
The CB App. What's your 20?
I'm helping... I've decided to pick my way through the atricks website to find a chink in their case. Unfortunately, I'm such a bumbler that the wget script I set up to collate information has a serious bug and appears to be stuck in a loop! I believe it's the part where I set a loop counter to 16,000,000 near the top but I can't be bothered to go changing things now... might lead to more bugs... Guess I'll just wait until it stops on its own ;-)
Code, Hardware, stuff like that.
We ARE in Soviet Russia. -- Spammers sue YOU.
He should do what he can to insure the attorney representing the spammer is disbarred. Nothing says "Happy Valentines Day, Mother Fucker," than being kicked out of the only job they've trained to do.
If this case goes wrong, I think it opens the door for perfectly moral vigilanteism.
Post it, maybe we can help debug it. Might take a bit of time though, and a few test runs.
it's time te give up on e-mail.
/. account will get a unique mail-address and the headers will be checked.
i'll write my own mail solution. one time access, invitation only. you would have to log on to my system in order to send me an email.
if you want me to read the mail you'll have to pay me 10 in advance, which will be refunded if i think your mail isn't spam.
my
Privacy is terrorism.
Fortunately(?) everyone is affect by spam equally.
This includes judges.
They will hate the prosecution from the word go and have them held in contempt of court just for sneezing, including the laywers, and hand out capital sentences.
> If no one uses Email anymore,
But how will the old people communicate?
-fb Everything not expressly forbidden is now mandatory.
Because of course there's no way in hell that the plaintiff would make anything up before the trial to make them look less stupid.
Throw a few cans of Hormel's canned meat product through their windows.
The higher the technology, the sharper that two-edged sword.
first report to us(./) we will shut them down.
I can go you one better...
One drunken evening a year or so ago I absolutely lost my cool when I came home to a deluge of spam that was bigger than I had ever seen. After dutifully reporting each and every one of them to Spamcop I stumbled across one particular email that was sent by/for a business that was stupid enough to use their 800# in the body of the mail. My evil mind went to work, and after a few minutes of scripting in my head the following conversation (as far as I can remember it) ensued.
[ring ring]
Thank you for calling XXX, my name is Kathy, how can I help you? Me: (using the biggest, dumbest, drive-time DJ voice I can muster): KATHY! HOW ARE YOU?! You're lucky listener number 20 tonight! Are you feeling lucky? Are you?
K: Wha...? Who is th- DJ: Kathy! You listen to Brian and Bob in the mornings on Z-101, right? K: Umm... yeah! (Who's gonna get a call like that and say no, hm?) DJ: So here's the story Kathy - we got your name from some of your co-workers and entered it into our big contest drawing this month, and...
(uncomfortably long pause...)
K: And wha-? DJ: AND YOUR NAME CAME UP IN OUR 80'S ROCK TRIVIA CHALLENGE, KATHY! ARE YOU EXCITED?! K: Oh yeah, what are we-? DJ: Kathy? K: Yeah?
DJ: ARE YOU READY TO WIN $50,000 DOLLARS?!
(pause)
K: ARE YOU SERIOU-? DJ: We're ABSOLUTELY serious, Kathy! You are exactly ONE question away from winning FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS!
(at this point, I knew I had her. I could hear her cup the phone with her hand and start yelling at what had to be an entire office full of people.)
DJ: Kathy? Are you ready? Get the men and women at work with you to help out!
K: Sure!
(she was hyperventilating at this point)
DJ: Kathy, here's what we want to know...
(another uncomfortable pause)
DJ: For fifty thousand dollars...
(yet another pause, during which I heard the sound of ten different computers firing up Google in anticipation...)
DJ: What one-hit-wonder from the mid-80's was notable for their lead singer's visible physical deformity?!
(sheer, dead silence for a moment that lasted forever)
K: What WHAT?
DJ: TEN SECONDS!!
(at this point, she freaked. she tried to cover the phone and missed, and as I loudly counted down from ten to one I heard an entire office simultaneously melt down. "One-hit WHAT?! DEFORMITY? WHAT THE...!?"
DJ: THREE! TWO!
K: OH MY G-!
DJ: ONE! OH, NO! You JUST missed it, Kathy! Fifty thousand dollars, and you JUST didn't get it. It's too bad, too - I gave you SUCH a hint!
K: You WHAT? Hint? WHAT TH-?
DJ: Oh, Kathy - I practically gave it to you. I told you to get some help from the women... and MEN AT WORK! It was Men at Work, and you must be feeling really stupid right now not remembering Colin Hay and that freaky wandering eyeball he has! Remember that eye? Of course you do! You must be feeling so stupid right now!
(at this point my roommate, who's been watching the entire affair in bugeyed amazement, chimes in with "So FUCKING stupid!!" loud enough for her to hear it. I nearly had an aneurysm...)
DJ: Yeah, that was Bob... he calls 'em like he sees 'em. How you feeling, Kathy?
(it's at this point that I'm pretty sure I earned myself a warm spot in Hell, because she sounded like she was about to be sick...)
K: Oh God, I was so c...
(and if I wasn't going to Hell yet...)
DJ: But don't forget, Kathy - there's only one other person on our mega prize list today, and if they miss the Trivia Challenge question too, the money is YOURS!!
K: Are you SERIOUS?!
DJ: I'm DEAD serious, Kathy! Before the day is out you just might have that money! But remember, you have to get to the phone within two rings - so stay close to the phone and answer with our slogan! "Brian and Bob rock me HARD!" Can you do it now?
K: Bri... um, Brian and Bob rock me HARD!!
DJ: Excellent, Kathy! So remember, a
Cool - so then pay phones still have a use after all!
A sentence you'll never see on an Internet discussion board: "You know what? You're right."